Too Old To Retire "Young"

Where are you and where are you going?
latearlyFI
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by latearlyFI » Mon Jun 03, 2019 8:43 am

Congrats on the new house and new job!! I hope you get a huge boost in life contentment :) Sorry about the guy.

EdithKeeler
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Money Games

Post by EdithKeeler » Mon Jun 03, 2019 4:44 pm

Six months ago, I opened an Acorns account where they round up your purchases to the nearest dollar and deposit it into an investment account (mutual fund). I also set it up to put in $10 each Thursday. Just a little extra thing.

Sometime in December, in an effort to curtail my eating out, I made a deal with myself to put $10 in every day that I didn’t eat out at all. This included not buying anything as small as a coffee or snacks from the machine.

I’ve also dumped in another $25 most paydays, and I think I put in $100 when I got my bonus.

Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised to see that the balance hit $1500 today. Not bad with just little dribs and drabs here and there. It feels like free money.
Last edited by EdithKeeler on Tue Jun 04, 2019 5:49 am, edited 2 times in total.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Mon Jun 03, 2019 4:46 pm

Congrats on the new house and new job!! I hope you get a huge boost in life contentment :) Sorry about the guy.
Thanks! I’m sorry about the guy, too. But I love the house!

suomalainen
Posts: 668
Joined: Sat Oct 18, 2014 12:49 pm

Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by suomalainen » Mon Jun 03, 2019 9:01 pm

EdithKeeler wrote:
Fri May 31, 2019 7:09 pm
Anyway. I may be asking for dating advice soon.
Careful what you wish for...
EdithKeeler wrote:
Sat Jun 01, 2019 8:19 am
I guess—at this moment in my life (sure to change!)—I feel content. It’s a weird feeling for me.
Hi five, soul sista! Here's to weirdness!

Clarice
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Location: California

Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Clarice » Tue Jun 04, 2019 12:35 am

You and DBF will be back together before the end of this year. Wanna bet? 😉

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Sat Jun 08, 2019 3:09 pm

I was just reading back through my journal and my angst over the decision to buy a new house and move.

So far, no regrets (except I regret that I wasn’t very organized about my move!).

I got up this morning and made coffee and breakfast and enjoyed it on my patio that overlooks my beautiful backyard, and I watched my cocker spaniel “hunt” under the bushes, and I watched some birds pick thru some old dry dog food I’d tossed in the back. I could smell the magnolia blooming. I walked around the yard and took note of what’s blooming right now—each week seems to bring something new—and this week it’s lace-cap hydrangeas—and pulled a few weeds. Joe, the Cocker, helped. And while I was annoyed that the guy I was waiting for didn’t show—“appointment between 8 and noon”—I didn’t mind bring “stuck” at home at all.

Then I went over to old place to get some stuff left over there. And really had no regrets (except for my inefficient move!) as I watched the local homeless guy that’s been sleeping in car ports stop and argue with my old neighbor who was trying to do his lawn.

I also looked back in my journal and saw the goal of retiring in July 2021. I was thinking whether still doable or not, with the house purchase. Yeah, I think so. I’ll have to sell my rental house and roll that equity into the current house and pay it off... but that’s certainly doable. I’m trying, though, to decide what such a retirement would look like now. I’m not entirely certain anymore—things have changed.

horsewoman
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by horsewoman » Sun Jun 09, 2019 5:53 am

Hi Edith, I'm new in the forum but have been lurking for a while. Your journal is such a great read - actually I read it like a book over the span of a few days, very well written and lots of interesting information. I'm glad you like it at your new house, and totally get how a break-in is a catalyst for moving. Something like that happened to my home when I was 16 and I still can vividly picture the glass shards and thrown over furniture almost 25 years later, plus the accompanying feelings of helplessness. I was very glad when we moved out of that flat. So even if this move set you back a little in terms of ER I think you will be happier for it.
Looking forward to new entries!

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Wed Jun 26, 2019 9:59 pm

Looking forward to new entries!
Thank you!

EdithKeeler
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Joined: Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:55 pm

Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Wed Jun 26, 2019 11:05 pm

So last night I attended a retirement dinner for my boss. He's a great guy, and I'm sorry to see him go--I'll really miss him. It was interesting, because I always thought he was a "company man," but as he's been cleaning out his desk, I've watched him toss various pieces of company swag away.I asked him if he felt sentimental about it and he just shrugged. "Nah," he said. "This has just been a job to me. A good job, and I've done my best, but it's basically just been a way to support my life."

