Five Years, Lord Willing

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Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Sun Aug 20, 2017 11:46 am

Thank you Frugalchicos. Maybe I will follow you to the Basque country. I could work in your restaurant, serving your delicious Pinxtos to all the wonderful people of Spain.

Despite recent events, from all accounts, Barcelona is also beautiful and clean. Plus, its a language I could learn.

Spain. I'm digging it. Well, except the bullfighting. Why in the world do people find it exciting to run through the streets being chased by a bull? I mean the risk/reward quotient is completely imbalanced. If a good result is that you are alive and weren't anally impaled by an incensed bull, I don't see why you would voluntarily engage in such an activity in the first place.

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Frugalchicos
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Frugalchicos » Sun Aug 20, 2017 2:39 pm

Sounds like a plan, as far as you are also able to be sarcastic in Spanish :lol:

I feel exactly the same about the bull fighting, there is no fucking need to kill a bull in such a way. I actually feel some short of joy when the stupid bullfighter gets a horn in between his balls...

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fiby41
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by fiby41 » Mon Aug 21, 2017 12:55 am

Jason wrote:
Sun Aug 20, 2017 11:46 am

Spain. I'm digging it. Well, except the bullfighting. Why in the world do people find it exciting to run through the streets being chased by a bull? I mean the risk/reward quotient is completely imbalanced. If a good result is that you are alive and weren't anally impaled by an incensed bull, I don't see why you would voluntarily engage in such an activity in the first place.
Frugalchicos wrote:
Sun Aug 20, 2017 2:39 pm

I feel exactly the same about the bull fighting, there is no fucking need to kill a bull in such a way. I actually feel some short of joy when the stupid bullfighter gets a horn in between his balls...
I find it marvelous that such cultural festivals carry on without government intervention.
In my country bull racing festivals have to get permission from the judiciary every year.
Another similarity between the Spanish and Hindu culture is building the human pyramids. We make human pyramids to celebrate Krishna's birth which fell on 14th August (last week) this year. Unfortunately the court dictates everything from the age of participants to number of levels/tiers of the human pyramids.

However the judiciary does not intervene in backward Muslim practices like animal sacrifices on Eid on grounds of secularism and religious freedom. Apparently racing domestic bulls during agricultural downtime to keep them healthy is cruelty to animals but slaughtering them is not.

7Wannabe5
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Mon Aug 21, 2017 5:29 am

You forgot the "Now." Comes after the majestic plural object pronoun. Sounds better that way.

Julie Andrews (Edwards) was also the author of one of my favorite books when I was a child. "Mandy" is the story of a little orphan girl who climbs over the orphanage wall and discovers a small abandoned cottage which she fixes up to make a home for herself. Eventually, she is rescued from her plight by the affluent man on a large black horse who owns the estate upon which her scavenged cottage is located. From adult perspective, I can see that the moral of this story, like many 19th century British novels, is that the practice of good, frugal housekeeping will get you well-laid. Unfortunately, it has been my experience that this is not exactly true.

Anyways, good observation on Switzerland. I think Switzerland is more like the kid everybody agrees should be the banker when playing Monopoly.

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Mon Aug 21, 2017 7:18 am

I'm sorry to hear that. Maybe watch Mary Poppins again. Her umbrella was always going up in that one.

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Fri Aug 25, 2017 7:41 am

Yesterday I was shooting the shit with my Muslim crew. One of them had an emergency gall bladder operation. The whole thing was removed. I asked "Don't you need that shit?" Nobody seemed to know exactly, but the fact that he was still alive albeit a little gaunt seemed to indicate that the answer was no. We got into a whole discussion how God supplies the body with unnecessary parts in order that they be used in other places. Like spare tires. Or the piece left over after you build an Ikea desk.

The point of the story? None at all.

This morning I got my ass reemed out for being negative. I am negative. I am going to try to be positive going forward. Its going to be very difficult but I am going to force myself. Its self control of the mind which I never developed.

halfmoon
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by halfmoon » Fri Aug 25, 2017 9:35 am

Unless it was your wife complaining about your attitude...who cares? If it was your wife, then from God's lips to your ears: straighten up and fly right.

