Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

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7Wannabe5
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 11:46 am

RFS wrote:I know very little about anything, but I do know this: that if you can live your life without an audience, you should do it."
"First let's go see a football game. A professional football game," Frances said, because she knew Michael loved to watch them. "The Giants are playing. And it'll be nice to be outside all day today and get hungry and later we'll go down to Cavanagh's and get a steak as big as a blacksmith's apron, with a bottle of wine, and after that, there's a new French picture at the Filmarte that everybody says... Say, are you listening to me?"

"Sure," he said. He took his eyes off the hatless girl with the dark hair, cut dancer-style, like a helmet, who was walking past him with the self-conscious strength and grace dancers have. She was walking without a coat and she looked very solid and strong and her belly was flat, like a boy's, under her skirt, and her hips swung boldly because she was a dancer and also because she knew Michael was looking at her. She smiled a little to herself as she went past and Michael noticed all these things before he looked back at his wife. "Sure," he said, "we're going to watch the Giants and we're going to eat steak and we're going to see a French picture. How do you like that?"
-"The Girls in Their Summer Dresses"- Irwin Shaw (1939)
The internet is the city.

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TopHatFox
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Re: Eliminating Facebook (and all social media) from our lives?

Post by TopHatFox » Mon Dec 17, 2018 10:15 pm

Try this on for size, social media as a pathology creator:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&v=dmXcjvL9VSc

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TopHatFox
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Re: Eliminating Facebook (and all social media) from our lives?

Post by TopHatFox » Tue Dec 18, 2018 7:27 am

From the video, there are a slew of studies concluding that social media increases mental health maladies like suicide, narcissism, anxiety, depression, and more, and is best avoided completely.

The follow-up point is that the large influx of anti-social behavior IRL over the past decade is as a direct result of 2 billion people using it. The speaker makes the case that there is a massive chasm between those that regularly use SM and those that don't at all.

He finally suggests to seek out enclaves of people that are in the no-use camp. Some of those groups included people in theater, academia, and a few others.

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vexed87
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by vexed87 » Tue Dec 18, 2018 7:56 am

I have been Facebook free for a year (deleted my account) after being inactive for a year prior to that. I've noticed no significant detrimental effects on my social life. I occasionally miss out on inane group chatter and meme sharing on the 'messenger' app, but keep abreast of the more serious discussion during social gatherings with those same friends regardless.

There was a time when my friends were not used to my absence, and forgot to extend me invites to gatherings, though they quickly got better at pinging me a text/calling instead. I much prefer that. I did try to get my small group to switch over to Whatsapp or Signal, but there were a couple of stubborn participants who refuse to leave Facebook and try something new, it never took off, I cope OK without it.

Pros:
I have noticed much reduced desire interact with my smart phone, part of that resulted from a decision to mute most notifications, I only get text or call alerts. That goes a long way to reduce unwanted or irritating distractions or late night awakenings, technically not FB related, but push notifications are evil :twisted: :roll: and getting rid of FB was an important step in getting there, as there was no longer a need to be hooked into the news feed.
No more participating in echo chambers or witnessing politically polarising topics and idiotic debates between past acquaintances.
No adverts or temptation to engage hedonistic activity for the sake of it.
No one has access to a trove of data and photos of my misspent youth.
No more third party profiling/harvesting.

Cons:
No doubt I have now completely lost touch with some distant family and old friends, however those were nothing more than superficial interactions anyway. I don't think that will bother me much on my death bed. Those that still want to make contact can, by other means.
I can no longer follow people or groups that have interesting or meaningful discussions and interactions on the platform.
Lots of photographs are no longer backed up in the cloud (if they did get lost, I wouldn't really miss them anyway).

I recently also deleted my twitter account. Though I didn't use that to interact with friends, I did use it to follow a few interesting people. Instead I'll be doing that only with plain old bookmarks to reduce the effectiveness of cookie tracking/profiling.

jacob
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by jacob » Tue Dec 18, 2018 8:09 am

I just managed to log into twitter again after several years. Apparently I now have 6000 followers although I'm not sure what exactly they're following :lol:

As for facebook, I'm on again after a ~6 month hiatus. Pro-tip: The "snooze" function is very underrated.

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cmonkey
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by cmonkey » Tue Dec 18, 2018 9:11 am

The best time to not have a FB account is from the very beginning. ;) DW has one but never updates it, just stays up to date on old friends and distant family.

Skype is much better for keeping in touch with family.

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theanimal
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by theanimal » Tue Dec 18, 2018 9:55 am

I use Facebook mainly for the messenger feature. Often times I'm in areas with no cell service and it allows me to stay in contact with family and friends. More people, including myself, are willing to use messenger rather than email or some other equivalent. The conversations one has on there are ones choosing as well, oftentimes conversations can become quite nuanced and avoid superficialiaties.

I love twitter. A well curated twitter account is an aggregator for resources that challenge you and help you grow. I experience almost no negativity from that site.

