ERE we go then

[UK-with-kids]

Hello everybody

I decided to call myself "UK-with-kids" as that covers off two of the biggest factors which will affect my journey to FI/(E)RE.

I was on consumer sucker cruise control when I discovered MMM and then ERE in 2012. I'd just been laid off from work around the time my DD no.1 was born, and we were also right in the middle of some expensive home improvements. Cue a mini mid-life crisis which you could say has been dragging on ever since. Fortunately it's been more about deciding what I want to spend the rest of my life doing rather than the kind where you go out and make the situation even worse by buying a sports car on credit!

I've been toying with the idea of starting a blog for ages, but instead I thought I'd join this forum as I've been lurking for a while and I like the quality of discussion and thoughtfulness of the contributors. This way I can jot down my thoughts and probably start my own journal page, but without the pressure of a regular posting schedule or the need to optimise my writing or generate traffic.

I come out as INTJ every time I do the online tests, with introversion as my strongest score. I'm male but in a household with three females - my SO and 2x DDs.

Looking forward to getting to know some people on here and being part of the community. In the real world I only know one person who is pursuing FI, and nobody with an interest in ERE or simple living specifically.

TIA,
UWK

[BRUTE]

hi

[wolf]

Welcome UWK!

[prognastat]

Welcome to the forums. Hope there'll be plenty more good discussion to be had.

[UK-with-kids]

hi

Hi BRUTE. I read BRUTE's journal. It got me thinking about the difference between distractions (like cat videos and dogs) and finding meaning (like having kids or establishing a colony on Mars). If there is a difference that is; maybe it's a continuum. I also liked hearing about BRUTE's diet as I don't get on with carbs very well either.

[UK-with-kids]

Welcome UWK!

Thanks, wolf. I just read through your journal (the newer one). Your low level of expenses is very impressive, and your lifestyle sounds great. I also like the subject lines of some of the other discussions you have started, although I haven't read any of them yet.

[SavingWithBabies]

Welcome! I'm also going down this path with two kids (two young boys) and my wife. Getting laid off a while back pushed me to start a side business and get serious about FI/ERE. Looking forward to following your journey.

[UK-with-kids]

Welcome to the forums. Hope there'll be plenty more good discussion to be had.

Thanks, prognastat. Hope your divorce goes ok, sounds like you are seeing it as an opportunity to improve your life. I bet all that exercise and losing weight is making you feel good about yourself.

[prognastat]

Thanks, yeah definitely hoping to use it as a jumping off point. It's not great in the moment, but the best I can do is make sure it helps improve things down the line.

As for the health portion of it, I feel so much better. Despite working out constantly I have more energy than ever. I'd say I have more energy now than I did 8 years ago.

[UK-with-kids]

Welcome! I'm also going down this path with two kids (two young boys) and my wife. Getting laid off a while back pushed me to start a side business and get serious about FI/ERE. Looking forward to following your journey.

Thanks SWB. We have a side business as well, which I'll get round to writing about at some point. It's definitely the way to go once your earn-per-hour capability is maxxing out.

Well done for losing so much weight, very impressive. I'm not sure how much you can do without hurting your back, but if you do a type of exercise that builds muscle (e.g weights rather than cycling) then your body will require more calories even when resting, which might help with the plateau you're reaching as a result of eating the same calories at a lower weight.

[UK-with-kids]

We've been away on a week's holiday twice recently. Something about a change of scenery and reduced stress makes me feel like a different person. It improves everything in my relationship with my partner and our children. It broadens our horizons and we have all kinds of discussions about new possibilities. When we get back we even start taking action on some of them. But then within a few days the old stresses seem to creep back in again. I'd like to somehow capture more of that positive mindset all the time and not have to go away and stop working to achieve it. I'm not sure how possible that is.

