What I Spend

[zbigi]

2. We replaced the car tires, only to learn the battery is also going. With winter upon us, that meant another $180 into the car. I think all the delayed maintenance is done. We only drive a few thousand miles a year, so hopefully we're limited to oil changes for a couple years. I don't think this is an area where I could come out ahead with DIY, but the $1000 over two months kinda hurts.

On the car battery, I don't know if you're aware that it's a good idea to charge it once a while if you don't drive much. It greatly extends the lifespan of a battery. A modern, electronically-controlled car battery charger is like $20.

[Scott 2]

We are driving most days now, just short trips - around 5 miles each way.

The charger would have been a good idea during 2020. Our car was sitting for 2-4 weeks at a time. We'd take 30 minute drives solely because it had been sitting so long. I think that contributed to the dry rot in our tires as well.

[zbigi]

We are driving most days now, just short trips - around 5 miles each way.

The charger would have been a good idea during 2020. Our car was sitting for 2-4 weeks at a time. We'd take 30 minute drives solely because it had been sitting so long. I think that contributed to the dry rot in our tires as well.

From what I've read on the Internet, it takes up to 15 minutes of engine working to just recoup the amount of energy used to start the car. So, short trips are probably energy neutral, or even negative.

[SouthernAlchemy]

I just got through your journal. It was an interesting read. I left my previous employer/career with pretty similar feelings of disgust a few years ago. My plan was just semi-ERE, but I lucked into a full time job that I can not only tolerate, but I actually enjoy. I think the key is that it is a totally different industry than my old career, so I have no standards or expectations for myself or for the job to meet. I just go in, enjoy the challenges and keep stacking cash. There is a little bit of constraint on my time, of course, but with the work from home situation, that feels negligible. I suppose since you were a pretty high earner, it might be hard to 'start over' in something new, pay-wise. In my experience, anyone semi-competent can move up pretty quickly

I'm also interested to see if you seek therapy for your suspected autism. For a couple of years I have had a strong suspicion that I have ADHD, never diagnosed, of course. I've been curious as to what, if any, benefits seeking a diagnosis or therapy would have. On the one hand, maybe it could help me change some things for the better, on the other, I've made it this far and I am doing OK so...

Cheers!

[Scott 2]

For a couple of years I have had a strong suspicion that I have ADHD, never diagnosed, of course. I've been curious as to what, if any, benefits seeking a diagnosis or therapy would have.

My two session intake is scheduled this month, at a practice that specializes in autism. My insurance has no limit on sessions. I am definitely taking the ride. Part of what will complicate it, is I've had autism as an area of special interest for close to a decade. So the therapist gets to contend with my self-serve past. It's going to confuse the conversation.

From what I gather, the goal is to learn when and how the condition is impacting your life. Through that lens, you learn to apply compensating strategies.


For me - it was extremely freeing to recognize that some things, I'm just not going to try my way out of. Examples:


1. If the average person experiences a crowd at 3/10, I'm at an 8/10. No amount of practice will normalize that stress. I have to mitigate.


2. I resisted getting my drivers license and to this day refuse city or highway driving. I used to think it was a lack of experience or motivation. Not quite. My brain is poor at filtering all the sensory input. It really is a dangerous situation. It's not a case where I need to man up.


3. My cognitive empathy doesn't work properly. I do not automatically infer suffering by hearing about someone else's experience. My intuitive response to "Sally had a miscarriage" would be "oh, ok" - totally blank face. I might even wonder why they are telling me.

Yet - if I read a story about the same experience, where the author described Sally's internal turmoil, my tears would flow. It's not that I'm calloused - my affective empathy might even be over-sensitive. Making that initial connection though, it's not going to happen.

You can imagine the impact this has on relationships. I memorized some patterns and scripts through years of trial and error. But grasping the underlying principle - life changing.

[Scott 2]

January 2022 Total (Couple) - $2290
Groceries - $597
Automotive - $526
Home Maintenance - $340
Healthcare/Medical - $338
Utilities - $256
Exercise - $139
Clothing/Shoes - $84
Streaming - $10
Entertainment - $0
Video Games - $0

We are $500 under the planned budget of $2780. Some medical expenses for January were delayed to February. My wife barely touched her discretionary money.

We encountered a few price increases on services (gym, trash) and the car needed a new battery. Executing all planned spending would have put us several hundred over budget.

