The Extrovert Expense

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The Extrovert Expense

Post by SustainableHappiness » Mon Sep 18, 2017 9:46 am

Is a consequence of a highly consumerist society that a tendency toward extroversion will lead to higher expenses than introversion?

I am well aware that these expenses can be reduced through effort and building better systems; my personal favourite is creating a dinner party circuit with friends within the same city and striving to make the most efficiently delicious meal possible for everyone (chili and home made cider anyone??). But I am not asking for tips and tricks. I am curious how this forum feels about the idea that an ERE extrovert will likely spend more on social activities than and ERE introvert all else being equal.

Is this an excuse given by an extrovert (me)? Is it a valid conclusion?

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by jacob » Mon Sep 18, 2017 10:48 am

I don't recall ever having seen anyone complain about the introvert "need to spend" more money on books, craft supplies or extra cats 8-)

So I usually file [the extrovert "need to spend" to go out] under complainypant objections ;-) ... but it is kinda common.

But, sure, different priorities means different spending patterns.

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by Fish » Mon Sep 18, 2017 12:04 pm

Here's a really good post by @ebast on the benefits of coffee and pints: ... 41#p138241

If expenses are a concern you might not be weighting the higher order benefits enough, or could be socializing with with people whose interests/activities/waste streams are completely unaligned with your web of goals.

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by GandK » Mon Sep 18, 2017 6:09 pm

My husband would have agreed with you a couple of years ago. He has since put time and effort into figuring out cool low-cost or free things that he can invite other people to, that they will likely say yes to. Apparently most folks go to bars, not because they love bars, but because they don't know what else to do to meet up with people. G eventually worked out that if he's extroverted enough to seek others out socially, he's extroverted enough to suggest the entertainment too. And today he spends a lot less.

Current examples: September in Cincinnati = the biggest Oktoberfest celebrations in the US. Free samples and German-American entertainment abound. Corn mazes are ubiquitous right now too in the midwest. Multiple parks in this area have free movies or amateur theater on weekends that are picnic and BYOB. He plays in an amateur Euchre league on Monday nights (he's there right now). He bikes with friends on the local Rails to Trails. Redbox or binge-watching Netflix in a buddy's home is apparently just as socially fulfilling as going to the movies (? why are they talking during a movie anyway? #thingsicantparse). Right now it's football season and he's a Dallas fan... etc. There are a TON of things to do that are inexpensive.

I'd say by all means spend money socially if it brings you happiness. Spending isn't a sin. But if it doesn't bring happiness, your problem isn't your friends or social habits or "being an extrovert," it's a crisis of imagination. I think if you put together a list of options you know you'll love and suggest one, you'll have better results.

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by Tyler9000 » Tue Sep 19, 2017 12:22 am

Yeah, I personally think extroversion and expenses are on different vectors. Maybe they're not completely orthogonal, but you definitely can't directly correlate spending habits to personality. For every outgoing person spending a lot of money on a social scene there's a gregarious beach bum spending almost nothing. And for every introverted person saving money by not going out there's another spending huge amounts on hobbies.

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by slowtraveler » Tue Sep 19, 2017 1:26 am

+1 Tyler

Ie-Couch surfing and hostels are among the cheapest ways to sleep in cities under a roof and are very social.

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by Laura Ingalls » Tue Sep 19, 2017 7:56 am

I have found both pre and post-FI that paid employment has helped helps to meet my social needs.

I always found it interesting when I had preschool aged children how many families had a stay at home parent and then paid big bucks for preschool (which seemed to be as much about respite for the SAHP than development of the preschool aged kiddo). I went to work part time kids and I both had social experiences and they paid me too :lol:

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by Ego » Tue Sep 19, 2017 2:02 pm

I see the ability to be extroverted as a skill. Like any other skill, it can be used in a wide variety of ways to save and earn money. If someone lacks the ability to be outgoing or struggles to direct their attention to things other than themselves, they may struggle to get things done with others.

Same goes for the ability to be introverted. If someone lacks the ability to be reserved or to do things alone, they may struggle with solitary pursuits.

Both are skills that can be learned.

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Tue Sep 19, 2017 3:58 pm

I agree with Ego. Here is a classic video exhibiting the transformation of skills and personal assets acquired in the realm of solitary labor being transformed into socially acceptable tender within the context of community-level production event: ... _T&index=6

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Re: The Extrovert Expense

Post by SustainableHappiness » Tue Sep 19, 2017 7:40 pm

Oh bollox (sp?), seems like the unique little snowflake portion of my mind was busy making up excuses for expense categories I am insecure about because I agree with everything said even though I don't have an issue with these expenses as mentioned in the OP.

Friggin' sweet post on coffee and pints. Although the comment on "my friends don't align with my web of goals" although it maaaaaaay be true for a few friends, makes me quite queezy in the sense of treating friends as means not ends, the latter of which is what I try to do at all times a la Kant. Not saying its not a consideration, but our long term friends are long term for a reason and we're adult enough to drop the dead weight with ease.
jacob wrote:
Mon Sep 18, 2017 10:48 am
I don't recall ever having seen anyone complain about the introvert "need to spend" more money on books, craft supplies or extra cats 8-)
My first reaction was "but it's easy to do those things cheaper", then I gave that about 30 seconds more thought and said "Fuck" and wished I hadn't written the thread.

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