C40's Journal

Where are you and where are you going?
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Kriegsspiel
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Kriegsspiel » Sun Jul 01, 2018 7:22 am

Ben Leybovich on BiggerPockets had a couple articles about a "luxury house hack" in Phoenix, which was essentially him living in a house, and renting out an ADU out back, so I figure it's either zoning-compliant in at least some places, or it was at one point and you just have to keep an eye out for a property with one that's grandfathered in.

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Gilberto de Piento
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Gilberto de Piento » Sun Jul 01, 2018 10:06 am

The lover can be annoying when we’re not having sex, so I may look for a replacement.
Don't get trapped with someone you don't really want.

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bryan
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by bryan » Fri Jul 06, 2018 3:33 pm

C40, have you noticed any big changes to the vandwelling community (online?) in the past year? I'm not on Instagram so don't quite have the insight, but when talking with new folks recently (Bay Area) many are not as surprised as they used to be that I lived in a van for a spell and am planning to do it again soon. Also saw a lady's tweet going viral today that for some reason a lot of guys are driving vans these days.

Berkeley is thinking about segregating vandwellers to specific areas (and offering some van-dwelling specific space.. I think. They have already been pretty strict regarding needing residential permits to park on most streets).

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C40
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by C40 » Fri Jul 06, 2018 6:10 pm

@bryan: online, idk.. mainly there is more people/content. There are more people sharing. More 'fancy lifestyle' type content. A couple years ago, the popular van pictures were showing a woman lying stomach down on the bed in the van, looking out the open back doors, with her ass as a focal point. Now, more of the popular ones are of really clean and fancy eurovan coversions, with the people dressed like lifestyle models and the women in full makeup.

Out in the real world, way more people are aware of living in van as a lifestyle design and where I used to get a lot of "wait, what, you really live in a van??" I now get more "wow! that's my dream."

Two years ago, when someone initially said "that's my dream", when we had a conversation, they were going to ask me 20 questions about living and traveling in a van. I started avoiding those folks sometimes because I've had that conversation enough times. But now, when people say that, most of them aren't that interested in it and will only ask a couple questions about it. It's sort of a surface level awareness/interest because now so many more people are exposed to it.



@Kriegspiel - yeah, there are a handful of properties in Phoenix and Tucson with ADUs. (maybe 15 or so for sale when I checked). I spent a couple days looking at them online and running rental income numbers. It would work, but I'd likely have to spend at the very high end of what I'm willing to and capable of.
Last edited by C40 on Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

sky
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by sky » Fri Jul 06, 2018 7:23 pm

I get the feeling that vandwellers are getting treated more like homeless people. I see a lot more "No Overnight Parking" signs going up.

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Allagash
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Allagash » Fri Jul 06, 2018 7:50 pm

Great postin' there C40! Lucky mom to have a talented son.

RE is really hot all over the western USA right now and prices high in the good cities. Be interesting what you turn up. KS, OK as you mentioned... and many other midwest states I'm sure are radically cheaper and easier to buy then the west. I like the idea of a home base + a van for extended trips. I like having a base and some roots in a area personally, for many of the reasons you mentioned.

I share your dislike for Vegas, can't stand that place.

SavingWithBabies
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by SavingWithBabies » Fri Jul 06, 2018 8:12 pm

RE prices are up in the Midwest too. Starting to think whole country is up or at least any mildly liberal area.

Augustus
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Augustus » Fri Jul 06, 2018 11:39 pm

You're looking to build a "mother in law apartment", many places have friendly zoning for that. Multifamily zoning is harder to come by and more expensive from what I've seen. The legislation and restrictions vary by city/county/state and laws from all 3 apply, plus other laws/contracts I'm sure, such as hoa. IIRC doing an in law apartment is common and easy, but there are weird restrictions in some places, like having to actually be related.

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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Augustus » Sat Jul 07, 2018 2:41 pm

I've been having fun reading your journal. You mention many times that you are trying to figure out what to do next. From what I can tell, it seems like you have really only focused on one thing: comfort. You go different places, see different things, but you do not appear to have deviated from seeking comfort in these activities. I don't know that a house is going to be any different.

One interesting thing about parenting is how much discomfort and selflessness is required, and the effect it has on you. Counterintuitively, by not being able to fulfill myself the way I used to, I feel much more fulfilled. I'm not advocating that you go start a family, but I am pointing out that there is a kind of mental geography, and parenting takes you to new places in this mental geography. You sound kind of bored to be honest, you may want to look at avoiding comfort, and trying to travel to new headspaces, not necessarily physical ones.

In the same vein, there is a lot of programming built into us as a species, it executes only in certain scenarios. I've heard it said that hunting is a lot like that, it starts running some super ancient code that makes you feel very alive. Parenting is definitely the same, you just can't reach that headspace unless you parent. If you are bored, you will probably find more fulfillment by trying something truly new to you, not just variations of creature comforts.

Another common refrain seems to be the meaninglessness of it all. One interesting thing that happened to me post kid, is how meaningful certain things have become, because of their scarcity and their fragility. When you're suffering, and caring for someone who is suffering, and you're scared to death about them and their future and the uncertainties, well, it seems kind of silly to call things meaningless. Maybe suffering and selflessness is required to feel meaning? I don't know.

