My job history is about as long as my arm and I notched another one today when I was reprimanded (and subsequently quit) for having inappropriate hosiery.
Any other good stories around here?
Silliest reason you were fired
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George the original one
- Posts: 5406
- Joined: Wed Jul 28, 2010 3:28 am
- Location: Wettest corner of Orygun
A coworker has a wonderful tale from his youthful days in Mexico City. He got hired onto a construction crew doing high iron work for a new hospital, first day on the job and they send him up to the fifth floor without any training.
Now five floors up isn't much, but when you're clinging to a narrow steel beam, it's plenty far. He's hanging on for dear life while down below, on the ground, the chief medical officer's wife is touring the construction site. Naturally someone spits and nearly hits her (don't know if it was intentional or not).
Boss calls the crew down and asks for the spitter to step forward. No one does. Boss explains that they're all fired if the responsible person isn't put forward. No one is fingered, so the Boss fires the lot.
My coworker had only been at work for 15 minutes!
[happy ending was that he was hired back by the supervisor an hour later because it was obvious that my coworker was spitless while hanging on for dear life]
Now five floors up isn't much, but when you're clinging to a narrow steel beam, it's plenty far. He's hanging on for dear life while down below, on the ground, the chief medical officer's wife is touring the construction site. Naturally someone spits and nearly hits her (don't know if it was intentional or not).
Boss calls the crew down and asks for the spitter to step forward. No one does. Boss explains that they're all fired if the responsible person isn't put forward. No one is fingered, so the Boss fires the lot.
My coworker had only been at work for 15 minutes!
[happy ending was that he was hired back by the supervisor an hour later because it was obvious that my coworker was spitless while hanging on for dear life]
I haven't been fired myself, but I fired a guy once after he accidentally crashed his truck into our building. He had went out to start his truck and let it warm up, and he re-parked it closer to an entrance. Somehow he forgot to put it in park and jumped out with his truck in drive. So it wasn't going real fast. It hit a door and where there was as bunch of glass. He was already on the ropes because he wasn't doing well.
A co-worker of mine got fired for going to the bathroom. I felt like quite the valued, dignified employee that day.
A friend of mine called into work on a Saturday to say she can't come in all weekend. They said ok. Then when she showed up for work on Monday she was fired for not calling in again on Sunday since it's company policy to call in every day when you can't come in.
A friend of mine called into work on a Saturday to say she can't come in all weekend. They said ok. Then when she showed up for work on Monday she was fired for not calling in again on Sunday since it's company policy to call in every day when you can't come in.
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Robert Muir
- Posts: 280
- Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 10:15 pm
@Robert You don't account for the huge amount of sociopaths who are perfect candidates for promotion in the corporate world. Organizations inundated with them turn into upside down places where the big wigs give managers a pat on the back for rooting people out rather than identifying talented employees and giving them more responsibility.
To reiterate mikeBOS's point, my mom is routinely rated the best employee at her place of work but recently when she didn't call everyday she was out of town and not at work (even though she had put in the request a month before and told the assistant manager before leaving), her manager told her to sign a piece of paper saying she violated company policy of not calling everyday (got angry when she hesitated) and wrote it was her "last warning." Later, manager of the manager told my mom to "not worry." Okay, sure. Why worry when there is such a sensible, logical work policy in place?!
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AnneBentham
- Posts: 53
- Joined: Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:15 am
I got fired for getting a boyfriend. My supervisor was crazy-jealous and changed my schedule without telling me. He made it look like I just didn't show up to work on the weekend that I was moving in with the new guy. I had requested that time off and he approved it before he found out about my plans. He was the only one with documentation (which magically disappeared) so there was nothing I could do about it.
Speaking of getting fired:
Let's say we have two(2) groups of employees at a company.
The CEO of the company came out of group number 1. However, group number 2 also has some authoritative power as well.
