journal of wood

Where are you and where are you going?
EdithKeeler
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Re: journal of wood

Post by EdithKeeler » Sat Feb 10, 2018 4:21 pm

The result of that are weeks like the current one; I'm seeing 5 different women Mon-Sun this week.
I guess that explains your screen name....

Jason
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Re: journal of wood

Post by Jason » Sun Feb 11, 2018 5:55 am

Its also addressed in the ERE book under "Big Pimpin' and the Renaissance Ideal."

wood
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Re: journal of wood

Post by wood » Tue Feb 13, 2018 4:47 am

My reply was deleted after I posted it yesterday. I don't understand why as I didn't break any rules. If anyone is taking offence by what I write, I'd like to know so that I don't waste my time.

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7Wannabe5
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Re: journal of wood

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Tue Feb 13, 2018 6:24 am

Jason wrote:"The Playboy Homestead" where you charge people to come watch all your "Early Retirees" work in your garden, distill your liquor, role your tobacco and sew your robes while you lecture on the principles of ERE.
Uh-uh. I already hold patent on that concept :lol:

@wood:

Do you find yourself also maintaining a good many relationships that are no longer sexual? I am being rendered kind of grouchy by the fact that I currently have more active Exes than active Ohs. Also, the 3 individuals with whom I am currently sharing house space and/or project partnership are all EJs, so it is like being surrounded by 3 bulldozers. I currently find myself frequently resorting to dysfunctional white lie evasion to boundary time and independent project space for myself. I am supposed to meet/greet a potential new lover tomorrow, but I don't even feel like I have the energy necessary to flirt.

Jason
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Re: journal of wood

Post by Jason » Tue Feb 13, 2018 7:21 am

wood wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 4:47 am
My reply was deleted after I posted it yesterday. I don't understand why as I didn't break any rules. If anyone is taking offence by what I write, I'd like to know so that I don't waste my time.
Take it easy, Rushdie. A post you made on a privately owned website was deleted. If you added up all the one's I wrote that only briefly saw the light of pixelation, it would make "War and Peace" look like a tweet.

I read the post. After an innocuous, tongue and cheek reference to myself, it moved on to being essentially a PG-13 Penthouse Letter re: your "Love ERE Style" encounter with a Eastern European woman. My guess is they just wanted to throw it into the E-bonfire before it got to the staple. It's always subjective, but free speech doesn't exist here. And nothing personal, it's not like the Western Canon exactly lost out here.

wood
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Joined: Wed Sep 16, 2015 5:53 am

Re: journal of wood

Post by wood » Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:55 am

7Wannabe5 wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 6:24 am
@wood:

Do you find yourself also maintaining a good many relationships that are no longer sexual? I am being rendered kind of grouchy by the fact that I currently have more active Exes than active Ohs. Also, the 3 individuals with whom I am currently sharing house space and/or project partnership are all EJs, so it is like being surrounded by 3 bulldozers. I currently find myself frequently resorting to dysfunctional white lie evasion to boundary time and independent project space for myself. I am supposed to meet/greet a potential new lover tomorrow, but I don't even feel like I have the energy necessary to flirt.
I interpret your question as: "Do you stay in touch with your exes?" I define Ex's as someone you had a sexual relation with. The short answer to that is no. Not unless there is another reason to maintain some kind of relationship (professionally), let's say they're a hairdresser who is willing to cut my hair at a cheaper rate because "friends" and I will limit that relation to haircutting sessions.
I might stay in touch with them (e.g. superficial reply to some message), but I have little interest in maintaining non-sexual friendships with them on a general level, because my list of Ex's is growing bigger every month. I imagine keeping some or all of these Ex's in my circle would be a source to confusion, being on the receiving end of emotional outbursts and feeling like you have to lie.

That being said, my ex wife is currently in my friendly-circle. She is the only Ex in my friendly circle and I do not know how I will go about that when faced with the reality of a serious relationship with someone else.

