Divan dan journal

Where are you and where are you going?
Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

June Update

June Savings Rate: 56%
YTD Savings Rate: 23%

Starting to come back slowly with the savings rate as we bounce back from some of the closing and housing costs. June was artificially high from a savings rate due to my semi-annual bonus, which came at the right time. Food was a bust again, although we did better with eating out. We did hit our discretionary spending goal for June, which was great. We are doing this challenge again in July as we both felt proud when we stayed within our budget.

House projects

We are continuing to learn how to be handy. Our big project at the beginning of the month was installing a hose spigot to the outside and replacing two leaking pipes in the basement. The work entailed removing the old pipe, cutting the line, and popping on the shark bite. We were cautious about measuring so we didn't have to cut again. We had our neighbor's help for the project, and he has been instrumental in giving us the confidence to proceed with some of these projects. At the end of it, we now have two pipes that aren't leaking anymore and a working hose spigot. The second project we had this month was reinstalling the light fixture. This entailed removing the old light and the wiring, reattaching the wiring, installing the light, and plastering and painting around the new light fixture. It was a smaller project, but it gave me some confidence in electrical work.

The rest of the house projects were getting our lawn back to growing after regarding the front and the back. May was extremely dry, but the back half of June had a ton of rain, so I have a lawn again!

Travel

We ended up going to Colorado at the end of June. It was my first time going there. We spent some time at my wife's friend's lake house; I saw Breckenridge, Boulder, Red Rocks, and downtown Denver. I didn't have many expectations going into the trip but I heard the weather was nice and dry. It was pretty hot when we were there, but it didn't feel as hot on the lake, so I got pretty sunburned, given the altitude difference. The lake house and Boulder were my favorite parts of the trip. Denver was OK as it had some pockets of pretty nice neighborhoods but some pockets where it didn't seem as nice. I need a reference for the city pre and post-COVID, but I know there is quite a difference for Philly pre and post-COVID. The trip was great, but on the way back our flight was canceled, and we had to stay an extra 36 hours in Denver. We are now working on getting some of that visit refunded from United so we shall see how that goes.

Tennis

I highlighted in this journal how I was struggling to get in a groove with working out. I finally found this by getting back into tennis again. From a cost perspective, it is pretty cheap; I just had to get a racquet and a few cans of balls. We are playing outside now, but it might get a bit more expensive when the weather turns, as I will have to find a way to play indoors. I got connected with this group that regularly plays now, so I am playing 3/4 times a week and getting that heart/cardio workout with a little muscle building. Tennis is hitting a few things for me: exercise, skill development, and focus training. The other great thing is that tennis has more runway to play for a long time. I didn't see that with soccer since it is a contact sport, and injuries are rampant. I am looking forward to continuing to find my swing and get better.

Zelda

I beat Zelda in June. It was a great game that had my attention but was just long. There is a sweet spot for me with games in the 20-35 hour range. I know I got a lot of value out of Zelda but it started to feel grindy towards the end. Regardless I enjoyed the adventure and story.

July

We have a weekend trip planned to the beach but otherwise are just staying local for most of the month. I will continue to exercise and play tennis and try to improve my diet mindfully. For July, I will have a drinking challenge where I try and limit alcohol to a few drinks per week. I will also try to improve my snacking choices, which is holding me back from losing a few pounds. Otherwise just trying to enjoy the summer before the weather gets cold, although the smoke/wildfires have been a stark reminder of what the future weather looks like. Thanks for reading!

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

July Update

July Savings Rate: 36%
YTD Savings Rate: 25%

I thought we were out of the woods with house expenses, but unfortunately, that was not the case in July. We had to have someone come out and fix our AC units that cool the back of the house. Unfortunately, they are new units, but the installation job was not done properly. I also didn't have the tools or wherewithal to fix this myself or attempt to fix this myself.

In addition, we had a number of expenses that hit the health category this month (therapy sessions as well as acupuncture that has been helping my wife). To cap it off, we had another rough month in the food expense line that we are reexamining and doing a good job with so far for the month of August.

Net Worth has reached an all-time high since we combined finances at the start of the year. We are at the point where the investment changes are really starting to outpace any savings changes. This takes some of the pressure off of saving a high amount, but I still want to be as efficient and logical as possible.

GTD

Work has been extremely frustrating from a number of perspectives, and this project I am running (due diligence) is dragging on and will drag on throughout the whole summer. On the flip side, I am still not working more than 50 hours a week, but there are a lot more time challenges (late-night weekly meetings with Japan being a big one). The phase of this project has shifted from analysis and modeling work (which I love) to more project management (which I don't). With that, I have had to really stay on top of my to-do list not to carry the mental load of all of my deliverables. I have done a good job of following some of the GTD principles and capturing everything (personal and work) into a tool that has really cut down on general stress. It works!

