Momentos and sentimental items

[chenda]

I practice light minimalism, because I live in a small space and because I like the aesthetic. But I have small store full of crap I'm struggling to let go of. School textbooks, postcards (do people still send them ?) letters, diaries, playschool drawings, birthday cards etc etc. I'd like to at least consolidate it all down to one box of memories, but what you all do ? How much of your past do you physically preserve ? Or are you hard nosed about this and have long since chucked it all ?

[TheWanderingScholar]

Most of the sentimental things are pictures, which I can easaily digitze onto my phone. And memories.

Physically?

Articles of clothing which I enjoy using, and my backpack which I know have kept for half a decade now.

Beyond that, a lot of my souvenirs and the like I can keep in a little box.

[Jason]

You are at the fourth stage of Marie Kondo and although I haven't gotten there, it's obviously the most subjective. But when I do get there and mind you, I will get there, I'm pretty certain I will be heaving all of it away. I remember the feeling of emancipation when I threw away my HS yearbook. I generally give holiday cards a week on the piano and then they go. Generally speaking, I don't have many issues with this one.

[classical_Liberal]

...

[IlliniDave]

I've still got an amount of that stuff and don't think I'll ever shed all of it. Almost none of it is my stuff per se, rather it is stuff that has connection to other people. I'm not space constrained and finding room for a small box or two of old items isn't a big problem. If I was trying to curate my entire life it would be a different matter.

[TheWanderingScholar]

Sentimental items, for me anyway, are only sentimental because they invoke a memory. Memory of a great time in the past, loved ones, a childhood lived well, etc. I really don't need the item to keep the memory, I just need a way to stimulate the memory on occasion. Taking a picture of an item and seeing that photo does this for me.

I agree with you.

It is just the current items I have carry with them a history which I would like to continue.

Like the pot I have that I always bring with me when I move around.

[Bankai]

I 80/20'd mine twice - binned 80%, then digitalised 80% of the remaining 20% and only kept the rest (4%). But I'm not very sentimental - rarely even look at photos from holiday, so ymmv.

[Stahlmann]

Hijacking the topic:

I've got old (compared to me) collection of stamps from grandpa.

Of course, I don't trust people. How is price review conducted by Postal Officer or any other hobbyist? I don't have enough time to sit in his presence all day. I also worry that even if I made photos of the collecrion before visit, he would "trade" my XYZ rev00 stamp for his XYZ rev02 and I wouldn't be able to catch this.

[RFS]

My grandfather kept some neat letters from the early 20th century, and I'm glad he kept them. Each one is an interesting snapshot of his life at the time. I keep some letters for future grandkids that might be interested. And pictures.

I like to liberate myself from anything only seen and thought about while debating whether to throw it out. Free yourself from those textbooks! (unless you still get value from them.)

[jacob]

I outsource the physical preservation of my past as much as possible. My physics publications sit in various universities basements/libraries. While I keep the data/code for a while that period doesn't go beyond 10 years of data rot (essentially until I change computers and don't carry over my old data in any functional form). The ERE book sits on 15-20,000 bookshelves here and there. I still keep the raw source and the ability to recreate the files in case amazon goes all snafu (again!). However, this is a hassle, and I'd prefer not to.

(I suppose I consider such writings to be my footprint on the world. My purpose in this world...)

In terms of old photos... most of that is either on facebook or in the hands of other people, who care. I don't care insofar it falls into a black hole. I don't digitize, nor do I back up. If someone else wants to be the historian, I'll hand it over. If those pictures are lost, I won't cry.

I think the rest of my family is well aware that I have no intention of becoming the family-curator or that if any sentimental artifacts come under my control, they will be evaluated by present usefulness only. Like, this was your great-grandfather's straight-edge. Well, does it work/is it straight? If so, I keep it. If not, it goes. I think history will treat me/everyone the same. Now, I do take some pleasure in using a 100 year old rip-saw ... but only because it works and because people made better saws back then.

The older one gets, the more one has to carry around in order to "remember" everything.

Yet I don't care for this drag. I think that to a large extent, memories are like 'other people's children': nobody else really cares to hear about them...but you love and/to talk about them because they're your own.

[chenda]

Went though the store this afternoon and realised that whilst I'm not yet ready chuck it, if it all went up in smoke I'd quickly get over it. I think I'll forget about it until I'm ready for a purge...

The select stuff I do care about, photographs, diaries and old postcards, is actually well sorted, shelved and doesn't take up too much space. And the photographs are backed up by other family members albums. I do feel an obligation to preserve some of this for descendants.

@stahlmann - I also inherited a small stamp collection, mostly interwar stuff. Some interesting stamps from early Weimer Germany, hypa-inflation 2 million marks overprinted on 200 mark stamps. Though I guess they printed so many that philatelist collections are probably full of them. I've no idea where it came from because non of my relatives were German, but I think I'll sell it. Its probably worth speaking to a Chartered Surveyor who specialises in antiques for an independent valuation.

[prognastat]

My wife is by far the more sentimental of the two of us, but she has become more minimalist as time progressed. We still have a lot of stuff we probably should get rid of though so I'm probably the last to give advice on this, but Jacob has made some posts about determining which things you use and getting rid of the rest.

If you want the memories then photos, documents etc can be digitized and take up far less space that way. For physical items I really would switch more towards am I actually using it and if not then I should probably get rid of it.

[plow_2]

my kids art projects, crafts, etc get photographed and tossed.

[FBeyer]

As a general guide for sentimentals/collections/decoration etc:
1) If those things are SO important to you, why are they stowed away rather than displayed openly and proudly?
2) Do not consider what you could possibly do with them, but consider why you cannot live without them? (again, if you cannot live without X, why is X stowed away out of sight and out of mind?).

[prognastat]

As a general guide for sentimentals/collections/decoration etc:
1) If those things are SO important to you, why are they stowed away rather than displayed openly and proudly?
2) Do not consider what you could possibly do with them, but consider why you cannot live without them? (again, if you cannot live without X, why is X stowed away out of sight and out of mind?).

I can't say for sure as I don't really experience much of a drive to preserve mementos myself, but for my wife it seemed to be some kind of feeling of duty to preserve the items even if they have no use to herself and only take up space in storage.

[FBeyer]

Has she decluttered everything else? We all have our quirks. I have much less of an issue getting rid of mementos, but books have been the toughest by far. Math and programming books as well as a couple of board games are on the way out of my home right this moment. Everything else has been cut down to what I need, and want, but those things…

So whatever makes your wife tick is probably the hardest to deal with, and she 'needs' (that is, if she really truly wants to free herself from her own quirks) to train her ability to understand who she is, who she wants to be, and what physical possessions will help her get there. Anything, ANYTHING, that feels like an anchor, is; even if there are socially related emotions tied to that anchor. In other words: she needs to practice on all the less-important things first. She needs to distil herself from her stuff before she can finally engage in that last act of purging shit she doesn't want, nor need, because such a large part of her identity is tied up in it.


If she is a 'romantic' would she rather dream of old times, or would she rather be actively engaged in creating new good times? What helps her do that?

[prognastat]

I'm not completely sure, I think a big part of it for her was realising that we couldn't hold on to everything, because we simply didn't have the space for it and it unnecessarily complicated our lives. She still has the same tendency, but she has given up on keeping furniture that we don't use around because it has been in the family and has asked from her family to not give us a bunch of trinkets as gifts for birthdays/Christmas etc.