Lemur Journal!

Where are you and where are you going?
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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

Eventually you reach a boiling point in these corporate/consulting jobs and no amount of philosophizing, rationalizing, meditation or what have you can solve the problem.

Today a few final nails in the coffin and that is all she wrote. Funny I had a long rant typed out but there is really no point to the post. Me complaining doesn't solve anything. I've done that enough in my journal previously. I finally decided what I am going to do.

1.) Keep doing my best anyway, remain professional, and ride it out the best I can. If I get fired in the meantime at least my chains will be off.
2.) In the meantime, I started applying for other work (I've 7 applications submitted :)) All of them government jobs because that is where my niche is and it is not about the money anymore. I am seeking lower stress and better benefits. Pay cut can be up to 30%. Anymore cut then that and my Spouse will think I've gone crazy. I can at least justify not too much of a cut. The ones I applied for are remote and have flex-schedule (meaning 4 10s or 4 9s with every other Friday off).

Ultimately this project I am leading is destined to fail (a matter of when not if) and it is going to be someone else's problem one day. It would be a nice Christmas present to know by end of year if I'm getting lucky with the application processes.

That is all. My aim was to be with this employer for 3 years. I am at 2 years...10 months or something. Close enough. I spent all of 2021 with existential crises and growing mental health issues from maintaining performance. It just is not doable anymore.

Why suffer when net-worth is at something like 20x expenses??? I want to cruise out this finish line. :D

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mountainFrugal
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by mountainFrugal »

Having done a similar thing last year (much less pay for much less stress), it was completely worth it. Surprisingly, the reduced stress/commitment allowed me to have more time to upgrade my cooking from scratch skills (and others) leading to significantly reduced food spending. So even though there was large hit to my salary, the time and mental energy for skill development made up the difference on the cost side of the equation. Hang in there and good luck Lemur!

Western Red Cedar
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Western Red Cedar »

Congrats on taking the step in a less toxic direction. There is a high demand in the public sector so I think you'll probably find something relatively soon if you are open to leaving. One thing I love about working in the public sector is that I generally feel really good about what I do, and I'm surrounded by hundreds of other committed professionals trying to make a positive contribution to society. Sometimes I wish more people in the FIRE world would consider public service.

Are you and your spouse on the same page regarding a career transition? If not, I'd probably have a long conversation this weekend to make sure she understands and supports your next move.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

@mountainFrugal Thank you. Hoping it works out soon but if there are some delays for a few months that might be okay. I just need to do what I have to do to survive on a day to day or week to week basis. There is actually money I would be leaving on the table if I left right now at this very moment but also if I was offered the government jobs tomorrow, I would take it in a heartbeat even after clearing my head and settling down for the past few days. My mind has been officially made up :lol:

@WesternRedCedar

From the very first post in my journal when I wasn't at 6 figure net-worth yet, my mindset was almost 100% salary focused and that I needed to do whatever I needed to do to grow personally/professionally and do whatever it takes to save money and invest. It did not matter necessarily what I felt about work or whether it was my passion or what have you. I only aligned some things I'm naturally good at with work so I had a chance of being a subject-matter expert or competent.

I gotta say I don't regret the path I took - I nearly doubled my salary from $55k to $90k and now just over six figures in the past 2-3 years or so and at the same time my spouse's business kicked off and she saves almost all her money as well and invests. We really grinded it out like "power couple."

But now I'm starting to see the mental costs to this adding up in the form of occupational burnout. Not always a 1:1 relationship, but typically as salary goes up, so does responsibilities, occupational politics, work expectations, hours put in, stress, etc...The good news is when your net-worth really starts approaching the holy grail #s for 25x+ expenses, it makes you wonder if you even need to put up with this crap anymore. So many options open up.

