Alcohol moderation

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Smashter
Posts: 541
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Location: Midwest USA

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Smashter »

Chiming in to wish everyone luck on this challenge! I stopped drinking alcohol a little over 3 years ago. I got a lot of support on this thread I made about the pros and cons of quitting alcohol, which others might find interesting as well: viewtopic.php?t=9595&hilit=quit+alcohol

The beginning was definitely the hardest, it gets so much easier.

ertyu
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by ertyu »

Andrew Huberman podcast on alcohol for anyone who'd like a bump in motivation

M
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Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2010 7:34 pm

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by M »

ertyu wrote:
Sat Dec 03, 2022 8:47 pm
Andrew Huberman podcast on alcohol for anyone who'd like a bump in motivation
Yes!!

Sorry I just love Andrew Huberman. I've listened to about half of his podcasts at this point and they are always amazing.

mathiverse
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Joined: Fri Feb 01, 2019 8:40 pm

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by mathiverse »

Fourth day of going sugarless this December and the fourth day I've had sugar this December. :)

I've also been at least trying to keep track of why I have sugar like ertyu has been doing. I've already tried a few things to avoid eating sugar based on those observations. I'll see how tomorrow goes.

M
Posts: 423
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2010 7:34 pm

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by M »

https://youtu.be/wD8reCw3Kls (David Sinclair)

Motivation for people struggling to give up sugar.

I went to a party today. They had homemade cheesecake and chocolate marshmellow cake that everyone was eating. I could not resist the temptation.

*sigh*

I am currently high on sugar...challenge failed today. Will retry tomorrow.

Hristo Botev
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Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2018 3:42 am

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Hristo Botev »

Western Red Cedar wrote:
Tue Nov 29, 2022 7:18 pm
I'm planning on abstaining from alcohol until New Years Eve. Possibly a bit longer depending on how I feel. Anyone interested in joining?
Little late to the game, but I’ll join in; long overdue.

Western Red Cedar
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Joined: Tue Sep 01, 2020 2:15 pm

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Western Red Cedar »

Smashter wrote:
Fri Dec 02, 2022 10:51 am
Chiming in to wish everyone luck on this challenge! I stopped drinking alcohol a little over 3 years ago. I got a lot of support on this thread I made about the pros and cons of quitting alcohol, which others might find interesting as well: viewtopic.php?t=9595&hilit=quit+alcohol

The beginning was definitely the hardest, it gets so much easier.
Thanks for the link. Very cool to hear about your update after reading through that thread. Have you maintained most of your old social circles or gravitated to different ones? Care to elaborate about some of the benefits you've noticed? The social pressure is probably most difficult for me when hanging out with old friends, but it hasn't been too bad over the last couple of months.

SouthernAlchemy
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Joined: Fri Jan 15, 2021 8:11 pm

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by SouthernAlchemy »

@smashter Three years is awesome! I have a similar problem with overdoing it and ending up feeling like crap for extended periods. Initial hangover, of course, but also my sleep seems to take 2 or 3 nights to get back to some sort of equilibrium. I try to remind myself of that whenever my thoughts start to wander towards having a drink. I enjoyed the thread and it's so cool that you have been sticking with it.

@mathiverse & M The struggle is real :) You got this. I should seriously join you, but I got to take it one substance at a time.

My brother has always been able to just have one drink and be done. It is interesting that I am wired totally different. On Thanksgiving he left a couple of beers in my fridge. This past weekend, while just chilling at the house, I kept thinking of those beers in there all cold and frosty. mmmmm. I had to dig deep, but I resisted their siren song. The thought of everyone here actually did help! Thanks guys!

Hristo Botev
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Hristo Botev »

ertyu wrote:
Sat Dec 03, 2022 8:47 pm
Andrew Huberman podcast on alcohol for anyone who'd like a bump in motivation
Ugh, that was a bummer to listen to.

