Wanting less and living more
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Wanting less and living more
Today is a good day to start my journal. My husband has Covid 19 and I just sent an email to my manager to let her know that I won't be at work this weekend so that I can be home to care for him and our four kids. It's not technically an FMLA protected absence (unless, God forbid, things get a lot worse). As a result, I'm possibly placing my weekend contract status in jeopardy by calling off on a holiday weekend, but I am a mother and a wife before I'm a nurse and an employee, and it felt great to send that email.
The other E.R.E.-ish thing I did today was construct a "self-closing" portiere rod for our front door curtains. They are there to keep the draft out of our 100+ year old house, and the door was running into them every time we opened it, which was very inconvenient. I could have ordered a purpose made rod for $80 plus shipping from England. God, the carbon footprint on that would be enormous, although it appears to be beautifully made by blacksmiths instead of machines. But, I took the curtain rod we already hand, hammered the brackets into new shapes, hammered one end of the rod flat, drove a nail through it for a hinge, and hung it all back up. Now the curtains move back and forth with the door. I don't think I could be more pleased with myself.
Anyhow that's why I'm here. I'm interested in doing things for myself, and living as a human being, not a wage worker. I like wanting less instead of earning more. I want to be rich in skills and relationships; status is boring.
The small details: My husband and I both work part time (me: two 12 hour days, him: four 8 hour days). One of us is always home with the kids, and the school aged ones are home schooled. We have some savings, and a mortgage, a paid off old car, and a small amount of consumer debt from when we were facing some health challenges last year and resorted to buying convenience in order to make margin. I also have some low interest student loans that are almost paid off. In the next six months, our focus is paying off the higher interest consumer debt. I'll continue to make minimum payments on the student loans, but I'm not in a hurry there. I would like to accelerate our mortgage payments, though. We live on a small urban lot, and over the next year there are some changes I want to make to our house to become more circular. These are things like installing rain barrels, digging small trenches through my front garden so that the rain coming from the gutter there will irrigate my food plants. I also would like to install a wood-burning stove, in light of what just happened in Buffalo.
I have a feeling I will mostly write about small projects because they represent a change of mindset. Instead of solving a problem by buying a product, I can solve a problem by making observations, thinking about how things work, using what I have, and trying something new.
The other E.R.E.-ish thing I did today was construct a "self-closing" portiere rod for our front door curtains. They are there to keep the draft out of our 100+ year old house, and the door was running into them every time we opened it, which was very inconvenient. I could have ordered a purpose made rod for $80 plus shipping from England. God, the carbon footprint on that would be enormous, although it appears to be beautifully made by blacksmiths instead of machines. But, I took the curtain rod we already hand, hammered the brackets into new shapes, hammered one end of the rod flat, drove a nail through it for a hinge, and hung it all back up. Now the curtains move back and forth with the door. I don't think I could be more pleased with myself.
Anyhow that's why I'm here. I'm interested in doing things for myself, and living as a human being, not a wage worker. I like wanting less instead of earning more. I want to be rich in skills and relationships; status is boring.
The small details: My husband and I both work part time (me: two 12 hour days, him: four 8 hour days). One of us is always home with the kids, and the school aged ones are home schooled. We have some savings, and a mortgage, a paid off old car, and a small amount of consumer debt from when we were facing some health challenges last year and resorted to buying convenience in order to make margin. I also have some low interest student loans that are almost paid off. In the next six months, our focus is paying off the higher interest consumer debt. I'll continue to make minimum payments on the student loans, but I'm not in a hurry there. I would like to accelerate our mortgage payments, though. We live on a small urban lot, and over the next year there are some changes I want to make to our house to become more circular. These are things like installing rain barrels, digging small trenches through my front garden so that the rain coming from the gutter there will irrigate my food plants. I also would like to install a wood-burning stove, in light of what just happened in Buffalo.
I have a feeling I will mostly write about small projects because they represent a change of mindset. Instead of solving a problem by buying a product, I can solve a problem by making observations, thinking about how things work, using what I have, and trying something new.
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Welcome to the forum! Excited to hear about what you can achieve on the resiliency front in an urban setting.
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Re: Wanting less and living more
I'm interested to hear about your projects. I hope your husband feels better soon!
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Re: Wanting less and living more
I like crabapples. Welcome!
