new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Intended for constructive conversations. Exhibits of polarizing tribalism will be deleted.
Seppia
Posts: 1420
Joined: Tue Aug 30, 2016 9:34 am
Location: Italy

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Seppia »

Jean wrote:
Fri Feb 08, 2019 1:48 pm
They wouldn't have to support me, only pay insurances and some food for the kids.
Wait so your angle here is “you get to share me with other women but I’m not afraid to be a dad and you only have to pay insurance and chip in some money for the privilege”?

I’m not really bullish on your enterprise, but I wish you all the luck in the world.
:)

Mister Imperceptible
Posts: 1298
Joined: Fri Nov 10, 2017 4:18 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Mister Imperceptible »

“From his point of view, "this is not a failure or success - it is a fact, and [gives us] new information that we did not have before this experiment".”
Jason wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 8:16 am
produce a plethora of evidence that either confirms or falsifies their findings
Go Genghis Jean Go!

jacob
Site Admin
Posts: 12429
Joined: Fri Jun 28, 2013 8:38 pm
Location: USA, Zone 5b, Koppen Dfa, Elev. 620ft, Walkscore 73
Contact:

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by jacob »

There seem to be easier and more effective approaches in existence. Lets draw a Venn diagram.

1) Become a teacher. Teaching propagates culture and memes. An inspirational elementary school teacher with a life long career influences and determines many more children than the 1-2 or 8 that one can influence as a parent. It is also possible to "raise adults". That's what my focus is ... although sometimes it feels more like I'm running an adult daycare center :?

2) Become a sperm (or egg) donor. This propagates your DNA much further than you can do "manually". It also comes with plenty of medical screens to ensure that your DNA is actually worth propagating.

3) Become a foster parent. If you do a good job, you can have family relations with more children than would otherwise be practical. You might even establish your own clan. Think https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gracie_family

In the intersection between all three is the traditional nuclear family. Nuclear influence is small in quantity, but it is higher in complexity because it involves all three. I think proper strategy should reflect one's talents. I don't think my DNA is particularly good and I don't enjoy parenting random children, so I seek to contribute to the world via (1).

JamesR
Posts: 919
Joined: Sun Apr 21, 2013 9:08 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by JamesR »

jacob wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 9:32 am
2) Become a sperm (or egg) donor. This propagates your DNA much further than you can do "manually". It also comes with plenty of medical screens to ensure that your DNA is actually worth propagating.
This step doesn't seem particularly easy, there's usually screening, and selection (even if you're free of genetic diseases). There's no guarantee you can disseminate your DNA maximally, or at all. You'd almost have to become a fertility doctor and pull a https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cecil_Jacobson but that's not very nice. Other option is to be enormously attractive w/ the most highly sought after traits in terms of height, hair/eye color, etc or be famous in some manner (i.e. Einstein) in order to have highly sought after DNA in the fertility market.

Jason
Posts: 2765
Joined: Mon Jan 30, 2017 8:37 am

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Jason »

Seppia wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 8:33 am
Wait so your angle here is “you get to share me with other women but I’m not afraid to be a dad and you only have to pay insurance and chip in some money for the privilege”?

I’m not really bullish on your enterprise, but I wish you all the luck in the world.
:)
When you put it that way, isn't it just the Uber model extended to procreation? You don't even have to change the driver or rider categories.

suomalainen
Posts: 725
Joined: Sat Oct 18, 2014 12:49 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by suomalainen »

jacob wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 9:32 am
although sometimes it feels more like I'm running an adult daycare center :?
Wait. You work in the white house now?

7Wannabe5
Posts: 6117
Joined: Fri Oct 18, 2013 9:03 am
Location: Clinton River Watershed

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

@jacob:

Other options might be breeding dahlias, training police dogs, running a small business in which you have a partner and employees, or making a career as a wet-nurse :lol:

That's why I say that most modern adults are polyamourous by mid-life, even if not fully sexualized. For instance, returning to my sitcom example, in Seinfeld, Jerry is obviously the "parent" of his group of friends, because they are most frequently clustered near his kitchen. In exchange for providing higher proportion of resources, he is able to exert higher level of control over operations (or vice-versa.) His front door which he locks and unlocks as he admits his friends into his domicile represents the masculine energy inherent in parenting (territorial imperative, exhibiting care through exclusion)and the food in his kitchen represents the feminine energy inherent in parenting (placenta, breasts, hearth, exhibiting care through inclusion.)