Keep in mind, my encounters for the past 12 months have been in the category of f-buddies and ONS rather than serious relationships. In your case its different, because your Ex's seem to fit well with many of your non-sexual Goals in the Web. Makes it easier for them to get attached and stick. But other than that, do you have reasons for keeping them around?

I could then ask myself how does my behaviour fit into my own Web of Goals? Well one of the challenges in my life is occasionally getting hit by approach anxiety with women. I also believe this to be connected to other tendencies in me, like fear of rejection, insecurity and people-pleasing behaviour. None of these tendencies are extreme, but I realize they might have played a part in where I am today. In dealing with that I have decided to face rejection head-on, which is why I hit on new women every week. It's a difficult but fun journey to embark on.

@ Jason:
No worries, I'll tone it down and leave the details to your imagination then. It seems to be vivid.

@ EdithKeeler:
You perv!

Jason
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Re: journal of wood

Post by Jason » Tue Feb 13, 2018 11:50 am

7Wannabe5 wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 6:24 am
Jason wrote:"The Playboy Homestead" where you charge people to come watch all your "Early Retirees" work in your garden, distill your liquor, role your tobacco and sew your robes while you lecture on the principles of ERE.
Uh-uh. I already hold patent on that concept :lol:
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, she call friends...

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Family father
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Re: journal of wood

Post by Family father » Tue Feb 13, 2018 4:15 pm

Don Henley wrote: She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, she call friends...
How they dance in the courtyard

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7Wannabe5
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Re: journal of wood

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Tue Feb 13, 2018 6:13 pm

Eh, my version of polyamory is more like me ending up driving a mini-van full of grouchy old men to their yearly colonoscopy appointment while all their ex-wives are relaxing on a beach somewhere drinking Margaritas. The only upside being that it is very unlikely that I end up being the one to pick up the tab when we pull into Cracker Barrel afterwards.

Jason
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Re: journal of wood

Post by Jason » Tue Feb 13, 2018 7:30 pm

I don’t want jack Wood’s thread but damn if I understand how despite the incontrovertible evidence of a harrowing day-to-day reality you inexhaustibly defend on-going involvement on sheer theory. It’s like the relationship equivalency of the Vietnam War.

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7Wannabe5
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Re: journal of wood

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Wed Feb 14, 2018 5:51 am

wood wrote:Keep in mind, my encounters for the past 12 months have been in the category of f-buddies and ONS rather than serious relationships. In your case its different, because your Ex's seem to fit well with many of your non-sexual Goals in the Web. Makes it easier for them to get attached and stick. But other than that, do you have reasons for keeping them around?
Sorry to vent on your thread. Nobody should reply to me here. I will vent on my own thread at some point. My "ex" with whom I was significantly engaged "married", probably the love of my life thus far, reached out to me a few days after several years of silence after our last bad break-up, so that upset me a bit. Even when I was practicing strict serial monogamy, it has been a frequent occurrence in my life that exes will show up again out of nowhere. Also, I am forever one degree removed attached to my highly depressive 20 year long marital ex who is the father of my children, and he attempted suicide this past year. I am still pen-pals with my married polyamorous lover who feels I was one of the major loves of his life. I am actually in legal partnership contract with my ex-FB permaculture buddy who still occasionally tries to hit me up for sex. I am also obviously very engaged with my current BF, his social circle, and his wilderness project, but although I hold him in strong affectionate regard we do not have a very vibrant sex life and he has other ties outstanding, so...somehow I ended up agreeing to meet a new potential lover for coffee on Valentine's Day.
Jason wrote:I don’t want jack Wood’s thread but damn if I understand how despite the incontrovertible evidence of a harrowing day-to-day reality you inexhaustibly defend on-going involvement on sheer theory. It’s like the relationship equivalency of the Vietnam War.
Oh, I was overstating the case in reaction to the notion that "pretty, pretty boys" is a valid description of my circle. When I am in a better mood or mode functioning, I can be as happy with the situation as Shirley Temple tap-dancing on the good ship lollipop, surrounded by mature devoted dance partners.

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