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Re: Wanting less and living more
From a new forum member to another, welcome! I look forward to seeing how your projects come along.
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Hi folks. Thank you for the welcome. Sorry it took an entire year for me to reply! Life happened....
Anyhow, some great things happened recently. First, I had been writing letters and filling out surveys to complain that the bus arrives at my workplace 8 minutes after the start of the shift. I work for the second largest employer in the region.... come on, I can't be 8 minutes late every day. Well it's paid off because now the bus comes 15 minutes before the start of the shift!
So, I ride the bus to work in the morning. I no longer have to pay for parking ($6/day) AND my employer pays my bus fare! AND my husband gets the use of the car while he is at home with the kids.
On the way home, I walk. I love walking home. I get to enjoy being outside, get some exercise, and have time to unwind from my shift. It also makes for fine scavenging.
Two nights ago when I was walking home, I found a sewing machine on the curb. There was a note that said "tension needs to be fixed." So I carried it home. Most of the time "tension problems" are easily solved by blowing out the lint, putting on a fresh needle, using decent thread, and making sure you threaded everything correctly.
All this was true. I now own a perfectly functional sewing machine. Not sure whether to sell it or just keep it set up in my bedroom. I already sewed a cover for a hot water bottle. That took 5 minutes and an old sweater, and now my daughter is snuggling it in bed.
Speaking of the hot water bottle, it came from our local "by the pound" thrift store. I've been scrounging there and selling on FB marketplace. Just pocket change but it's fun and scratches my foraging itch in the winter.
The last fun habit I've revived this year is using the library. Been reading a lot of Jared Diamond and Nassir Taleb. Next up, though, is "The Scavengers Manifesto" by Anneli Rufus and Kristan Lawson.
Anyhow, some great things happened recently. First, I had been writing letters and filling out surveys to complain that the bus arrives at my workplace 8 minutes after the start of the shift. I work for the second largest employer in the region.... come on, I can't be 8 minutes late every day. Well it's paid off because now the bus comes 15 minutes before the start of the shift!
So, I ride the bus to work in the morning. I no longer have to pay for parking ($6/day) AND my employer pays my bus fare! AND my husband gets the use of the car while he is at home with the kids.
On the way home, I walk. I love walking home. I get to enjoy being outside, get some exercise, and have time to unwind from my shift. It also makes for fine scavenging.
Two nights ago when I was walking home, I found a sewing machine on the curb. There was a note that said "tension needs to be fixed." So I carried it home. Most of the time "tension problems" are easily solved by blowing out the lint, putting on a fresh needle, using decent thread, and making sure you threaded everything correctly.
All this was true. I now own a perfectly functional sewing machine. Not sure whether to sell it or just keep it set up in my bedroom. I already sewed a cover for a hot water bottle. That took 5 minutes and an old sweater, and now my daughter is snuggling it in bed.
Speaking of the hot water bottle, it came from our local "by the pound" thrift store. I've been scrounging there and selling on FB marketplace. Just pocket change but it's fun and scratches my foraging itch in the winter.
The last fun habit I've revived this year is using the library. Been reading a lot of Jared Diamond and Nassir Taleb. Next up, though, is "The Scavengers Manifesto" by Anneli Rufus and Kristan Lawson.
Re: Wanting less and living more
Sounds awesome! Congrats both on the bus situation and on the machine. These are both great wins. Seems like you've found a couple of ways to solve problems in your life that are both frugal and at the same time make you healthy and happy, an excellent win
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Excellent! Please keep posting!
Re: Wanting less and living more
My wife uses a hot water bottle and I've noticed their decline in popularity. They are bottom shelf items, limited in inventory (I never see more than 2) placed next to Medieval looking shit like forceps and enemas and possibly douches but I make it point not to look at those items because I hate all things related to the care of the human body especially those things that require insertion. I get weak kneed at the site of a Q-Tip. I always have to ask the worker where they are and it often takes a tour of the pharmacy to locate them because they don't know where the fuck they are either. They last for a good while but eventually the screw in thingy gets stripped and the hot water leaks out and you get a mild burn and stain on your couch. Life is so fucking disgusting when you think upon it.crabapples wrote: ↑Mon Mar 18, 2024 8:32 pmSpeaking of the hot water bottle, it came from our local "by the pound" thrift store.