Like sure...putting up with it is the optimal thing to do to make it to 25x-33x. But life is not so simple. And lately I've started to notice physical effects that I've not had before - insomnia, gray hairs, chest pains and stomach pains. Weird for a guy who is skinny and 30. That also sort of hit the :idea: for me that sometimes the best way to deal with stress is to just remove the stressor. I am sometimes a glutton for punishment and I will go to great lengths to not feel like a quitter - but I'm thinking this mentality in itself can be toxic...I am trying to come to terms with it and take solace in what I've achieved so far but I'm at my mental limits. And honestly, I think in a theoretical world where I could take a year off and come back to the same responsibilities - I would be fine. But this has been a multi-year thing that I think has really added up and I 've to do what is best for my mental health.
Are you and your spouse on the same page regarding a career transition?
So regarding this, I think this is where things get a little interesting in my personal life. She has made reference to me "being like a bird without wings." - a proverb from her country. Meaning someone with no ambition which I believe is absolutely ridiculous. I just don't have much ambition for career related things anymore. That part from my soul is just dead right now. The first time I broached the subject, I was immediately shut out with 'deal with it, you always stress anyway, just rest, etc." A wall was up. This is not to say my Spouse is not empathetic - she is very mentally tough :lol: . It is a "third world mentality." And she has seen me have these phases before where I rant, want to rest, and then I come back stronger after having figured out how to deal with some occupation obstacle. She probably thinks this is a similar thing.

But my Spouse is coming around I think after a few conversations - perhaps realizing this isn't the normal Mr. Lemur stress. Like much closer to a crises situation. She is still a bit fearful and not 100% backing my decisions here deep down. Ultimately, I feel she will come around if she sees me happier, has more PTO, less stress, etc...but it won't be easy from her perspective. The only compromise I feel I can make in the short-term is just to not take too much of a pay-cut. If the paycut is only 20% or so but I get more PTO and less stress - I can easily describe this as a wash. It would be a real wtf moment if the grass does not end up being greener and I make less money doing so. :? In any case, whenever I let her know about so and so job I just applied for - the only response I get is "okay what is the salary?"

Long-term I did some things right - I built a vision with my Spouse for FIRE but "ERE" has been a much tougher sell. My Spouse has monetary ambitions that go beyond me and my visions now. And I've come to terms with that. I can't fault her so I gotta work within this system the best I can. We're in this boat together so I won't do anything to sink the ship but I also will be willing to divert routes at this point if it means I don't hit an iceberg. Eventually a so be it situation arises.

shaz
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by shaz »

Sorry to hear work is negatively impacting your health! Can you afford to take the pressure off yourself at work while you look for something else? All they can really do is fire you and it sounds like you have enough money saved up to be OK if that happens.

Generally when I have gotten stressed at work it has been me doing it to myself. Other people can ask you to do things, they can tell you to do things, they can play bullshit dominance games or whatever, but if you don't play along and you only do things that are reasonable then the worst they can do is fire you. If you aren't worried about being fired then you can say no to ridiculous demands and you can ignore other people's drama. You just have to remember to do it and not get caught up in someone else's reality.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

Thanks Shaz.

Unfortunately pressure cannot be unloaded due to lack of resources; however, I do have PTO/Holidays for 16 days in a row coming up after this week. And my laptop is shut off. No one can reach me. I'm looking forward to that - whenever I've this time off I really enjoy it. I've so much to look forward too. Nothing is rushed. Its slow. Its nice...

A lot of my stress is in my own head and the way I respond to stressors. Long post deleted anyway. It was nice to write out but ultimately does not really help me long-term. I gotta get out of the job rant mentality - it is not useful. And my depression/stress from job I am now realizing really bleeds too much into my personal life and effects the relationships I've with those around me - I am not present mentally with them like I should be. I am ashamed of that.

Rest will be good. That is a short-term solution. But long term, I have to change the environment. I've 7 applications in so hopefully will hear some things by end of year; otherwise, the plan is to put in for at least 1 job a week.

shaz
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by shaz »

A lot of my stress is in my own head and the way I respond to stressors.
That's part of what I was trying to say. You may as well work on mental tools to help you with that while you look for a new job because you are going to take yourself with you to any new job.