Your brand of dark humor doesn't seem so negative to me. Actually, I'd call a married man who repeatedly mentions hookers and blow jobs unrealistically hopeful. :P

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Frugalchicos
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Frugalchicos » Fri Aug 25, 2017 9:45 am

Good Morning Jason,

As you said, being negative is just a trained habit. Sometimes being positive means protecting yourself of being overexposed to the news channels, reading too much about how the world is doing (there is always some short of apocalyptic/the sky is falling feeling going on). Or perhaps, you just need to be a little bit more selfish and only worry about your closest significant others and friends (I bet you will do just fine with this one).

Think about the amazing goal you are accomplishing and all the good things that come with it. I recommend the book The Art of Happiness.

All the best!

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Fri Aug 25, 2017 10:19 am

@ Halmoon

You are right. Why should I care that some hooker calls me negative just because I suggest she's not blowing me properly.

@Frugalchicos

Your encouragement is like the ERE wind beneath my nutsack.

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Sat Aug 26, 2017 7:28 am

Good News: Some found money, which happens in my line of work. $8.5k to be paid over two years. I believe I will knock 20K off my mortgage this year.

Bad News: NO BAD NEWS!!! I'M NOW AN OPTIMIST! EVERYTHING IS GREAT!!! I AM AT TOTAL PEACE!!!

Other News: About 10 years ago, we almost adopted a Chinese girl. We didn't have her picked out, but let's face it, they all look the same. I made excuses for why we didn't do it but ultimately I was scared, primarily about money. Some days it saddens me. Thinking I could have had a little flat ass girl running around the place, sitting her on my knee, explaining how her government only wanted boys and if it wasn't for me she would have most likely spent her life as a sex slave or working in some dangerous factory with clothes pins keeping her little slanty eyes open. Oh well. I guess there are worse things than dying sad and all alone, although I can't think of any at the moment. Looks like I need to work harder at this optimist bullshit.

suomalainen
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by suomalainen » Sat Aug 26, 2017 10:13 pm

(Weak) chin up, you won't die alone. You'll die before DW. Pessimists have shorter lifespans, dontchaknow?

halfmoon
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by halfmoon » Sat Aug 26, 2017 10:55 pm

It may be little consolation, but having/adopting a child is no warranty against dying sad and alone. I'm not sure that sad and alone are even related. It's utterly possible to have people around you until the bitter end who make you sad and/or mad (see Sclass' stories), and they might well be your children. Better to cultivate those who actually like you independent of any gratitude for having spawned them or saved them from life as a sex/factory slave. Your wife comes to mind as someone to cultivate. :P

Noedig
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Noedig » Sat Aug 26, 2017 11:58 pm

Agree with halfmoon.

Jason, we simply can't have you turning into an optimist. It would detract from the tone of your observations.

Less Zen and Pollyanna-eyed optimism. More salty metaphors involving asian ladies working in the service economy! So say I.

Also, and at further risk of collapsing some delicate flower of regret and reminiscence, I would say that mine own dear two children are utter impediments to ERE. Oh yes, quite forget about that. I am braced for further drains upon the parental exchequer in time to come.

It could have been still worse - the marginal utility of a third child, as Milton Friedman might have put it, was considered and rejected.

Perhaps time for Frank Sinatra now to hint this topic should be curtailed: "Rugrats, I have a few, but then again, two few to mention"

But warming to the underlying theme of of regret, I will share that I have myself some corking ones :
.... that I went to college to study something uninteresting, hard, and time-consuming, that I have never used
.....that my first serious relationship was with an alcoholic.
.....Joyless life denying father (not really sure I can class this as a regret, as not my work, but what the hell it's my pity party so it's here)
.....that I put up with utter bullcrap for years with another partner before putting a stop to it
.....that I have invested too much time in work. This is on the one hand a classic "No Shinola, Sherlock" perception, but there is always a limiting condition to getting what you want out of life. I thought for the longest time that it was Money (well, having no money/plenty insecurity does incline one that way), and then after encountering ERE I thought it was Time, and now I understand that actually and really truly it is Health.

Yet .... we still suck down air. Experience is waiting to be garnered and and shared, and, Yes! the future may once again yet be ours for a time, a string of brighter moments, before we inevitably fold into the embrace of the Dark. Or as you might say, of the Douchebag.

