,,Grasp all, lose all"

[Mister Imperceptible]

I was somewhere in the FQ hitting a doobie behind a statue on a mild April Sunday afternoon and everyone was out and having a good time. A trumpet playing set a great vibe. I found the player, a scraggly disheveled white dude in a torn T-shirt with an open case with a few one dollar bills and coins inside. He was taking a break and when I kicked in a twenty he exclaimed a doped up “THANKS!” and started an ecstatic riff. Then I ate beignets.

[Alphaville]

To me it's more like I'm playing theatre. You go through a role-script and you don't even know why you're doing it. In the end, all it feels like is exhausting.

On the other hand, not doing it results in social rejection and being looked down on.

this is why it’s important to pick good/suitable roles to play. if your role is a good match for your personality you can do great.

there was a short story by jack vance about a civilization/planet where everyone wears masks. does anyone know where to find it? hahaha. jack vance is hard to find sometimes which reminds me to check out the library...

[Jin+Guice]

I mean, the stuff you said you love is a pretty great description of New Orleans. The only two bad things I can see you not liking about it are that it's a little bit cheesy in a "N'awlins y'all" kind of way and it's pretty segregated. It's a pretty small city without the tourists and tourism is the main industry. Honestly, you'll have a better time if you lean into the tourist shit a little and don't try to find the "real New Orleans." With the exception of a few tourist traps, pretty much everything except for Bourbon Street and the casino will have some locals. The segregation is mostly cultural/ institutional (on a heat map there are a lot of mixed neighborhoods) and I think it's largely a result of poor opportunities and education in poorer neighborhoods, which are overwhelmingly black within the city limits.

I don't want to poison the well:

things i love: food. i can be a massive glutton when unleashed. i dream of muffulettas, crawfish, yaka mein, hole in the wall places with great stuff. delicious but not pricey stuff. i guess more than “food” i love food culture, by which i mean: people who really care about what they’re going to be eating later. not frontin, not signaling, not being pretentious, but really into the big dopamine rush of a tasty bite.

another: live music, jazz, from traditional to experimental. second lines. longhair. drinking in public. the fat sound of a trombone. strange things i haven’t even heard before too, i do have a taste for unlistenable frequencies and chaos. good percussion to. nothing country though, lol (no offense to anyone just not my thing).

walkable cities & neighborhoods, catching a cab at 4 am, or better yet: places that never close and you eat a tasty fish soup for breakfast after a long night out

100% of that exists in New Orleans and is not hard to find.

I lived in NYC too and I'd say New Orleans is at least as much outside of U.S. culture as New York is... It's also sort of cool in the opposite way from NYC. To bring it back to this thread, sometimes I think I might have trouble relating to the conservative culture people, because occasionally I walk outside on a Tuesday morning and there is a 6'3" craggly man in his 50s with light blue hair wearing a hot pink dress and heals pulling a bright red wagon with a speaker that's blasting "Formation" and no one bats an eye.

[2Birds1Stone]

100% of that exists in New Orleans and is not hard to find.

I lived in NYC too and I'd say New Orleans is at least as much outside of U.S. culture as New York is... It's also sort of cool in the opposite way from NYC. To bring it back to this thread, sometimes I think I might have trouble relating to the conservative culture people, because occasionally I walk outside on a Tuesday morning and there is a 6'3" craggly man in his 50s with light blue hair wearing a hot pink dress and heals pulling a bright red wagon with a speaker that's blasting "Formation" and no one bats an eye.

So it's settled then. When we drive down to FL in the fall/winter we have to spend a few days in the Big Easy. I'll hit you up by PM with dates when we get closer.

[Alphaville]

The only two bad things I can see you not liking about it are that it's a little bit cheesy in a "N'awlins y'all" kind of way and it's pretty segregated.
[...]
I think I might have trouble relating to the conservative culture people, because occasionally I walk outside on a Tuesday morning and there is a 6'3" craggly man in his 50s with light blue hair wearing a hot pink dress and heals pulling a bright red wagon with a speaker that's blasting "Formation" and no one bats an eye.

haaahaaaahaa that is a great image. would love to see that.

a bit worried about the segregation bit, yeah. you mean you have to hang out with white people or brown people but not both? how does it work?

i guess i tend to think of new orleans as bigger than it is and not sure why. once the richest port in north america, beaten by the erie canal & new york... but the culture is massive, i feel.

so what areas are more, hm, what’s the word... boho, maybe? please point me to those heat maps, hahaha.

and i hear you about leaning into the touristy bit some—we sometimes catch a webcam that’s on bourbon street and it’s often hilarious.

[Alphaville]

anyway, sorry for the derail, i have not forgotten, so my questions for the man of steel, before attempting to venture any suggestion:

@stahlmann:

-how different are you from the normies?
-where do you spend your days & nights? (what setting, what people)
-in what areas are you experiencing most difficulties?