Here is an exercise that helps some people. Let's say you feel like you can't take your lunch break and go for a nice walk while you eat the lunch you packed. Ask yourself, "What happens if I take this break?"

So maybe the answer is, "I will fall further behind on my project." Well that isn't life threatening, even though your body is making lots of cortisol and acting like it is life threatening. Now ask, "OK so then what?"

Maybe the answer is, "I will have to turn in a report that says I am falling behind." Still not life threatening. "Then what?" "My manager will be angry and I will have a very uncomfortable supervisory meeting where they pressure me to do more." Still not life threatening. "Then what?" "I will get a bad performance review." And so on until the answer is, "I will get fired." Which we have already established is acceptable because you have FU money.

If the answer is never, "someone dies" take the break, go for a nice walk, and enjoy your lunch outside. If you are an air traffic controller and the answer is lots of people die, then find a new job quickly!

ThriftyRob
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by ThriftyRob »

@Lemur - kudos to you for analysing your situation and options in what appears to be an objective and dispassionate way. I hope your break works for you and that you switch off from thinking about your work issues during that break. When I've been in stressful work situations I attempted physical activity and also mindfulness/meditation, which had some effect, but the most useful was taking myself out of the stressing situation completely. I support @Shaz's comments about taking breaks and also to get sufficient rest. I think in modern times it's okay to declare concerns about one's mental health in the workplace to supervisors/managers, especially when one isn't focussed on building a career with that employer – what's the worst thing that could happen?

white belt
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by white belt »

Lemur wrote:
Sun Dec 12, 2021 1:18 pm
So regarding this, I think this is where things get a little interesting in my personal life. She has made reference to me "being like a bird without wings." - a proverb from her country. Meaning someone with no ambition which I believe is absolutely ridiculous. I just don't have much ambition for career related things anymore. That part from my soul is just dead right now. The first time I broached the subject, I was immediately shut out with 'deal with it, you always stress anyway, just rest, etc." A wall was up. This is not to say my Spouse is not empathetic - she is very mentally tough :lol: . It is a "third world mentality." And she has seen me have these phases before where I rant, want to rest, and then I come back stronger after having figured out how to deal with some occupation obstacle. She probably thinks this is a similar thing.

But my Spouse is coming around I think after a few conversations - perhaps realizing this isn't the normal Mr. Lemur stress. Like much closer to a crises situation. She is still a bit fearful and not 100% backing my decisions here deep down. Ultimately, I feel she will come around if she sees me happier, has more PTO, less stress, etc...but it won't be easy from her perspective. The only compromise I feel I can make in the short-term is just to not take too much of a pay-cut. If the paycut is only 20% or so but I get more PTO and less stress - I can easily describe this as a wash. It would be a real wtf moment if the grass does not end up being greener and I make less money doing so. :? In any case, whenever I let her know about so and so job I just applied for - the only response I get is "okay what is the salary?"

Long-term I did some things right - I built a vision with my Spouse for FIRE but "ERE" has been a much tougher sell. My Spouse has monetary ambitions that go beyond me and my visions now. And I've come to terms with that. I can't fault her so I gotta work within this system the best I can. We're in this boat together so I won't do anything to sink the ship but I also will be willing to divert routes at this point if it means I don't hit an iceberg. Eventually a so be it situation arises.
Do you feel like you have a strong individual vision for freedom-to? What about a shared vision? I get the feeling that a freedom-from vision is not going to resonate with your spouse. Maybe you've already done this, but I think it's helpful to read into some of the MBTI/Enneagram/Spiral Dynamics/Kegan stuff to try to accurately gauge where your spouse fits into the various frameworks. This might help you to wargame possible approaches that will appeal to your spouse. It seems like saying you want more time to relax and pursue hobbies isn't going to cut it.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

@Shaz

Yes. Mental tools is something I need to work on. During my break, I will do some more research into dealing with stresses brought on by product development and corporate politics. Maybe some self CBT. I may as well learn how to navigate these particular games better as opposed to calling the games bullshit and being stressed about it anyway. I don't necessarily have to win the game but don't want to be a completely dead player either. I also have a history of catastrophizing but I need to break down my individuals worries into actual buckets of reality...For instance, I've done a few tasks (for examples - emails and outreach to managers/customers where I was skeptical of feedback) and took some chances on things. Thinking to myself with each task what is the worse that can happen with these actions/situations and does it matter?

