On dealing with rumors?
Re: On dealing with rumors?
Same is true for being absent-minded to the point of complete self-absorption.
Re: On dealing with rumors?
IMHO, rumors are a reflection of the image you're presenting to others. By studying the mirror rather than ignoring it, you can learn a lot about yourself.
If the rumors are true, then own them. Sunlight is the best disinfectant. If you're ashamed to own them, then consider why that is and whether living a lie is sustainable. And if the rumors are not true, then stop for a moment and consider what you have done to make people think that about you. A lot of that comes down to emotional intelligence. Perhaps there are some simple steps you can take to present yourself in a way less likely to incite rumors.
Basically, be yourself while remaining thoughtful of others and you'll largely immunize yourself to rumors. But live a secret life while ignoring how you affect the people around you, and things could get ugly.
If the rumors are true, then own them. Sunlight is the best disinfectant. If you're ashamed to own them, then consider why that is and whether living a lie is sustainable. And if the rumors are not true, then stop for a moment and consider what you have done to make people think that about you. A lot of that comes down to emotional intelligence. Perhaps there are some simple steps you can take to present yourself in a way less likely to incite rumors.
Basically, be yourself while remaining thoughtful of others and you'll largely immunize yourself to rumors. But live a secret life while ignoring how you affect the people around you, and things could get ugly.
Re: On dealing with rumors?
Smile. Let is slide. Being defensive will make you look weak, which will in turn make you more of a prey. +1 to humor.
Some Epictetus: If anyone tells you that such a person speaks ill of you, don't make excuses about what is said of you, but answer: "He does not know my other faults, else he would not have mentioned only these."
As for how to manage the internal side of it, here is some more Epictetus for you:
"In general, remember that it is we who torment, we who make difficulties for ourselves – that is, our opinions do. What, for instance, does it mean to be insulted? Stand by a rock and insult it, and what have you accomplished? If someone responds to insult like a rock, what has the abuser gained with his invective? If, however, he has his victim’s weakness to exploit, then his efforts are worth his while."
Some Epictetus: If anyone tells you that such a person speaks ill of you, don't make excuses about what is said of you, but answer: "He does not know my other faults, else he would not have mentioned only these."
As for how to manage the internal side of it, here is some more Epictetus for you:
"In general, remember that it is we who torment, we who make difficulties for ourselves – that is, our opinions do. What, for instance, does it mean to be insulted? Stand by a rock and insult it, and what have you accomplished? If someone responds to insult like a rock, what has the abuser gained with his invective? If, however, he has his victim’s weakness to exploit, then his efforts are worth his while."
Re: On dealing with rumors?
Epictetus is really helpful, especially since his lot in life was as a slave.
Yeah, I just learned all I could and cut the people and their friends out of my life. The truth is I barely remember people from my high school, and I'll only be staying in touch with ~10 people I met while at college.
The biggest lesson seems to be more prudence with the public sphere - to let people earn the trust required for the inner part of the onion, especially since most of my identities are controversial and very easily misunderstood. It's also taught me to latch on the people that are non-judgmental/kind themselves.
Yeah, I just learned all I could and cut the people and their friends out of my life. The truth is I barely remember people from my high school, and I'll only be staying in touch with ~10 people I met while at college.
The biggest lesson seems to be more prudence with the public sphere - to let people earn the trust required for the inner part of the onion, especially since most of my identities are controversial and very easily misunderstood. It's also taught me to latch on the people that are non-judgmental/kind themselves.
Re: On dealing with rumors?
most of brute's identities are also controversial.
Re: On dealing with rumors?
sentient computers have rights too !
#<3brute
#<3brute
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Re: On dealing with rumors?
Do like Bonnie Raitt: "Let's give 'em something to talk about!"
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Re: On dealing with rumors?
my GF and I believe in not gossiping...
how bout u guys?
:O)
how bout u guys?
:O)
Re: On dealing with rumors?
yeah sounds like high school to be honest. I wouldn't worry about it in the slightest.
Re: On dealing with rumors?
Dear Goddess, bless us such that we may give up small talk and speak like heroes among men!mollyhendrix wrote: ↑Sat Dec 09, 2017 6:03 pmmy GF and I believe in not gossiping...
how bout u guys?
~Medha Sukta (hymn) of the Rig Veda.
Chamunda helps a person manage tale bearing ie. Rumour spreaders, fear mongerers, slanderers and the like.
Matrikas represent mental qualities which are counterintuitive when obsessed over. Each Matrika (matriarch) is a form of the Divine Feminine who has conquered Her corresponding mental quality. Contemplating Her form helps deal with that corresponding mental quality.
The Upanishad wrote:With our ears may we hear what is good.
With our eyes may we behold Thy righteousness.
Tranquil in body and mind, may we who worship Thee find rest.
OM Shanti Shanti Shanti
OM . . . Hail the supreme Self!
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Re: On dealing with rumors?
@fiby what’s up with all the hindu(?) pics in your last several posts? Is that new? Not that I’ve done an exhaustive search of all your posts, but it feels kinda new.
Re: On dealing with rumors?
@suomalaninen- He lives in India.
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Re: On dealing with rumors?
@animal, no I figured he has some connection to Hinduism, but I'd never seen a post from him before with explicit references (and pictures) and I saw like 2 or 3 in the last day or so. Just curious if there was a genesis for the posts, like finding a renewed interest or just having read a new book or something like that.