Re: Wanting less and living more
Welcome!
Looking forward to next year's update!
Looking forward to next year's update!

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Re: Wanting less and living more
Ahead of schedule with this update. It's only been a few months!
Henry - the water bottle did get a leak, mostly from being manhandled by the kids. Gorilla tape mostly holding up though.
About a year ago one of my kids had some health problems which meant we began cooking all our meals at home. In my 20s, I was a proficient and frugal cook. In my 30s, life got hectic and home cooking went by the wayside. Now in my 40s, I'm getting good at it again.
Right now my husband does the grocery shopping on his lunch break. He buys what he needs to make dinner. Between my garden, my pantry, and the leftover bits from the meals he cooks (dinners and weekends), I supply all the other meals.
Husband buys fresh fruit almost every time he goes to the store.. There are always a few pieces that don't get eaten. This used to spoil and get thrown away. Now I chop it up, add some sugar and cook it into a jam. I pour the jam into jars saved from other foods and keep it in the fridge. It takes almost no work and no additional expense, and I have an assortment of 6 to 8 oz jars of jam. Tonight I'm going make some pie crust and then make hand pies using my jam. The kids will have it for a snack.... from the 5 sad strawberries and two half eaten peaches my preschoolers left on the kitchen table, as well as the bit of cream cheese left over from bagels on Monday.
I've also gotten proficient at making bread. It takes five minutes to mix up. I only knead enough for it to become a dough. Then I leave it to rise twice, slowly. And it tastes great. I don't make all our bread.... I only make bread when I want it, and we don't already have some in the house.
The idea is to do with all the little bits of time, and food, to make more of little, without working too hard at it.
The garden, on the other hand.... I love puttering in the garden. It's exercise and entertainment as much as it is anything else. Along the lines of coaxing more from less, I'm trying to persuade my kale, raab, and arugula to naturalize in my yard. Then my weeds will be good to eat. Did you know that in addition to being delicious, arugula has the most beautiful flowers? Pale greenish white with little burgundy veins.
Henry - the water bottle did get a leak, mostly from being manhandled by the kids. Gorilla tape mostly holding up though.
About a year ago one of my kids had some health problems which meant we began cooking all our meals at home. In my 20s, I was a proficient and frugal cook. In my 30s, life got hectic and home cooking went by the wayside. Now in my 40s, I'm getting good at it again.
Right now my husband does the grocery shopping on his lunch break. He buys what he needs to make dinner. Between my garden, my pantry, and the leftover bits from the meals he cooks (dinners and weekends), I supply all the other meals.
Husband buys fresh fruit almost every time he goes to the store.. There are always a few pieces that don't get eaten. This used to spoil and get thrown away. Now I chop it up, add some sugar and cook it into a jam. I pour the jam into jars saved from other foods and keep it in the fridge. It takes almost no work and no additional expense, and I have an assortment of 6 to 8 oz jars of jam. Tonight I'm going make some pie crust and then make hand pies using my jam. The kids will have it for a snack.... from the 5 sad strawberries and two half eaten peaches my preschoolers left on the kitchen table, as well as the bit of cream cheese left over from bagels on Monday.
I've also gotten proficient at making bread. It takes five minutes to mix up. I only knead enough for it to become a dough. Then I leave it to rise twice, slowly. And it tastes great. I don't make all our bread.... I only make bread when I want it, and we don't already have some in the house.
The idea is to do with all the little bits of time, and food, to make more of little, without working too hard at it.
The garden, on the other hand.... I love puttering in the garden. It's exercise and entertainment as much as it is anything else. Along the lines of coaxing more from less, I'm trying to persuade my kale, raab, and arugula to naturalize in my yard. Then my weeds will be good to eat. Did you know that in addition to being delicious, arugula has the most beautiful flowers? Pale greenish white with little burgundy veins.
Re: Wanting less and living more
Thanks for your journal update! Baking your own bread sounds interesting, I'm hoping to learn that some day.
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Re: Wanting less and living more
I did a spending audit and identified about $1400 worth of unnecessary spending over the past few months. Over the years, I've gotten lazy and easy to justify "this or that little thing" which is ultimately so wasteful, all in dribs and drabs... $20 here, $40 there. Never anything substantial. Never anything really meaningful...usually spent out of time pressure, a desire to just do "the easiest thing" (but not really) or out of impatience and impulsivity.
