Five Years, Lord Willing

Where are you and where are you going?
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Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

I think my feeling sorry for myself/depression has passed. It might have been that documentary on Princess Di. She was only 36 when she Di'd. Beautiful woman, smart, did amazing things for AIDS awareness but always made sure she had her royal dildo packed for her humanitarian journeys. Truly a world class piece of ass and you know she was fierce in the sack. Unfortunately she marries a guy who only wants to fuck chicks that remind him of his own mother. As our great leader so eloquently summarizes complex issues, "sad."

I have a very rudimentary understanding of the mathematical relationship to retirement and since I'm way passed ERE and just trying to save as much coin as possible, I tried to figure out how much money I need to save to have my house paid off and have 1 Mil in the bank. With the help of blowhard Dave Ramsey and his handy dandy savings calculator it appears to be approx. 300K. Its a big number but not a crazy ass you got to be fucking kidding me number. A back of the napkin scratch is that our net worth went up about 130K in the last year. Five years will not be five years. I have resolved myself to that based upon certain factors, most notably my self and my propensity to fuck myself in my own ass on a fairly regular basis. But its a place to start.

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fiby41
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by fiby41 »

Jason wrote:
Wed Aug 16, 2017 7:17 am
Unfortunately she marries a guy who only wants to fuck chicks that remind him of his own mother.
As the saying goes every man grows up to marry his own mother. Oedipus complex much? Perhaps Freud has written volumes expounding on this, but Dragline is the only one I'm aware of, who has read him.

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

I took a class in college "Freud and Modernism." I think I read most of his stuff. I think Oedipus was in "Totem and Taboo" which sounds like goods names for a set of twins. Freud in psychology, Marx in history, Nietzsche in philosophy, Darwin in science. They are responsible for why we have arrived where we are. However, from my understanding,in the psychology community, Freud is no longer taken serious (or at least held in reverence as he once was), having initially been eclipsed by Jung. But that's where my knowledge on the matter ends.

But back to Charles. He marries this beautiful woman, half his age, a nymphomaniac (my viewpoint but one with which I will not trifle) who by all accounts loves him and he wants to bang this middle aged woman that looks like she should be solving garden party murders on some insipid daytime BBC show geared for old women drooling in wheelchairs.

To think this guy could be King should frighten everyone. And I don't care what the party line is, no way is that ginger spare his biological son. He looks like he just wants to go to soccer games, get drunk and beat the shit out of Muslims.

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

Good News: My wife is back from Venice. I bought her a dozen roses so when she came in she would see that I missed her. I remember reading a story of someone visiting James Agee when he was living alone. They said it looked like he had been wrestling with the devil. That's how I felt except I didn't write Let Us Praise Famous Men while she was gone. But I did watch all the golden button America Got Talent auditions. Man some people are fuckin talented. But Simon Cowell has changed. He's nice and smiles. He must be getting blown on a regular basis or something.

Bad News: Stock market and Zillow are like two hillbillies treating me like I'm Ned Beatty. For the first time in my life I have thought about retiring overseas. Someone here posted pictures of Switzerland. That was beautiful. The Alps. Plus chocolate. And beautiful, icy, remote Aryan chicks wearing black leather pants. I'm just not sure about the whole neutrality thing. People are not neutral. They can be objective on occasion. There was this woman I worked with fresh out of college. I didn't really like her but she banged the office stud and then like a douche he tells everyone that she sings "The Sound Of Music" when she orgasms. I actually felt bad for her. But it did help me see the real meaning in Julie Andrews singing in the mountains. I never realized it was one of the greatest euphemisms in 20th century cinema. I mean let's face it, she dancing around out there like a singing vagina. I see death everywhere.

Irrelevant News: I'm having a hard time focusing on reading. It might be the summer, who knows.

Frugalchicos
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Frugalchicos »

Good job Jason, you made me laugh!

Keep up with the savings and if you ever want to retire overseas, Spain welcomes you!

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

Thank you Frugalchicos. Maybe I will follow you to the Basque country. I could work in your restaurant, serving your delicious Pinxtos to all the wonderful people of Spain.

Despite recent events, from all accounts, Barcelona is also beautiful and clean. Plus, its a language I could learn.

