Man Who Chases 2 Rabbits Catches None

[slowtraveler]

I heard this quote years ago and it has helped me focus more efficiently.

I choose one area of life to focus on and act on other areas out of inspiration/momentum.

I've gotten wealth to a point I am very satisfied with. I do not have a job that is passionately inspiring but I have enough and am making solid progress towards ERE. I feel I can let momentum and the daily habit do the work here now though, saving more is something I'd love to also cultivate more.

I feel it's time to begin cultivating the next realm. Dating and my health are the obvious choices. I'm currently in an intermittent fast. I feel the desire to eat arise every few hours but it's very manageable. Doing 2 fasts per week got me to lose over 30 pounds. It's the only thing I found that worked for me to lose weight consistently over a long period of time. I want to make this my focus again until I have a 6 pack (probably another 30 pounds). It will help me feel more attractive to myself, move easier, save on food, and be more resilient health-wise.

I can let dating happen naturally and learn as I feel inspiration but if I focus on it actively, I tend to feel much more difficulty keeping my fasts going.

Has anyone had success in making multiple large lifestyle changes? Slow and steady is all that's worked for me.

[Solvent]

I prefer "If you only have one arse, you can't sit on two horses."
Apparently a Hungarian proverb, but you know how accurate quote attributions are...

I too tend to make changes gradually. I think perhaps the only time I consciously made a large switch in direction was on changing my course of university study. This was after already sinking two years into a degree, so it was massively hard to, effectively, start anew from scratch. It was probably for the best though, certainly from a financial/job security point of view.

Nevertheless, I don't think concentrating on a single goal across every life domain is a good idea. How to explain this... in fitness, don't focus on making hypertrophy and endurance gains together, right? At a certain point they work against each other. But there's little reason to not pursue dating expertise and professional goals together.

This is probably one of the bits of the ERE book I recall best, the part about heterotelic/homeotelic goals. You can pursue multiple if they sufficiently line up.

In the end, I suppose, this still eventually breaks down in the face of the absolutely limited attention/time resource. But I can't fathom spending absolutely 100% of my attention on just one goal, I would burn out.

[slowtraveler]

I don't mean devoting 100% of my attention to a goal, more like directing 90% of my energy that's focused on changing my direction. Not trying to change too many things at once but still letting myself keep the monthly progress towards FI, seeing the world, etc.

Stopping working or dating completely would seem foolish but I can let them develop as they develop without stressing about them and focus my conscious effort on integrating 2 fasts per week at this moment.

I actually only made it to 20 hours, still good for my first fast in a month. Going for 24 hours, likely on Sunday.

Until then, I'll keep working, dating, reading, may even hit the gym if the inspiration strikes, but not pressuring myself to change in those areas. Letting them keep their momentum while putting my mind towards steering my body to consume its fat.

[7Wannabe5]

If working, dating, reading, exercising, and fasting are the challenge realms, it seems like my complementary goals would be different from yours. I am generally too vain to date when I feel like I am too fat, so the desire to date is positive impetus to weight loss up to a point. Kind of like scheduling weekly dinner parties to motivate house cleaning. That said, I would say that level of challenge for fasting would be WAAAAY higher than level of challenge for dating.

Unfortunately, I have often found that serious reading and serious exercising are hard to simultaneously co-ordinate in my lifestyle, unless I can also include a nap in my schedule, but then I don't have enough time to work. I think this is because I am mildly cyclothymic, so being physically hyper makes me too mentally hyper to concentrate.

[slowtraveler]

I've been resting on this topic and realized that fasting is a heterotilic goal- it progresses my health in many ways (hormone regulation, fat loss, increased cellular regeneration, increase lifespan, etc.), my wealth (less food consumed in a week, lower health expenses), and my relationships (less chance being sick, nicer body, feel better on non-fasting days).

What are some other heterotilic goals?

The ones I've thought of are:
Cooking (healthier foods, less financial costs, fun to do with others)
Outdoor gym workouts (free except transport, improved skeletomuscular health, improved physique increases halo effect as shoulder to waist ratio moves towards fibonacci ratio)
Walking (improves cardiovascular, neurological, lymphatic, and skeletomuscular health, can find good deals, learn about area for more fun plans)
Minimalism (Less mental stress, less costs if decluttering instead of buying fancy gear, less back pain since not walking with backpack most of the time)
Meditating (Less mental stress, free, more present and calm so better with people, better at focus and delaying gratification)
Drinking only water (Less sugars, less cost)
Cutting own hair (less financial costs, more time)

I'm currently 10 hours into a fast going for 22ish hours.

After I have fasts down well, I'll start doing the outdoor gym workouts on non-fasting days. Pull ups, dips, and inverted rows with water bottles for weights; push ups, squats, and pelvic thrusts with girl for weight.

[BRUTE]

go fasting
brute has only had 2 meals so far this week.

[2Birds1Stone]

I would like to try intermittent fasting again.

I struggle with it because I train for mid/long distance triathlon as well as weight lifting, and I'm not sure how to time the meals around training since I can be training any time of the day so it's harder to say I'll fast from wake up till 6 PM and give myself a 4-5 hour feeding window consistently.

My experience has been that focusing on one area has produced the most dramatic results, which in turn inspired me in other areas of life.

Example - I was 300lbs and smoked a pack of cigarettes a day in 2007. I had a deep depression and hit a low point which caused me to reevaluate my life. Over the next two years I focused on my health/weight and quit smoking while dropping 120lbs. In the interim I got involved with coaching others, got a job that was based on my new found appreciation for health and wellness, and ended up meeting my SO in the process. The maniacal focus to not be obese taught me that with some discipline and a good plan, you can achieve things that seem insurmountable.

A similar experience focusing on producing at work (I'm in sales) had led me to great networking opportunities, accelerated my path to fire, and opened other career doors which were previously not possible (I have no degree).

[Jason]

I have heard this quote before but had forgotten about it. It's annoyingly profound. Like climbing a mountain to get pearls of wisdom only to find that the person on the peak is at once enlightened and a complete fucking asshole. You don't know whether to bow to their wisdom or kick their ass to the bottom.

For me, the hard part is determining what you call a rabbit. Is it a goal, a vision? Do you become monomaniacally focused on something? I have no idea but it causes me so much distress that I'd probably end up chasing both rabbits in order that I can smash their cute little rabbit heads together and get back to unapologetically doing stupid shit in a haphazard manner.