Best of the ERE Forum!

[AxelHeyst]

Jacob and 7 on why ERE is resilient against being strung from the lampposts *and* being picked over by the wolves.

[AxelHeyst]

The entire thread on End of Life Care. It is full of perspectives that, really, everyone should spend some time with.

I also liked this in particular;

Jacob on how ERE doesn't require more effort than consumer or FIRE lifestyle, just different and more informed. And how that relates to old age care as an EREr.

Those with higher spending levels (WL4-5) often mistakenly think that lower spending levels require a lot of effort. Why he must be spending 8 hours a day making laundry detergent or cooking lentils. IOW, the belief is that ERE is but replacing one's day job with a lower paying one. What's important to understand is that ERE-living does not require more effort than consumer or FIRE-living but rather a different and more informed effort.

...

In conclusion, I see life as something that winds up and then winds down and where the work required is minimal and the struggle is practically non-existent IF AND ONLY IF a good [lifetime] philosophy is adapted early and followed through with consistently. I think the full version of ERE does that.

[jacob]

Another thread attempting to explain the various types of freedom-from, especially in the context of ERE City and ERE2:
viewtopic.php?t=13092

[AxelHeyst]

A concise masterclass by mF on his arrangement of freedom-to activities that happen to generate incidental income in excess of self-funding level.

I no longer need to work for money, but money can come to me as a side effect of how I want to be spending my time. Darmera and Montology are two lifestyle businesses that I aim to fully express myself through. I do not need a penny from either of them, but they fulfill complementary roles personally and across many forms of capital.

[AxelHeyst]

7's visualization of multiplayer WoGs as having relational forms (convexity/concavity) blew my mind this morning:

...
Okay, here is the visualization I am now imagining (subject to much future revision.) Each human has their own WOG towards self-actualization. These WOGS may be imagined as formed on half-spheres. A "goal" is inherent of masculine energy, so if you are a human who core, most often, prefers to be in your masculine energy in sexual relationship, then you should approach the other human, assumed to prefer feminine energy in sexual context, with your WOG convex side to her WOG concave side which will be where her underlying preferences/emotions infuse her "being." And, obviously, if you can comprehend this visualization, then you also should possess the ability to undertake this with only spending money to the extent that it is in alignment with your own value structure.

[ertyu]

Jennypenny's explanation of how to raise children who launch successfully:

All three of mine are launched now. We gave them each the same amount of money for higher ed to use/stretch as they could. I can see how that might not work with some offspring but mine were raised in the Church of ERE. That said, I don't think 'knowing the value of a dollar' was the key to their launching. Knowing that money is simply a resource, and a limited one at that (like time), helped them to decouple their planning and goal-setting from their educational kitty. It's served them well as adults too.

Getting them to launch didn't require giving them money however. Looking back, and watching what skills they rely upon now, I can see some (mostly accidental) lessons that have served them well ...

• We taught them to be curious and encouraged them to follow their curiosity. If a kid has no curiosity, it must be really hard for them to figure out what they want study or do for work. We indulged their interests to teach them how one interest (or skill) might lead to another. It's harder than it sounds (like letting dd go to china for a few months at 18 or letting ds use power tools to build things like trebuchets) but it's better than a disconnected teen with no interest in the world.
• Related, we let them grow up early. We didn't baby them until college and then start trying to teach them how to take care of themselves. By high school they were responsible for their own laundry, some family meals, cleaning their own spaces, budgeting for their own activities, and doing some of the grocery shopping. By 18, they weren't too afraid or lazy to live on their own.
• OTOH, we never told them they had to leave. They were helpful, functioning adults by 18 so why would I kick them out? Two left anyway ... one lived in China until covid and now lives with her fiancé, and the other just moved to Nashville after grad school. The third lives here but only because he works 10 minutes from the house. I think by not making college and career talk such a big 'thing' and flattening out the transition, nerves/emotions never got in the way of what they wanted to do.