Internal Work

One of the things my wife and I both spend a decent amount of money on is therapy, which has been worth every penny for me. I have been working with someone for the past year, and the benefit of working through and processing this has been impactful for me. A lot of it has focused on traditional talk therapy and family dynamics but recently has shifted to work around my anxiety/OCD. With that, my therapist suggested I read "The Body Keeps the Score," which talks about trauma and how it sits in the body. The last session focused on EMDR, which is one of the modalities the book talks about, and I am interested in what direction this will go. I am still also in the process of finishing the book, but I am looking forward to continuing the process of working in this modality.

Hobbies

I am still playing tennis and played 10 or 11 times this past month. In addition, we got a few games of pickleball going as well. It was nice because my wife was able to hop right in and have fun with it. I think any activity that gets you moving and is fun is a win in my book.

We also got hooked on this board game called Azul which has been fun to learn and play with my wife. It's a simple tile-building game that has a lot of interesting strategic components to it.

Last but not least, my wife bought me a ping pong table, continuing the tradition of getting into all racquet sports. I am looking forward to setting this up and playing with my wife. It'll be nice to have another activity that gets us away from screens and especially nice to have something semi-physical we can do inside the house when it starts to get colder.

August

Reel in food spending and regular shopping ( we have been doing good with this challenge)
Continue to play tennis and stay active
Finish the book and continue the process of working in this modality to learn more about trauma and its effects on my anxiety/OCD etc.

ertyu
Posts: 2893
Joined: Sun Nov 13, 2016 2:31 am

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by ertyu »

hell yea therapy :muscle: I hope emdr proves helpful

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

Thanks, Ertyu. I spent some time working with her on IFS stuff as well which proved to be useful as another relational point but really want to hone in with her on EMDR to see where it goes.

ertyu
Posts: 2893
Joined: Sun Nov 13, 2016 2:31 am

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by ertyu »

the key i've found, at least for myself, is to open up to what comes up rather than, as is my instinct, clamp down against it. whether this makes sense i've no ides; these are verbal descriptions to non-verbal inner states, so who knows. Anyway: good luck!

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

August Update

August Savings Rate: 35%
YTD Savings Rate: 26%

A longer update

Between the closing costs on the house, house projects, and some health-related expenses my wife is going through right now, I have set a target of a 25% savings rate for this year. It is a lot lower than what I was hoping for, and it very well may end up higher than that, but we are contending with some pretty large unavoidable expenses that have occurred every month. 25% is a lower savings rate than you would expect on this forum, but I am not going to beat myself up too much about it, as it is still letting us save some money each month. In addition, some of the things I am going to cover feel a bit more pertinent for me to work through, so I am not giving the savings rate too much energy right now.

I think what we can control, though, is reeling in our discretionary spending as well as food spending, which we were successful with this month as our goal. It feels good when some of the other categories are coming in higher than you would like, and it feels like a win overall.

Books

I read two books this month, "How to Do Things" by David Cain and "The Body Keeps the Score". The first book was just a short little PDF that combines the Pomodoro Technique with visualizing success. I enjoyed it as it put gates around productivity, which I struggle with occasionally. This centers around sometimes taking a bit more downtime with work than I would like to recharge, and it is an issue that pops up occasionally with self-directed knowledge work and WFH. I think three years post the start of COVID, I would say that I am more productive at home than I am in the office, especially considering my office is the open office plan concept where it is really hard to focus.

Internal Work (EMDR/Therapy)

The second book I finished is The Body Keeps the Score, and it might be one of the more pertinent books I have read for my situation. The book centers around trauma, where I have experienced big trauma and little trauma. The big trauma centers around being a war refugee and essentially being transplanted as a young kid leaving a war-torn country. I can't be certain what effect this has had on me as I don't remember that much of it. The little trauma is what I am working through, though, which centers primarily around family dynamics and conditioned responses to dealing with individuals in my family. After reading the book, this really connected the dots on a lot of things that I experienced and why I have had success with talk therapy but why it hasn't gotten to the root of the issue. The book covers the topics beautifully, but this little trauma has really shed light on my anxiety and the fight-or-flight response that I experience with seemingly minor events.