Like recently, I put up a red flag that there is no way we can hit a certain milestone by December 31. This worried me quite a bit. The worst case was - customer would be super pissed we missed it again, they will contact my client, and I'll be in some zoom jail. BTW - this has never actually happened but I've always feared it. The best case was they didn't care at all, said take your time, and do what we've to do to fix issues. Both fantasies. The reality was they said okay thanks for letting us know, we're disappointed but is there anything we can do to help? This particular milestone still a problem for various reasons I can't get into but your post helped me have a realistic perspective on dealing with situations like these. Just need to practice I take it.

@Thirftyrob

I don't have much of a relationship with my managers. I'm very independent on my product. Maybe that is part of the problem - being on an island. So there is a constant feeling of uncertainty. I requested feedback from them recently to talk through some things - normally I don't outreach either but I took the @shaz school of thought here and decided to do so. What is the worse that can happen anyway? Also yes - main objective is to still remove the stressor :lol: . I'm up to 8 applications. But Shaz is right - I bring myself to the next job and now I can recall - I've never truly been happy at jobs before and it is mostly because of my own head.

@WhiteBelt

I've to dig deeper into my own value system as well as my Spouse's and compare the two. Spiral Dynamics sure is interesting. I've only read it occasionally on the boards and I don't know where I fall on this...maybe a yellow or an orange? Better if someone else identifies lol and take what I say here with a grain of salt as I'm not deep into SD but I think judging my original take could tell a lot about my own value system:

If it helps, I've always viewed red as a bunch of bandits. Sorry guys/gals. Green I can admire but feel they're ultimately too idealistic .... like I feel they don't understand these bandits exist and good luck being in harmony with them. I don't believe that reds should be dealt with in any kind of authoritarian way - quite the opposite, we just have to integrate their tendencies to work for everyone. I can empathize why reds are the way they're. Its self-preservation at its core. Purples/Blues - fine if that is what your culture is, I won't argue with it but don't impose on me.... Nice to know things are orderly I guess...I think red is right here when things really are chaos.

Freedom-To: Yes. That vision is strong. I am pretty much dictionary definition of an epicurean and I've no problem when I've tons of time to myself to be completely autonomous. I can even embrace boredom. There is a lot of hobbies I want to practice and personal intrinsic motivations I want to pursue.

Shared Vision: Probably not so strong anymore. I felt we did at one time but I think the FI portion resonated much more then the RE portion for my Spouse. With my Spouse, the opposite of me is happening. Whereas I'm teetering on the edge of moving to post-consumerism thought and life, I feel like the goal posts keep moving financially in the other direction for my Spouse in the form of ever increasing levels of financial securities and maybe some 'want's'... I think you're right - freedom-from is not for my Spouse. In fact, now that I really think about it, she really is not the type to ever fully quit work. And if her business failed at any point, I think she will find something else to drive her. Money is the main metric always. Why? Well several reasons I think of off the top of my head when I try to put myself in my Spouse's shoes...

1.) Her business runs well. She has no boss. Profits and saves money. She does straight B2B and doesn't have to deal with customers anymore. This is an awesome situation to have. Freedom from what exactly? Comments - I will keep this niche running as long as I can until I can't anymore. To my Spouse - work is performing one's duty. I've argued about what duty constitutes before but that conversation dies. I'm the crazy one lol. :ugeek:

2.) She is selfless person, donates, and is very family oriented - she sends money to home with funds from business. Maybe she is a purple type or a blue type. Also this is an Asian culture kind of thing. Work to my Spouse is a way to do her part here.