I've decided to do a no spend month in the categories most contributing to that spending (books, meals out, garden stuff, thrifting for entertainment instead of for an actual need). The thrifting in particular has become a bad habit. It started out as a way to get my reclusive teenage daughter out of the house and in that regard it was very effective. The problem is that I like junk and can always find something that is a "bargain." Or something that I think I can sell. I used to have pretty good turnover on FB Marketplace but I am off all social media now and do not have the energy or patience to work out how to resell in other venues.
So once my spending freeze is over, I've set a budget for those categories ($70 per month total), and I will reassess in a few months. I let my teenage daughter know that while we could still visit the thrift store together we will do it less, and there would now be a budget. If she wanted to spend her own money she could.
I hope to gain self control and work back to a habit of identifying our true needs, and to solving problems without resorting to mindless spending.
So, problems I solved this week without spending:
-used old broomsticks and chairs to make a laundry drying rack, instead of buying a rack. (Or a new dryer for that matter. My husband wants one for the winter but has agreed to defer until then.)
- took the bus to pick my son up from day camp. I was never going to do anything else but I guess I could have talked myself into an Uber at some point.
-packed up my kids clothes in old bags we had lying around the house instead of buying bins
-used leftover bedding packaging to store winter blankets (instead of buying zipper bags)
-threw away rotting old wool rugs that were decaying in my yard. There's no spending alternative here but picking up trash makes the place look more cared for than anything I could ever buy.
-set up my compost bin using old trashcan in the middle of a ring of fruit bushes (two bushes were free from a friend getting rid of them)
-got several loads of free city compost for my plants
-borrowed my neighbor's shovel because mine was broken.
-cleaned my kitchen a lot (instead of hunting for a feeling of satisfaction in more acquisitive activities)
-browsed for new books at the library 3x instead of ordering from an online seller
-cleaned my bedroom, organized my papers, packed off books for the little free library, and took too small clothes to be donated. (See above.) If I reduce my environmental overwhelm I will be less depleted and more creative.
-diligently packed ahead for meals and resisted the temptation to kill time in a coffee shop.
-trash picked and cleaned some baby things that I thought i could sell on consignment, then decided that would be a temptation to spend. So I donated it instead. Out of the landfill, which is its own reward.
-dug up some roadside plants to bring back to my garden instead of buying them. (Motherwort, jewelweed, chicory, stuff no one but me wants.)
-this is a bit old but my neighbors wanted some signs to put in the street when we have all the kids playing out, so I pulled some wood, paint and an abandoned umbrella stand out of my dragon's hoard and made the signs of old table leafs. They are yellow and black and say "play street drive slow" and the umbrella stand makes them look rather official.
I've decided to do a no spend month in the categories most contributing to that spending (books, meals out, garden stuff, thrifting for entertainment instead of for an actual need). The thrifting in particular has become a bad habit. It started out as a way to get my reclusive teenage daughter out of the house and in that regard it was very effective. The problem is that I like junk and can always find something that is a "bargain." Or something that I think I can sell. I used to have pretty good turnover on FB Marketplace but I am off all social media now and do not have the energy or patience to work out how to resell in other venues.
So once my spending freeze is over, I've set a budget for those categories ($70 per month total), and I will reassess in a few months. I let my teenage daughter know that while we could still visit the thrift store together we will do it less, and there would now be a budget. If she wanted to spend her own money she could.
I hope to gain self control and work back to a habit of identifying our true needs, and to solving problems without resorting to mindless spending.
So, problems I solved this week without spending:
-used old broomsticks and chairs to make a laundry drying rack, instead of buying a rack. (Or a new dryer for that matter. My husband wants one for the winter but has agreed to defer until then.)
- took the bus to pick my son up from day camp. I was never going to do anything else but I guess I could have talked myself into an Uber at some point.
-packed up my kids clothes in old bags we had lying around the house instead of buying bins
-used leftover bedding packaging to store winter blankets (instead of buying zipper bags)
-threw away rotting old wool rugs that were decaying in my yard. There's no spending alternative here but picking up trash makes the place look more cared for than anything I could ever buy.