Anyway, last night we went for a nice dinner, and all of the people shared stories about my boss, and also the fact that he's retiring before 65 (he's just 60). And we all talked about another coworker who retired early--I think she was 57 or so when she pulled the cord--and she talked about the fact that the reason she was retiring early was because Alzheimer's runs in her family, and her brother was afflicted, and she figured she'd retire early to do some things she wanted to do before it afflicted her. (Privately, I suspect she received a diagnosis, but don't know for sure). She's been keeping very busy doing a lot of traveling and spending a lot of time with family. It's obvious she's having a great time. And we talked about another coworker who died recently after a short bout with cancer. He was exactly the same age as my boss, in great shape, but one day--the big C. He never got a chance to retire.

And we were talking about our own plans and fears. Several people said they were planning to work to 65, voiced the usual fears about the cost of health insurance, some people were cagey (I think they're getting ready to pull their own trigger...), some people joked that they can never retire; I made my usual comment that I really hoped I didn't die right after I retired, because I've worked hard to save all that money. The party continued, dessert and coffee came, and we got ready to leave.

Then we got a phone call. The husband of another coworker had just died; he and his wife went to lunch, he wasn't feeling well so went in to have a nap. She went in to check in on him.... and he was dead. 59 years old, and had just had a physical the week before with no concerns. He's a commercial pilot and they check their health pretty carefully. They'd just finished building their cabin in the Ozarks, and were going to start spending more time out there until they retired together in a couple more years--they were just waiting for their youngest to finish college.

We just sat around the table, absolutely stunned at the news. Our office is really close-knit, and most of us know the spouses and the kids. We'd all at least had met him.

Anyway, rest in peace, guy,and condolences to our friend.

I think there’s two lessons here: one, my boss has it right. Job is a means to an end, and once you get to where you need to be, move on to where you want to go, and two: life is freakin’ short, and it may be even shorter than you expect. Enjoy it, and if you want to quit and do something else, do it sooner rather than later.

Sclass
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Sclass » Thu Jun 27, 2019 8:39 am

Life is short. And for some, it can be really short.

I struggle with this conflict where I want to act as if YOLO while at the same time wanting to prepare for the future by sacrificing today. The ERE belief system has this set of opposing forces built in. It’s not really a contradiction or a conflict, but there are counteracting effects that need to be balanced with one another.

Anyone who has taken a few steps along this path knows what I’m talking about. It comes up in threads like the lifestyle inflation one. Though I don’t live the YOLO lifestyle with my money I’m certainly living it with my time as an early retiree. Maybe that’s the distinction.

7Wannabe5
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Thu Jun 27, 2019 9:14 am

Humans don't really have "time." They have something more like "vigor" or "life-energy." Obviously, this corresponds to how many more times your cells are likely going to be able to successfully replicate themselves with end-game long tail maximum of 120 years.

I was made a bit happy by the chart posted on some other thread that shows break-down of "types" on this forum and MMM, because I always have so many projects I very much want to do, I just can't stand to stay employed on boring project for any longer than is necessary to scratch together enough for my next roll. I will never be a 5 (sigh/smile.)

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:01 pm

EdithKeeler wrote:
Wed Jun 26, 2019 11:05 pm
.... and he was dead. 59 years old, and had just had a physical the week before with no concerns. He's a commercial pilot and they check their health pretty carefully.
Well, on the bright side, at least he didn't die on the job.

7Wannabe5
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Fri Jun 28, 2019 9:56 am

Also, congratulations on your new house! The great thing about settling someplace where you want to stay is you can finally break-down and spend all your "extra" pennies on any damn perennial you fancy.

I have been doing some thinking myself about the different ways in which women have to pay extra for simple physical security. Like you eventually have to throw down for some combination of dog, gun, man, gated entry, or zip-code with functional police force-pick 2. It's not like men don't have to consider these issues either, but usually the only have to maybe pick 1.