I left $65 of discretionary money unspent. All my interesting ideas are over $100. Figuring out small wins became tedious, so I stopped wasting the energy. In my efforts, I overpaid for barefoot sandals - $84! I am climbing the curve of diminishing returns. It raises some feelings.


February 2022 Estimate (Couple) - $3219
We are back to normally scheduled spending. All money moved to smooth Q4 2021 cash flow has been accounted for.

$1400 is planned for medical expenses. My discretionary budget for the month is $100. Not a fun comparison, but I think it works. Our days will be full.

With food prices going up, I am revisiting batch cooking. I picked up a 9x13 glass pan. Baked oatmeal was an easy win. Future ideas include pasta, enchilada pie, maybe a biryani. If all goes well, I'll put a couple 9x13's into rotation.

A new 8 week lifting cycle kicks off on 2/5. I've decided to clean up my diet for the duration - no alcohol, no hyper-palatable foods, and minimal sugar. While money is not the primary motivation, it will impact food costs. I feel fortunate to have my home gym.

Nightly yoga has been rewarding mentally and physically. I will continue it in February, exploring various service trials.

I committed to weekly therapy. While the appointment only lasts an hour, I think introspection will prove time consuming.


Rolling 12 Month Spend (Couple) - $54,353
We might fall a little short of hitting $57k by 3/1/2021. I suspect loose accounting rather than a true underage. Automated bottom up tracking isn't perfect. Cash, pre-tax dollars, etc.

This month brought the first significant market downturn since retirement. I have been interested, but not troubled. Everything is down, including assets excluded when simplifying our portfolio. Knowing that makes it easier to accept what is.

I expect to finish 2021 taxes in February, then make the draft budget for year 2 of retirement. We'll finalize and execute around mid-March.

Our budgeting process includes a rolling 3 month forecast. With annual re-planning TBD, we assumed no change from 2021. My hope is that proves conservative. We also left a fair amount of slack in our forecasts - $900 unplanned for March, $550 for April. A lot of this is arbitrary. Hopefully it works.

[Scott 2]

Took the first run at taxes. This is another case where not working is harder. Some of the challenges:

1. I almost forgot to add my manual HSA contributions. My employer used to take them pre-tax. For reasons, my max allowed is 2400. Turbo tax doesn't pick up those reasons and says 3600. Yikes. But I almost lost out on the $2400 deduction.

2. I screwed up when re-balancing to setup my retirement portfolio, realizing $10k in short term capital gains. Edit - my state taxes both as normal income. Still figuring out how this impacts my federal. There's no reason I couldn't have held the funds for another year, realizing the gains as long term.

3. My 1095-A form (healthcare subsidy) has the benchmark premium in my state as $0. Blindly filling that into Turbo Tax gives a $0 premium tax credit. After an hour healthcare.gov call and 3 tiers of support, I learned this is not a number that gets corrected on the 1095-A. It's up to me to second guess it and reconcile it on my 8962. Back to TurboTax...

[Scott 2]

Apparently issue 3 is a result of not taking the premium tax credit when signing up for my ACA plan. For some reason, that causes the benchmark premium in the 1095-A to print as 0. My best guess is to input the correct value as the benchmark premium when loading the 1095-A into turbotax. I think that's going to carry though into the 8962. But, it will then also make my return differ from the filed 1095-A - potentially triggering attention from the IRS. Ugh. The credit is enough that I'm going for it, but WTF.

I am not alone in the problem, it seems:

https://poorerthanyou.com/2018/02/05/ob ... b-is-zero/

[Scott 2]

I am 70% confident our federal income tax rate for 2021 is negative - no tax due, plus the ACA premium tax credit.

The results seem to good to be true. I have gone in circles questioning them. Subtly tweaking various parts of the return. Seeing what changes. Re-reading calculation instructions. Various online searches. Tracing through form steps manually. Etc.

I think I am ready to accept it.

What tipped me over the edge - I figured out turbo tax will show all supporting forms, buried beneath one of the print options. In that PDF, I traced the zero calculation of Line 16 from my 1040, to the Qualified Dividends and Capital Gains Worksheet. Stepping through that form gives me the same zero result.

On the bright side, if this is correct, one of my biggest financial regrets from last year was invalid. Realizing about $10k in short term capital gains didn't hurt me at all. It only simplified my portfolio. Maybe there was even space left for some Roth conversions? Too late for that now.