I think this little trauma, but the quantity of it, has really prevented me from being fully present in my body as well. One of the modalities that the book covers is EMDR, which is what I have done in a few sessions with my therapist and will continue to do. Without getting exactly into it, you work with a therapist, going through mental images and feelings while watching a ball bounce across a screen. There is something around watching the ball and the sound of it that triggers a deeper level of an emotional state that lets you reprocess the trauma and the feelings around it. The sets spur some crazy mental images and feelings, but then, as you progress, it lets you reprocess those feelings, and the edge of it wears off. This also means that you have to feel those feelings more intensely in your body before you can reprocess it. Overall, I am thrilled about the direction this is going and have felt more subtle shifts, such as checking in with the feelings but also feeling the feelings vs. pushing them away or trying to outlogic it. Overall, it has let me be a bit more present and has helped me not replay these stories multiple times and the rumination associated with it. It is also a process that is not overnight, so the journey will be interesting.

Thoughts on consumption

I think this low-buy-spending goal has made me reexamine my relationship with consumption. I have definitely bought less, but I still find myself buying new books with a stack of unread ones. It has me buying video games when they go on digital sales with a digital stack of unplayed games. I think I need to sit with the feelings around why I feel the compulsion to buy, similar to the concept of why I am snacking or eating when I am already full. Easier said than done. I have been revisiting some of the No Buy threads as well. My current challenge has me spending less than $50 on discretionary spending (pretty much just Amazon, in my case). I still let myself buy things for and around the house, such as weed killer, etc.

Exercise

The summer tennis season is starting to wrap up. I want to express my happiness in picking up the sport again at the start of the summer. It allowed me to get out of an exercise rut by getting back into a game I enjoyed as a high schooler. Overall, I think I averaged playing around 3/4 times a week this summer, which was great with the hectic work schedule as well as some of the travel plans we had. Looking towards the fall season, I will still try and play outside for as long as I can (contending with the days getting shorter and colder). I am also looking to join a tennis club that has weekly round-robin tournaments, which seem fun, in addition to a weekly Sunday league that takes place at the club. I want to keep this going as it has been helpful with getting cardio in, slimming down a little bit, and just staying active.

My wife and I have also been playing a ton of ping pong on our table. This has been a great way to get some quick games in after having dinner and just another way to get a little bit of movement in our day. I have a few friends who play that I will also look forward to having over to play a little bit.

Goals and looking ahead

Keep the food and low-buy goals going
Continue to explore the work around EDMR and internal work
Start up Qigong again

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

Mid-November Update

YTD (Oct) Savings Rate %: 24%

November should be a decent month from a savings rate % as there are no major planned house projects, and my semi-annual bonus is coming in November. As mentioned earlier, there are health expenses my wife is going through now, but we have already hit our deductible for the rest of this year. We also spent our fair share on traveling as well as some other house projects in September and October. The rest of the year should be quiet from a spending standpoint, and I hope to be above that 25% savings rate.

A few weeks ago, I went back and revisited several of my goldmines. These are chapters 5 and 6 of ERE, the Stoa presentation, and the Guardian buy nothing articles, as well as Axel's site. I think the concepts have started to come together, and the ERE book keeps showing its timeless nature of advice. For the next quarter, I have implemented a low buy policy to really ensure I am thinking about and solving for items the right way (throwing competence at it, identifying needs & wants).

I have also gone through several threads that are helpful in me making that leap from WL5 to WL6, decentralizing FI, yields and flows. I think the concept I keep going back to is at some point; it needs to move from theory to practice. I really need to force myself to get creative, which is what I am hoping the low buy will help force.

I am also going through the WOG and fishbone exercises, but I am struggling to internalize and understand both. I think the main reason is that my WOGs are essentially all of my hobbies on a page and do not establish the interconnectedness of the goals minus simple ones such as cooking at home saves money and is good for health.

From a mind perspective, I have picked up meditation again and have done 10/15 minutes of see, hear, feel meditation over the past month or so. It is quite counterintuitive, but not trying to focus has been better for my focus than focusing. See, Hear, Feel is just a form of insight meditation noting what is coming up with the labels of see, hear, and feel. It has been great as a form of peace and quiet and disconnecting from screens and from the frantic nature of everything else. I plan on continuing to do this but also to slowly extend the time to 30 minutes to allow myself to go deeper.

I am still playing tennis 2/3 times a week, and minus the occasional weekend match outdoors, tennis has shifted to indoors. I got my proper rating and signed up for a few different singles and doubles groups. It averages out to about 20 dollars for two hours, which is not cheap but not terrible.

Otherwise, we are going into holidays, which will be nice because work has been crazy and definitely extending some nights into the late hours.

