Thank you so much everyone. I didn’t expect this many responses. I’ll try to think about/respond to as much as I can. This got way longer and way more introspective than I thought it would, I was expecting something more like “take this elective not that”.
But first, thanks to @chenda for making me laugh, I needed it!
chenda wrote: ↑Tue Jan 23, 2024 3:39 pm
I have nothing really to add other than to reiterate all of Henry's points. And don't try and have sex in the library. No one wants to see that when looking for the Kelly's directories.
But, but! It’s on the bucket list!
Thinking about the responses made some things fall into place for me. I started having anxiety issues early last year, which got progressively worse until by November it was interfering massively with my life. That’s also when it started to develop metastases like insomnia. While I was typing out this post, I realised this must have been developing for much longer than I’d thought, because a lot of my actions throughout the last ~3 years (I’m 21) make the most sense if I assume the motive was fear.
chenda wrote: ↑Tue Jan 23, 2024 3:39 pm
And don't ever watch Brideshead Revisited, it will leave you nostalgic for a world you never knew.
I have the book, but haven’t opened it yet
It’s considered a must-read here though.
chenda wrote: ↑Tue Jan 23, 2024 3:39 pm
How did you get a full scholarship? Scholarships weren't even a thing in my day. My memories of undergraduate life were dull and depressing, I didn't even bother to attend my graduation.
The honest answer to that is that there was a lot of random chance + serendipity involved. Having read this forum also helped, because at several points in both interview processes (scholarship, then uni) I reframed interview questions with the tools of systems thinking, and it must have worked. It’s probably also relevant that I have the right combination of national and international academic competitions on my CV.
But really, there was a lot of luck. In early 2022, I applied for a career counselling, and told that counsellor that I’d like to study in the US/UK, but couldn’t afford international/Brexit fees. He said to try scholarships. I came across one I was eligible for, and said “this is not going to work but I’ll regret it for the rest of my life if I don’t try” and it just never went wrong. There are dozens of points where statistically it should have. I did one of my video interviews in the middle of the night, because I was on deployment and it was the only time my ship’s internet connection was good enough for video. I was so sleep-deprived from sea watch that I got the time zone wrong, wondered why no one showed up, went to sleep, then jolted awake with the realisation that I got the time zone wrong, sprinted back, and was only one minute late. For another of the remote tests, both the ship’s internet and my hotspot failed, but a comrade very kindly lent me her phone for several hours. Without her it would have failed there. Then the First Officer signed my request for the German Navy to fly me home to take the in-person entrance exam. There are several more instances like that, but this is probably already a longer response than you were looking for. Also, my sister saved my ass several times, by helping me phrase emails and doing practice interviews and so on.
I’ve been trying to draw lessons from this, and what I came up with was “if you want fortune to act in your favour, you have to give her opportunities to do it”.
It might also be a positive externality of being convinced that you’ll be a complete failure at life unless you always give 100% everywhere, because I would not have tried otherwise. This is also how I’ve tried to manage my anxiety in general, by allowing it to draw my attention to issues I might otherwise ignore, trying to turn them into actionable problems, then addressing them constructively. It’s just, it’s increasingly obvious that I take this way farther than could possibly be healthy.
AxelHeyst wrote: ↑Tue Jan 23, 2024 7:25 pm
I'd have sought mental health counseling.
I was approved by the NHS for weekly high-intensity cognitive-behavioural therapy btw (apparently I meet the criteria for being a severe case : lol : ) and had my second session on Friday.
