The Art of Not Being Governed
Posted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 11:52 am
That is the question that I am embarking on answering. It is an interesting time in my life and a difficult time in my marriage. Mine has been a very old fashioned one - one joint bank account, one credit card per household, no debt of any kind. It's not working anymore.
I've been working in healthcare for many years, became quite disenchanted with it and in 2014 switched to a per diem status. Over time my hours dwindled to next to nothing. I volunteered at my daughter's school, volunteered at a learning farm, and took some real estate classes. I read a lot and stumbled upon Jacob's book. I loved the idea; DH - not so much. As I was experimenting with DIY laundry detergents and making my own cheese DH developed a penchant for Gruyere and became pretty good at downhill skiing. He also embarked on the pursuit of perfect - a perfect garage door instead of a perfectly functional one, a perfect dining set instead of a perfectly functional one, a perfect couch instead of a functional one. We both rigorously engaged in the Pygmalion Project with him "inspecting" me a lot and saying things like, "Even when turning on the dishwasher you just can't choose the Normal cycle " and me sprinkling my speech with phrases like "a cubical farm" and "corporate slaves" way too liberally.
Then it dawned on me (I am not as stupid as I look ), that it's not independence if it depends on convincing someone. Thus, in January I made arrangements at work to have more hours, opened my own bank account with my pay check going there, and got my separate cc. I should have done it in 1996, but oh well... I don't want separate finances, but I do want a separate score card, the one that makes sense to me.
There are not that many categories that I've been able to separate from the rest of the household. I remember these categories by the acronym GET. Here is my January score card.
I got my first paycheck of $1, 729.64 and spent $410.65 in the following manner:
Girl's Stuff - $105.45
Hair Salon - $100
Tampons - $5.45
Education & Entertainment - $173.61
Book Personal Village by Marvin Thomas (used was not available )
Gifts for 2 bd parties - $125
Checks that came with the checking account - $25.95 ( What??? I didn't know they were not free with the account. Now I do - education
Transportation - $139.59
Gas - $139.59 (suburban mom )
My next step will be somehow investing that money if you can even call this investing for such a trivial sum. I am quite clueless there. I'll make it up as I go.
I've been working in healthcare for many years, became quite disenchanted with it and in 2014 switched to a per diem status. Over time my hours dwindled to next to nothing. I volunteered at my daughter's school, volunteered at a learning farm, and took some real estate classes. I read a lot and stumbled upon Jacob's book. I loved the idea; DH - not so much. As I was experimenting with DIY laundry detergents and making my own cheese DH developed a penchant for Gruyere and became pretty good at downhill skiing. He also embarked on the pursuit of perfect - a perfect garage door instead of a perfectly functional one, a perfect dining set instead of a perfectly functional one, a perfect couch instead of a functional one. We both rigorously engaged in the Pygmalion Project with him "inspecting" me a lot and saying things like, "Even when turning on the dishwasher you just can't choose the Normal cycle " and me sprinkling my speech with phrases like "a cubical farm" and "corporate slaves" way too liberally.
Then it dawned on me (I am not as stupid as I look ), that it's not independence if it depends on convincing someone. Thus, in January I made arrangements at work to have more hours, opened my own bank account with my pay check going there, and got my separate cc. I should have done it in 1996, but oh well... I don't want separate finances, but I do want a separate score card, the one that makes sense to me.
There are not that many categories that I've been able to separate from the rest of the household. I remember these categories by the acronym GET. Here is my January score card.
I got my first paycheck of $1, 729.64 and spent $410.65 in the following manner:
Girl's Stuff - $105.45
Hair Salon - $100
Tampons - $5.45
Education & Entertainment - $173.61
Book Personal Village by Marvin Thomas (used was not available )
Gifts for 2 bd parties - $125
Checks that came with the checking account - $25.95 ( What??? I didn't know they were not free with the account. Now I do - education
Transportation - $139.59
Gas - $139.59 (suburban mom )
My next step will be somehow investing that money if you can even call this investing for such a trivial sum. I am quite clueless there. I'll make it up as I go.