Gilberto de Piento
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Gilberto de Piento » Fri Jun 28, 2019 12:52 pm

7Wannabe5 wrote:
Thu Jun 27, 2019 9:14 am
I was made a bit happy by the chart posted on some other thread that shows break-down of "types" on this forum and MMM, (sigh/smile.)
Where is this chart?

wolf
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Location: Germany

Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by wolf » Fri Jun 28, 2019 11:51 pm

Gilberto de Piento wrote:
Fri Jun 28, 2019 12:52 pm
Where is this chart?
here Personality Test, Temperaments and Types

horsewoman
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by horsewoman » Sat Jun 29, 2019 2:26 am

It's always so sad when someone dies just before retirement age. I first experienced this when I did my apprenticeship (I was 18), the boss of my firm was a fit 50 year old - suddenly he got an aggressive cancer and died within 3 months. It got my thinking, and I believe it influenced my lifestyle (working part time while keeping expenses as low as possible). On the other hand we pretty much left out the accumulation phase and I worry that we have not enough later on. I'm pretty sure that I'll get to be 100, just for the irony of it.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Fri Jul 05, 2019 10:29 pm

I have been doing some thinking myself about the different ways in which women have to pay extra for simple physical security. Like you eventually have to throw down for some combination of dog, gun, man, gated entry, or zip-code with functional police force-pick 2. It's not like men don't have to consider these issues either, but usually the only have to maybe pick 1.
Yeah, this is definitely been more on my mind. I'm really glad I have a garage, rather than a carport, so that my lack of a car doesn't immediately announce "she's not home!!" It's nice reading the crime reports for my street and subdivision and seeing "no crimes reported in the last 6 months." There are some areas near me that aren't so great, but I think the legion of nosy retired folks on my street and in my subdivision tend to keep some potential crime at bay. Before people got used to seeing my car, I got some good long stares from my neighbors out with their dogs. I'm OK with that.

I have a friend who got mugged outside her apartment years ago. She wasn't hurt, but she was really traumatized; the guy acted like he had a gun, though she admits that she wasn't sure that he did not not (is that a gun in your pocket or are you...). He stole her purse, but after that happened, she went out and bought a house in a gated community. It was WAY more than she could realistically afford, but she feels safer with the gate and fence (that anyone could climb). In other words, I think security is probably an illusion, really--I'm not so naive to think someone couldn't rob me in my current house in the next 5 minutes--but it doesn't FEEL so imminent when I don't have creepy looking cars driving up and own the road, and the poor homeless soul sleeping in carports, and the weird neighbor knocking on my door asking for money.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Sat Jul 13, 2019 1:08 pm

I've been doing some thinking and planning, planning and thinking. Had another issue with my mom this week--she's fallen twice and once ended up going to the ER because she bumped her head. She's fine, was released after 9 long hours in the ER--I cannot describe to you how much I hate hospitals and hate the medical system in general, as well as how we treat old people in this country... but that's a subject for another post in the future when I'm pissed off again. But I'm getting ready to go out of town again for work, and I just don't feel comfortable leaving her with no one to call in an emergency. My brother is here, of course, but he works at a job where he's not allowed to have his cell phone on the factory floor, and we just don't have any other family or friends to rely on. So I'm going to pay for some private pay help for her. It's going to be freakin' expensive, and I'm already resenting it, but I don't want my mom to fall and be laying on the floor for 8 hours, either. The caregiver will come in for about 4 hours each day when I'm gone, help her get a shower (mom's having a lot of trouble getting in and out of the shower, and unfortunately thus doesn't shower as often as she would like), make sure she has some lunch, tidy up a bit, and mostly just chat with her and give her some company.

I've also signed a contract with an "ElderCare Consultant." For $80 an hour, billed in 6 minute increments, they will help me navigate the labyrinthine web of services and stuff, and hopefully help me get my mom qualified for TennCare (Tennessee's version of Medicaid) which should provide home health help instead of me paying for it. If we can get her qualified. If not... I don't know how long I can pay for occasional help, and I certainly can't quit my job to care for her right now. Anyway...one thing at at time. Oh yeah, I just bought a wheelchair, too.

I sure wish my mom had saved some money when she was working. She retired at 62 with LITERALLY no money in the bank, a $109/month pension, a mortgage payment, and a social security check of $1900 a month. 20 years later, she still has a mortgage and no equity in the house (I still cannot decipher what the hell she did 10 years ago on a refinance deal), still no money in the bank, and still with a $109/pension and a social security check of $1900 a month. (Actually, now that I think about it, when she was 62 she was also still getting alimony from my dad: $300 a month). My mom would be in much better shape if she'd been less spendy, had saved some money when she was working, and had paid off her mortgage before she retired. Not great, but better.

