I Was Once Found But Now I Am Lost

[Henry]

Earthquakes completely knock wildlife on their asses. Whole animal kingdom shuts the fuck up. Humbles those assholes for a few minutes. See how they like being terrorized by a stronger, darker force of nature that has no compunction in fucking their lives up. But now that they've been bullied, they'll probably take it out on me. I noticed the birds flying low. Earthquake protocol is to drop, cover and hold. Except if you're married to me. Then you take selfies and check it off your bucket list. What I noticed during the earthquake is how far away the sound is from the shaking. It wasn't loud where I was. It's also less disconcerting if you are outside. Not all your earthly possessions rattling all over the place. Now we have this bullshit eclipse where you can go blind. Creation seems to be making some type of statement. Hope it goes back to normal. It's putting me on edge. Plus this whole "Where were you during the earthquake?" Well, where I normally am except there was a fucking earthquake. Unless you're that guy in the news who was getting a vasectomy, you were probably just doing normal type of things. Hopefully when I do end up getting mauled by a bear there will be an earthquake and I will be the guy in the news with the caption "Earthquake Saves Man's life."

[Henry]

I think there is a transition from starting pitcher to relief pitcher. To use evolutionary terms, it would be what Stephen Jay Gould called punctuated equilibrium. Things evolve slowly, things appearing like they are in stasis and then, blammo, a marked change. You spend most of your life starting the game, then all of sudden, you are saving the game. It's a completely different job, but just as challenging. The goal is now to preserve the lead. Hopefully, as time progresses, the lead itself increases. So you're not always trying to save a one run game, but you are being called in to save a laugher. Personally, I was a shitty starting pitcher, but I seem to be a good reliever. I guess the final stage is the game is won. And then the final final stage, where the game is over.

[chenda]

I think there is a transition from starting pitcher to relief pitcher. To use evolutionary terms, it would be what Stephen Jay Gould called punctuated equilibrium. Things evolve slowly, things appearing like they are in stasis and then, blammo, a marked change. You spend most of your life starting the game, then all of sudden, you are saving the game. It's a completely different job, but just as challenging. The goal is now to preserve the lead. Hopefully, as time progresses, the lead itself increases. So you're not always trying to save a one run game, but you are being called in to save a laugher. Personally, I was a shitty starting pitcher, but I seem to be a good reliever. I guess the final stage is the game is won. And then the final final stage, where the game is over.

This genuinely struck a cord with me and I thought you should know.

[Henry]

I appreciate that. I was rambling to my therapist in a David Byrne how did I get here kind of way and said something to the extent I am a lifelong fuck up underachiever who scratched off a few winners at an age when I knew they couldn't be wasted anymore. He stated it wasn't unique. That the back of most people's baseball cards do not evidence a Henry Aaron year in and year out consistency but show a handful of couple of big wins along the way that were properly capitalized.

[Henry]

fu. fU. Fu. FU. I think I'm Fu. Or maybe fU+. What I've realized is that FU for most people is not emancipation but domination - I want money to fuck with people not I want money so I won't be fucked by people. I want money so I can send a waiter back with my food or some stupid shit like that.

[Henry]

I am placing a bet on biosimilar. It accounts for 2% of my portfolio. The bet is it will spike to 10%-15% of my portfolio at which point I will sell and place in conservative investments. I am basing my bet on the expertise of two others. I placed many bets in the past. I just did not know I was betting. The inflection point is supposedly this year.

I am placing the bet in the context of the dubious evolutionary theory called punctuated equilibrium popularized by Stephen Jay Gould. I learned of this theory as an English major in the science department of a major US university by a complete wack job. I remember the exact moment. It was at night. My acid head friend sitting next to me. A woman behind us making obscene noises while flashing us her wares. My acid friend would drop out of the course and do acid head types of things and die in his 50's. The woman continued to put on a show throughout the semester. The professor would make anti-homosexual points based on science. I would transfer to another university and flounder through life.

Not withstanding its scientific validity, it explains my situation. As I have struggled throughout life, a few fortuitous albeit somewhat planned investments conflated with an attempt at frugality have propelled us to the poor side of rich. This is the first bet I step in with full cognizance of what I'm doing.