My focus will be on getting creative with some of my problem-solving (cooking, low buy) to really synthesize and apply the ideas. Meditation will also continue to be a key cornerstone habit, as well as playing tennis.

AxelHeyst
Posts: 2118
Joined: Thu Jan 09, 2020 4:55 pm
Contact:

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by AxelHeyst »

What’s been your approach to WoGs and fishbones?

I found it useful to sit down with a big piece of paper and quickly draw out as many fishbone sketches quick enough that I didn’t take time to overthink it as I could, getting in 6-12 sketches per piece of paper. The key is don’t be too precious about getting them ‘right’. And jump from one activity to another in whichever activity pops into my head. Sort of stream of consciousness diagramming. And then to sit back and just… look at them. And see if any connections between them occur to me. Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

Then throw it away and maybe make another batch in a few days. The connections that pop out might start to look sort of weblike after a while…

This isn’t the ‘right’ way to do it, just one method I found brought me some new insights after not getting much from a more one at a time approach. I also think it’s useful to think really hard and thoroughly on just one at a time, looking for less obvious 1st and 2nd order effects.

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

For WoG's, I have taken a few turns on it and understand it, but it is essentially five value boxes (disconnecting, resilience, relationships, being healthy, and learning) with the nodes all connected. The issue is it just feels like activities and hobbies with no overall connection (which is maybe OK?).

I reread some of the threads, especially the WL 5 > 6 one, and Jacob mentioned that the different forms of capital are more akin to the 5>6 leap.

For the fishbones, I will try your idea tonight, but do I create a fishbone for the activity I am doing, the goal I am trying to achieve, or both? I.e., do I create a fishbone for meditation or a fishbone for peace of mind as the goal? I think I am struggling to conceptualize the process, but maybe that means I should do it and figure it out.

Any help or guidance on threads I can read through would be extremely helpful. Thanks!

AxelHeyst
Posts: 2118
Joined: Thu Jan 09, 2020 4:55 pm
Contact:

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by AxelHeyst »

I typically make fish bones with the activity/behavior I do or am considering doing, draw a line to the zeroth order effect aka my main Why, and then go from there with first and second order effects up or down. But try it both ways.

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

OK this was very helpful. I did ten or so last night quickly focusing on the activity. I did a positive line and any negative association with that and a negative line with anything that can be counteracted with that as a positive. I have no idea if I did it right but I saw a lot of my values pop up on the fishbones that centered around learning/building skills or saving money. I can see how the fish bones and WOGs correlate now.

I will keep doing these for topics I missed and then revisit the same topics a few weeks from now and see if I come up with any new connections. Thanks again!

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divandan journal

Post by Divandan »

November Update

November Savings Rate: 57%
YTD Savings Rate: 28%

November was a great month as it relates to saving since my semi-annual bonus came in, and we didn't have any large health or housing expenses. I am not much of a gift giver, but my wife is, and her shopping was done this month for gifts. I also didn't fight this very hard, but we got a new vacuum cleaner.

As mentioned in the earlier thread, I reread chapters 4, 5, and 6 of the ERE book and revisited several threads that are a gold mine (yields and flows, no buy, decentralizing finance, and WL 5-6). I think there is value in rereading these threads several times over and over again but then reapplying them to your life. To me, this is most easily accomplished by a low buy, creative cooking, and insourcing house projects. I am squarely in the WL 5 camp as everything still centers so heavily around financial capital and throwing money at problems. Application has to be the name of the game going forward.

Books

I read Digital Minimalism in November, which was a reread for me and more of a refresh.

I am currently reading Life without Technology by Mark Boyle, and it is fantastic. I forget which journal referenced it, but I am really enjoying it. I do wonder if I should have read The Moneyless Man first, as that was written ten years prior to this. One of the things that stuck out to me was that Mark had a high degree of skills already built up before he disconnected completely. You can tell he is quite resourceful and has a high degree of competence based on his ability to solve problems. That, to me, was the most inspiring part, and I think "extreme" ideas/concepts like this also appeal to me. I do wonder if he was able to retain some portion of technology still to get the benefits (i.e, using a phone for one hour during the week to catch up with everyone), but that would not have been the point he was trying to achieve, which was a complete removal of it. Also, maybe there is such a reaction to his practice because of the difference between our Wheaton levels.

The rest of December will be tied to reading Micromastery, Radical Simplicity, and the Inner Game of Tennis. I saw Micromastery was recommended here and referenced in a few threads, so I am excited to get into that. I started the Inner Game of Tennis before and didn't finish it for one reason or another, so it will be nice to finish that. This is for its direct benefits to my tennis improvement as well as how it aligns with mindfulness. I watched that Dan Price video shared below again and will also read Radical Simplicity in December as well.