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Sun Aug 27, 2017 6:58 am

Yeah, I guess I didn't think that through. I could spare that little Ch*nk a life of living under a rice bowl and in the end I'm suffering the ravages of alzheimers and she's forging my name on life insurance policies with all her fellow hard talking, criminally minded adopted Ch*nk friends. That's not to say there wouldn't have been some intermediate joy in all the math and science awards she racked up as a youngster.

I actually hope I die after my wife. I don't want her to be alone. But I'm starting to get the impression that she doesn't feel the same way.

That's interesting Noedig about health. I will factor that in.

I regretted how I spent my college years and I was plagued by dreams of failing tests, not handing in papers, missing entire year of class so I went back for Master's studies and did everything right. I still have those fuckin dreams.

slowtraveler
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by slowtraveler » Mon Aug 28, 2017 11:36 am

Did going back and "doing everything right" help?

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Mon Aug 28, 2017 4:20 pm

Absolutely:

(1) I don't believe in self-forgiveness but I could look back and say "Ok I was 18 and spoiled and immature. But there is still a tremendous amount of shame. I mean I spent my whole sophomore year trying to bang every girl on campus named "Lisa." I could have done an independent study instead of that shit. That being said, I definitely had the stupid college experience. And as an FYI, I only got to three Lisas but one a super fuckin hot nursing student. I had no clue what to do with her and I came quicker than it takes to make minute rice. She just picked up a nursing book and started highlighting. Damn that was a lonely bus ride home.

(2) Being around people just out of undergrad, I realized how remedial Undergrad actually is. I also speak to current undergrads and realize how atomized it can be.

(3) I realized that education can help but not solve.

(4) Ironically, I subscribe to the Witherspoon Institute and this article came in:

http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2017/ ... a-84193757

Maturity calls for a reassessment of education and I got mine. I couldn't finish because of distance and time but I worked it out of my system. Also, there is a "Give a man a fish, he eats for a day, teach a man how to fish, he eats for a lifetime." That is really the purpose of education. To provide tools to continue throughout your life i.e discipline, focus, et. al and to develop a vision as to why you are doing it.

Thank you for asking Felipe. I enjoyed getting this out.

wood
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by wood » Wed Aug 30, 2017 5:58 am

Tell us about the other Lisa's

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Wed Aug 30, 2017 8:20 am

Lisa #1: Rich, tony chick from Connecticut that me and my friend Pat fought over. I won that one. As cute as a girl can be without being considered beautiful, dressed in that boho-chic style that I soon realized was partly to cover an ass that belonged on a long haul trucker. She dumped me for Freddy, who by all objective standards and general public opinion, was a vertically upward move as he was better looking and could actually get away with carrying his books in a leather satchel. If I had to guess she is a videographer and one of those fat women with a really wide but flat ass so it appears that someone kicked her ass into her stomach and that other women feel superior to when they compliment her by saying "but she has such a pretty face."

Lisa #2: Punkish rocker chick that I feel really bad about because she had a very public relationship with her punker rocker boyfriend named LJ who loved the shit out of her and had a meltdown when I was dry humping her in her dorm room. That was really callous as I didn't stop even with all the hysterical screaming going on outside. She introduced me to Siouxie and The Banshees cover of "Dear Prudence" for which I am eternally grateful for. I'm guessing she managed an independent record store out of college but then married, had a couple of kids and has been swallowed into suburban oblivion like most of us.

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Fri Sep 01, 2017 6:24 am

Good News: Not sure. The sun is up. I'm alive. My wife is still here. I'm not in a situation that would be of interest to law enforcement. My psychiatrist once suggested I make a list of my top qualities. When I couldn't think of any he said "well, your clothes match."

Bad News: I bought books. They were unavailable in the library because they are new and related to a specific topic and of course I had to have them. Now. Every time the UPS guy comes with my book he looks at me like I need a shot of Narcan. I have 20 books I'm working on right now. I need help. Help.

Other News: I go through periods of crippling fear and wretched anxiety. I'm in one now. The nicest guy in my high school class died two years ago on his birthday. He was a psychiatrist. Once you get to a certain age you realize that all the experts were just the people you went to high school with and you realize why the world is such a mess.

2Birds1Stone
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by 2Birds1Stone » Fri Sep 01, 2017 8:17 am

6 pages of your journal got me through an especially slow morning at work.