TLDR journal & personal profile re-cap:
- Consumer sucker up to 2012 although always naturally frugal(ish)
- Mid expensive home renovations and got laid off
- Discovered MMM & ERE in 2012
- Male with female partner and 2 x DDs
- INTJ and very introvert
- Don't do well eating too many carbs
- Got a side business (not written about it here yet)

[AxelHeyst]

Are you familiar with a system like GTD (Getting Things Done)? I found it quite helpful in terms of being an infrastructure for organizing all your hopes and dreams (as well as have-to-do's) in such a way to keep stress and overwhelm down. One of the key concepts of GTD is that, unlike going to a weekend "reclaim your life!!" seminar that gets you all jazzed, and then you go back to work on Monday and lose the dreams because you're putting out fires all the time, rather, GTD starts at "the bottom" to get your daily life more sorted, flowing better, less stress, so that from that position of relaxed control you can start to move more intentionally towards your goals / things you're excited about.

Interested in your experiences wrt carbs and eating frugally, as I'm similar.

[UK-with-kids]

Are you familiar with a system like GTD (Getting Things Done)? I found it quite helpful in terms of being an infrastructure for organizing all your hopes and dreams (as well as have-to-do's) in such a way to keep stress and overwhelm down. One of the key concepts of GTD is that, unlike going to a weekend "reclaim your life!!" seminar that gets you all jazzed, and then you go back to work on Monday and lose the dreams because you're putting out fires all the time, rather, GTD starts at "the bottom" to get your daily life more sorted, flowing better, less stress, so that from that position of relaxed control you can start to move more intentionally towards your goals / things you're excited about.

Are you referring to the book "Getting Things Done" by David Allen? It's staring at me from the bookshelf right now, reminding me about yet another unsuccessful attempt I made to try and get control of things! Actually, my favourite is Mark Forster who wrote "Get Everything Done (and still have time to play)", and "Do it Tomorrow". In one of his books there is a hilarious set of stories about a prince who tried to woo a princess but his personal organisation kept letting him down. Every wizard (=guru) he tried to follow eventually let him down one way or another (prioritise, do it now, swallow the frog, go with the flow, etc).

[UK-with-kids]

Interested in your experiences wrt carbs and eating frugally, as I'm similar.

In the old days I used to eat things like toast and jam for breakfast and drink orange juice. Then sandwiches for lunch, but continuous snacking all day really. The warrior diet, or so I thought. But I would get terrible sugar lows. Like if I had to bike somewhere in the afternoon and I'd have to stop and would literally be shaking and needing immediate food/sugar. I totally couldn't work out what the problem was.

Then I read about Paleo and realised that all that snacking wasn't real hunger, it was in response to sugar crashes caused by an insulin spike dropping back. I was basically eating my way to type 2 diabetes in later life, and I only realised that once I changed my diet to low-carb and happened to mention it to an older colleague who was already diabetic and had to eat exactly the same thing as me for medical reasons.

It obviously makes perfect sense as we haven't really evolved much since we stopped being hunter gatherers about 10,000 years ago, and high energy carbs are basically a way of enabling large populations to live in settlements without having to find food from the natural environment over a large range of land. There weren't really high carb foods in the natural environment, and as for foods like chocolate with sugar+fat together - absolutely not!

I'm afraid I don't have much advice on eating a high protein diet frugally. Clearly it takes a lot more energy and water to produce 1g of meat than 1g of potatoes or pasta. Which is a problem now there are far too many humans in the world. Unless you're going to eat insects or something. And avocados certainly aren't cheap where I live, so even getting the same calories from 'good fat' isn't low price.

[CS]

Beans and lentils are high in protein. I only eat lentil pasta... well, actually I have some amazingly delicious corn pasta but that kills my blood sugar so only as a small amount with something high protein lol. Normally it's lentil, or lentil and quinoa pasta for a little extra carbs.

But the lentil pasta with a nice oil or pesto or butter is great for getting some carbs without killing the your sugars.

[UK-with-kids]

Beans and lentils are high in protein. I only eat lentil pasta... well, actually I have some amazingly delicious corn pasta but that kills my blood sugar so only as a small amount with something high protein lol. Normally it's lentil, or lentil and quinoa pasta for a little extra carbs.

But the lentil pasta with a nice oil or pesto or butter is great for getting some carbs without killing the your sugars.

IIRC beans are not a 'complete protein' that contain all 9 essential amino acids, but if you accompany them with rice you do get what you need from the whole meal. I don't get on too badly with rice, but too many beans doesn't really agree with me. I quite enjoy something like a dal with grated cheese for some extra protein. I'm a very long way from ever coping as a vegetarian though, let alone a vegan.