Smashter
Posts: 541
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Location: Midwest USA

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Smashter »

@WRC I’ve maintained my same core group of friends and my same social circles. I do almost everything I always did, just without drinking.

I found in the beginning that the anticipation was worse for me than the actual event. The idea of going to a wedding or bachelor party without getting drunk was horrifying, but when I actually showed up and did those things I was not craving booze the whole time. I found I got more energy and felt better as the night went on, a sort of inverse of what nights were like when I was drinking. Each hour that went by was more evidence that I could really do it. As bar closed, I could look around and think, “I did it! And I’m going to feel so much better tomorrow morning than I would otherwise!” I think in that moment that most of my stumbling, word slurring, eyes glazed over friends would have happily traded places with me.

My main fear with quitting was that my 1:1 conversations with my best and oldest friends wouldn’t be as deep because I would feel more inhibited. I am happy to report this is not the case. I continue to have fun and enriching conversations. I also think that caffeine can serve basically the same purpose as alcohol if you meet up with someone in the morning for coffee. I’ve also noticed I can actually remember the things I talked about with my friends now, which is lovely.

I will say that I am most tempted to drink when hanging with a good friend and getting ready to settle into a good, long chat. Then the chat always goes great anyway and I am happy I resisted. That said, if I can ever get to a point where, maybe once or twice a year, I can have 2-3 drinks without that turning into 10-12, I would have those drinks while hanging in intimate settings with great friends. Despite what I said about the bachelor parties, there is this small, probably irrational part of me that thinks that while my conversations with my friends and family are awesome overall, I might be missing out on some peak experiences, those moments that stay with you forever and forge new bonds so unbreakable they are worth the hangover. Maybe there’s a reason that alcohol consumption co-arose with the rise of civilization as a whole (at least I think it did?)

I have also found that I have way less tolerance for meeting up with acquaintances or friends-of-friends that I used to get drunk with, but never established a ton of true sober rapport with. Maybe I’d still have a great time with them, but it feels like a hurdle to start a whole new relationship.

As a final minor negative change post quitting, I almost never go dancing with my wife anymore. That’s something we used to love doing, though of course we were always drunk. That could just be us ending a phase, but I do wonder if I need to make more of an effort to find replacements for such formerly drunken activities.

In terms of overall benefits of quitting:
- Never being hungover is number one with a bullet. I can still vividly recall how bad it can get. It’s truly an awful way to experience the world.
- I engage in less risky behavior. I am ashamed to say that I’ve driven when I shouldn’t have plenty of times, and it was always so easy to justify when I was in that state of mind. I am very grateful nothing bad ever happened to me or someone else. I love being the DD now.
- I definitely sleep better than I used to, especially when it comes to snoring and apnea events. I once slept in a room full of doctors after a night of drinking and when I got up in the morning they were like, “Dude, your breathing was really bad, you have sleep apnea and need to get it checked out.” It turns out that I did, and drinking made it way worse. (Not to derail, but I recently got a deviated septum surgery which has cleared up all nighttime breathing issues, at least according to DW’s reports)
- I exercise more. While I could force myself to workout while hungover, it is not something I remember fondly.
- There’s a satisfaction in knowing I am reducing my chances of certain bad health outcomes, such as liver disease and whatever other horrible things I’m sure Andrew Huberman talks about in the above podcast :)
- I save way more money now
- I really like being the type of person who can go against the grain and do hard things. I feel great when people tell me they are impressed that I don’t drink, or that they are trying to cut back too. I feel like I am inspiring people people in my own little way.

There are tradeoffs to quitting, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. But for me, the benefits of stopping alcohol far outweigh the negatives.

M
Posts: 423
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2010 7:34 pm

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by M »

I completed the no sugar challenge today, mostly by not eating much of anything. :lol: Sugar is in a surprising number of things, it is hard to avoid.