3.) My Spouse is a very socially cognizant person / traditional. Comments before include - you can't retire and not work because you're too young and you're the man of the house and supposed to be working. How would you explain to people that you're retired? Ugh...I'll just say I'm a consultant or something. Spouse: :roll: It is true though - I am an actual consultant and I never once had to elaborate on what that is exactly haha.

4.) A few other things to wrap up - She envisions traveling and seeing the world one day. A different type of hedonism I guess. Should I quit fulltime work right now we won't have the funds for that. Also she wants her own house one day before there is any kind of talk of me quitting work. Can't blame her here - I want my own place too but its hard to beat the deal we have going now so that is on indefinite pause. Also the proverbial what about health insurance and/or medical emergency?

shaz
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by shaz »

@Lemur that's great you were able to test out "what's the worst that could happen" and the worst didn't happen. I'm looking forward to seeing you develop ninja-level skill at shrugging off work-related stress.

I hope you're able to come up with a new shared vision for the future with your spouse.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

The break has been nice. I feel relaxed. Another 9-10 days or so. Investments are up. I am also in the running for one of the jobs I applied for.

I put on some holiday weight but don't particularly care at this moment. Some of it might even be muscle. But I am dropping this idea of 'dieting' for now and returned to a focus on lifestyle changes. I also returned to some of my roots and I've gotten back into a eating regime (150-160 grams of protein per day) and strength/hypertrophy program (training with progressive overload). To no surprise, eating a much higher protein intake leads to less intake of junk foods...satiety is at full strength.

I've been exercising these past few months on and off with pushups, core work, pull-ups, and occasional jogs but now I am in a set routine with a notebook to really track exercises and metrics with goals to improve. Enough research shows that calisthenics can be taken pretty far (for instance panache push-ups). I'm looking forward to this growth. Progressive overload is key otherwise progress can not be made. Eventually I will graduate to weights. No gym membership. Quick math shows for my case it is much more frugal in the long run to acquire equipment in an opportunistic fashion as opposed to a gym membership and a 22 mile round-trip commute per workout.

Speaking of mental tools - I've done some reading here. Thanks Shaz again for the simple trick you provided. I really found that helpful to sort of snap me out of catastrophizing and back into reality when I'm in these stressful moments. I also really like what I'm reading from Andrew D. Huberman. There is a common theme of using behavior to set thoughts/feelings rather then having thoughts/feelings drive the behavior. Also increasing stress thresholds can be done through deliberate practice & mindfulness / mediation , old school exposure therapy, and even things like cold showers could have a benefit. Funny enough I tried a cold shower yesterday and I made it to about 20 seconds and about panicked for some reason and jumped out lol. Felt great afterwards though. What I read was to not alternate between hot/cold but just go straight to cold and let your body warm itself up for maximum benefit. These things are obvious and clear after one has had rest and is getting a break from the burnout. Its nice to feel recovered.

My Spouse visits her country soon and will be out for a month. Just me and the son. Edit: Not...flight was cancelled due to travel restrictions related to Omicron.

Here's to 2022. Happy Holidays Everyone.
Last edited by Lemur on Sun Dec 26, 2021 1:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.

shaz
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by shaz »

The cold shower thing is interesting. Cold showers sound horrid but I can see the logic of why they might work for the same reason exercise does - give your body's stress system an actual task that has a definite end. I will add it to my list of tools in case I start stressing and nothing else works.

Best wishes for a safe, healthy, happy, and successful New Year.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

Thanks Shaz. Today I did about a 9 minute cold shower via stop watch. Beating my previous record of 20 seconds lol. I was only aiming for 5 minutes or so but it does feel good after a few minutes.

Yes - the best way to describe this experience was horrid...but it did feel great after it was over. 30 minutes later though and I am still shivering slightly even with a blanket on. umm...I think I induced a little hypothermia :lol: This should be nice for some calorie burning.