So, in a situation involving open contract between adults, who are at a level of maturity and experience to recognize sexual infatuation or romantic limerence for what it is, problems with "sharing" are not very difficult to resolve, because Elaine does not own Jerry or the crackers on Jerry's counter any more than George owns Jerry or the crackers on Jerry's counter, and they both possess either ownership or access to other realms in which they may fill any variety of leader, partner, peer, or follower role.

OTOH, since my father was my primary parent, and I had 3 sisters, I am chuckling at the notion of Jean dealing with 8 teenage daughters all trying to get ready to go out on Friday night given his current bathroom accommodations. In some polygynous cultures with relatively easy divorce provisions in which men are routinely granted custody and females are granted adult status at age 13, the girls often choose to go live with their mothers at that age. In those cultures, men also can't financially divorce a woman and take custody until child is weaned. So, that is something Jean might want to take into account given that reductionist/reconstructionist nutritional science has not yet devised true replacement for complexity of breast-milk or the associated experience towards human development.

Jean
Posts: 1191
Joined: Fri Dec 13, 2013 8:49 am
Location: Switzterland

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Jean »

Getting ready for friday night, will probably include a three hour walk. So they'de better use the lake down by the city instead of my bathroom (which will include a shower and a wood heated hot tube, by the way).

sky
Posts: 1072
Joined: Tue Jan 04, 2011 2:20 am
Contact:

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by sky »

I'd be afraid of getting shot by an angry, conservative father of one of the brides.

7Wannabe5
Posts: 6117
Joined: Fri Oct 18, 2013 9:03 am
Location: Clinton River Watershed

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

@Jean:That might work. We lived on a small private lake when my sisters and I were teenagers, and we frequently had to carry our bicycles and clothing while wading along the lake to the other shore in order to access the rural highway that led to the roller rink, the ice cream store, and the public party lake, often colloquially referred to as "bare ass beach." Of course, given your very attractive genes, if you do end up with 8 teenage daughters, you might have more trouble with keeping any or all of the neighboring youth off of your turf.

@sky: Right, and Jean is also maybe forgetting about the possibility of acquiring 8 mothers-in-law.

The Old Man
Posts: 439
Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 5:55 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by The Old Man »

https://www.gov.uk/legal-rights-for-egg ... erm-donors
https://family-law.freeadvice.com/famil ... gation.htm
https://www.theguardian.com/money/2012/ ... aintenance
Depending on the facts and circumstances a Sperm Donor may still have responsibilities beyond the donation itself.

EdithKeeler
Posts: 1059
Joined: Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:55 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by EdithKeeler »

Reading through this entire thread, I have no idea why a woman would sign on to this. There seems to be absolutely no upside for the woman. Or the children, for that matter.

I also disagree with the premise that “many men don’t want to be fathers.” That’s not my experience at all.

This looks like a better deal if you want to make lots of babies: https://www.coparents.com/searchmatch.p ... country=US

https://abcnews.go.com/blogs/health/201 ... ine-sperm/

7Wannabe5
Posts: 6117
Joined: Fri Oct 18, 2013 9:03 am
Location: Clinton River Watershed

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

EdithKeeler wrote:I also disagree with the premise that “many men don’t want to be fathers.” That’s not my experience at all.
I agree. However, "relatively few men on this forum want to be fathers" might be true. This could be due to above average possession of tendency towards maintenance of territorial imperative over larger than average resource base. This tendency does correlate well with intelligence across species, but as with all things, too high of a level within individual (as opposed to population) might actually reduce ability to produce and raise viable offspring.