At the start of the new year, I plan on changing gears and throwing in more fiction books. One of my values is the art of disconnecting, and I think reading fiction books vs. self-improvement/non-fiction books will be a nice change of pace. I already have some Sci-Fi books picked out for the new year (Neuromancer, The Dispossessed, and Hyperion). With that said, there are a few nonfiction books I still want to read, such as Tao Te Ching and something on gardening, as I gear up for the spring. If there are any books you recommend, please send them my way!

Low buy

Adding low buy next month to one of my goals but making it a quarterly challenge (well, four months since I am starting it in December). I found what I was doing with the monthly low-buy challenges was just saving the item to buy the next month, which defeats the purpose of the whole thing, which is utilizing more of your creativity to solve problems. I am not going hardcore on this, but I do hope some of it still transpires into a meaningful change.

I have such a queue built up of books and video games I haven't even touched that I think a low buy should help in this category as I actually get through my stacks.

Guitar

With the weather getting colder, I have been practicing and playing guitar more. I have been playing for a long time, but for the past two years with my guitar teacher, we have really been focusing on improvising. It is really the way I enjoy playing as well since it doesn't rely on memorizing a song. What I usually do is bust out my looper and play over that or just record a chord structure on my phone and do some improvisation on that. The parallel I see to this is I had to really practice getting better at the skill of improvisation. I have to apply that same thinking to some of these lifestyle decisions (cooking creatively with the ingredients I have on hand and figuring out alternatives to just buying things). Without practicing, I will never get a chance to exercise that "muscle".

The guitar also aligns with my WOG of learning and disconnecting, as it is a beautiful hobby that gets me away from a screen. I've actually been printing out guitar chords for songs to keep my phone away when I play, which really helps with that immersion.

Other ramblings

I am going to start researching how to get a garden started in the spring. I don't have a ton of space in the backyard, but I do have enough space to start a little garden.

Resharing this Dan Price video again as he seems to be living most of the principles that ERE talks about and that I would like to live. This video was beautiful, and his drawings remind me of MountainFrugal's drawings:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdLAM-w ... x=4&t=122s

December

Looking forward to the holidays with some time away from work. I will continue to play tennis twice a week, which means I get some more vigorous exercise now that the days are shorter and I am not outside as much. Otherwise, I'm just looking forward to spending time with family and really absorbing the holiday spirit (minus all the consumeristic aspects of it).

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

I have been reading a lot about gardening, and I want to get into it this spring, but have also been reading a lot about permaculture (with the plan to read Permaculture Principles).

I was just thinking about chapter 4 of ERE, which talks about the different forms of capital. The reason I bring that up is the general convergence of the ideas between ERE and permaculture. It made me think and reconfirm how most people default to financial capital and solving all problems through the financial capital lens. If you really think about it, it is just a narrow way of thinking and looking at the world.

Anyway, I found this article interesting, which is permaculture themed but does a great job of diving into the other forms of capital:

https://www.7thgenerationdesign.com/cre ... nt-wealth/

AxelHeyst
Posts: 2118
Joined: Thu Jan 09, 2020 4:55 pm
Contact:

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by AxelHeyst »

Thanks for sharing that article Divandan. I think you're entirely right about the convergence between ERE and permaculture (I think Jacob has described them as almost the same thing, just with different initial positions and failure modes? ERE fails to FIRE, permaculture fails to organic gardening.)

I really liked this:
Strong cultures are 7th generation systems that create socially and economically fulfilling lives for their inhabitants, whose daily activity patterns regenerate natural ecosystems and increase living capital year over year, such that the economic and social value of natural ecosystems is always increasing, and the value-ing of those systems is transmitted intact across generations.
(I'm also starting to realize how much of a hub of sustainability San Luis Obispo area has been for a while. I didn't realize at the time when I went to school there because I didn't know any different... I figured all universities must offer minors in Sustainable Environments? Jim Merkel of Radical Simplicity also spent time there. Must be something in the water.)

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

There is a lot of cross-pollination and serendipity going on for sure! Another interesting overlap that just occurred to me. I was reading The Tao te Ching (Stephen Mitchell translation), and then after I finished that, I picked up Wild Mind. Who do we have mentioned right in the opening chapter of the East facet but Lao Tzu and the Tao te Ching.

Maybe my mind is trying to find the connections, or there is some greater convergence going on!