This video was very relatable:
https://youtu.be/Gb0h8ZKvJW4

Basically, after having the experience, I can see how this might work for stress/anxiety therapy.

1.) The mental pain associated with anxiety is almost always the anticipatory feelings of an uncomfortable event. Same with a cold shower. You do more thinking about it then actually doing it before you step in. Today I let the cold water hit my feet for about a minute or so while I was shivering heavily. I had to deal with these feelings of "why am I doing this? And "This is pointless....what is the point of this" also sets in. Just like in life, these have to be dealt with. Eventually I did a count of 3...No a count of 5! And then I dived in.

2.) Just like a really stressful event, the first minute or so is always the worst. With a cold shower, the first minute or 2 is convulsing, shivering, cursing. Panic does set in a fight or flight sort of way. Yesterday, I decided to flee. Today I flexed and was like bring it on!!! I believe this exact switched happened when I started focusing on controlling my breathing and when the worst was over - oddly enough you start getting real numb to the point that the pain starts subsiding. Eventually you get into some flow and you start dealing with the problem in the form of action. I had some bouts in there where I wasn't even shivering and just sort of calm and letting what feels like a bunch of dull needles bouncing off me.

Will keep this practice up. Tomorrow I want to practice diving straight in and not letting it just hit my feet first. I do wonder if I can get to a point where I don't even have the anticipatory feelings and I just walk straight into the abyss without a thought. Maybe this will never be possible? You just get better at dealing with it....Just like in life.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

Progressive Overload Training without conventional weightlifting equipment:


I am finding that one can go very far with body calisthenics alone. Eventually you'll need to get conventional weights I believe but for those like me that are waiting on frugal opportunities for weights, I can put together something that can take me along a journey for a while without weights. It is good functional foundation as well.

Strength/Hypertrophy can only occur when a person satisfies a few conditions:

1.) Adequate Protein Intake for cell tissue synthesis. General rule of thumb is 0.8 grams of protein per pound of bodyweight or 1 gram of protein per pound of lean body tissue. Both are roughly equal. A slight caloric excess is also a tailwind that can help but beginners have a short window where they can add muscle / lose fat at the same time for a few months.
2.) Adequate sleep & rest for recovery. Just like how the brain consolidates memory at rest, so do the muscles do most of their growing.
3.) Progressive overload training to induce stimulus (muscles need a reason to grow). You need a decent intensity. One where at minimum you can do 3 sets of 5 and if you can do 3 sets of 8 or more, you should find a way to increase intensity. Don't just have a repetition focus because that will only condition you for endurance.
4.) Periodic de-loads to avoid overtraining

Here is just a few things I found but the world is bigger then I thought it was. Check out the recommended routine on reddit bodyweight fitness for some ideas.

Chest: Planche Pushups https://youtu.be/TZ63httkob4 . Basically use a measuring tape, spot hand position, and get further and further from the wall as you progress. As with all bodyweight calisthenics, keep form disciplined.

Back: Pull/ups and Chin-ups. Add a weighted vest or weighted backpack as you get stronger.

Legs: Shrimp Squats https://youtu.be/xfl7SDj0Gzs . This one was humbling as I am only at the first progression. I do not have the strength/coordination yet to go further. This is great too; this shattered the idea that I had to have a barbell for weighted squats - I can progress on this one for quite a while.

Abs: Dragonflys, Reverse Crunches, Leveraged Planks (feet up on table). Progress with more time. Eventually I think you'll need to graduate to some form of weighted decline sit-up. Planks are good for an isometric hold and is an exercise especially for those with lower back issues so you don't have flexion.