Spain. I'm digging it. Well, except the bullfighting. Why in the world do people find it exciting to run through the streets being chased by a bull? I mean the risk/reward quotient is completely imbalanced. If a good result is that you are alive and weren't anally impaled by an incensed bull, I don't see why you would voluntarily engage in such an activity in the first place.

Frugalchicos
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Frugalchicos »

Sounds like a plan, as far as you are also able to be sarcastic in Spanish :lol:

I feel exactly the same about the bull fighting, there is no fucking need to kill a bull in such a way. I actually feel some short of joy when the stupid bullfighter gets a horn in between his balls...

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fiby41
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

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Jason wrote:
Sun Aug 20, 2017 11:46 am

Spain. I'm digging it. Well, except the bullfighting. Why in the world do people find it exciting to run through the streets being chased by a bull? I mean the risk/reward quotient is completely imbalanced. If a good result is that you are alive and weren't anally impaled by an incensed bull, I don't see why you would voluntarily engage in such an activity in the first place.
Frugalchicos wrote:
Sun Aug 20, 2017 2:39 pm

I feel exactly the same about the bull fighting, there is no fucking need to kill a bull in such a way. I actually feel some short of joy when the stupid bullfighter gets a horn in between his balls...
I find it marvelous that such cultural festivals carry on without government intervention.
In my country bull racing festivals have to get permission from the judiciary every year.
Another similarity between the Spanish and Hindu culture is building the human pyramids. We make human pyramids to celebrate Krishna's birth which fell on 14th August (last week) this year. Unfortunately the court dictates everything from the age of participants to number of levels/tiers of the human pyramids.

However the judiciary does not intervene in backward Muslim practices like animal sacrifices on Eid on grounds of secularism and religious freedom. Apparently racing domestic bulls during agricultural downtime to keep them healthy is cruelty to animals but slaughtering them is not.

7Wannabe5
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

You forgot the "Now." Comes after the majestic plural object pronoun. Sounds better that way.

Julie Andrews (Edwards) was also the author of one of my favorite books when I was a child. "Mandy" is the story of a little orphan girl who climbs over the orphanage wall and discovers a small abandoned cottage which she fixes up to make a home for herself. Eventually, she is rescued from her plight by the affluent man on a large black horse who owns the estate upon which her scavenged cottage is located. From adult perspective, I can see that the moral of this story, like many 19th century British novels, is that the practice of good, frugal housekeeping will get you well-laid. Unfortunately, it has been my experience that this is not exactly true.

Anyways, good observation on Switzerland. I think Switzerland is more like the kid everybody agrees should be the banker when playing Monopoly.

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

I'm sorry to hear that. Maybe watch Mary Poppins again. Her umbrella was always going up in that one.

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

Yesterday I was shooting the shit with my Muslim crew. One of them had an emergency gall bladder operation. The whole thing was removed. I asked "Don't you need that shit?" Nobody seemed to know exactly, but the fact that he was still alive albeit a little gaunt seemed to indicate that the answer was no. We got into a whole discussion how God supplies the body with unnecessary parts in order that they be used in other places. Like spare tires. Or the piece left over after you build an Ikea desk.

The point of the story? None at all.

This morning I got my ass reemed out for being negative. I am negative. I am going to try to be positive going forward. Its going to be very difficult but I am going to force myself. Its self control of the mind which I never developed.

halfmoon
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by halfmoon »

Unless it was your wife complaining about your attitude...who cares? If it was your wife, then from God's lips to your ears: straighten up and fly right.

Your brand of dark humor doesn't seem so negative to me. Actually, I'd call a married man who repeatedly mentions hookers and blow jobs unrealistically hopeful. :P

Frugalchicos
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Frugalchicos »

Good Morning Jason,

As you said, being negative is just a trained habit. Sometimes being positive means protecting yourself of being overexposed to the news channels, reading too much about how the world is doing (there is always some short of apocalyptic/the sky is falling feeling going on). Or perhaps, you just need to be a little bit more selfish and only worry about your closest significant others and friends (I bet you will do just fine with this one).

Think about the amazing goal you are accomplishing and all the good things that come with it. I recommend the book The Art of Happiness.

