I think this is when I'm supposed to do the year in review post. I feel like I got a bit lost in 2022, particularly in the latter half; drifting along in the discontent of an unfulfilling job. However, in the past month and a half or so, I think I have started to emerge from the thicket. I am still not back to my previous levels of stoke or motivation or whatever one wants to call it, however I at least feel like I have aspects of my life that I find engaging once again.
If this past year has taught me anything, it's how much I took my career for granted in providing my life purpose and identity. In a way, I am grateful that my career took an unfulfilling turn, because it forced me to come up with ways to life purposefully outside of the salaryman construct. This is a bridge I was going to have to eventually cross when entering retirement, but at least I still have the guardrails of full-time employment to provide structure during these uncertain times. And to be clear, I don’t think I’m fully across the chasm, but I do think I’m starting to be able to make out the outlines of the other shore.
One development was returning to Magic: the Gathering. I played it as a kid but stopped for a decade and a half never really thought twice about it. I was fully engaged in things like learning guitar, learning Mandarin, studying computer science, learning new jobs in the Army, and so on. My analytical brain was fully occupied in my lifestyle, so I found no need for further analytical outlets in the form of games. However, with my mindless job over the last 18 months, I found that my brain was missing some engagement. MTG filled that role and continues to do so, which goes to show that my retirement must include proper levels of mental engagement for my sanity and happiness.
I frequently re-read Jacob’s blog post on breaking up with your career:
http://earlyretirementextreme.com/break ... areer.html
I’m coming to terms with the fact that I have changed from my 22-26 year old self. During that time, I worked in some special places doing extraordinary work that was very much a product of the times, both with myself being young, single, and hungry to explore/challenge myself and with wars raging that provided a laboratory to innovate. Although I still think I would find that work fulfilling today, I think my priorities have shifted a bit. I actually don’t plan on fully breaking up with my career, however I have solidified that I’ll be leaving active duty which is a huge transition. In the Reserves, I will in theory be able to pick and choose only the jobs that appeal most to me, allowing me to savor the aspects of the career I still love while bypassing many of the shortcomings.
Of course, the other big change that has emerged in the past 2 or so years is my relationship with DGF. As our relationship has developed more, we have both really started to think of ourselves as a team. So, my work and lifestyle decisions incorporate her and vice versa. I really feel like we both complement each other and that our lives together are better than what either of us could do in isolation.
But what does this all mean for 2023 and later?
Well first off, after much deliberation my retirement lifestyle has started to take shape. I am now within 18 months of making the transition and there are various gates that will have to be met leading up to my separation. I have decided I will continue service in the Reserves for a number of reasons.
First off, as I indicated above, I actually don’t hate my career as much as a hate my current job and certain aspects of the active duty lifestyle (specifically the frequent geographic moves and lack of control over assignment). I do still enjoy doing Army things and actually miss some of the more physically demanding aspects like parachuting, hiking, shooting, and so on. Ditto with the camaraderie that comes from doing hard things with a group of people. I also feel like there are things that I never got to do in the military which feel a bit like an unresolved to do list. Certain deployments, jobs, ribbons, badges, schools, and so on still appeal to me. The Reserves give me the opportunity to volunteer for specific active duty assignments on my own terms.
Then there are the financial aspects. >$13k for working a month or 2 a year, ridiculously cheap healthcare, and the ability to keep accumulating years towards a pension. Although these all come secondary because I have already saved up ~20 years of expenses so I have the flexibility to take a few years off from paid employment as needed.
MTG is another leg of my ERE stool, although I’m uncertain how lucrative it will actually be. Gone are the days when pro players survive off of just tournament winnings, rather many pros make much more money from content creation. I started recording gameplay videos to improve my playing and have built up an audience of >100 subscribers on Youtube in a few months (web of goals win?). 1000 subscribers are needed to get a slice of ad revenue, so there is still a long way to go, however I have received a lot of positive feedback and it seems like my rate of growth is faster than many other creators in the same niche. Once an audience is built there are other monetization strategies like Twitch, Patreon, and so on. I could see continuing this as a business in my retirement as I incorporate attending in-person tournaments and collaborating with other content creators. I’m fortunate that I don’t need to make very much money and that I find the hobby rewarding.
I expect DGF to continue to be foundational in my life in 2023 and beyond. We have talked extensively about the future and have a shared vision that aligns with both of us. We also have now been together for 2 of the past ~2.5 years we have known each other and have overcome numerous hardships. I have thought more and more about marriage in recent months, although I still think it is a bit too early to pull the trigger. Our long distance relationship complicates things a bit because it’s harder for us to test drive living together and further intertwining our lives. I spent a month living in her house while we were both working and that went relatively smoothly.
Even with separate addresses for at least the next 18 months, we are paying a hefty financial penalty by not getting married. This year she starts having to pay for her own health insurance at a cost of ~$1.5k a month. As I’ve written before, I’m giving up ~$15k a year in financial benefits by remaining unmarried. Of course, getting married just for financial reasons is not prudent, but the optimizer in me continues to give careful consideration to at what point we just take the next step. I have a feeling DGF and I may be married by the end of 2023, even if we just elope and postpone the wedding to a future date. DGF insists on a fake engagement ring if/when the time comes of course, citing that real diamonds are a waste of money.
It's even better if you know someone else who also plays in the same formats as you, then you can discuss strategies etc. I pretty much talk Magic daily with my best friend, even if it's some quick remarks making fun of some of his deck preferences etc.