Too Old To Retire "Young"

Where are you and where are you going?
Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Sat Aug 11, 2018 6:25 am

I was offered sex in exchange for a Home Depot shed just a few years back. And I didn't even have to assemble it.

Things have really gone up.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Sat Aug 11, 2018 8:08 am

Right, so keep him in your life, AND start dating so you can find another guy who can fulfill your needs/wants/druthers that he isn't ;) You might be surprised at the results. Notice that he isn't holding you to a contract of monogamy, you are holding you to a contract of monogamy. Trust me, I get this, but it might be worth at least going to the trouble of trying to untangle why you are doing this.
Yeah, I’m actually working on that. Or thinking about working on that. It’s just 1) that’s never been my way and 2) it’s a damn lot of trouble and 3) having dated in Memphis I can attest to the fact that the selection is poor (lotta Bible thumpers, college football nuts and rabid Republicans).

No, at my advanced age I have come to understand that one person doesn’t necessarily give you everything you want/need, and I’m single and not interested in marriage. But probably still old fashioned enough to not want to sleep around, plus too lazy to look very hard for someone, AND too busy to be with someone that’s going to want a ton of my time.

It will all work out, of that I’m certain—it’s just a transition period for me, I think. But it’s good to know xDBF is there, too. It reassures me.

(He can have pretty much any, um, intimate act he’d like. Problem is, he probably won’t ask).

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Sat Aug 11, 2018 8:46 am

Really? I was thinking of how much I'd put out for 9K of work. I figured it would no different than going to prison but at least I'd come home to a new kitchen.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Sat Aug 11, 2018 10:08 am

I figured it would no different than going to prison but at least I'd come home to a new kitchen.
Not the worst prison to go to!

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Sat Aug 11, 2018 10:20 am

Well, they don't call it hard time for nothing.

So this "do 9K of repair on your house without expecting sexual favors in return" guy, what gives? Pics of him in your underwear?

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Sat Aug 11, 2018 11:40 am

So this "do 9K of repair on your house without expecting sexual favors in return" guy, what gives?
I’d love for someone to explain it to me. I have theories, but the bottom line is that he’s a great guy for helping me out. We’d probably do just about anything for the other one. “Go with the flow” is my new mantra here.

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Sat Aug 11, 2018 1:33 pm

Theories:

(1) He's like Tom Cruise Born On The Fourth of July balls shot off in battlefield impotent;
(2) He's devoutly religious and believes home improvement is the pathway to righteousness;
(3) Long con;
(4) His present domestic situation is Suo level unbearable and subsequently he will do anything to get out of the house including providing 9K of work for free;
(5) You are a nice person but so hideously unattractive he finds it necessary to take pity upon you;
(6) He's a nice person but so hideously unattractive that even after doing 9K of work on a chick's home for free he still doesn't feel worthy of being blown;
(7) He has suffered some unspeakable tragedy and endeavors to do anything to get his mind off of it;
(8) He's Jesus Christ and wants to get in some carpentry work before he fucks shit up for good;
(9) He's a serial killer and is preparing a kill room in your house;
(10) He's like one of those semi-retarded yet still handy hunkish type of men who Meredith Baxter Birney hires and ultimately sleeps with in Oxygen Network specials;

Gun to my head, I'd go with #4 and/or #9.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Sat Aug 11, 2018 7:32 pm

(4) His present domestic situation is Suo level unbearable and subsequently he will do anything to get out of the house including providing 9K of work for free;
(5) You are a nice person but so hideously unattractive he finds it necessary to take pity upon you;
Pretty sure it’s not #4, unless he’s hiding it really well. (Actually, I think he’s bored, so why not a small project)
#5 is my fear.
#1.... well, no comment. He’s older than I am (but it was Jake in “sun also rises” where it was blown off. I think Tom Cruise was just paralyzed).

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7Wannabe5
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Sun Aug 12, 2018 7:13 am

Oh, most women would fret about #5, but only rarely the core issue. I belonged to a support group for women who were married to men who only rarely wanted to have sex, and some of the group members were knock-out gorgeous.