I made these as a sugar free snack that takes the place of my normal sugary snacks. They are delicious and now what I turn to when I have a sugar cravings. This and fruit.

https://healthyfitnessmeals.com/healthy-oatmeal-bars/

I have a lunch to go to tomorrow..I'm sure my sweet sweet love sugar will be there....hmmm...

ertyu
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by ertyu »

SouthernAlchemy wrote:
Tue Dec 06, 2022 7:25 pm
My brother has always been able to just have one drink and be done. It is interesting that I am wired totally different.
Same. I am not drawn to drink, but when I do drink, I don't enjoy stopping at 1 or 2. For me, it's more enjoyable not to drink than to drink a bit and then have to deny myself. I guess I'm lucky I don't feel a draw to start in the first place.

I'm convinced it's all brain wiring. The fact that I can take alcohol or leave it is not any accomplishment of mine, it just is. At the same time, I really struggle with sugar and caffeine, I can't seem to stay off in spite of any negative effects. Whereas I've known people who really struggled with moderating their alcohol consumption while feeling no draw to sugar or caffeine on any level.

I am a gastarbeiter by trade, and amongst expats, having out at bars to have a drink after work is a key way to integrate yourself and meet others. As a result of my not drinking, my social life is definitely not as rich as it could be especially given that I don't make extra conscious efforts to be social. Drinking is definitely the default, least resistance option, and if one does want to have a social life, one definitely needs to make it an active choice.

M
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Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2010 7:34 pm

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by M »

Yes - I agree this is just a wiring thing. I have tried a small sip of several different beers, wines, etc when I was younger before spitting it out. I never once enjoyed the taste so never started drinking to begin with. In my youth my decision to not drink had little to do with health - I just thought the stuff tasted like poison to me. Same with coffee - I never could drink coffee either because of the taste.

If alcohol tasted like mountain dew though I would have been drunk every day.

This is why I don't fault alcoholics at all. They are just wired differently.

Consuming sugar is also very harmful and addictive, but just how harmful it is and why is not known to most people. It is also so widespread people often don't even see it as bad. It is like cigarettes in the 1970s.

My fasting blood sugar levels are in the pre-diabetic range, even with a bmi of 21, probably because of my sugar habit. Sugar will kill you also, it just takes longer and is not regulated at all.

ertyu
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by ertyu »

M wrote:
Thu Dec 08, 2022 6:20 am
Sugar will kill you also, it just takes longer and is not regulated at all.
I always think of Ella Fitzgerald who sang thatthe old rocking chair ain't never gonna get me 'cause when I get low I get high

She died in a wheelchar, with her feet amputated due to necrosis from diabetes.

SouthernAlchemy
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by SouthernAlchemy »

ertyu wrote:
Wed Dec 07, 2022 9:19 pm
I'm convinced it's all brain wiring. The fact that I can take alcohol or leave it is not any accomplishment of mine, it just is. At the same time, I really struggle with sugar and caffeine, I can't seem to stay off in spite of any negative effects. Whereas I've known people who really struggled with moderating their alcohol consumption while feeling no draw to sugar or caffeine on any level.
For me it is all three of these, and in the past a couple of other substances, too. My wiring is definitely an all or nothing thing, and it was much easier to leave those other two substances behind precisely because I also left the situations and social circles behind where they were encouraged and expected. As pretty much everyone relates in their posts, it is basically impossible to get away from these three.

A few weeks ago, at DW's family birthday dinner, wine was offered around. I declined, of course. My FIL looked a little surprised, but DD (in dramatic 17yo fashion) said, 'you aren't going to have wine on your wife's birthday!?!' Of course, that was a little worrying coming from my 17yo, but I was glad to say 'I don't need to drink wine to be able to celebrate.' I did NOT, however, turn down the tiramisu for dessert. I got a two for one with that :D

Hristo Botev
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Hristo Botev »

That Andrew Huberman podcast really through me for a loop. If I'm being honest there wasn't anything in that podcast that surprised me; rather, the podcast just really reinforced how much I've been deceiving myself when it comes to my relationship with alcohol.