(i might have more questions after replies)

[7Wannabe5]

6'3" craggly man in his 50s with light blue hair wearing a hot pink dress and heals pulling a bright red wagon with a speaker that's blasting "Formation" and no one bats an eye.

Now giving some consideration to the Venn Diagram overlap between New Orleans and My Sex Life.

things i love: food. i can be a massive glutton when unleashed. i dream of muffulettas, crawfish, yaka mein, hole in the wall places with great stuff. delicious but not pricey stuff. i guess more than “food” i love food culture, by which i mean: people who really care about what they’re going to be eating later. not frontin, not signaling, not being pretentious, but really into the big dopamine rush of a tasty bite.

Yeah, you can put me in the self-aware sensualist camp too. One time when I was between partners, I was by myself in a restaurant renowned for dim sum. Another solo diner, a craggly man in his 50s with an attractive boy-band like fringe of salt and pepper hair and mussed,muscular version academic tweed style, was absolutely devouring his way through his meal with obvious great relish, giving me reason to feel regret about my lack of skillz in making first approach.

[7Wannabe5]

Yes, Ne is essentially brainstorming [externally]. Coming up with hypotheses and seeing where they end up, while also being able to backtrack and start over from a previous position (Si). Ni, in contrast, starts with the end point and [internally] simulates many possible paths to that end. This allows Ni to anticipate how things will probably end up by attending to the current moving pieces (Se).

Exactly, the way I visualize it is that I am like a little terrier dog, quickly running off on looped explorations, but then usually returning to the main path. Expanding the map is more core than achieving the goal. I would add that it has been my observation that XSTJ differs from XNTJ in that the "march to the sea" is broken up into series of shorter vectors. I think the primary difference between INTP and ENTP might be that ENTP likes to gather up 100 jigsaw map puzzle pieces before working at putting any more in place, because hoping that some will just auto-magically click into place.

BTW: I am now reading Buckminster Fuller, and I think you might very much enjoy.

[Alphaville]

Now giving some consideration to the Venn Diagram overlap between New Orleans and My Sex Life.

hahaha ha! maybe you need relocation instead of testogel.

Yeah, you can put me in the self-aware sensualist camp too.
[...]
giving me reason to feel regret about my lack of skillz in making first approach.

used to be the missed connections section of the personals was about that sort of thing. i have no idea what people would do for this today.

Exactly, the way I visualize it is that I am like a little terrier dog, quickly running off on looped explorations, but then usually returning to the main path. Expanding the map is more core than achieving the goal. I would add that it has been my observation that XSTJ differs from XNTJ in that the "march to the sea" is broken up into series of shorter vectors. I think the primary difference between INTP and ENTP might be that ENTP likes to gather up 100 jigsaw map puzzle pieces before working at putting any more in place, because hoping that some will just auto-magically click into place.

you guys are forgetting P vs J. P is not in any hurry to make big pronouncements and prefers to keep working on a better map of ever-shifting continents. i mean, forget about the map even, let’s work on better instruments. J wants a fixed map and to stick to it: version 2 due maybe in 5 years?

but the universe is in a constant flux from where i see it, and heraclitus was right.

ok i’ve discussed enough astrology for today

[7Wannabe5]

@Alphaville:

I thought P vs J was what I was writing about. I am eNTP and my family of origin was composed of primarily Ps (at one point our family motto was declared to be “Hang Loose”, so I still often have trouble grokking J functioning, especially E-J. As in, “Why are you telling me what to do, don’t you know that I was granted more autonomy at age 8 than you are allowing for in this relationship?” Maddening.

[daylen]

J vs. P within the system being used here (socionics is different) just indicates whether the first extroverted function is judging or perceiving.

J: Te or Fe in first two slots
P: Ne or Se in first two slots

Extroverted functions operate on shorter time-cycles (i.e. they are quick relative to their introverted variants)(*). J's make rapid decisions, and P's make rapid observations/inferences. Another way to think about it is that the extroverted functions favor simple heuristics/tactics that can be iterated and chained together.

I would say that INTJ's are more likely to see the universe as being in constant flux than INTP's are. Although INTP's may present themselves as being more open, the primary lens of INTJ's actually is most of the time. Especially considering that N is connotative and T is denotative.

So, generally I would say that IxxP's are more stubborn than IxxJ's but not as demanding of others.

(*) This is just how it appears from an external point of view. Functions operating externally receive more external feedback.

[Jin+Guice]

So it's settled then. When we drive down to FL in the fall/winter we have to spend a few days in the Big Easy. I'll hit you up by PM with dates when we get closer.

Tight! Give me as much of a heads up as y'all can. Looking forward to it!

a bit worried about the segregation bit, yeah. you mean you have to hang out with white people or brown people but not both? how does it work?

