For the longest time I thought that you negotiated a very favorable deal... but now I see that you have simply decided to contribute your income only to areas where you are allowed influence and control over spending decisions. He wants full control over spending for the household and himself, but because you are not involved in making these decisions, he pays for all of it. Your rule is that decision-making authority and responsibility for cost are intertwined. Is that a correct assessment? What did it take for your husband to agree to this arrangement?Clarice wrote: ↑Fri May 11, 2018 9:34 amWe continue to have our joint account where his salary is deposited and from which household bills and child care expenses are paid. He also uses it for all his personal expenses and household expenses, with which I may or may not agree (usually, a new perfect something instead of an old functional something). I have my own account, from which I pay my personal expenses and expect some day to have money to invest.
There is a logic to it, but I imagine I would ruffle some feathers if I pulled my direct deposit out of the joint account. I commend you for having the guts to pull off such a tactic... and I guess it even worked to your advantage since the gambit was declined? (What I mean by that is you are off the hook for your share of common and childcare expenses... this allows you full control over your entire income, though at the family level there's still a lot of unchecked monetary waste due to your husband's lifestyle decisions.)
I'm following your story with interest and it's giving me some ideas. Thanks and please keep up the journaling Clarice!