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Sun Aug 12, 2018 8:20 am

#5 was actually #10 in conception as I felt some obligation to make a list with 10 and I since I didn't consider it a remote likelihood I didn't want it to be #10 as it might add some unintentional significance being read last.

What I find of interest is the #5/#9 dynamic, specifically that the #5 was designated as "greatest fear." So my question is "If you were in the sorority house when Ted Bundy arrived and he passed you over for other girls, would there be some "I lost the beauty pageant" shame mixed in with the "Thank God I didn't end up in the shallow grave" thankfulness. I mean he was essentially a Kennedy who had Joe Sr. 's ambition, John's looks, Bobby's intellect and Ted's moral compass.

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daylen
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by daylen » Sun Aug 12, 2018 8:31 am

11. He installed hidden cameras to spy on you.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Sun Aug 12, 2018 1:22 pm

r." So my question is "If you were in the sorority house when Ted Bundy arrived and he passed you over for other girls, would there be some "I lost the beauty pageant" shame mixed in with the "Thank God I didn't end up in the shallow grave" thankfulness.
Oh, yeah, I’d be totally “What, I’m not good enough for a serial killer? Sheesh.” For a minute, anyway!

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Sun Aug 12, 2018 3:49 pm

If its any consolation, serial killers tend to be highly particular in their selection process so it could be a matter of just not fitting the profile. For instance, if you have at least one person on the planet who might report you as missing within the year, you could be discounted.

I got to thinking how I would respond if I was in a similar situation, in my case a woman saying "Listen, I won't have sex with you, but I'll give you 9K." On the one hand, with the exception of a handful of women, I'd prefer the 9K. On the other hand, it can be interpreted as saying "I'll give you 9K in order that I don't have to have sex with you" which although I still get the 9K, it comes with a swift kick into my self-esteem. It's like sexual severance pay. Even if you didn't like the job, no one likes to get fired.

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7Wannabe5
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Sun Aug 12, 2018 4:44 pm

Not very long ago, my semi-frugal BF and I were indulging in half-off appetizers sans alcohol during happy hour at a very expensive bar/restaurant. What I assumed to be a married couple in their 70s were sitting near us. I overheard a snippet of their conversation, as the woman leaned in closer to her companion, and said "...and, as you know, men have strange pleasures."

I think that about sums it up.

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daylen
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by daylen » Sun Aug 12, 2018 4:52 pm

7Wannabe5 wrote:
Sun Aug 12, 2018 4:44 pm
...and, as you know, men have strange pleasures."
...and, as you know, women spend more on beauty products than food.

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7Wannabe5
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Sun Aug 12, 2018 5:24 pm

@daylen:

True. So, if you want to save money on beauty products, it pays to gain empathy with strange pleasures.

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Mon Aug 13, 2018 5:03 am

I get the feeling that there is one lucky sex robot out there that Daylen is going to make very happy.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by EdithKeeler » Mon Aug 13, 2018 6:29 am

On the other hand, it can be interpreted as saying "I'll give you 9K in order that I don't have to have sex with you" which although I still get the 9K, it comes with a swift kick into my self-esteem. It's like sexual severance pay. Even if you didn't like the job, no one likes to get fired.
Yes. Especially so when you USED to have sex. So “I’ll give you $9k so I won’t have to have sex with you ANYMORE.”

But the no sex thing came before the 9k, so it’s more like “I’m not having sex with you anymore AND I’m giving you 9k...” but not in cash, which would be easier, but in travel, time, labor “because I want to spend time with you and it will be fun.” Which is actually a compliment if you think about it.

I dunno. My new motto is “go with the flow.”

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daylen
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by daylen » Mon Aug 13, 2018 6:40 am

Ha, maybe. I lean far on the asexual side of the spectrum, but a sexy android lady might change that.

Jason
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Re: Too Old To Retire "Young"

Post by Jason » Mon Aug 13, 2018 7:07 am

(@) Daylen

If that's the case, you should be retired in no time.

(@) EK

He obviously still cares for you and it is probably an act of compassion that he does not come out and say "Edith, although my feelings for you have not changed, at this stage in life, I prefer spending the time we have together in a dilapidated house as opposed to your vagina."

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