C40 & 7W, Relationship Book suggestions?

[theanimal]

Perused through Men from Mars, Women are from Venus today. C40 is right. Chapter 2 is all you need to read. You Just Don't Understand Me has similar points but seems to have more depth. I started that one today.

+1 to Nonviolent Communication. Some of it felt very cheesy but I think the underlying principles are valuable. It changed the way I talk to others when seeking something. I'm still working on the active listening part.

One book I forgot about is Impro by Keith Johnstone. That is probably the best book I read for social dynamics and improving conversation with others. I couldn't recommend it more highly.

[Jin+Guice]

I'd like to expand this thread by asking for book suggestions about socialization and communication in general. I'm trying to improve in this area. I think this could include books explicitly about these topics, relationships, PUA stuff, sales, negotiation, etc...

I'm specifically trying to get better at talking to strangers, negotiating business stuff, communicating needs and wants effectively in relationship and business contexts, telling people things I know they don't want to hear, putting people at ease when I meet them, reading social situations, signalling effectively and picking up chicks. I'm probably game to try any real life experiments/ tactics that anyone has used in any of these realms and am also interested in reading any helpful books/ blogs/ articles on these topics.

[Kriegsspiel]

Buying Styles by Michael Wilkinson is kind of like a Five Love Languages for business negotiating.

[platypus]

Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Dr. Robert Cialdini is really excellent. It's not necessarily about dating, but the information is relevant. It teaches how to sell, and the initial stages of dating are all about selling yourself.

I ought to give the caveat that although I've dated a lot of people, I've never had a healthy romantic relationship. For that, you've also got to choose the right customer.

Anna Karenina by tolstoï is a great book too.

What did you learn about dating from Anna Karenina?

I mean, an obvious moral would be "adultery will screw up your life and your family's," but I'm guessing you got more out of it.

[Clarice]

Well, the gentlemen who are concerned about getting into relationship may want to look into The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene.

[Jin+Guice]

I recently read Slutever by Karley Sciortino. She runs a blog by the same name and writes a relationships column for Vogue and after a cursory reading of her blog and column it looks like this is a best of the blog tied into a cohesive narrative style book. I really enjoyed the book and found it a useful resource as both an alternative lifestyle and alternative relationship read. The book is much more pop/ easy-read and autobiographical book than a serious self-help or serious alternative framework book, but this is one of the things I enjoyed about it. I also enjoyed her discussion of some of the more negative aspects of open and alternative relationships as opposed to a we-should-all-just-get-along-because-this-is-easy-and-fine/ compersion 4ever sales pitch.

I'm also reading a book about negotiation called Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on it by Chris Voss. This is an excellent book on negotiation, but I think it has a lot of crossover into relationship issues.

[snow_leopard]

Check out the podcast Ther-A-Friends. It was created by two therapists with a lot of education and experience who are also friends (and are also women). They cover a wide variety of topics on how to navigate issues in friendships, and these are a lot of the same issues that romantic relationships have to tackle.

Most therapy and relationship advice is aimed at family or romantic relationships and issues, but friendships are just as important. If you can be a good friend, you have better luck at attracting and maintaining a quality relationship with a partner or woman.

[fiby41]

Kāmasūtra
The Art of Seduction

Anna Karenina by tolstoï is a great book too.

Thanks for putting it on my reading list.

[fiby41]

The Rational Male