It's more like there are two separate cities, one that is largely black and the other that is largely white. I'm sure there are some exceptions to this, but in general, no one will care (and it would not be acceptable to care) if people of color come to a mostly white event. So it's more institutional/ the way things developed, no one is enforcing it and you will certainly encounter people of all races together on the street. Most events tend to be largely made up of one race or the other, but there are plenty of exceptions. I play in several multiracial bands and no one has ever said anything to us (we've played a few large weddings with no black guests, which is weird, but no personal problems reported from the black band members). Music and mardi gras stuff are probably the most integrated events.

[Alphaville]

It's more like there are two separate cities, one that is largely black and the other that is largely white.

daaaaaaaaaang... that makes me sad a little.

i sort of grew up in dc, and while there were something like magnetic poles in the city (e.g., foxhall on one end, anacostia on the other) there was a lot in between: a large black middle class that straddled the divide, and prosperous black businesses and black millionaires and political stars, a massive international contingent with everything from diplomats to war refugees to tech workers on h1b1 visas, korean grocers, rural west virginians trying to make it in the city, a jazz scene, a punk/indie scene, an opera scene, go-go clubs, a small chinatown with burmese restaurants, etc. etc.

it’s a very square, very buttoned up town, but it was also pretty integrated for america. that has changed a lot this century with massive gentrification, but i had some good times there while it lasted. and it’s still making me proud in the news, lately.

so—is there a cool black neighborhood you’d recommend for staying, and walkable food, music, second lines, that sort of thing?

[Jin+Guice]

@alphaville:

It is kind of sad. I think a lot of it a lack of opportunities for poor black people from Louisiana. If you grow up poor and black in New Orleans, you're essentially from a different country. IME, areas where this is true for black folks exist in every city, but in New Orleans there are less wealthy and middle class people of color, so the segregation stands out more. I'm not saying there is no direct racism at play, but I don't think the direct racism is worse than any other American city and I think it's better than most cities in the South.

so—is there a cool black neighborhood you’d recommend for staying, and walkable food, music, second lines, that sort of thing?

This actually presents an interesting conundrum which highlights the problem. A "black" neighborhood here is synonymous with really poor, so there's not a lot of stuff to do there. The corner store po' boy game will be off the charts, and if you can get invited to a bbq or something, that will be dope, but there will be much less stuff to go to. I'm not sure if you're white or not (I am white), but if you are, it's not the best move to go to all black stuff here. I've never heard of any actual problems, but unless you have a pretty explicit reason for being there, it just ends up feeling like you're invading an all black space. There also won't be any hotels in those neighborhoods (exception is Tulane avenue, which has started gentrifying, but used to be all rent by the hour prostitute/ crack motels), so you're looking at air bnbs, which are def serving to gentrify those neighborhoods (I'm not going to judge you if you still want to stay there, just letting you know).

Treme is one of the most mixed neighborhoods, and it's my personal recommendation. It's directly above the FQ and is walking/ biking distance to the most stuff and it has its own cool stuff. You could also look at the 7th Ward, which is also pretty mixed (look for stuff near St. Bernard Avenue. The farther from the river you are the poorer the area is and the more dangerous the neighborhood is. New Orleans is fucking dangerous, so I wouldn't recommend going much above Claiborne unless you are very confident in your ability to navigate high crime areas). Also don't discount the FQ/ CBD. They are the most centrally located parts of the city with the most stuff to do and walkable to the most other stuff to do. They are a bit touristy and they will be a little bit more expensive, but there are still deals available and you'll be right in the middle of the action.

It's sort of comically hard to avoid second lines/ parades here. One time I was biking to a wedding gig (that had a second line) and I literally got stuck behind different second lines on 6 consecutive streets. #NewOrleansProblems

[Alphaville]

#NewOrleansProblems

haaahaaahaaaaaaaa

yeah, wife and i were looking at the police permits for second lines some time ago haahaahaaaa. pretty cool to have cops specialize in such an institution.

thanks SO much for the detailed explanations, i really appreciate them.

i’m a multiracial mongrel that could look different “races” depending on who’s looking and what time of the day or nigh it is, hahahaaha. i used to live in barely-gentrified neighborhoods in dc, sort of “i lived there when there were crackhouses” sort of thing, but i lived next to black doctors and journalists and white hippies and government workers and all sorts of people really, e.g, my black landlord had a white boyfriend, perfect fit for the neighborhood. it was a great time, cheap rent, walkable to a lot of places. now my old haunts are buried under luxury condos and starbucks pepper every corner—feels alien to me. my wife is brown but not black, and when she stayed in new york she loved to hang out in harlem, as she stayed nearby in morningside heights.

but then again— we don’t wanna feel like trespassers, yeah.

i will look into tremé, sounds like we’d enjoy it. loved the show! hahaha. and i’ll research what you mentioned. thank you again so much. maybe we’ll meet some day!