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

December Update

December Savings Rate: 50%
YTD Savings Rate: 30%

% TTM covered by NW @ 4%: 23%
This metric is essentially what % our TTM spends of NW is covered at a 4% withdrawal rate. This is a new metric but one that should go up over time once some of the larger expenses in our TTM go away (closing costs, health expenses, etc.). It is good to have here, so I can't hide behind the theory.

Low Buy and Buy Nothing

I joined the buy-nothing group for my area. It was fun to give away some items, knowing that they were going to someone locally. It was a bit of a pain to coordinate, especially since there is a free store in town that I can just donate to much more easily. I will say when I need an item, I will keep an eye on what is getting posted there instead of buying it. There should be no rush to buy an item, and this way, I can exercise a little creativity in trying to solve a problem or satisfy a want in other ways.

From a discretionary spending standpoint, I hit my low buy goal this month. Other than buying a few used books, I didn't buy anything else. The books I did buy I am confident I will reread or at least re-reference after reading them.

Books

Books I read this month:

Building a Better World in Your Backyard- I enjoyed this book, and it hit home that the two biggest things you create from a waste perspective are how much energy you use and how your food is procured. I'd say the other thing I enjoyed about it was that the ethos was very much aligned with ERE, with taking action in your backyard and a sense of agency.

Radical Simplicity (Dan Price)- This was a short read, and it had cool images in it that were drawn by Dan. I don't think this book did anything new from a reading perspective for me, but what I did get out of it was that Dan had a zest for life and a passion for pursuing his lifestyle, which just happened to include building little housing structures on the property that he was living on. I would say the one sad thing was that it drove a wedge between him and his wife (at the time), and it seemed that he really wanted her to understand his choice of lifestyle—otherwise, a fun little read.

Micromastery- started to read it and stopped. The book seemed very interesting, but it is just not something I want now, as I am focusing on getting deep into a few topics currently.

Radical Simplicity (Jim Merkel)- There were a lot of books I have read that have touched on the ecological impacts of your lifestyle, but none to this degree. I appreciated thinking about all the ways/quantifying the ways my lifestyle has an impact. I also enjoyed the concept that earning more means you are consuming more (since the average person spends pretty much what they earn). I didn't do the full quantification of my lifestyle, but I did go through the quiz. Unsurprisingly, I scored lower than the average American, but I can do way better. I also liked the tie-in of his method with YMOL. You can see the impact that book had on so many people. Overall I'd say I enjoyed this one.

Tao te Ching/ The Tao of Pooh- I read these together and was hopping back and forth between them. The Tao of Pooh was more literal, but the Tao Te Ching was beautiful, and so much was contained within a few sentences. I read both years ago, but it was nice to go back to them again. For the Tao Te Ching, I was reading Stephen Mitchell's translation. What I will do is probably just leave the Tao te Ching out and read a few verses each day.

I will also read Zhuang Zi in the new year, as that is another core text in Taoism. At this point, I am well versed in Taoism/Buddhism and the concepts they outline, but it is something that you have to live and experience every day. I will focus on two concepts to try and keep it simple. One is simplicity, and that, for me, is a continual process of paring down, fighting against the build-up, and then paring down again. Another concept is the art of effortless effort. For me, this can be most easily tied to tennis. When you are tight and striving and are putting a lot of pressure on yourself, you are tense and more likely to make mistakes. Compare this to when you are playing loose, not thinking as much, being present, and having fun. You are more likely to hit the hard shots and, overall, just have a better match. For anyone who hasn't read the Tao Te Ching, I highly recommend it.

Wild Mind- I see Bill Plotkin talked about on this forum a fair bit. I started to read this book this month but didn't finish it, so I will provide my review in the next journal update. I can already tell that his work is incredible and ties in a few concepts seamlessly for me, as it is all-encompassing.

Most impactful books of 2023

Goodbye, Things- reread
Tiny Habits
ERE- reread
YMOL- reread, but it has been a good 10 years
David Goggin's new book
The Body Keeps the Score
Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up
Tao Te Ching- reread

Reading and Focus going forward

There is a convergence of ideas that keep presenting themselves that I will continue to focus on to draw connections to. This will be in no particular order, but Taoism/Buddhism, simplicity, minimalism, philosophy, permaculture, and systems thinking, with some fiction books thrown in.

I have a few books lined up that I am excited to read (Permaculture Principles, Surviving the Future, One Man's Wilderness, another Bill Plotkin book, Antifragile, Zhuangzi, Hyperion).

I am not sure I am on to anything new, but I am already seeing the connections to Taoism and Permaculture with achieving that flow state, not fighting against nature and effortless effort. Excited to keep drawing the connections but also living it going forward. I do wonder if I am skipping a step, though since there is so much more I can still optimize from a cost perspective, but this is where I have a lot of enthusiasm.