I think it's silly that we all live in one or two person households anyway ... wastes money and environmental resources. Plus, I can't kick my kids out after HS and then in my 70s say 'I need help, please come back.' A blended house with an open door policy helps everyone out if done right. I see no reason to run kids off the minute they turn 18.


eta: A recent discussion I had with someone illustrated my point about letting them grow up early and flattening the transition ... His kids are preteens. I told him he should start letting his kids start the car, warm it up, work the controls, do the maintenance, etc. He asked why so early. I said because if the first time a kid sits in the drivers seat is the day of their first driving lesson, there's too much to learn and it's too hard to feel comfortable. Ease them into it and make them feel like drivers before they ever have to drive.

[mathiverse]

Sclass lays out his experienced perspective on repairing things.

ETA - while lying here in bed I got philosophical about fixes taking “way too much time.” I think the big dividend in a lot of these things is just getting more knowledge. It may pay back in the future. We like to say here the more you know the less you pay. It’s like a deposit that may throw off income at some future date. An old tech in my grad department used to tell me “when you get to my age if you just keep your eyes and ears open you’ll learn a lot of stuff.” This old guy could make or fix almost anything - like custom blown glass fixtures, silver soldered bicycle/motorcycle frames to microprocessor circuitry. All with a high school education. He just kept learning and by the time he worked “in retirement” as a university lab tech he was a technical maestro.

One reason I have a bunch of old Mercedes diesels is I took the time to learn how to fix my first one. Once I realized they were infinitely repairable I just bought more and used the knowledge to efficiently repair and maintain them. The first one was very expensive in time. The following ones are near free cars. I know where to find the parts in the junkyard and I know all the failure modes already. I basically draw dividends on the sweat equity I put into the first one.

I think a lot of things can pay out well in this way. Knowing how to repair PCs or phones. Knowing how to do home repairs. Sewing. It takes a little investment of time up front but the savings can be substantial. You can divert the capital away from repairmen and towards investments or trips to the taco truck.

[jacob]

Jupiter provides a metaphor on how to find your [life's] calling:

Maybe a bit of a tangent, but I recently played a video game called Chants of Sennaar. It is loosely based on the Tower of Babel myth. You play as a person trying to reach the top of the tower. Even if the game mechanics can be a bit clumsy at times, I found it had a really interesting underlying message, that could help in figuring out "how to choose your life's calling".

[Spoilers ahead.]

In the game, there are 5 levels, each representing a higher floor of the tower.

The first level is the abbey, where the people are deeply religious and want to climb up the tower to get closer to god. However, they cannot go past the abbey as intimidating guards won't let them pass.

The second level is the fortress, where the people are part of a military faction that sworn to protect the divine ones (the artists) by preventing the impure ones (the non-artists) from going up.

The third floor is filled with artists, who spend their days attending theatre plays and listening to music concerts while being served food and refreshments by servants. The artists are full of themselves and believe only fools will attempt to go up the tower, as a monster inhabits the tunnels leading to the next level.

The fourth floor is the scientific district, where alchemists, eating at the cafeteria, processing minerals from mines, studying at the library or experimenting at the laboratory, are on a dire quest to discover the transmutation formulae.

The last level, where technology as long been integrated into daily lives, shows individuals who aren't working together towards achieving an ideal, but rather are entertained on their personal VR screens, all seated separately.

The interesting part resides in the fact that no matter what they are explicitly seeking (god/the divine, loyalty, discipline & service, beauty, emotion and drama, an understanding of the universe, a distraction because everyone is bored out of their minds), they all implicitly want & need the same thing: connection. Connection with the universe, with something greater, with their own selves, with their traditions and culture... and with each other. They just use different means and value different things to feel a sense of connection.

Hence, the main game mechanics gravitate around how to communicate with people. It rewards seeking to understand everyone, and ultimately allowing people from different tribes to create connections with each other.

[End of danger zone.]

I think that if we keep in mind that a very human goal in life is to create deep, meaningful connections & relationships (through/with people, spirituality, an art practice, a movement practice, a quest to learn, a quest to become a better person, nurturing a family, etc.), then maybe that choosing your calling is all about recognizing what makes you feel engaged and connected with (one or many parts of) the world.

I like that there is no notion of talent/skill in this paradigm. We can even get rid of the categories that they made for the sake of having a discrete number of levels in the game. Your calling could be a set of activities/situations where you feel engaged, simulated, playful, focused, curious, valued and understood. It is where, with what, and with who you feel a great sense of connection.