Gonna sit on all this for awhile, see if anything unexpected happens.

[MBBboy]

For batch cooking, chili is something to consider. We've been making some freezer meals in advance and have a bunch of chili, enchiladas, lasagna, and breakfast burritos.

The chili also provided entertainment for a weekend - smoked a couple of briskets, with the required "supervisory" activity of sitting outside in a lawn chair with a beer or two. Briskets take 12+ hours so didn't do it the entire time, but definitely spent 3-4 hours "cooking" outside. Pretty cheap day!

[Scott 2]

For batch cooking, chili is something to consider.

Made some last week, great option. I run a crock of dried beans every 7-10 days. Admittedly, not the same production value as smoking a brisket.

I last focused on batch cooking about 10 years ago. Back then my priority was office meals. Portioning during prep was a large consideration, as well as ease in reheating/eating. Very utilitarian. The goal was to beat gulping down a can of cold chili in a hotel room. My standards were not high. While cost was a consideration, time was my primary constraint.

Now that I am not working, I think there's opportunity to re-frame the skill. I have time to experiment. I can make taste and quality a priority. I have access to my full kitchen when reheating and eating. I've also found myself drifting towards to 2 large meals per day. The what and when varies, based upon whatever is happening. It is all far more variable. I think pulling from a couple casserole dishes will fit really well.

[Scott 2]

February 2022 Total (Couple) - $3168
Healthcare/Medical - $1252
Home Maintenance - $681
Groceries - $561
Utilities - $322
Exercise - $145
Pets/Pet Care - $58
Taxes - $93
Automotive - $36
Streaming - $20

We are about $50 under the planned budget of $3219. The primary cause is my wife. She barely touched her discretionary money and decided to consume down her backlog of a medicine.

Instead, we bought a higher end convection toaster oven - $300. Since we rarely eat out these days, the new option for cooking is welcome. Come Summer, less heat in the kitchen will be a clear win.

I picked up an $80 kettle, for the bedroom. The goal was to add "cup of tea" into my wake-up routine. Maybe chaining my behaviors will save time. Results have been mixed. I often find reasons to break the chain.

With both purchases - my standard has increased beyond "bare minimum". I want the full experience, and I don't want to spend energy buying used. Part of it is the no-hassle returns. We also tried a high end automated cat feeder. The cat defeated it within a week, so back it went. Easy.

I am a month in to the therapy experiment. So far, it's hard to say the value is there. Outside of the appointment itself, I am finding the introspection adds overhead to my week. There's an opportunity cost to that time and energy. From what I read, benefits can take 6 plus months to emerge. We'll see if it lasts. Explaining my life to someone else, the autism feels laughably obvious. We haven't found a reason to pursue formal diagnosis, so far.

Batch cooking was extremely limited. I made baked oatmeal once. Since I am taking a break from hyper-palatable food and alcohol in my diet, the incentive to cook just isn't there. My interest in food waned, leading to very boring meals.


March 2022 Estimate (Couple) - $3438
There's a fair amount of slack in the March budget. Enough that my ERE wheaton level is clearly regressing.

We are considering a new dishwasher. We may roll money for it into April, or even May. My initial search turned up a Bosch 300 at about $1200 installed. Similar to the toaster oven, it is higher end. At the very least, we'll watch for a decent sale. It's possible with education, we may prefer a less expensive unit. It's not like I'm going to purchase special soap or drying liquid.

Our current dish washer is nearly twenty years old. It is disgusting, like pink mold growing in the bottom gross. The spring on the soap dispenser broke, so we've been spraying some in and calling it good enough. There has been a total lack of maintenance or preventive care. Some say we'd be better off rehabbing the old appliance, since environmental standards have hobbled new units. I don't think I have the motivation. However - objectively describing our situation, I realize we have to clean the old one, so we learn enough to avoid ruining a new one.

Kitten season starts soon. If we get some fosters, significant energy will go into their care.


Rolling 12 Month Spend (Couple) - I lost count
February closes the first year of retirement. We landed close to the $57k target. While planning for year 2, I identified enough imprecision that tallying a final total feels pointless. Our budgeting approach doesn't depend on the rolling 12 month spend anymore. I'll probably drop it.