I mean if you took rationality towards self-preservation to the nth degree, and projected forward two generations, and threw in more than a modicum of risk-aversion, highly unlikely that an individual would ever even choose to have sex at all. Generally, it takes a female exuding almost super-human level of the attractive dense energy qualities associated with chaotic hot mess to overcome this tendency. The usual hand-him-a-drink-and-crawl-up-on-his-lap-and-loosen-his-tie protocol will likely not prove adequate. Only long-term solution I can come up with requires possibility of cloning Shakira.
Last edited by 7Wannabe5 on Sun Feb 10, 2019 9:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

EdithKeeler
Posts: 1059
Joined: Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:55 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by EdithKeeler »

I was just thinking about the men in my circle who are /were stay home dads. One is my stepbrother—he married a woman who eventually became a Navy admiral. His staying home allowed her to have a great career and finance the family. Three kids. My college roomie is a DC lawyer. Her husband stayed home and raised their three kids, allowing her to do her thing. Another guy married a surgeon and he stayed home with their 4 kids. One is married to a woman I used to know—they had twins, he stayed home the first few years, and I remember that by the time they were 8 the kids were fluent in both Japanese and English and played about 4 musical instruments.

That sort of arrangement seems to offer a lot more than your scenario. A woman who is a good earner and not crazy is most likely not going to want to share either the man or other resources with other women or their children, imho.

Jean
Posts: 1191
Joined: Fri Dec 13, 2013 8:49 am
Location: Switzterland

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Jean »

Thank you for you input. This discussion is a lot of fun and very instructive.

Jason
Posts: 2765
Joined: Mon Jan 30, 2017 8:37 am

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Jason »

I hope your dissemination is as fruitful as that found on this thread.

Mister Imperceptible
Posts: 1298
Joined: Fri Nov 10, 2017 4:18 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Mister Imperceptible »

EdithKeeler wrote:
Sun Feb 10, 2019 9:36 am
a woman who eventually became a Navy admiral
....
Another guy married a surgeon and he stayed home with their 4 kids
Were these women physically attractive? Were the men physically attractive and seen as good sources of DNA?

I crave the power woman. Unlike Genghis Jean I am a K-strategist. I recently received massage therapy from a woman I would intensely desire to procreate with. Unfortunately she brought her boyfriend to the in-home session as a chaperone, and not knowing what my positive attributes were, most women would select him over me 10 out of 10 times. :cry:

Jason
Posts: 2765
Joined: Mon Jan 30, 2017 8:37 am

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Jason »

Tip her with gold. I bet she changes her mind.

Mister Imperceptible
Posts: 1298
Joined: Fri Nov 10, 2017 4:18 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by Mister Imperceptible »

I used to dress fancy and expensively. All it did was attract the wrong women. As it turns out, you cannot pick up a woman in a Lamborghini and drive her to McDonald’s. (I didn’t do that but that’s a tidy summarization.)

Wealth signaling leads to spoiled expectations. I read that in China, men are forced to buy third and fourth homes to signal wealth because the one child policy and the desire for male children has led to intense overcompetition. So, the ghost cities in China are partly attributable to bad monetary policy, and partly attributable to the collective inability of men to tell women that their HGTV obsessions are moronic.

“Ooooooooo, SHINY THINGS!!!!!”

Population overshoot, and mass death, here we come!

EdithKeeler
Posts: 1059
Joined: Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:55 pm

Re: new mating strategy gaming hypergamy

Post by EdithKeeler »

Were these women physically attractive? Were the men physically attractive and seen as good sources of DNA?
I suppose it depends on your perspective. Yeah, I’d say those women were maybe 7-8 or so in appearance. My stepbrother was exceptionally good Looking back in the day, and a nice guy.... but not the sharpest knife in the drawer. His Navy wife has three or 4 PhDs in math and related fields, so I can only assume he also has a large penis and lots of energy. (interestingly, their kids turned out neither attractive nor smart and one apparently is pretty heavily into drugs and had a baby young....). The guy married to the surgeon is short and hairy—not my type at all—but it works. Their kids turned out well.

My lawyer friend is average smart and was average attractive back in the day. Her husband was unattractive (it would be rude to call him fugly...)then and pretty much unemployed and unemployable. Not someone I’d want to join genetic material with. He was/is however a great dad, and their kids turned out great (not pretty, though....). All three kids got academic scholarships to different engineering schools and one graduated with a dual degree in 3 years.

You never can predict, I think, how things will work out, despite the best planning.

Post Reply