-set up my compost bin using old trashcan in the middle of a ring of fruit bushes (two bushes were free from a friend getting rid of them)
-got several loads of free city compost for my plants
-borrowed my neighbor's shovel because mine was broken.
-cleaned my kitchen a lot (instead of hunting for a feeling of satisfaction in more acquisitive activities)
-browsed for new books at the library 3x instead of ordering from an online seller
-cleaned my bedroom, organized my papers, packed off books for the little free library, and took too small clothes to be donated. (See above.) If I reduce my environmental overwhelm I will be less depleted and more creative.
-diligently packed ahead for meals and resisted the temptation to kill time in a coffee shop.
-trash picked and cleaned some baby things that I thought i could sell on consignment, then decided that would be a temptation to spend. So I donated it instead. Out of the landfill, which is its own reward.
-dug up some roadside plants to bring back to my garden instead of buying them. (Motherwort, jewelweed, chicory, stuff no one but me wants.)
-this is a bit old but my neighbors wanted some signs to put in the street when we have all the kids playing out, so I pulled some wood, paint and an abandoned umbrella stand out of my dragon's hoard and made the signs of old table leafs. They are yellow and black and say "play street drive slow" and the umbrella stand makes them look rather official.
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Forgot to add the most important thing. A friend from church was trying to unload half a sheet cake so I took it off his hands and froze it. And I am now eating it.
Re: Wanting less and living more
I can relate to that! I'm also doing an audit at the moment, both for unnecessary spending and for regular spending that is necessary but where I didn't price-check for the last 6-7 years. What used to be the cheapest option often isn't anymore, sometimes by an order of magnitude.crabapples wrote: ↑Fri Jul 12, 2024 10:16 pmOver the years, I've gotten lazy and easy to justify "this or that little thing" which is ultimately so wasteful, all in dribs and drabs... $20 here, $40 there. Never anything substantial. Never anything really meaningful...usually spent out of time pressure, a desire to just do "the easiest thing" (but not really) or out of impatience and impulsivity.
I like your plan of doing a no-spend month for specific budget categories! I've been trying to set a tight monthly limit to the overall budget to teach myself how to keep an eye out for all these things again but I'm getting caught out by lumpy expenses. Outside of that it's working well enough.
Your list of problems resolved without spending is great, both for a single week and as a general idea!
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Hi Mousse, how is it going this week?Mousse wrote: ↑Sat Jul 13, 2024 1:36 amI can relate to that! I'm also doing an audit at the moment, both for unnecessary spending and for regular spending that is necessary but where I didn't price-check for the last 6-7 years. What used to be the cheapest option often isn't anymore, sometimes by an order of magnitude.
I like your plan of doing a no-spend month for specific budget categories! I've been trying to set a tight monthly limit to the overall budget to teach myself how to keep an eye out for all these things again but I'm getting caught out by lumpy expenses. Outside of that it's working well enough.
Your list of problems resolved without spending is great, both for a single week and as a general idea!
I have done a good job of writing down all my spending. I've also done a good job of eliminating frivolous thrift store spending. I did buy 3 books (Moby Dick, and two nature books for my homeschooled children), which is more than the zero I planned to but much less than what I would have done otherwise. So it's a baby step in the right direction.
Problems I solved/things I did this week:
The microwave kept arcing. We diagnosed the problem as coming from a replaceable part, but there was damage to the actual body of the microwave which might cause the problem to repeat. Rather than purchasing new parts or a whole new microwave, we got one for $15 from the thrift store. It needed a minor repair but functions well. (My husband was not willing to live without for any length of time and I was not willing to purchase new, so we were both happy with this outcome.) We now have the knowledge to prevent this problem in the future.
The refrigerator compressor was overheating.
I didn'teven know the name of that part last week. But it's been going on a while and I was afraid we would need to make expensive repairs or buy another fridge. But first I checked out a book on fridge repair from Internet Archive, then unstuck the condenser fan and added a backing that was missing (by which I mean I placed an appropriately sized bin lid back there) so that the air would be directed through the condenser fins. I also cleaned the fins, and lastly I spent $36 for an OEM gasket to replace the damaged door gasket. It's running beautifully now, the compressor is only Moderately warm, and no more heat is coming off random parts. The inside is really cold on the lowest setting. I think our electric bill will go down.