Blackjack
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Blackjack »

I'm gonna try and expand a bit on where you are at, as I think you are making a good effort here and want to try and help if I can. What are you doing for splits here? 2 upper body days per week, 2 lower body days per week? And what are your end goals for fitness? What end goals would make you content with where you end up (at least now, where you are starting from)?
Lemur wrote:
Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:59 pm
I am finding that one can go very far with body calisthenics alone. Eventually you'll need to get conventional weights I believe but for those like me that are waiting on frugal opportunities for weights, I can put together something that can take me along a journey for a while without weights. It is good functional foundation as well.
Agreed. Using both approaches is obviously the most conducive to long term health and strength, but you can start making a good amount of progress with very very little equipment.
Lemur wrote:
Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:59 pm
Chest: Planche Pushups https://youtu.be/TZ63httkob4 . Basically use a measuring tape, spot hand position, and get further and further from the wall as you progress. As with all bodyweight calisthenics, keep form disciplined.
Planche pushups are beast mode. If you have one, you are a god of biceps and chest and core strength.... BUT, they are completely based completely on body type. Pretty much nobody over 6' tall can get them. If you are over 5'8", you are pretty much a god if you can obtain a straddle planche at all. Shout out to any abolute legends who can (I think there is a video of Roye Goldschmidt doing this somewhere on his instagram, but I don't have an account anymore to find it). If you are shorter, yeah go for it! But this is a high skill gymnastics move. You need to be getting feedback on form to make much progression at it, and the progression through planche is very slow (most people won't have this after 5+ years of dedicated training even, this is one of those several thousand hours of effort skills). Take videos of your workouts, and take a look at your form to try to cue yourself in certain areas. You can make more progress if you do this for several sets, correcting as you go, then take notes for immedate cueing of next time you train it.

For most normal humans, dips should suffice as the chest builder, and loading up to 5-6 sets of 5-8 reps of dips weighted with 80% of your bodyweight is a much easier (and much more consistent) way to get very strong. Version 0 (before dips with a band), would be working up the dumbbell shoulder press to 25% of your bodyweight for 5-8 reps with a 1 second hold at the top. If you don't have weights, get yourself some rings. Work to doing ring pushups (or using anything else you can grip and get your chest lower than your hands) where you can get your hands deeper than your chest from standing until parallel with the floor with feet slightly raised off the ground, then move to the dips with band assistance.

Lemur wrote:
Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:59 pm
Back: Pull/ups and Chin-ups. Add a weighted vest or weighted backpack as you get stronger.
Yessir. Touch your chest to the bar on every rep. It might take you a little bit to build up to that range of motion, and that's okay. Don't be afraid to use bands at the beginning to keep the reps high enough, and the form good enough. With these guys, start at 5 sets of 4 reps (when you can), and build up to 5-6 sets of 8 reps, then move of the chain of workout intensity. If you don't have one chin up yet, jump to the top of the rep, hold for 3, then slowly lower yourself through the eccentric of the pullup (5 seconds or longer). Do those for 5-8 reps if you can. If you need to, use a band for assistance.

The calisthenics / gymnastics version is you move towards the one arm variations as you get stronger, but again please don't try to get a one arm chin without proper form instruction and help, and be ready to have the worst DOMS of your life (can't even get out of bed really) when you start shifting to these.

There is a second in-between the chins and the one arm chin in the muscle-up. I find this to be the general crowning achievement of ability for the normal person. Get good enough at pulling and good enough at pushing to be able to finish 5x5 ring muscle ups (or bar if you only have one of those available, they are just harder) and you too can feel like the king of the world. It is achievable for many in only a couple years of training, and its so satisfying to be able to just rep them out when you have some rings lying around.

Lemur wrote:
Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:59 pm
Legs: Shrimp Squats https://youtu.be/xfl7SDj0Gzs . This one was humbling as I am only at the first progression. I do not have the strength/coordination yet to go further. This is great too; this shattered the idea that I had to have a barbell for weighted squats - I can progress on this one for quite a while.
I love shrimp squats. Obviously one exercise does not a lower body make, but this one is pretty great. I think a shortcoming in working on the shrimp alone is that there are some things which are gonna impede progress that aren't directly worked by the shrimp squat. Ankle mobility would be a pretty big one here, as well as spinal erectors, and hip abductors and adductors. I think that if you are too weak in one of these areas it might hinder progress in the movement here itself, and lead to frustration. So just take videos of yourself and note form deficiencies, then dig into ways you can make these parts of your body stronger / less tight / etc. The couch stretch is something that nearly everyone needs these days, it might be a good warmup before attempting the shrimps to help loosen your legs up.

