I'm with m741, I considered the striking off the days, but I couldn't bear to see my life in through that perspective. Even though when you've finally reached that target quit day, I'm sure it doesn't feel like a waste b/c you're too busy celebrating.
However, I'm desperate for motivation to "get through" this final year of full-time corporate drudgery, so I'm going to do a countdown post at the end where I celebrate the end of the month/one month closer to freedom. In this post I'll also celebrate my achievements: monetary, business-wise, career, and personal.
This way I'm counting down, but I don't feel like my time is wasted. I'll feel like I'm bettering myself, in preparation for pursuing my dreams/life of leisure.
bigato's journal
So bigato,
I've been there. Not with this current role, as I really do love this company and its senior leadership team. The problem here is no mobility, having to (so far successfully) wean colleagues off of me being the team workhorse, and my direct manager, who's messing with me.
What I have on my side is seniority, a hard-to-replace skillset, and reputation of excellence BEFORE manager came here.
BUT, I was in almost the exact same position you are in at my old job. And what it sounds like to me, is that someone above you has put a target on your back. There could be several reasons why this target is on your back (NONE of them having to do with you):
1. They want your job
2. They have a friend that wants your job
3. They need to downsize the department
4. You're standing in the way of someone's promotion
I'm almost guessing that the main answer is 3 and 4. Perhaps they think you are too expensive for the position you are in, or maybe they ARE downsizing.
Whatever. Whether or not your employer wants you around is actually not your problem. It's theirs. Your job, as in you owe it to yourself, is to not let them win this little game of torment and intimidation they are playing, trying to get you fired or even better (and cheaper!) -- to quit.
I say, ignore those bastards, keep your head down and keep doing what your doing. If you want to sick around longer to maximize earnings by not getting fired, then do so.
If you want to keep plugging along, making no above-and-beyond effort, then do that to -- especially if the WORST that could happen is that you get a big fat severance check.
These people bullying you are NOTHING. They won't matter in 2 years when you're ERE, and they DON'T MATTER NOW.
Let them write all the negative things they want about you. Let them lie through their teeth about your performance, or exaggerate any mistakes you make. Just document everything and develop a relationship with your HR person. Play dumb, and give HR person a weekly/biweekly/monthly updates on your bullying and the good things you've been doing. This will help build your case.
When me and my former colleagues/friends look back at what we went through at company X, we have to laugh. We seriously thought our lives were over and that working for this company was the end all and be all. But we didn't let them chase us out of the place, we stood firm until they PAID us for our trouble when we got laid off.
Stay strong, and if you can, keep your eyes open and see if others are going through the same thing you are. Trust me: 2, 3, 4 heads are better than 1.
I've been there. Not with this current role, as I really do love this company and its senior leadership team. The problem here is no mobility, having to (so far successfully) wean colleagues off of me being the team workhorse, and my direct manager, who's messing with me.
What I have on my side is seniority, a hard-to-replace skillset, and reputation of excellence BEFORE manager came here.
BUT, I was in almost the exact same position you are in at my old job. And what it sounds like to me, is that someone above you has put a target on your back. There could be several reasons why this target is on your back (NONE of them having to do with you):
1. They want your job
2. They have a friend that wants your job
3. They need to downsize the department
4. You're standing in the way of someone's promotion
I'm almost guessing that the main answer is 3 and 4. Perhaps they think you are too expensive for the position you are in, or maybe they ARE downsizing.
Whatever. Whether or not your employer wants you around is actually not your problem. It's theirs. Your job, as in you owe it to yourself, is to not let them win this little game of torment and intimidation they are playing, trying to get you fired or even better (and cheaper!) -- to quit.
I say, ignore those bastards, keep your head down and keep doing what your doing. If you want to sick around longer to maximize earnings by not getting fired, then do so.
If you want to keep plugging along, making no above-and-beyond effort, then do that to -- especially if the WORST that could happen is that you get a big fat severance check.
These people bullying you are NOTHING. They won't matter in 2 years when you're ERE, and they DON'T MATTER NOW.
Let them write all the negative things they want about you. Let them lie through their teeth about your performance, or exaggerate any mistakes you make. Just document everything and develop a relationship with your HR person. Play dumb, and give HR person a weekly/biweekly/monthly updates on your bullying and the good things you've been doing. This will help build your case.
When me and my former colleagues/friends look back at what we went through at company X, we have to laugh. We seriously thought our lives were over and that working for this company was the end all and be all. But we didn't let them chase us out of the place, we stood firm until they PAID us for our trouble when we got laid off.
Stay strong, and if you can, keep your eyes open and see if others are going through the same thing you are. Trust me: 2, 3, 4 heads are better than 1.
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aussierogue
- Posts: 379
- Joined: Thu Nov 10, 2011 1:02 pm
We cant control many / most situations but we can control how we react to them. Try and visualise yourself getting through each day with grace and your chin held high.......and then go for it.