One of my biggest fears is not making use of opportunities, realising that there’s something I should have done but didn’t. Regret in general. This explains why I’m trying to do so many things at once, I think one of them will be The One Thing That Changes My Life, or where I Meet My True Friends or something like that, and that’s not how it works. This is probably also why I signed up for so much stuff. I feel like I’m standing atop a house of cards that will collapse any minute, but if I never miss a single opportunity I might find out how to postpone it. I’m taking additional maths/econ classes (due to the well-founded fear that I’ve forgotten most high school maths), am doing 2.5 sports competitively (minor league, not varsity… yet) and also do stuff meant to increase social skills, like choir, impro, Nightline,… An outside observer might conclude that I’m trying to self-sabotage by getting to burnout as fast as I can
Btw! I’ve asked the OP question to lots of people. Maybe a future reader of this thread will find this useful:
[same career advisor who told me to apply for the scholarship]
- become a good conversationalist, to learn from peers, TAs, profs, etc
- learn from impressive people
- don’t get stuck in one echo chamber or another
- don’t get sucked into woke activism
- try to have one highly legible accomplishment (rather than lots of small things). If this doesn’t work, grades become more important
[various other people]
- focus on learning, acceptable grades will follow
- don’t let yourself get talked over in tutorials etc by people who have a more aggressive conversation style than you
- it’s your degree and NOT about other people’s expectations
- employers in the UK care more about uni name + final grade, less about individual modules (but they may be relevant for Master’s)
- marathon not a sprint
- don’t fail out >> perfect grades
- avoid sleep deprivation
- have fun
- learn to not be anxiety-driven
About majors, studying abroad,…: Changing courses or taking courses not on the official course list is generally not possible, unless you want to drop out and apply again for a different course. There are extracurricular opportunities for absolutely everything though. PPE also has a pretty broad range of electives, and I plan to take Quantitative Economics next year for statistical literacy, etc.
I intend to start learning Mandarin next academic year, with the current plan being to do a Master’s in China or Taiwan, or finding an alternative way of spending at least six months there, maybe through Teaching English as a Foreign Language/TEFL.
Scott 2 wrote: ↑Tue Jan 23, 2024 2:37 pm
What does a good life look like to you, after university?
Maximizing income might look different than exploring Europe or building deep friendships or a establishing a powerful network or...
I'd start there and work backwards. If you don't know, it's a good place to start asking that question.
Sclass wrote: ↑Wed Jan 24, 2024 9:08 am
YES! look at it backwards. Now.
Regarding why I originally made the decision to come here, it has to do with the many things I’d be interested in that the credential is useful for, but also with how there are so many things I want to learn and it was the logical step to take. I’m currently taking a course in R, for example, but also went to a talk about migration movements in classical period Greece recently, and am learning Spanish and Latin.
I also can’t deny being motivated by the substantial wage premium/increased opportunities for people from my socioeconomic class of origin (this basically disappears in statistics for people with >= upper middle class backgrounds, or who attend non-elite unis, but I’m making the informed choice that I’m in a demographic where it is beneficial.)
Plus, from a general strategy point of view: it’s probably prudent to first aim for success at conventional things/have legible accomplishments, and then do more “alternative” things, because that makes it clear to other people it’s a * choice *. The failure mode of this is keeping all your aims/goals/plans legible to the average person, but that’s not what I mean. I don’t think opting out of all social signalling games is a good idea unless you’re already FI/have some very good reason/…
...I realise that this is not the question you two were asking, and I have trouble giving a coherent response to what you were in fact asking.
I think I want to do intellectual work, e.g. I’ve been working for years on squaring Kant’s theory of ethics with evolutionary psychology, and now I’ve finally described the problem clearly. I also want to figure out what the heck is going on in China politically/economically. Plus some more projects in that vein that I think about every day. If I were forced at gunpoint right now to commit to a career path I’d say I want to work in global priorities. My current very naive plan is to ideally figure out how I can get think tanks and the like to pay me for doing that while I continue to invest the difference between my spending and income. The credential seems very useful for that.
One thing I’ve been using as my overarching plan for years (and also talked about during the application process) is that I want to build the best mental world map I can (see also: global priorities) and I’m collecting puzzle pieces one at a time. This is part of why I stayed in the military longer than I planned and why I want to go to Asia. I’m still not very satisfied with this response to your question though.