So I learned how my fridge and microwave worked this week which is valuable. And I taught what I learned to my 15 year old daughter.
I've read a number if books for free this week thanks to our wonderful public library.
I put together a little free library using things I already owned.
Lastly, because I had not spent on frivolous things, this past two weeks, I had no hesitation about taking my kids on a day trip through the countryside yesterday. We were invited by a family friend, and I rarely take the kids on long outings, so it was a bit of a challenge. We picked berries, dug up chicory, and ate ice cream made from duck eggs. I could have reduced spending on fast food with some better planning (I overslept and had to skip packing a cooler so we could get my husband to work on time), but I don't usually get fast food at all so this was also fine as a baby step. I also explained to my 10 year old that it was less expensive to share a single large meal than buy two separate smaller meals. He has some issues with inflexibility but was able to adapt to this decision and shared a meal and a drink with me, while his younger siblings shared a meal.
All in all a good week. I used money as a tool to meet our needs instead of mindlessly. There is obvious room for me to grow but I am going the right direction.
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Boring numbers:
Consumer debt was paid off in 2023.
Mortgage payments increased by $500/month a year ago. Our house will be paid off in 4 and a half years. This was a 30 year mortgage and we will have paid it off in just over 11 years!
Consumer debt was paid off in 2023.
Mortgage payments increased by $500/month a year ago. Our house will be paid off in 4 and a half years. This was a 30 year mortgage and we will have paid it off in just over 11 years!
Re: Wanting less and living more
What do you use chicory root for?
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Some people roast it for tea, but I transplanted the roots into pots. I will grow them outside while it's warm, so the roots will store energy. Then in the winter, I should be able to force them in my cellar, and eat the greens, which will be mild tasting because they are growing in the cool and dark. I've potted up dandelion roots too, for the same purpose.
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Re: Wanting less and living more
Cut my frivolous spending by 50% this month. It is still much above what I want but a huge improvement.
I sold some old textbooks last week. Trash picked some stamp albums from the 60s and sold those as well. Used a pair of bed rails as skids so I could roll our defunct dryer up the stairs to be scrapped. (Proud of this bc I am not nearly as strong as I once was but was able to manage.) I did buy a "new" dryer...from the very best thrift store around, where one of the employees makes it his mission to ensure all appliances that go out on the floor are in working condition. So it was $125, and bless that man, it's perfect. The power cord needed to be swapped from my old dryer. I watched about it on YouTube and then did it myself.
The garden is working on two butternut squashes, one large white pumpkin, one small orange pumpkin. There is an exuberant flush of dark purple morning glories growing outside my kitchen window. Blackberries and Sunflowers are flourishing. I have vases filled with green goldenrod and lemon balm all over the house. (Two plants that always need thinning.) The kids can pick enough cherry tomatoes to satisfy themselves every day.
I'm working through a bag of masa harina, trying to use what I have. The best meal so far have been these little corn cakes made with masa, water, and salt, fried in oil and then eaten drenched in maple syrup. They are incredible.
Also in using what I have.... soaking some farro overnight to blend it into batter tomorrow and make more pancakes!
I sold some old textbooks last week. Trash picked some stamp albums from the 60s and sold those as well. Used a pair of bed rails as skids so I could roll our defunct dryer up the stairs to be scrapped. (Proud of this bc I am not nearly as strong as I once was but was able to manage.) I did buy a "new" dryer...from the very best thrift store around, where one of the employees makes it his mission to ensure all appliances that go out on the floor are in working condition. So it was $125, and bless that man, it's perfect. The power cord needed to be swapped from my old dryer. I watched about it on YouTube and then did it myself.
The garden is working on two butternut squashes, one large white pumpkin, one small orange pumpkin. There is an exuberant flush of dark purple morning glories growing outside my kitchen window. Blackberries and Sunflowers are flourishing. I have vases filled with green goldenrod and lemon balm all over the house. (Two plants that always need thinning.) The kids can pick enough cherry tomatoes to satisfy themselves every day.
I'm working through a bag of masa harina, trying to use what I have. The best meal so far have been these little corn cakes made with masa, water, and salt, fried in oil and then eaten drenched in maple syrup. They are incredible.
Also in using what I have.... soaking some farro overnight to blend it into batter tomorrow and make more pancakes!