Smashter
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by Smashter » Wed Dec 19, 2018 11:22 am

theanimal wrote:
Tue Dec 18, 2018 9:55 am
I love twitter.
Me too, and for the same reasons. But still, if I'm being honest, I use it more for procrastination than for personal development. Sometimes I just scroll and scroll, nodding along to the wonderful things other people are saying but not really digesting anything, let alone engaging with anything.

Do you get caught in that loop? Do you try to fight it?

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TopHatFox
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by TopHatFox » Wed Dec 19, 2018 11:36 am

Did any of you watch the video? lol

daylen
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by daylen » Wed Dec 19, 2018 11:55 am

I am watching now. Very interesting!

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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by daylen » Wed Dec 19, 2018 2:22 pm

That video connected many thoughts I had previously on this subject. Glad I ditched non-curated digital networks after high school. :shock:

I had not considered the distinction between addition and conditioning much before he elaborated on it. Addition has an embedded goal (e.g. to get high), and conditioning is simple and avoids complexity. Social networks are conditioning people towards anti-social behaviors. Social media is an epidemic that conditions a fear of love. A significant proportion of the youth are replacing reality with a simulation that incentivizes hate, and this is a type of business where the customers are also the employers; every user is simultaneously a content creator and promoter.

This situation is analogous to viral epidemics except for the fact that it is not limited to any geographic area, socioeconomic class, or age group. The older population has more experience with real interaction in the real world so they are less susceptible. He estimated that at least 2 billion people are infected worldwide.

Another interesting note is that viruses do not to spread to the whole population, because this would ensure their own demise. Hence, the human population is being split, quite sharply, between two groups.. those who use social media and those who do not.

Love/intimacy is the only antidote.

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theanimal
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by theanimal » Wed Dec 19, 2018 3:32 pm

Smashter wrote:
Wed Dec 19, 2018 11:22 am
Me too, and for the same reasons. But still, if I'm being honest, I use it more for procrastination than for personal development. Sometimes I just scroll and scroll, nodding along to the wonderful things other people are saying but not really digesting anything, let alone engaging with anything.

Do you get caught in that loop? Do you try to fight it?
Yes. I think I convince myself that it provides more value than it actually does. I do believe it provides value. I'm just not sure how much. There is a bit of FOMO involved in thinking that there will eventually be some great insight that makes a significant impact. But the reality is that those are few and far between. I have been trying to think of what the ratio is of impactful tweets to noise and how that compares to great books vs. mediocre books (most books). The book ratio is pretty low. Twitter depends on who you follow, but I don't think it approaches that of books.

I find that I feel best about my internet usage when I follow a warrior diet approach. Fasting from media consumption throughout the day (I allow myself to read longer saved articles and use FB messenger) and then consuming to my heart's content later at night, ideally after 6 pm. I find that if I wait throughout the day, I end up wanting to be on the computer a lot less. I still want to check stuff, but after going through it, I realize I didn't miss much at all, get bored and find something else to do. Whereas if I browse throughout the day, I'm constantly browsing and never really satiated. So I found this works great for me, but I have also found I am not great at putting it into practice. Hence, why I am posting this at 2:30 pm...

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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by jacob » Wed Dec 19, 2018 3:38 pm


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vexed87
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by vexed87 » Thu Dec 20, 2018 8:43 am

Brilliant! I do find myself in that habit loop he mentions from time to time!

thegreatvoid
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by thegreatvoid » Thu Dec 20, 2018 11:34 am

Before I came to the early retirement community, I was a avid reader of THE MINIMALISTS. I remember reading that Joshua only uses Internet in the library and only watches movies at a friends house.I like this idea and it´s something I want to implement when I retire.

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Kriegsspiel
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by Kriegsspiel » Thu Dec 20, 2018 11:51 am

I haven't gotten home internet. I use it at the library and at the gym. I have also been hotspotting my phone if needed.

daylen
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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by daylen » Thu Dec 20, 2018 12:09 pm

Not very limiting if you are always at the library or gym. :P

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Re: Eliminating Facebook from our lives?

Post by LiquidSapphire » Fri Dec 21, 2018 4:57 pm

I don't find Facebook too detrimental and use it fairly often. I plan a lot of social events with it and it's way easier to track RSVPs and invite a bunch of people at once using Facebook events. They get emails, response at their leisure. If I have a friend who is not on FB, they have to be close enough to me for me to even think of going out of my way to inviting them, whereas if I'm doing a big group, and I see their name, it's no big deal to just throw them into the mix. So I think some people I know who do not have Facebook do get left out sometimes, at least they do in my world. I have made a lot of friends that I probably would not have made if I wasn't active on Facebook, it's a core part of my friend making strategy.
1) Meet random person
2) they seem cool
3) hey are you on FB? Yeah cool let's be friends
4) go add them within the next 24 hours
5) invite them to big group event within next month
6) if they come, cool! probably that person will become a friend
7) if they don't accept FR or they don't come to the event, I might try for a few more times after that but after that the connection fades and eventually I delete them from my friends list.

Other than this I post things I am proud of or think are funny on FB and that is it. I spend almost no time looking at other people's posts. Mainly the people that end up clogging my news feed, I just don't care about them, and the ones I do care about, I already know what's going on. I mainly post to fuel my ego :D

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