Restriction as a form of Freedom

I have been thinking about this and how restriction is usually seen as removing freedom, but I see it as gaining freedom in a way. It is so easy to buy something or go to the store for something, but having restrictions opens up different avenues and sometimes has added benefits.

Examples:
  • Fasting opens up an avenue for your body to get a rest but also for you to realize you don't need to eat every four hours
  • Setting a space limit. I have a bookshelf that if it is filled I would have to donate or get rid of a book for a new one to fit. This makes me think do I need another book if I have a few books on this shelf that haven't been read and that I would have to donate? Similar concept to my small closet, if I buy another piece of clothing, I would have to get rid of another piece of clothing
This is why a low buy has been successful, as it makes me realize how much I have already.

Gardening

I created a little garden set up this month to grow some herbs. The only expenditure for this was a few seeds and one grow light bulb. I figured this would be a good way to get into the routine before I move the activity outdoors in the spring. I also thought, let's start small and see how much I like it first before getting more overzealous with my ambitions. I will most likely build a raised garden bed in the spring to start.

Neccesity

I have been thinking about how necessity is a component in accelerating your goals. There is a fair amount of slack in our budget, which is nice, but it also feels that the crowbar approach doesn't work as well if there is no necessity. With everything going on this year (closing a house, health expenses, new appliances, necessary home renovations, and a somewhat expensive vacation), we were still able to save 30% this year. The low buy has been great as it sets the gates around a goal, but I just haven't been able to do that with our food spending. That is the next biggest spend that could really increase our savings, but we just haven't found the need to slash it, but I do want to. Will go back to the drawing board in the new year.

Gaming

I have been playing Super Mario Wonder and having a lot of fun with it. The game is a 2D platformer but incredibly creative with its world-building. My BIL 100% it so I want to do the same. I don't go for 100% with most games, but it is fun to do it occasionally as it extends the life of the game significantly.

Goals for January

Continue low buy spending
Start gratitude practice again- It is very much unlike me, but I have been comparing myself to others more frequently, and I feel that gratitude is a way to quell it
Dry January- two drinks per week
Healthy Snack each night- try and replace some of my junk food habits with a healthy snack

bookworm
Posts: 23
Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 6:19 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by bookworm »

Divandan wrote:
Tue Jan 02, 2024 8:57 am
Fasting opens up an avenue for your body to get a rest but also for you to realize you don't need to eat every four hours[/list]
I'm curious about your approach. Do you focus on morning or night? I haven't ever really tried it apart from a meditation retreat where skipping dinner was (lightly) encouraged.
Divandan wrote:
Tue Jan 02, 2024 8:57 am
Start gratitude practice again- It is very much unlike me, but I have been comparing myself to others more frequently, and I feel that gratitude is a way to quell it
What method are you planning to use? Thinking about one thing a day in a journal and regularly reviewing what's there?

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

Regarding fasting, I used to be more meticulous about it, using an app to track my fasting window, etc. Now, on most work days, I will just skip breakfast and lunch and eat normally during the dinner window. The biggest benefit I noticed is tied to the late afternoon work crash. I don't find myself as tired post lunch.

For gratitude, there are a lot of great prompts, and Huberman recently shared one recently as well. I found that the five-minute journal I bought a while back had a lot of unused pages, so I will use that.

The prompts for this morning were:
I am grateful for (three lines)
What would make today great? (three lines)
Daily affirmations. I am... (one line)

In the evening, the prompts are:
3 amazing things that happened today (three lines)
How could I have made today even better? (one line)

I have done this before in a regular journal, just doing three things I am grateful for. I do think it works as a more positive reframing.

bookworm
Posts: 23
Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 6:19 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by bookworm »

Divandan wrote:
Wed Jan 03, 2024 9:18 am
Now, on most work days, I will just skip breakfast and lunch and eat normally during the dinner window.
Here I was thinking of skipping dinner, but the reverse works too!

Thanks for sharing the prompts. I like the idea of doing a morning / evening routine for gratitude. And answering those questions could be easily "stacked" with an existing journaling or meditation habit.