Hat's off to your progress since the beginning of the year. Keep the posts coming :)

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Sun Sep 03, 2017 2:26 pm

Small Victory Report

I just found out that a condo similar to mine is renting out at a number that would actually allow for a profit, albeit small one, if I did same. That means my cost of living expenses are finally hedged against inflation. After years of being on the wrong end of that, it feels nice. Now if only the value went up to the price we paid for it.

Our net worth is stagnating around 435K. For many months my weekly Mint Money reports were like a hot drunk girl coming over every weekend and blowing me. Now its like the same girl coming and passing out on the couch. Some weeks, she actually raids the fridge and then passes out on the couch. I 'm not sure if that analogy works but try to work with it. I don't really have any analogies that don't use blow jobs. Its not like I'm fucking Keats who was closer to nature and had the benefit of opium.

Walter Becker of Steely Dan died. We lived next door to the their manager's sister. I know who gives a shit. Its just that you reach an age where every death is like removing a cinder block in the foundation of your youth. I didn't know him. And Donald Fagen pretty much admitted to being a Pedo (Hey 19) but whatever. He's dead. Like most people come to think of it. Right? More people have died then are currently living? Who knows. It has occurred to me that if I had lived in the middle ages I would have never seen this age. I might not even have reached the age where I could have received a blow job let alone use it as an analogy at the village Inn with all the other drunken and decaying syphilitics which if I have lived I would have surely been because what else could you turn out to be back then. Actually, I'm surprised I'm not that now come to think of it. I'm assuming everything was rushed back then because everyone knows they're going to die soon and if they don't they think Jesus is returning after lunch. Damn. The sun is out, I shouldn't be thinking of syphillis and death.

halfmoon
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by halfmoon » Sun Sep 03, 2017 8:45 pm

Jason wrote:
Fri Sep 01, 2017 6:24 am
Its just that you reach an age where every death is like removing a cinder block in the foundation of your youth.
Not to be dark (Ha! I couldn't begin to compete with you on that), but every minute of adult life is literally removing a cinder block in the foundation of your youth. It's a natural, relentless process of attrition. There's emotional growth to compensate, but overall it's a massive long-term capital loss balanced by .005% interest on your savings account.

Wow...I sound like you, Jason -- minus the blowjob references. Here be dragons. Back to counting my blessings.

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Mon Sep 04, 2017 7:40 am

Emotional growth? Is that what I've been supposed to be doing? I have no clue about life, I really don't. As our great leader would say "Sad."

I just read and hear about people dying, some who have accomplished a lot, some who have done jack shit and the world moves on.

That brings me to story time: Marianne Faithful was one of the most beautiful women on the planet in the mid-60's. Every rock star in England was fighting over her. She's the inspiration of more classic rock songs than any chick in history. It's like her vagina was a juke box, except instead of a quarter, you stick a penis in it and a great song would come out. So I worked in the industry and I knew someone who was her personal assistant and she said I could go with her over to her apartment. I could barely keep myself together. We walk in and there's this middle aged, self absorbed woman with smoker's voice handing out crumpled up bills so we could do her grocery shopping. I remember thinking I wouldn't fuck her with Brian Jones' dead dick.

First your dreams and then you.

7Wannabe5
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Mon Sep 04, 2017 11:36 am

She probably had bi-polar disease, but she wasn't "lit" when you met her. Only one of my sisters is conventionally beautiful, but between the 4 of us, we are less than 2 degrees of bandmate/sexual-romantic-partner separation from large swath of the musical industry. Arcade Fire, MC5, White Stripes, Peaches and Herb, Parliament, The Fucking Champs...

Oddly, both you and Jacob somehow strike me as variations on possible brothers we never had. Small planet in some ways.

Jason
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Re: Five Years, Lord Willing

Post by Jason » Mon Sep 04, 2017 12:10 pm

Yes, she was bi-polar and I would never denigrate the affects that has on someone. My point is that the idea of sticking a candy bar up her holy of holies was not even remotely under consideration.

I never had a sister. Although there is a rumor my mother did give birth to a girl but promptly ate her. But the idea of having four of them that were the pit stop for every decent band that passed through town would have been been cool. And I do wish JLF was there to stop me from buying all those now worthless baseball cards.

But I have to ask. Peaches and Herb. Was that you? I'm assuming you are a white chick so was that jungle fever, lady love, or both? I got to imagine Herb was packing some serious heat.

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