Long Sclass post...feel free to step out for popcorn
I've had a lot of relationships fail because of this. For me I would say I'm surrounded by "high achievers " and they have big egos. Jealousy is a very real thing. Some have visibly lost control and started shrieking at me in public "no fair!" Rather than stick around and learn details they run off for ego preservation.
The most extreme case are my siblings. PhD professionals. Always told me I was a loser. Ten years older than me. Them 58 me 48. They were very upset to hear I walked out of my job without a new position at 43. They'd call regularly checking to see if I had interviews lined up. Then I'd use my crap emotional intelligence and say I'm retired over and over till they stopped offering career advice.
I felt like the character Gal in Sexy Beast being badgered by Ben Kingsley.
(Edit found this)
https://youtu.be/izuGqIi_-vc
Oddly last night my SO said a lot of what is happening between my siblings and the care of my mom has to do with them feeling better about my retirement. They just dumped the job on me. The most painful part is they just don't care what is happening to me. Or that they do in a sadistic way.
My sibs are hyper competitive people. They will actually do really stupid things to show they are better than you with no regard to actually performing better. One example is taking joy in a successful friend or relative's terminal illness. I am dead serious. I've seen a little smile in the corner of their mouths when they talk about an old classmate (a dot com millionaire) who got in a car crash and lost his ability to walk. Or the joy I heard in my brothers voice as he asked me details about the nature of my heart condition - he didn't even know he was getting turned on by the whole thing but I saw him smiling. Somehow hearing an old successful friend is struggling with brain cancer gives them happiness. "See sclass money isn't everything!"
sick bastards don't even see themselves cracking subtle smiles in their eyes.
Sick bastards. They were made for each other. When my sister won an essay contest at age fourteen my brother tripped her as she paraded around the house with her trophy. She got pretty banged up on the stairs. I never understood this but it seems there are quite a few people out there like this. You find more among those with advanced degrees.
Anyhow SO said not only are my siblings not helping with mom, they are probably taking some joy in my suffering. They can justify their careers by saying "look at sclass, retirement isn't looking so good now." Seriously they are that twisted and jealous. I'm not there to verify it but I'm sure envy has a big contribution towards their behavior.
I find this behavior concentrated in the friends and relatives I call "achievers" motivated students, competitive, high test scores but kinda dumb in the big picture thinking. You know the types who were more interested in the distribution of test scores on the final rather than the content of the lectures.
My other class of friends I call the "junkyard millionaires", no university education, small business people and rich, don't get this way. They will ask me how I raised enough money to generate sufficient passive income and if they should be looking into some of my vehicles as they wind down their businesses. Typical junkyard millionaire says, "Sclass, explain it one more time but really slow for me like I'm really dumb. What kind of downside risk are we looking at?"
It seems a lot to do with the audience.
Last story, my eighty year old aunt. She has always been upset about my apparent ability to survive without working. She has visibly lost her composure about it. Upset her sons cannot compete with me. I had dinner with her in June and she told me something in her clouded monotone with glazed eyes,
"There was this little girl I knew when I was eight. She lived in a bigger house than mine. She had all the nice (cannot remember brand) XYZ Dolls neatly lined up on her shelf. The complete set. I hated her. I just wanted to beat her up."
Whoa. Note to self. This woman badgered me from the moment I retired till now. She would rant "you're not rich how come you get to do this?" Well now I know. It's comes deep from within.
That being said I don't tell people how I survive anymore. I say consulting engineer too. Envy is just too big a part of human nature. Guys killed brothers over a few extra goats back in the day. Be careful what you wish for.