For year 2, we've budgeted $58,700. Hardly ERE or even lean FIRE. I am confident in our plan and comfortable with the lifestyle. Even more so, since taxes went from 20% of year 1 to nearly zero in year 2. That really eases the sting of inflation. Having affordable medical care helps too.

With more money available, I am seriously considering orthodontia. The less invasive option is around $10k, over 2-3 years. The more invasive option includes 1-2 jaw surgeries. If my health insurance approves it, out of pocket costs would remain around $10k. Declining either option feels short sighted. One ortho asked me - "how do you even eat"?!?! I guess the issues get worse with age. On the other hand, I've made it this far. Who wants adult braces, let alone preventive surgery? Not an easy choice.

Our consumption during Year 1 of retirement was higher than I ever imagined. Year 2 is tracking to offer even more. Yet, I feel the constraint of a budgetary cap. Will high consumption eventually relieve that pressure? Or is this hedonic adaptation, an early symptom of lifestyle creep?

Actively pursuing medical care feels pretty darn reasonable. The $1200 dish washer - less so.

[bostonimproper]

I have a question, let me know if it is out of bounds or resonates: do you have anything going on right now that you enjoy being bad at, like a novice level hobby?

I’m wondering whether you might be hitting a wall with “hard” (read: “I’m hitting the unrewarding barrier to entry over and over”) tasks like for DIY? And you feel somewhat unsatisfied that you can’t as easily compensate from skill lack with your previous making money specialty. And that’s leaving you feel a bit less in control of your capital flows than you’d like?

I know for myself I can get into these mindsets where I feel like I’m only good at this one niche thing that I do for my job and money (and who’s to say I’m even good at that) and that left to my own devices without this cushion of money I’d be floundering. Thought spiral catastrophizing, etc. And when I’ve investigated that a little deeper, it’s clear I haven’t always built up the belief that I’m capable of one day becoming good or at least better at the stuff I now find hard (static versus fixed mindset).

So yeah, maybe a bit of projecting but wondering whether you might be going through something similar? Where the initial not-knowing-what-to-do and feel-like-flailing-around a DIY task magnifies your dislike for it? And whether having an area you give yourself permission to just have fun with it might help you feel more open to the skill acquisition side of things?

[Scott 2]

do you have anything going on right now that you enjoy being bad at, like a novice level hobby?

I am swimming 2-3 times a week and absolutely terrible at it. I loosely considered paying for coaching, but have thus far been content to flounder. My barefoot shoe experiment is ongoing as well. I expect that to become more interesting once spring arrives. I'd agree this type of learning is essential to mental health and well being.

More often than not, I am drawn to physical hobbies. And I suck at them. That doesn't hinder my enjoyment at all. The intellectual stuff (which comes easily), I find boring. Like I'm a trained monkey conditioning to perform yet another trick. Decades of doing just that (with work/school) probably didn't help. It made me very one dimensional, and I am over it.


My return on effort for DIY has been good. Every attempt teaches a ton. Since our house reflects my low skill level, results are easy to attain. But they don't motivate me. All I care about is averting a crisis level problem, keeping the status quo stable. I gain no satisfaction from the completed job. I feel no pride in the results.

I have the time and capacity to pull from non-financial resources. I admire when others do so. But, I honestly don't want to. I ordered the fill valve to repair a noisy toilet about two months ago. The package has been sitting since. My water bill isn't impacted, so I am content to ignore the work. It might take an hour or two?

Some here are driven by renaissance aspirations, others fear of societal collapse. Not me. Any DIY I have undertaken, it is entirely to follow the path of least resistance. A means to the end. An idealized self might act differently, but that's not who I am. The interest isn't there.


I think my awareness of the budgetary constraints comes from several sources:

1. Comparison to others. My work peers are reaching director / VP level. They are earning accordingly. While I wouldn't trade, the simple math makes for a very unfavorable comparison. My old boss just moved into a 14,000 sq. ft. estate.

2. I have the time to develop and explore very specific wants. Work no longer acts as a sink for that min/maxing energy. We have enough resources that satisfying some of them IS attainable. So I am making constant and ongoing trade offs.

3. I remember a time when satisfying those wants was trivial. At any point, I could trade my freedom and return to that time. Taking 6 months to burn through 50k of wants is readily attainable. So I am always choosing not to.

4. Watching white collar salaries go crazy, there's an aspect of FOMO. It's possible that number above is off by an order of magnitude.

