Are you an "adult"?

[7Wannabe5]

@ the modernchap:

Good on you. I think it probably would have been more disturbing for your mother. I also agree that this is the sort of experience that defines a certain aspect of adulthood. For instance, there is an episode of MASH in which Hawkeye is in charge and trying to keep a bus full of people quiet in order to evade being noticed by the enemy, and this results in a woman accidentally smothering her infant to death by trying to keep him hushed. So Hawkeye has a complete nervous-breakdown due to feeling guilt for making a mistake that resulted in injury to others as a result of his leadership role.

IOW, I don't think peak adulthood can be achieved simply by taking on greater and greater responsibility for self or future self. It has to involve some degree of taking on authority and responsibility for others.

Another weak theory I have developed is that the INTJ take on adulthood might be somewhat "off" due to the fact that the INTJ probably has the most "adult-like" inner child. It's more difficult to be self-aware about whether you are in adult-mode vs. child-mode if your inner-child is a serious-minded 10 year old vs., for instance, the experience of an ENTP type whose inner child is more like a bouncy 3 year old. I mean, on some level, the perspective that informs you "I am the adult in the room and everybody else is an idiot child." is more the perspective of a 10 year old left in charge of younger siblings than it is the perspective of an adult in adult-mode.

[themodernchap]

I don't think that's a bad theory at all. I've always felt "older" than my age while growing up, usually had older friends and so on.

I also agree with your idea about having to take responsibility for others, the deal my partner and I have is that she's largely responsible for the near term, keeping me on task and organising our lives in the near future. I'm responsible for the long term, so investments, pensions, mortgage and the direction of our business etc.