Anyway, it's been 4 days now without a drink, which is a long time for me, as DW and I are both very much an after-work martini sort of couple (we even have her grandparents' monogrammed martini glasses, as they were also after-work martini folks). And I often will do another drink or 2 after that martini--I'm definitely in that 14-21 drinks/week group that Huberman talks about in the podcast.

We've been going on neighborhood walks instead, and drinking lots of hot tea. And I've been much more active with after-work tasks like installing a new mailbox (someone ran over our old one), painting and putting up blinds, etc. I certainly feel a whole lot better, though my body is still adjusting, especially with respect to sleep, which has been a little wonky.

In those 4 days I had a Knights of Columbus meeting, where beer is always flowing, but I grabbed a ginger ale instead (because that was what was available). I also had one of my evening book club seminars, which also was always an opportunity for drinking in the past--but I went with hot tea instead.

I'm encouraged; it's been long overdue.

2Birds1Stone
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by 2Birds1Stone »

Hristo Botev wrote:
Thu Dec 08, 2022 2:03 pm
If I'm being honest there wasn't anything in that podcast that surprised me; rather, the podcast just really reinforced how much I've been deceiving myself when it comes to my relationship with alcohol.
This was my experience. DW and I were part of the same club. It's been 75 days since I watched his podcast episode on YouTube, it's also coincidentally been 75 days since my last alcoholic beverage......it wasn't even difficult, it's like something inside me woke up and said, "wtf were you actually thinking".

Hristo Botev
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Hristo Botev »

Western Red Cedar wrote:
Tue Nov 29, 2022 7:18 pm
I'm planning on abstaining from alcohol until New Years Eve. Possibly a bit longer depending on how I feel. Anyone interested in joining? Feel free to participate even if you want to try it for a couple weeks or set your own deadline.
Checking in: DW and I are on our 9th day without any alcohol, and we both are feeling great. Much more quality sleep and it's starting to get easier to get to sleep at night initially than it was the first few days; lots of really vivid dreams (haven't yet had an 8-hour uninterrupted sleep cycle, but I'm getting close); stress levels seem to generally be going down for both of us; snacking less and sticking more to 3 squares; no morning brain fog, which means my early morning great books and spiritual reading has been much more productive. I just generally feel healthier without making any other changes to my lifestyle.

Still feel a brief urge for a cocktail when I close the computer at the end of the workday, but it's short lived and gets replaced by walking the dog or doing some work around the house or playing a game with the kids. I've been consuming LOTS of hot tea, which seems to scratch the itch to drink something a little more interesting than water in the evenings.

No real plans at this point to have an end date for the teetotaling; we could very likely make it permanent.

Western Red Cedar
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Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Western Red Cedar »

I'll be alcohol free for four weeks as of tomorrow. Looking forward to at least another couple of weeks. I still haven't had a chance to check out the Huberman podcast, but I've got it in my cue. Maybe that will incentivize me to keep going.
Hristo Botev wrote:
Wed Dec 14, 2022 1:52 pm
I just generally feel healthier without making any other changes to my lifestyle.
I usually take a month off every year and I've noticed alcohol consumption, at least for me, is what James Clear refers to as a keystone habit. When I abstain my nutrition is usually better, I snack a bit less, I lose weight, sleep is definitely better, and my internal dialogue isn't as critical. Simply tweaking that one habit ripples out in various ways.

Salathor
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Location: California, USA

Re: Alcohol moderation

Post by Salathor »

Western Red Cedar wrote:
Thu Dec 15, 2022 11:15 am
When I abstain my nutrition is usually better, I snack a bit less, I lose weight, sleep is definitely better, and my internal dialogue isn't as critical.
I'm just starting this no-alcohol thing again too after seeing everyone talking about it (I was very light drinking for 2-3 months earlier this year, but then went back to my usual 2-3 drinks/day lately). I definitely sleep better, but I feel like my snacking is definitely WORSE instead of better. Replacement stuff, I guess.

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