Early Retirement Extreme Forums

Wow, talk about a great update! I'm sorry to hear about your mother's diagnosis, but very glad that you'll get to enjoy life with her in her twilight years. I think having the ability to be there for your parents when they need it most is another great function of FU money or FI.

Your post has reminded me that I need to email my Grandma and see how she's doing. I try to keep it touch regularly and it's been a minute. My other three grandparents all passed by the time I was in my late teens and if there is one true regret I have it would be not having learned more about their lives. Specifically life during wartime/in the service.

Wow, new house, new job ... congrats!

Great turn of events. There is a lot to be said about living the life that makes you happy. Good to see the job promotion will give more pay and fulfillment.

Sounds like a good balance.

Just back from a last minute business trip for my new job. Gotta day: it kicked my ass. It’s become very clear I need to improve my nutrition and my fitness level. I’m writing this here so I can remind myself to step it the fuck up!!!

EdithKeeler, remember how shitty you felt marathoning it thru multiple airports? Do you WANT to feel that way? I think not. You know what to do!!

Before you start exercising and getting in shape or whatever, have you considered accelerating getting out of shape until you are one of those people who get the wheelchair service? Not only do they pushed through the airport, they are a priority passenger getting on and off the plane. Ultimately, you are going to end up there any ways, it seems to me that getting in shape is just an interruption before that which is inevitable occurs. Big deal you can run through an airport. That shit is old. It's not like someone's going to say "Look at that woman running through an airport, let's make a Hertz commercial with her like that guy who murdered his ex-wife after he looked inside her window and saw her going down on her waiter." Running for a plane is for losers. Being pushed while drinking a coffee watching losers run for an airplane now that's what I call winning.

Before you start exercising and getting in shape or whatever, have you considered accelerating getting out of shape until you are one of those people who get the wheelchair service? Not only do they pushed through the airport, they are a priority passenger getting on and off the plane.

I do see your point.... and I’m gonna be honest: in two different airports those dudes on the scooter things stopped and asked me if I needed a ride. I know I was limping a bit from a fractured toe, but damn, that was embarrassing and made me feel fucking OLD and decrepit. It was tempting, though, but my wounded pride wouldn’t let me.

I actually don’t care if I can leap over stuff like OJ (look where that got him anyway), but I don’t want to be the old lady who needs the scooter, either.

Just yet.

EdithKeeler wrote: ↑

Fri May 17, 2019 12:15 pm

though, but my wounded pride wouldn’t let me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruhFmBrl4GM

Quick EOM update: turns out the reason I felt so shitty after my business trip is because I had PNEUMONIA!! (At least in part—I still need to get into shape). So, two weeks of feeling like crap, lots of drugs, lots of sleep, a few sick days....I’m finally on the mend. Today’s really the first day since I got home that I can say I feel pretty good.

And in the midst of that, still managed to get moved. Well, my stuff is here, but definitely have a lot of work to do to get stuff where it needs to be. But it’s all good, and I still LOVE my new house!

Apparently, though, I have lost a relationship. Shortly before the business trip I started getting irritating one-word responses to emails, and silence on the other end of the phone. Well, I freakin hate that passive aggressive shit. When I asked what the issue was, it started out about a conversation we had about movies (it’s always the important stuff, right?). I had teased him about a movie he loved and recommended and that I absolutely hated. Somehow he took what I meant as light-hearted joking seriously....(and I explained AND apologized), but then it turned into a discussion about he feels like I complain a lot (and I will admit to wanting a little emotional support during those few bad weeks with my mom so maybe a little bit of a point there), but then he went into how complaining can be like bragging to people who don’t have as much as you do.... it was odd. And there was no further explanation despite my attempts to discuss. And now it’s radio silence.

I really don’t know what the hell happened. I know he’s a bit old school with respect to man/woman money/provider stuff, but he’s been semi-retired or retired as long as we’ve been together (10 years) and we’ve both paid our own way, etc. He knows I have a career that right now is going pretty well. When I first made the offer on the house, we talked a good bit about him coming to visit more.