5. Without work, my consumption has an upper bound. Therefore my life has an upper bound. While that has always existed, never before was it so clearly finite. The feeling is exaggerated by my health insurance, which requires us to hit a specific income window. It all feels very locked in.

[jacob]

1. Comparison to others. My work peers are reaching director / VP level. They are earning accordingly. While I wouldn't trade, the simple math makes for a very unfavorable comparison. My old boss just moved into a 14,000 sq. ft. estate.

[...]

5. Without work, my consumption has an upper bound. Therefore my life has an upper bound. While that has always existed, never before was it so clearly finite. The feeling is exaggerated by my health insurance, which requires us to hit a specific income window. It all feels very locked in.

Maybe this is or will be relatable?
https://www.getrichslowly.org/fifteen-y ... etirement/

[Scott 2]

That's a good article, thanks.

The closing of paths is especially pertinent. Intellectually, I know I left a trajectory many aspire to. Emotionally - I'm not sure I fully appreciate the outcome. A year in, I am only beginning to experience how lives diverge.

While my financial constraints are annoying, the scarier aspect is watching paths close for my former peers. Work stress is killing them. Full stop.

[Scott 2]

I felt myself heading into a wall with my current lifting cycle, so I broke out the fitbit and macros tracking app...

Dropping hyper-palatable foods messed me up. I haven't been eating enough, since "be hungry" is easier and cheaper. I may have been subconsciously reacting to inflated food costs.

I think there's a good chance many days were sub 2000 calories, barely touching 100 grams of protein. I compensated by not moving, unless actively exercising. Related - I've been slow to settle for bed and had trouble with sleep quality lately. Bring it all together and my recovery has been mediocre. My strength is tapering off and my joints are starting to hurt again.

So - what to do? At least that's obvious. I am targeting 25% more calories and 40% more protein. I hit the store and loaded up on whole food sources, overbuying in some cases. I am going to chase hourly activity on the fitbit. I'll also make a point to stop eating around 8, so my digestion has time to settle down before bed. I think all of this will improve my sleep quality, which I am monitoring with the fitbit.

I think my lifting cycle can be recovered. More importantly - I expect a lift in my general sense of well being. Social isolation related to covid has been wearing on me. We're still a month from resuming activities that we dropped when Omicron spread. I bet these changes make waiting easier.


Long term, I don't want to lead a quantified life. But, this check-in feels worthwhile.

[Scott 2]

Net worth is down about 10% from 2021 peaks. More accounting for inflation. The vast majority of the change happened in the past 2 months, so it's definitely caught my attention. I am not taking any actions, but I am feeling the Ulcer Index a little.

I checked out the stuff I didn't buy. The McClung portfolio I opted against, due to complexity, would be performing better right now. Looking back over the past two years, not so much. The intent of such a portfolio is to smooth the ride. It definitely looks more appealing during this downturn!

Our financial risk remains well within manageable bounds, but I'm not loving the ride. Whether that's an indicator I need more practice managing my portfolio, or I'd prefer the greater complexity, I'm not sure. I don't think now is time to make changes.


Funny to link these two, but I stopped the therapist. We met 7 times, with her often letting the session run over, so roughly 10 hours of conversation. No actionable change resulted. I found myself resenting the obligation in my week - time, energy and money. I didn't arrive with a specific problem, and I wasn't offering her any large levers to pull, so maybe the result is not unexpected. She may have offered more value during my peak of my work stress.

[Lemur]

How much protein are you aiming for in grams? I've found it rather easy to hit my target protein levels but I do it through deliberate tracking on a app daily. I haven't read your journal so I'm not sure what your goals are in particular (fat loss, muscle gain, etc.)

What is illuminating is to recognize that hitting your protein target while keeping calories at maintenance and/or in a deficit is that just about everything you eat has to be either protein based (meat, dairy, beans/legumes) or have some trace proteins that come with it (like Spinach, whole grains, peas, etc.). Eliminating the processed foods should help with this.

The easiest method I came up with is to just accept one chicken breast into my daily life....a 300 gram breast has 90 grams of protein. Then getting the other 60 grams is no problem and I have much more variety in things I want to eat instead. (My target is 150 a day).

[theanimal]

I had similar experiences when I went to therapy a few years ago. I think most therapists will struggle if you don't have any concrete or serious problems. At least IME, most seem to be mind mechanics rather than helping one develop internally and move towards their highest self.