All the best!

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

@ Halmoon

You are right. Why should I care that some hooker calls me negative just because I suggest she's not blowing me properly.

@Frugalchicos

Your encouragement is like the ERE wind beneath my nutsack.

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

Good News: Some found money, which happens in my line of work. $8.5k to be paid over two years. I believe I will knock 20K off my mortgage this year.

Bad News: NO BAD NEWS!!! I'M NOW AN OPTIMIST! EVERYTHING IS GREAT!!! I AM AT TOTAL PEACE!!!

Other News: About 10 years ago, we almost adopted a Chinese girl. We didn't have her picked out, but let's face it, they all look the same. I made excuses for why we didn't do it but ultimately I was scared, primarily about money. Some days it saddens me. Thinking I could have had a little flat ass girl running around the place, sitting her on my knee, explaining how her government only wanted boys and if it wasn't for me she would have most likely spent her life as a sex slave or working in some dangerous factory with clothes pins keeping her little slanty eyes open. Oh well. I guess there are worse things than dying sad and all alone, although I can't think of any at the moment. Looks like I need to work harder at this optimist bullshit.

suomalainen
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by suomalainen »

(Weak) chin up, you won't die alone. You'll die before DW. Pessimists have shorter lifespans, dontchaknow?

halfmoon
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by halfmoon »

It may be little consolation, but having/adopting a child is no warranty against dying sad and alone. I'm not sure that sad and alone are even related. It's utterly possible to have people around you until the bitter end who make you sad and/or mad (see Sclass' stories), and they might well be your children. Better to cultivate those who actually like you independent of any gratitude for having spawned them or saved them from life as a sex/factory slave. Your wife comes to mind as someone to cultivate. :P

Noedig
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Noedig »

Agree with halfmoon.

Jason, we simply can't have you turning into an optimist. It would detract from the tone of your observations.

Less Zen and Pollyanna-eyed optimism. More salty metaphors involving asian ladies working in the service economy! So say I.

Also, and at further risk of collapsing some delicate flower of regret and reminiscence, I would say that mine own dear two children are utter impediments to ERE. Oh yes, quite forget about that. I am braced for further drains upon the parental exchequer in time to come.

It could have been still worse - the marginal utility of a third child, as Milton Friedman might have put it, was considered and rejected.

Perhaps time for Frank Sinatra now to hint this topic should be curtailed: "Rugrats, I have a few, but then again, two few to mention"

But warming to the underlying theme of of regret, I will share that I have myself some corking ones :
.... that I went to college to study something uninteresting, hard, and time-consuming, that I have never used
.....that my first serious relationship was with an alcoholic.
.....Joyless life denying father (not really sure I can class this as a regret, as not my work, but what the hell it's my pity party so it's here)
.....that I put up with utter bullcrap for years with another partner before putting a stop to it
.....that I have invested too much time in work. This is on the one hand a classic "No Shinola, Sherlock" perception, but there is always a limiting condition to getting what you want out of life. I thought for the longest time that it was Money (well, having no money/plenty insecurity does incline one that way), and then after encountering ERE I thought it was Time, and now I understand that actually and really truly it is Health.

Yet .... we still suck down air. Experience is waiting to be garnered and and shared, and, Yes! the future may once again yet be ours for a time, a string of brighter moments, before we inevitably fold into the embrace of the Dark. Or as you might say, of the Douchebag.

Jason

Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason »

Yeah, I guess I didn't think that through. I could spare that little Ch*nk a life of living under a rice bowl and in the end I'm suffering the ravages of alzheimers and she's forging my name on life insurance policies with all her fellow hard talking, criminally minded adopted Ch*nk friends. That's not to say there wouldn't have been some intermediate joy in all the math and science awards she racked up as a youngster.

I actually hope I die after my wife. I don't want her to be alone. But I'm starting to get the impression that she doesn't feel the same way.

That's interesting Noedig about health. I will factor that in.

I regretted how I spent my college years and I was plagued by dreams of failing tests, not handing in papers, missing entire year of class so I went back for Master's studies and did everything right. I still have those fuckin dreams.

slowtraveler
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by slowtraveler »

Did going back and "doing everything right" help?

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