that was a good read that in more ways than one reminds me of freaks and geeks, which was such a great little tv show about the same time period, setting, and experiences as the author. highly recommended for everyone as, yes, good humor and anthropology and dramatic characterization (crazy to me that this show is 20 years old already, and still seems so current).
anyway the paul graham writeup was very good, and i also experienced high school as a boring prison experience, although in different settings (catholic boys school abroad).
nevertheless there is a point where i partially disagree with the guy, namely that nerds aren't popular because they choose not to. that reads like a bit of sour grapes or a defense mechanism. then again i don't personally know the guy so i can't say if i think he could or not.
but anyway, there are many cases of extremely smart people who are also popular and socially at ease, and i have met them (lol). so--not all brilliant people become socially outcast nerds. some sre in fact social geniuses.
but there are also cases where a smart person just can't be popular due to lacking a well-developed social brain or some other handicaps. and sure, they can compensate and study and practice and so forth, but it's never going to be their forte.
and that's just fine because the human gene pool needs variability anyway.
so, for those who have a hard time with social matters, and are looking for some science-based solutions, i'd like to recommend the recent work of psychologist ty tashiro.
i have not read his books, but i have listened to him in various podcasts. i like his approach and he makes a lot of sense. e,g this podcast is about the socially awkward. he ends with a very hopeful note:
https://www.verywellmind.com/ty-tashiro ... ast-510099
and this is about previous work he did on relationships. since this social skills subject tends to overlap with the "i need a date" topic, i though i'd link it here too:
"did you pick the right partner?"
https://omny.fm/shows/the-art-of-manlin ... ht-partner
the name of the website always makes me chuckle a little, but if you do too don't let that bias you, it's a really good interview and he breaks things down into simple principles (again, evidence-based, lol) and is solution-oriented.
anyway i might read the books some day, or simply recommend them to friends and ask for reviews lol.
tashiro himself was superawkward as a child but was fortunate to land in the right environment to support his neural difference. and so here is the product of his nature + upbringing.
yes he wears a bow tie hahaha. good signaling.
edited for clarity so i hope that helps