The problem for many of us is the build up of stress after many many years in bad work related situations. After time many of us instead of getting more resilient infact we get weaker. It happened to me.
I realised that infact it could be clinical. I went through a period of high stress due to bad work and wife being sick. where i cried to my doctor. With the doctors help i realised i was suffering from mild depression but depression non the less.
Even though i am a high achiever i sometime achieve inspite / despite my depression. This can happen. I also know that it is genetic and 30 years ago my father was diagnosed as bi polar. I am not bi polar but i have succestablities i need to be careful of. For me its all about understanding who i am and what the triggers are that make me unhappy.
So mental health is a big thing for me - just as weight loss or a bad back could be a big thing for someone else. If i was fat i may spend 1 hour per day in the gym getting fit. With my depression i make an effort to spend 1 hour per day on spiritual things that nourish my soul. I NEED to do this as i said because mental health doesnt come easy for some of us.
So while i was running a large company i started to leed a strange double life where i would visit buddhist meditation centres during my lunch hour. Eventually i also obtained a meditation diploma that now allows me to teaxh meditation techniques. It was strange leeding a corporate existense and then at the same time having this spiritual journey.
One thing i can tell you for sure.....those midday 45 minute meditations at the buddhist centre (with 10-15 other corporate / city people) made me fresh and helped me cope better with some of lifes stresses. Immediate effect.
Bigato - i am not sure if any that is relevant to you except to say you are not alone.
Cheers
Aussie
The problem for many of us is the build up of stress after many many years in bad work related situations. After time many of us instead of getting more resilient infact we get weaker. It happened to me.
I realised that infact it could be clinical. I went through a period of high stress due to bad work and wife being sick. where i cried to my doctor. With the doctors help i realised i was suffering from mild depression but depression non the less.
Even though i am a high achiever i sometime achieve inspite / despite my depression. This can happen. I also know that it is genetic and 30 years ago my father was diagnosed as bi polar. I am not bi polar but i have succestablities i need to be careful of. For me its all about understanding who i am and what the triggers are that make me unhappy.
So mental health is a big thing for me - just as weight loss or a bad back could be a big thing for someone else. If i was fat i may spend 1 hour per day in the gym getting fit. With my depression i make an effort to spend 1 hour per day on spiritual things that nourish my soul. I NEED to do this as i said because mental health doesnt come easy for some of us.
So while i was running a large company i started to leed a strange double life where i would visit buddhist meditation centres during my lunch hour. Eventually i also obtained a meditation diploma that now allows me to teaxh meditation techniques. It was strange leeding a corporate existense and then at the same time having this spiritual journey.
One thing i can tell you for sure.....those midday 45 minute meditations at the buddhist centre (with 10-15 other corporate / city people) made me fresh and helped me cope better with some of lifes stresses. Immediate effect.
Bigato - i am not sure if any that is relevant to you except to say you are not alone.
Cheers
Aussie
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LiquidSapphire
- Posts: 510
- Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 6:40 pm
How exciting! I'm very happy for you. Best of luck in getting this change in work, I think it sounds very promising. Maybe there are some videos, DVDs, or online courses you can recommend to your current clients to help them continue their training on their own. And you will return someday when you are FIRE and you will resume your classes, of course! So it is not forever.
I came back with a very good tip for saving on my current highest expense, that is whole rice.
Wow. Rice as your highest expense. That really is something incredible. Nice.
On the feeling lazy part, I think everyone goes through periods of more or less activity, even those who are super productive. I go through low periods myself and what I generally gets me out of it is making sure I'm doing the productive things that I enjoy the most. The other thing is just to get started. I find on the weekends if I get up early and do something productive and active (not something on the computer) that I end up doing good stuff for most of the day... The hurdle is just to get started.
Wow. Rice as your highest expense. That really is something incredible. Nice.
On the feeling lazy part, I think everyone goes through periods of more or less activity, even those who are super productive. I go through low periods myself and what I generally gets me out of it is making sure I'm doing the productive things that I enjoy the most. The other thing is just to get started. I find on the weekends if I get up early and do something productive and active (not something on the computer) that I end up doing good stuff for most of the day... The hurdle is just to get started.
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aussierogue
- Posts: 379
- Joined: Thu Nov 10, 2011 1:02 pm
Bigato - hope you are well
I have lots of spare time and sometime i do nothing much at all. Passion and energy imo is cyclical. Eccelsiastes (the bible) says there is a time everything under the sun...and that also includes contemplation and idleness. Dont worry its not a personality trait....i can tell from the brief dialgue you and i have had. Take your time and soon enuf you will be up and running with another new idea, task to complete. Enjoy the downtime!