I know I will keep working as long as my mom's alive, for a lot of different reasons. One: she needs money from me, and if I stopped working, my budget would have a lot less play in it. Two: I do not want to be a full time caregiver for my mom, and she doesn't want me to be, either, though she would like me to spend more time with her, I know, and sometimes I feel the same. When we have good moments, they're very good. She's told me a dozen times how nice it was to come over to my house at 4th of July, and it really was nice. Three: at some point, I'll also have to help my brother out, and four: I'm just not QUITE ready to quit working completely right now, though I'd have no trouble quitting my current job for something else... but the money's too good. If I gotta work right now, I might as well make a lotta money...

Anyway... I know that my mom's situation makes me MUCH more conservative with respect to my not-so-early retirement thoughts. I'm pretty sure I'd take my chances right now--or even 5 years ago--if I hadn't seen first hand the effect of not having enough money can have when you get old. Learning about things like Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security, supplemental insurance plans, drug plans, long term care, home health aides... GAH. It's ridiculous, it shouldn't be so hard, so complicated or so expensive, but the fact is, it is that hard, in the United States anyway. I am pretty sure if/when I get to my mom's stage in life/health, I'm going to want to just pull the plug. I won't have wonderful kids like me (ha, ha!) to look after me, and I just don't think being planted in an easy chair watching stupid TV between doctor's appointments is a good way to live. It's also really brought home to me the importance of friends and keeping going and doing things--my mom never had a lot of friends, was always kind of proud of not being a "joiner," but I can see the effects of that now. I've always been similar--happy to have a small group of very close friends, and not always in the same town, but when you get older, your connections drop off, so it's important to have quite a few of them, and to work on making more. Just this week one of my neighbors in my new area knocked on my door and invited me to a pot luck and ladies' card night. I can't go because I'll be out of town, but I very earnestly asked her to invite me next time. I actually sort of hate stuff like that, but I'm coming to see the value of getting to know my neighbors, if for nothing else than having someone to check my mail if I'm out of town. I'm not an introvert, but I'm not a total extrovert either -- I actually come down right in the middle--but I use all my extrovert energy at work, I think, that I'm a hermit at home. I need to be less so, and am very conscious of that.

So all of this is on my mind as I spent my first full week in my new job. Which may be a big pain in the ass. I know it takes up to 6 months to get used to a new job, even if it's a job you've had in the past--which I have, with the same company, even. I know it will get better, but this week felt frantic, with personnel issues galore. My boss is a pretty good guy, I think, and he checks in pretty often to see how it's going, but I've been brutally reminded this week of what I previously found frustrating about being a manager--the fact that I can do the job better, and it's hard to get people to do what you want them to do, how you want them to do it, and that I need to remember to have patience, not be too demanding, and be okay with people not doing things the same way I would. I have to say for the most part my team is excellent--I have worked with 3 of them for years and they are on total auto pilot--very experienced people who don't need me at all except for an occasional approval for something over their authority. The other folks, though, are newer with little experience, and in my opinion, too big a work load and I have no control over that. Oh, and the contractor quit. So.... yeah. It'll get better, and they do seem like they are good workers who want to learn and want to do a good job, so that's three quarters of the situation that's really good. I just have to keep reminding myself of that!!

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Dream of Freedom
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Dream of Freedom » Sat Jul 13, 2019 2:13 pm

I know I will keep working as long as my mom's alive, for a lot of different reasons. One: she needs money from me, and if I stopped working, my budget would have a lot less play in it. Two: I do not want to be a full time caregiver for my mom, and she doesn't want me to be, either
You should change the name of the thread to too many obligations to retire young.

7Wannabe5
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Mon Jul 15, 2019 1:23 pm

wrote: I am pretty sure if/when I get to my mom's stage in life/health, I'm going to want to just pull the plug.
Ditto. Even though I do have wonderful kids. In fact, I don't think there is any point in even continuing to attempt to be frugal at our age if we aren't willing to pull the plug at appropriate juncture. I guess we could make attempt to round up significantly younger, extremely kind and devoted, long-term partners, but that seems sort of unlikely and cruel.

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