Where are you and where are you going?
Well, this is just it, right? Over the last couple of years as I've focused on this, it was my therapist who first pointed out to the blind me that "you talk like you're a victim of your life, like you didn't create it, like someone else did, but this life that YOU created is pretty damn good." I kept thinking that life could be so much better...but I just didn't have that perspective that it could be so much worse. First world problems. I mean, we've had some rough goes of it (4 month premature baby is not fun), but all in all, by almost any measure, I am living a charmed life. I have no desire to blow up this life or escape from it, fantasies notwithstanding. I'm just trying to figure out how to enjoy it for what it is here and now.7Wannabe5 wrote: ↑Sun Sep 16, 2018 5:24 amIn order to experience appreciation for the sameness of everyday life, it may be necessary to experience some lower lows to balance your higher highs. But, how can you functionally (or non-dysfunctionally) choose to do this as an affluent member of an affluent society?
@jacob That's a nice distinguishing list. I am definitely "stuck" in job mode and I don't know how I feel about it. Part of me wants to be in inspired/mission mode. It would provide meaning and inspiration and a sense of (self-?)importance - all good, affirming things. But the other part of me doesn't want my life, my energy, my identity all tied up in one thing. I am naturally broad and shallow in terms of interests, skills and abilities. I like to learn new things just to the point of being able to do it sufficiently and then I get bored. That type of personality doesn't fit well within this society's structures. Career mode just seems stupid if you're not inspired.
@jace that's a fucked up video
That's interesting in light of what my therapist would say. He would definitely agree with the idea of agency - that you have the ability to both create and change. I'm not sure about the second part where the therapist qualifies your life as "Pretty damn good". I think he would address things in terms of value. That your life has value and the life you created has value and you need to look at things through that rubric as opposed to a subjective, malleable and ultimately elusive lens focused on quality of life. So maybe it would be "but this life that YOU created is pretty damn valuable." Who knows. Maybe that's what he meant. At the end of the day they are all quacking shit out of their asses. Thank God my wife's insurance covers most of it.
The video is fucked up. Because he's fucked up. I love Swamp Thing though. But if you just read the words, it seems to be your blog in new wave form.
I think that's why the linguistic distinction is useful in therapeutic settings. "You have a good life" implies externalities and scaling. "You have value" means that Suo can still feel good about himself while his wife berates him for watching John Oliver.