So I dunno. I’m a little sad, a little mad, and right now a lot irritated. But maybe not surprised. And as I think about it, I’ve sort of liked the long distance relationship thing. Intimate.... but not too. Lots of space, lots of personal time and freedom. But maybe I’ve been short changing myself.

Anyway. I may be asking for dating advice soon.

I'm sorry about the relationship EK.

It's weird how sometimes we can go through major changes -- with you it's a new job, new house, newly single -- even when we don't really intend to. Being resilient isn't just about being ready for STHF scenarios, it's about being ready for when you have your own personal upheaval (good or bad). Even with being sick and the end of your relationship, you sound good. That's a good indication of how strong you are.

EdithKeeler wrote: ↑

Fri May 31, 2019 7:09 pm

I had teased him about a movie he loved and recommended and that I absolutely hated.

I could see how that "crack" could turn into a canyon. Especially between a man and woman. It's like a fault line that turns into an earthquake and all the shit just falls into it. The issues were obviously already there, like feelings of intellectual inferiority or cultural aspirations or whatever and this just precipitated everything.

What was the movie?

What was the movie?

“The Lobster.”

Being resilient isn't just about being ready for STHF scenarios, it's about being ready for when you have your own personal upheaval (good or bad). Even with being sick and the end of your relationship, you sound good. That's a good indication of how strong you are.

Thanks. I feel good about life in general right now. Not that everything is sunshine and roses, obviously, but I feel like I can HANDLE it, you know? Sounds dumb, but was I had the stray thought yesterday that I finally feel like a grown up. Weird...

And ERE tie in: since things are going pretty well, I don’t feel that need—like I did 5-6 years ago—to cut loose and quit my job and retire super early. I guess at this moment I don’t really feel like I’m missing doing anything I want to do, or at least that can’t wait a bit. The job is interesting and challenging, which will keep me going until it’s not (which will likely happen in a year or so knowing me!), the money’s good and will help me feather my nest to be ready when it is time to quit, and I guess right at this moment, given the constraints in my life (mother—and I don’t mean constraint as a bad thing—I want her around as long as possible!!) , I just don’t have much desire or inclination to chuck it all and live in a tiny house at the beach or whatever.

I guess—at this moment in my life (sure to change!)—I feel content. It’s a weird feeling for me.

EdithKeeler wrote: ↑

Sat Jun 01, 2019 8:19 am

...I feel content.

Just a friendly reminder: if you still feel like this after three weeks, we'll boot you from team ENTJ.


Agency EK; I guess you're feeling the effects of being in control of your existence.

EdithKeeler wrote: ↑

Sat Jun 01, 2019 8:07 am

“The Lobster.”

"Robert is caught masturbating and the hotel manager burns his fingers in a toaster."

I can see why he dumped you.

ENTP here so I get the restlessness. I do notice that as I’m getting older, feeling content is easier. Is your mood a function of your circumstances or from within?

Some relationships fade and others just disappear. The latter seems to trigger lots of emotions.

Congrats on the new house and new job!! I hope you get a huge boost in life contentment Sorry about the guy.

Six months ago, I opened an Acorns account where they round up your purchases to the nearest dollar and deposit it into an investment account (mutual fund). I also set it up to put in $10 each Thursday. Just a little extra thing.

Sometime in December, in an effort to curtail my eating out, I made a deal with myself to put $10 in every day that I didn’t eat out at all. This included not buying anything as small as a coffee or snacks from the machine.

I’ve also dumped in another $25 most paydays, and I think I put in $100 when I got my bonus.

Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised to see that the balance hit $1500 today. Not bad with just little dribs and drabs here and there. It feels like free money.

Congrats on the new house and new job!! I hope you get a huge boost in life contentment Sorry about the guy.

Thanks! I’m sorry about the guy, too. But I love the house!

EdithKeeler wrote: ↑

Fri May 31, 2019 7:09 pm

Anyway. I may be asking for dating advice soon.

Careful what you wish for...

EdithKeeler wrote: ↑

Sat Jun 01, 2019 8:19 am

I guess—at this moment in my life (sure to change!)—I feel content. It’s a weird feeling for me.

Hi five, soul sista! Here's to weirdness!

You and DBF will be back together before the end of this year. Wanna bet?