Free will is really "acting according to my desires". By believing in free will I'm not necessarily discounting the fact that my actions might be predetermined. Really that debate is irrelevant.
So what determines my desires? There are desires which are physically wired into me by nature. As a lucky inhabitant of an economically developed country most of those are easily met. Then there are "higher" desires which are determined by which actions I find meaningful.
But ultimately, meaning is an arbitrary notion. To bring meaning to my actions I need a role, an identity.
So how am I supposed to find an identity? People traditionally use their jobs as a major source of their identity, but really attaching ones identity to a single role that can easily be lost is stupid. I've experienced a lot of mental strife from attaching my identity to my academic institution and subject choice. I don't wish to make the same mistake again.
I'm interested, what things in your life are most important to your identity, and how did you come about them?
Identity, Meaning, and Free Will
You can't find your identity. There's this joke about the man who went to India to find himself, but came back disappointed, because he wasn't there.
The problem has a very Zen quality to it. You just are who you are. There's no need to find some special identity. There is nothing to find or deliberately define after which everything will be in order.
In the end, of course, it's up to you what kind of person you are, but your social role doesn't determine this. As it was said so eloquently in fight club: "You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis..."
I find this is more of a social anxiety thing - at least it was to me. The thing with freedom is that it's just a euphemism for personal responsibility. And that can be very stress-inducing at first, especially when looked at from a "having to fit into a certain role" - frame of mind - the one that should be left behind once freedom is attained, since personal responsibility means setting your own rules and following the sound of your own drum in the first place. I found the best way to go about it is taking a deep breath and relaxing first. Freedom means you define your own role as you go and you are the one to measure for yourself how well you fill whatever role you choose. That, I think, is freedom, and while it is a two-edged sword, it's a nice thing to have.
The problem has a very Zen quality to it. You just are who you are. There's no need to find some special identity. There is nothing to find or deliberately define after which everything will be in order.
In the end, of course, it's up to you what kind of person you are, but your social role doesn't determine this. As it was said so eloquently in fight club: "You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis..."
I find this is more of a social anxiety thing - at least it was to me. The thing with freedom is that it's just a euphemism for personal responsibility. And that can be very stress-inducing at first, especially when looked at from a "having to fit into a certain role" - frame of mind - the one that should be left behind once freedom is attained, since personal responsibility means setting your own rules and following the sound of your own drum in the first place. I found the best way to go about it is taking a deep breath and relaxing first. Freedom means you define your own role as you go and you are the one to measure for yourself how well you fill whatever role you choose. That, I think, is freedom, and while it is a two-edged sword, it's a nice thing to have.