Re: How Will My Fascination with ERE Affect My Marriage?
Posted: Wed Jul 04, 2018 8:21 pm
Well the silver lining is you can rename your journal. Just go to the first post, edit it and change the subject.
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Jason wrote: ↑Tue Feb 06, 2018 8:20 amMaybe you just need to put those feminine wiles to use. Like set up a date night where you cook him a home made meal made from scratch, show yourself off in a dress you made by hand, prop him up be letting him beat you in a game of chess, and then when you are relaxing in your newly decluttered living room, coyly whisper in his ear "You know what really turns me on, baby? A man who re-soles his twenty year old work boots."
@chicago81:chicago81 wrote: ↑Sat Jul 14, 2018 11:59 amJason wrote: ↑Tue Feb 06, 2018 8:20 amMaybe you just need to put those feminine wiles to use. Like set up a date night where you cook him a home made meal made from scratch, show yourself off in a dress you made by hand, prop him up be letting him beat you in a game of chess, and then when you are relaxing in your newly decluttered living room, coyly whisper in his ear "You know what really turns me on, baby? A man who re-soles his twenty year old work boots."
This paragraph is not only breathtakingly literary, but explains why Russian girls make the best strippers.Clarice wrote: ↑Sun Sep 09, 2018 2:20 pmAugust 2018
MARRIAGE
Not easy. We've always gone though periods of extreme alienation, leading parallel lives. We slip there because of this disagreement or that, and then it's weeks or months. Cold. Ice cold. I am always the one who has to make the peace. DH is not a peacemaker. He is not a maker in general. He is a reliable, disciplined follower. Every time, in order to end this ice age I have to fake it until I make it. It doesn't come from love. It comes from grit. But love follows. Right now I do feel love. It took a lot of grit to get here. That was my August.
I take no credit for originating it, but I am an evangelizer. Where it really struck a chord with me and has stuck with me since:
And sorry to hear about your August. Relationships are hard.
Ha-ha, feel flattered. I'd say more like Anna Karenina than War and Peace. Now, that I think about it, the husband of Anna Karenina is often mentioned as a textbook example of ISTJ - something he shares with DH. I can totally relate to her temptations (but not the jumping under the train part). Now back to the money. I've done a little investigation and unearthed my old retirement accounts - from working at a school district like for 5 minutes, from working at a large hospital, and the money that has been in my current 401K from since I worked for this company a long time ago. Here are my independent finances for right now:
I wish... DH never spills any drinks. He is super-neat and really well coordinated. When I spill a drink (a frequent occurrence) he is bothered by this behavior tremendously. I am trying to abide by 11 commandments with 11th being, "Thou shalt not spill" , but it doesn't work.What does grown man behaving like obedient 5 year old look like? Did he run to get a paper towel after he spilled drink twice?
That's an interesting experience that I've never had. In my case, the original family reacted with sadness along the lines of "He left us for another woman." My SIL has done her best to ignore the unpleasant fact of my existence. She tells DH in my presence things like, "We've bought a twin bed for our summer house for single people, especially for you.", writes him an email, "You are coming to Christmas by yourself, aren't you? Jewish people ignore Christmas." , and sends sweet texts inviting him for a Valentine dinner. My frustration with a 5-year-old is for his inability to process this behavior for what it really is while being totally coherent in other aspects of life. Only as of lately I've become mature enough to deal with it myself in a satisfactory manner and not to whine like a 5-year-old girl, "She is mean. Fix it." while DH comes up with various creative interpretations of his Big Sis' unpleasant behaviors. However, it is still stressful, hence, my latest falling off the wagon episode with a dress.Most of the men with whom I have been in relationship exhibit consistently terrible behavior, so the women in their families are usually more like "Here is a casserole and a bracelet as small tokens of the deep gratitude we feel towards you for taking this one off of our hands."