This seems to tie in well with what multiple people have said about staying broad/developing transferable skills/working on projects that result in useful skills.
I’m already learning statistics/R, writing (I have lots of writing assignments), am involved at the organising level with several societies, and with stuff that develops social skills.
What are useful and/or transferable skills I should also aim for?
Re: great professors/guest lecturers: I have lots of opportunities for that, but I’ve barely taken advantage of it. I’m updating towards doing that more, and take more advantage of the fact that the environment makes it easy to get exposed to very different people and ideas.
jacob wrote: ↑Wed Jan 24, 2024 7:56 am
If you want to make the most out of university, it's best to know what you want. At least in my time (1994 Denmark) the majority just went because it's what one did if one had the required GPA from HS. I agree with @sou that people go for three reasons, namely either to learn, to start a career, or for the experience (=> mostly "social life").
Looking back, it was clear which path people were on even if they didn't realize it at the time. Also these paths really did out up with different outcomes. None of them bad, just different. Ultimately, I think people just became what they innately were. What's unique about university is that it allows you to be what/who you really are or want to be. Not many places allows this.
To make it interesting,
Bartle's taxonomy describes it well.
The Explorers were there to learn. They studied whatever was interesting them. Changing major. Had hobbies. Their plans after graduation was in effect an afterthought. Most ended up in teaching or as specialists.
The Achievers were there to check off the degree box in order to start a career. They finished everything on time. Studied whatever had the highest expected GPA per effort. Quickly forgot everything they learned and went on to become responsible middle managers in various corporations and businesses.
The Socializers were there to meet new people and "socialize" with them. They went over time, in several cases years, eventually studying whatever would result in a pity-pass. Went on to sales jobs. By far had the best stories and still maintains the best contacts with the crowd.
Frankly, I don't think university is all that different from HS except you now have adult rights and no adult supervision + the average IQ has increased by 10-20 points.
In conclusion, it's not like people are 100% one and 0% the others. There's a distribution. I was 80% Explorer and 20% Socializer. In retrospect, it would have been helpful to have the Achiever component in there even if just being aware of it. For me, that stage of personal development came later in grad school and only lasted a brief while.
I’m at least 50% explorer, with a healthy dose of achiever, and most definitely do not want to end up as a teacher or specialist.
7Wannabe5 wrote: ↑Thu Jan 25, 2024 9:15 am
I would also note that your university experience may depend a lot on where you choose to live.
I’m definitely noticing that too! So far I like the small university town much better than the other cities I’ve lived in. Right now I live in the official accommodation (though by virtue of being >=21 I ended up in the one for mature students, which in retrospect is very fortunate) but I’ll have to “live out” next year. Due to getting diagnosed with celiac disease ~5 months ago, I’m now looking for other celiac/gluten-free people to get a house share with. Kitchens shared with people who eat gluten are now high up in my list of nightmares
I’m 50% optimistic about this, but very open to suggestions!
jacob wrote: ↑Thu Jan 25, 2024 11:49 am
Presuming the particular university has not been decided yet, note that different universities may have different pedagogical strategies. Some prioritize lectures and the student's ability to recite contents of the lecture at oral exams. Some prioritize solving (closed-end) textbook problems and prioritize the ability to do that. Some prioritize (somewhat open-ended) project-based learning and/or the ability to work in a team. This may vary from school to school and from country to country.
The different skill sets obtained are useful in different future roles. They do to a large degree influence or at least select for how the graduates are thinking. This is why the particular choice of school matters. Both in terms of choosing a compatible one but also in terms of which ones employers prefer to hire from for a given job.
I started my degree last fall, but will keep this in mind if I end up doing further study. I think my uni is a mix between these, or it depends on the particular prof/elective? Not very sure though.
Also, I’m open to discussing uni-specific stuff via DM or email if anyone’s interested in that, I’d just prefer to not post my location for the next three years where any random person can read it
Thanks again everyone, this was very helpful!!