Divandan
Posts: 79
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2020 7:57 pm

Re: Divan dan journal

Post by Divandan »

January Update

January Savings Rate: 1%
YTD Savings Rate: 1%

% TTM (Trailing Twelve Months) covered by NW @ 4%: 22%
% TSM (Trailing Six Months) covered by NW @ 4%: 24%

Life update

Between house projects, my wife's health expenses, and work, I am currently stretched thin. We currently have two active projects at work, which has resulted in working 50+ hour weeks for most of January. With a forty-hour-a-week job, you can still have time for your projects and hobbies (especially with downtime), but a lot of stuff goes out the window when you are tied to your desk until 7 PM most nights. This has really put into perspective the ERE principles since this job in its current form would not be sustainable for me in the long term. It should let up by the end of February. The savings rate reflects all the costs going out for the house and health expenses. Most of it should be front-loaded, though, and should normalize after Q1. It is just that Q1 will be very expensive.

One of the other things I noticed is that as the financial pressure has mounted, checking my accounts has added extra stress. In the future, I will only check my accounts twice a week and when I need to update the monthly finances. I am creating a balance here where none of my actions are counterintuitive to my overarching goals. Even though the savings rate is low, we can still handle significant expenses like this with no problem. We have the money set aside in various accounts to handle this, and it is not that big of a deal and part of life. It is just that the discipline that got me to this stage also makes it hard to see such a low savings rate. Sometimes, it is a double-edged sword, and I am working on ways to work with this.

House update

We decided to start the rather large project of finishing our attic this month. Given its size, it would be two additional spaces for an office and another room (guest room/hang-out room). We initially got quoted by a contractor for the whole project, but he was nice enough to break the project out piece by piece. This gave us confidence that we could do roughly half of it ourselves. This month, our FIL came over two weekends to work on the framing and subfloors. The work hit a snag on the second session when we realized that we couldn't finish the subfloor since the wiring for the electrical work would have to be done first. So now we are at a standstill, waiting for the electrician to finish before we can finish our piece. Even though half of it is DIY, the project will still be expensive. I told my wife that this is probably the last project for this year unless there is an emergency. We have been working nonstop on the house since we moved, and I think I like the idea of fixing stuff and being handy more than the application itself. I like the money it saves, but with an intense job right now, it just eats up the time on the weekend I need to decompress and do other things that don't feel like an obligation.

Inner Work

I have been reading a book by Pete Walker called "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving." I partially read half of another book of his as well as several articles. This is his gold standard book, and he is one of the most renowned experts in this particular area. The book is very dense and hard to read, as it can be triggering for anyone who has experienced what it covers. I have been working with a therapist over the past year and a half to work through family dynamics, anxiety as well as OCD. With her, I also used the modality of EMDR and have made good progress. The reason I bring up this book, though, is that my OCD has been pretty much stagnant over this period. It really hasn't gotten better or worse, but this book helped me understand something, and since reading and implementing the practice, I have had a breakthrough and reduced my OCD symptoms by 60-80%.

The OCD has shown up primarily in my repetition-based tactics. This means I would have a counting routine after using the bathroom with my towel and the lights, a routine after scooping the litter, and a bedtime routine. Now I do not do the counting or repetion anymore and it was through his work on OCD/ADD putting you into a flight routine that made something click for me. A flight routine is something that you use to disengage as well as try to bring order into your life. The simple trick was having a mental image of my parents criticizing me for doing some of those repetitions. As soon as I imagined them doing it, I fought against it by not doing the counting to counter against them. That was pretty much the trick and has had a lasting effect since I implemented it about three weeks ago.

This is to say that the book is really worth reading if you have experienced any of these childhood traumas and want to start the healing process. I have no idea what percentage of the population has, but I imagine that it is pretty high.

Books read

Wild Mind- great book, and I think there would be a lot of value in doing the exercises, except that I felt that it was a lot when working through the exercises in the Pete Walker book as well as just generally trying to maintain other habits (meditation and gratitude)

Surviving without a Salary- fantastic book and I think out of everything I read it had the most in common with ERE in terms of attitude and approach. I'd say that YMOL and ERE are my three favorite books in this space

See, Hear, Feel- Rereading this book to get back into the practice of mediation again. See, Hear, Feel is Shinzen's version of noting meditation I have had a lot of success with

Monk's Guide to a Clean House and Mind- This quick little book talks about the practice of cleaning and how it aligns with the philosophy of mindfulness, simplicity, and the present moment

Goals and Habits

The gratitude practice has been a great little habit to keep going, especially since work has been rough recently; it's a fantastic reframing. With this, I have also started to reapply some of the tiny habits that I want to start up and keep going. If you haven't, the book is awesome and my favorite way of getting a nice routine going. It is also crucial to have tiny habits so that when your day gets turned upside down, you have some little wins that have been built.

My goals for next month are to continue the gratitude practice, continue the low buy, start Qigong again for stress, and keep the gratitude practice going. Thanks for reading!

Post Reply