I just experienced a magnitude 2.9 earthquake while writing this. Oldfucksland has not turned out as I anticipated.

[chenda]

I just experienced a magnitude 2.9 earthquake while writing this. Oldfucksland has not turned out as I anticipated.

I was looking at a map of the earthquake and I had no idea that oldfucksland is so close to New York city. In fact I didn't even realise New Jersey abuts it.

Perhaps this is the source of the 80/20 thing.

[Henry]

Geograhically wise, distance wise, Oldfucksland abuts NYC. Time wise, spiritually wise, not so much. I don't really consider it a place to live if you want to take advantage of NYC. I actually use where I live to get out of NYC engagements. Besides bears, earthquakes and the dementia riddled, Oldfucksland also possesses the biggest cows on the planet. I stopped the car the other day to take a pic of one and I realized it was eye fucking me and possibly on the verge of roid rage. I ran back into the car not that this behemoth fucking cow would have any issue ramming a Subaru into a ditch. I showed the pic to the gas attendant and he couldn't believe it. The enormity of this fucking cow. Sultans from Dubai fly into the heliport and select them for their feasts or weddings or whatever they do over there. I knew a prostitute many years ago who got flown to Dubai and she said instead of getting up during dinner these Sultans piss into their chalices. Now I know where her steak came from.

[Henry]

Louis Theroux's "Gambling In Las Vegas" is entertaining and a sober reminder of the significance in the "not" side to saving money. The issue is what is your "not." Most people don't squander $4M on slot machines as one person in the documentary does. The benefits of making things "not" over a lifetime is significant. I decided "not" to buy books. It has saved me money. It's also an easy "not." I have found eating out a harder "not" and will most likely always be a "kind of not." Not's provide predictability and stability. The "doing" is the gambling. Studying for a degree, investing in a stock, marrying, etc. It's all gambling.

[chenda]

I've been having the same thoughts following mine quitting of alcohol. Not drinking, smoking, gambling, drug taking or taking debt is likely to give you a higher ROI than anything else. Most religions have sought to ban these vices.

[jacob]

Most religions have sought to ban these vices.

Too much competition, maybe?

[chenda]

Too much competition, maybe?

Maybe, though I heard an Islamic preacher once saying that if things are haram then it's for your own good and I felt he did have a point. But its interesting how gambling and smoking are taboo amongst the middle classes but alcohol isn't.

@Henry - apropos your large cow I wonder if the hormones they feed them to satisfy the demands of the Dubai sultans end up excreted in the wider food chain and are contributing to your wildlife problem.

[Henry]

Seeing a field of super sized cows has a Jurassic Park type of effect. It makes you stop the car and say "what the fuck." AI might steal your job or write a better term paper. But hundreds of dinosaur sized cows has a real chilling effect. Either wild life is taking over or some ingenious prick is artificially jacking cows 3x their normal size. And I'm not familiar with farming but I always considered a cow a friendly type of animal opposed to a bull or a lion. But the cow eye fucking me looked downright murderous. Oldfucksville has been in the news due to the earthquake. Unfortunately, I was not downtown when the TV crews were there. I would have said fuck the earthquake, have you seen the fucking cows around here. They're the size of monster trucks. You assholes should be investigating that shit.

[chenda]

Its a frightening thought as to where all this supersizing will end up. But Oldfucksville does look rather beautiful. Also looks like a great place for a taxidermy business.

[mountainFrugal]

Also looks like a great place for a taxidermy business.

*Taxidermy/embalming business

[Henry]

I once sold a flower shop. The first time I went we were walking through the building the woman opens a storage room and I scream because there are animal heads all over the place. Deer, bear, raccoons. I said to the lady what the fuck. She said I'm sorry but they are owned by the guy who murdered my husband. I said I'm sorry about that but can you get someone to take the fucking animal heads out of here. No one wants to see this shit. So we start discussing the murder and it turns out her husband was shot in the head by his embezzling partner with a deer rifle. He hid the gun in the refrigerator behind all the bouquets. So now I had to reveal to all potential flower store buyers that someone was murdered in the building because it's mandated by law. I guess people need to contemplate possible retribution. The upshot is I was more disturbed by the taxidemery than the murder. Oldfucksville is naturally beautiful. But people ruin everything that is beautiful in the world so it only goes so far.