I have lots of spare time and sometime i do nothing much at all. Passion and energy imo is cyclical. Eccelsiastes (the bible) says there is a time everything under the sun...and that also includes contemplation and idleness. Dont worry its not a personality trait....i can tell from the brief dialgue you and i have had. Take your time and soon enuf you will be up and running with another new idea, task to complete. Enjoy the downtime!
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LiquidSapphire
- Posts: 510
- Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 6:40 pm
Sounds like you have a good plan without my help... join the testing process for the IT job and in 5 mo you will have a better idea if you want to take it or not. Sounds like win win to me!
On the land - maybe you can work out some kind of arrangement where you pay the guy to live on it for those 2 years and take care of it while you're in the city? Or he can rent it from you for a reduced price those 2 years?
You're right that uprooting your whole life for just 1-2 years is likely not worth it, I've come to the same conclusion, unless you're really unhappy where you are.
I'm glad things have really turned around for you! One other thing to think about - if you take the IT job, will that give you freelance/telework opportunities, so when you ERE, you will have the ability to work part time or on various projects/contracts as you want? It seems that would be harder to do with banking.
On the land - maybe you can work out some kind of arrangement where you pay the guy to live on it for those 2 years and take care of it while you're in the city? Or he can rent it from you for a reduced price those 2 years?
You're right that uprooting your whole life for just 1-2 years is likely not worth it, I've come to the same conclusion, unless you're really unhappy where you are.
I'm glad things have really turned around for you! One other thing to think about - if you take the IT job, will that give you freelance/telework opportunities, so when you ERE, you will have the ability to work part time or on various projects/contracts as you want? It seems that would be harder to do with banking.
I'm not sure I know enough about the situation to give advice, but I would recommend staying where you are.
You have an extremely low cost living arrangement. You have a secure job. Rather than try to make big changes and take risks, try making your current life better by figuring out how to improve things incrementally where you are.
I have applied for other jobs when unsatisfied with my current job, and by the time I got my interviews and it came down to a decision, the crisis at my current job had passed and there did not seem to be a need to move to something new. I never have had a job offer with a big increase in pay from what I have now, so that is one thing I would consider moving to a new job for. But for the most part, I prefer to stay where I am and just make small improvements in life. The best improvements are those made in my way of thinking.
You have an extremely low cost living arrangement. You have a secure job. Rather than try to make big changes and take risks, try making your current life better by figuring out how to improve things incrementally where you are.
I have applied for other jobs when unsatisfied with my current job, and by the time I got my interviews and it came down to a decision, the crisis at my current job had passed and there did not seem to be a need to move to something new. I never have had a job offer with a big increase in pay from what I have now, so that is one thing I would consider moving to a new job for. But for the most part, I prefer to stay where I am and just make small improvements in life. The best improvements are those made in my way of thinking.
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LiquidSapphire
- Posts: 510
- Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 6:40 pm
That was a nice entry -- you seem to be finding some peace and satisfaction.
I thought this passage was particularly metaphorical and lyrical in the context of personal growth:
"The little boulders I'm removing are being used now in two rows to make a "path" from the house to the street. It's beautiful. Well, at least it seems beautiful to me. The smaller rocks, I'm still thinking what to do with them. It seems that I have loads and loads of rocks in the back of the property. I discovered that a small lever (a small pry bar) is more than enough to remove then. But I'm talking about rocks of the size you can carry with your hands, not bigger than that. I'm getting calluses on my hands and satisfaction from this kind of work."
I thought this passage was particularly metaphorical and lyrical in the context of personal growth:
"The little boulders I'm removing are being used now in two rows to make a "path" from the house to the street. It's beautiful. Well, at least it seems beautiful to me. The smaller rocks, I'm still thinking what to do with them. It seems that I have loads and loads of rocks in the back of the property. I discovered that a small lever (a small pry bar) is more than enough to remove then. But I'm talking about rocks of the size you can carry with your hands, not bigger than that. I'm getting calluses on my hands and satisfaction from this kind of work."
Little rocks: you might consider a herb spiral (google search: http://www.mitra.biz/joomla/index.php/w ... herbspiral) It´s a 3-dimensional spiral where on top the conditions are more hot and dry and the lower you get the more colder and "wetter" it gets. This way you can grow very different herbs on one spot using the rocks you already have.
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LiquidSapphire
- Posts: 510
- Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 6:40 pm
Hi bigato -
Glad to hear that you are so much better off nowadays. Everything is looking up and going swell! Think of how far you've come... I remember when you used to walk around with a voice recorder in your pocket... I think of you every time I take mine out to record my conversations with my boss... hahaha
Glad to hear that you are so much better off nowadays. Everything is looking up and going swell! Think of how far you've come... I remember when you used to walk around with a voice recorder in your pocket... I think of you every time I take mine out to record my conversations with my boss... hahaha
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George the original one
- Posts: 5406
- Joined: Wed Jul 28, 2010 3:28 am
- Location: Wettest corner of Orygun