I'm happy to discuss anything with you or why I feel one way or another about something, or what might consist of a well thought out and implemented routine for x or y or z. I'm maybe an intermediate in much of this stuff (3-5k hours of total practice, much less in any single skill), so I come in with a bias of where I am at myself too.

shaz
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by shaz »

You just made cold showers sound even worse than I imagined! I have crossed them off my mental list of things I might try someday. Just nope.

Those are some interesting variations for bodyweight exercises. You might consider adding lunges to your program. Every strength coach I ever worked with has been mad for lunges - front lunges, walking lunges, lateral lunges, back lunges. I'm very quad dominant, which is probably why I need lunges in my program. If you are hitting squats hard then they could help you balance things out, too.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

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@BlackJack

I am doing full-body 3x a week. Research tells me this is the most efficient for a beginner since progress stems from "beginner / newbie gains" and I can get in 156 workouts in a year. My first goal is to put on strength/mass so I am aiming to add 0.5-1lb of bodyweight per week. My diet has been simplified to create habits - mainly aiming to hit my protein target daily and check the scale once a week. If weight gain is too much outside this range, I'll need to add more walking + jogging and/or dial back carb/fat sources. I don't know exactly how much weight I want to put on yet but it needs to be enough where I've something to cut down to after the mass gain phase is complete. End goal is to defeat my arch nemesis - the skinny-fat look lol. Some source say to cut first then bulk but since I already lean more towards the skinny side I decided to gain first. I've not set weight for when to stop gaining - I guess that point will be when I start feeling a bit too chunky.

So far I've not missed workouts, daily protein targets, or cold showers - I'm aiming to cultivate these habits. I've a quote that has been motivating me to perform these actions even if I don't feel like it:
Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity ― James Clear, Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones
A few points:

1.) Definitely need to incorporate dips. I've forgotten all about these exercises. They're great. Planche pushups seem to be working out though. Right now I'm up to 4 sets of 8 being 16" from the wall.

2.) Weighted chin-ups are working great. I'm almost at 3 sets of 8 with 11.2 pound backpack.

3.) For legs - yes, I'm already looking for a replacement for shrimp squats. It is really hard to beat old school barbell squats for leg development. I think the reality here is that for the purposes of muscle gain, the bodyweight leg exercises don't exactly cut it. They can if you've great flexibility and coordination - but those I lack right now so it will only impede on progress if my goal is just aesteic reasons.

4.) For abs, I've just been doing sets of timed levered planks. Meaning my feet are up on a couch. I'm at 3 sets of 50 seconds with goal to keep increasing the time in plank for each workout. I'll need to graduate to something with more resistance though as this is just turning into an endurance exercises. Weighted decline situps should suffice but I gotta make sure any movements I do here don't put flexion on the spine - I've a history of lower back problems.


@Shaz

Lunges are great. Lately I've been trying to figure out how to increase some flexibility in my lowerbody. I did track in high school so I've had some practice with dynamic warm-ups. Keeps the knees healthy.

Cold showers suck still but I always feel good after doing them so I've kept up with it. It has not gotten easier yet though.

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Lemur
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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by Lemur »

Going to replace the planks with the sliding abdominal tuck after watching this. Last exercise in video. https://youtu.be/TqXwI1MWZks This is a great exercise because no weights are required and you can increase difficulty the further you slide. My abs are burning.

Still looking for a way to increase mechanical tension for legs that is reliable. I did Bulgarian Split squats and lunges but I was already over 100 reps. With shrimp squats, I am limited by poor flexibility and coordination.

Step ups seem promising. https://imgur.com/Ga6RHLE

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Re: Lemur Journal!

Post by shaz »

Are you most interested in increasing endurance, strength, power, or size?

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