Oh, and last comment re: adu, a tiny home might bypass legislation entirely, esp if you can claim it isn't always there. I have land where that is the case, as long as I can claim I don't always park it there, it's not actually a dwelling, legally.

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daylen
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by daylen » Sat Jul 07, 2018 3:10 pm

Augustus wrote:
Sat Jul 07, 2018 2:41 pm
Maybe suffering and selflessness is required to feel meaning? I don't know.
I think meaning is more accurately derived from responsibility. Being responsible for something requires selflessness and suffering as a negative feedback to failure. There are plenty of things to be responsible for besides kids.

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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Augustus » Sat Jul 07, 2018 3:27 pm

Disagree, pain and suffering spotlights how valuable good things are. Loss, pain, etc are important for a proper valuation of life and the people and things in it. I am soooo much more compassionate and understanding of other people after parenting, I don't think a generic "responsibility" could possibly trigger that. My nerves are also much more raw, I feel other peoples pain much more powerfully, and am more able to overlook their shortcomings.

I stand by what I said, certain headspaces can only be traveled to by experiencing the things that trigger them. Often this will involve discomfort, pain, loss, etc.

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daylen
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by daylen » Sat Jul 07, 2018 3:43 pm

I don't disagree that suffering sorts values. I was just saying that responsibility is the underlying mechanism that induces suffering, so fundamentally meaning is derived from the responsibilities we adopt. This is just a thought I had; this thought is not disproved because some people have a preference for one responsibility over another.

Augustus
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Augustus » Sat Jul 07, 2018 3:59 pm

daylen wrote:
Sat Jul 07, 2018 3:43 pm
I have responsibility at work, all that does is make me dislike people. I've had friends, pets, property, charity, etc. All responsibility. None of them trigger what parenting triggers. I think you should be open to the idea that there are preprogrammed things inside of you that do not execute until they're triggered. There is a huge evolutionary incentive for these types of preprogramming.

If it weren't there you'd probably leave your child for dead at some point, because they are very inconvenient.

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daylen
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by daylen » Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:04 pm

Sure, I understand, but from my perspective it makes sense to think that parenting is only one of several triggers that can happen as humans develop.

Mister Imperceptible
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Mister Imperceptible » Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:17 pm

Regardless of the underlying psychology, I say again that C40 is at or near his peak level attractiveness to the opposite sex, and now would be a better time than ever to find a mate, and not just a lover. Unless he is able to find some other higher task to dedicate himself to. The other things- living in a van, homesteading, heading off to Southeast Asia- will not be so stimulating themselves in the long run, mostly because C40 is a highly competent human being, and can master them too easily. So either it will be a revolving door of novelty experiences, or the pursuit of a Great Task.

Wagner to Nietzsche: You must either be married, or write an opera.

Augustus
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Augustus » Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:24 pm

Mister Imperceptible wrote:
Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:17 pm
I think he's shooting blanks dude, so a mate is probably not feasible.

Mister Imperceptible
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Mister Imperceptible » Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:27 pm

C40 wrote:
Sat Feb 03, 2018 6:46 pm
Not the last I heard.

Augustus
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by Augustus » Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:34 pm

Touche

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C40
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by C40 » Sat Jul 07, 2018 5:17 pm

Augustus wrote:
Sat Jul 07, 2018 2:41 pm
From what I can tell, it seems like you have really only focused on one thing: comfort. You go different places, see different things, but you do not appear to have deviated from seeking comfort in these activities.
I'm not sure if you mean 'comfort' in a way other than I take it to mean,... of if I've not written clearly enough in my journal,.. or if you've misinterpreted what I write. Comfort is fairly low on my (unwritten) list of priorities. I think the way I write about myself can tend to be 'flat' in some ways and boring in some ways, and this may cause some misunderstandings.

A static home will be ergonomically more comfortable in a couple ways I'm looking forward to - being able to stand up inside, and having room for a more ergonomic chair.

I think I understand much of your post though, and it's the kind of thing I will be considering more before making any significant changes.

---------

As for kids, nope. These days I am up to 99% certainty that I don't want to have kids, and I'm also quite sure that won't change over time.

I'm still firing live rounds at the moment. I'll probably check on getting a vasectomy once I have residency and insurance established in a state that I actually live in. Right now, I'd have to either pay for the whole thing for sure, or go up to South Dakota for it. [ok well, I just looked up what they cost it seems like it's not (always) very expensive anyways: $350-$1000. So maybe I should just do it sooner rather than later]

I think it's possible for me - without having kids - to develop more of the kind of 'meaning' (than I currently have) that children often help drive - a connection to mankind/the world/the future. I think I'd have better results overall working on that more directly than finding very long-term mate, having the kids, and then raising/dealing with the kids, (and then pissibly dealing with splitting up from the mother, coparenting, etc.)

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BRUTE
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Re: C40's Journal

Post by BRUTE » Sat Jul 07, 2018 5:41 pm

why the vasectomy instead of just using condoms?

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