A huge project on a continuing series of business is underway on a daily basis in the company. The two groups of employees are constantly bickering back and forth on how to perform various parts of the projects---especially how to fund the project.
The CEO seems elusive most of the time. The CEO likes to take many and expensive vacations on the company's dime. He takes his whole family, even buying ultra expensive clothing for his wife, and often. His trips cost the company unknown large amounts of money.
The CEO and the two groups of employees are experts at keeping the shareholders in the dark. The shareholders have no idea if the company is making or losing money.
Common practice is secrecy and playing the blame game by both groups of employees. Group one employees lean towards the CEO, and group two employees lean towards their own group leader, which is a person that hates the CEO.
The company operates in a very inefficient manner. They even have the powers between the two groups to shut the company down for unspecified periods of time. Individual employees like to even go on TV and blame other employees for being stupid with the company's assets, and of gross overspending on projects that are senseless.
Do you think someone needs to be fired? Will the company survive? Is this "really" anyway to run a company?
Let's say we have two(2) groups of employees at a company.
The CEO of the company came out of group number 1. However, group number 2 also has some authoritative power as well.
A huge project on a continuing series of business is underway on a daily basis in the company. The two groups of employees are constantly bickering back and forth on how to perform various parts of the projects---especially how to fund the project.
The CEO seems elusive most of the time. The CEO likes to take many and expensive vacations on the company's dime. He takes his whole family, even buying ultra expensive clothing for his wife, and often. His trips cost the company unknown large amounts of money.
The CEO and the two groups of employees are experts at keeping the shareholders in the dark. The shareholders have no idea if the company is making or losing money.
Common practice is secrecy and playing the blame game by both groups of employees. Group one employees lean towards the CEO, and group two employees lean towards their own group leader, which is a person that hates the CEO.
The company operates in a very inefficient manner. They even have the powers between the two groups to shut the company down for unspecified periods of time. Individual employees like to even go on TV and blame other employees for being stupid with the company's assets, and of gross overspending on projects that are senseless.
Do you think someone needs to be fired? Will the company survive? Is this "really" anyway to run a company?
That's very thinly veiled, HSpencer! What are you trying to say? 
If it were me, as a shareholder, I'd bring in an economizer, cut all but the necessary staff, and start hiring from scratch. But, hiring based on merit, rather than fancy titles on resumes.
But, movement like that in a large company like that you speak of, is nearly unheard of without somebody going "postal".
If it were me, as a shareholder, I'd bring in an economizer, cut all but the necessary staff, and start hiring from scratch. But, hiring based on merit, rather than fancy titles on resumes. But, movement like that in a large company like that you speak of, is nearly unheard of without somebody going "postal".
I was once fired for spouting communist propaganda (really for insubordination, my favorite).
As a young teenager I was working as a cook in a restaurant during the summer, and one 95 degree and humid day the air conditioning quit. With large broilers and ovens going full blast and no air circulation, the heat became so unbearable that my coworker went home sick, but I stayed by taking breaks every 20-30 minutes and drinking ice water so that I could keep going.
During one break, the manager came over and got in my face and said “What the hell are you doing!” Out of nowhere I said “I’m waiting for the horny fist of the proletariat to rise up and smash the greedy latter-day robber barons of profit.” Now I was no socialist, not at all, but I liked the sound of that sentence (it rolls off the tongue nicely) and I figured that my boss would not understand it, which would tick him off even more.
It worked like a stun gun. When he came to, he said “You’re fired!” and I replied “GOOD!” I punched out, changed clothes, sat in the dining room and waited. After about 20 minutes, things had degenerated into chaos. My boss saw me, came over and said “Get the hell up there!” I said, “I thought I was fired.” He replied: “Shut up! Get the hell up there now!” So I did.
As a young teenager I was working as a cook in a restaurant during the summer, and one 95 degree and humid day the air conditioning quit. With large broilers and ovens going full blast and no air circulation, the heat became so unbearable that my coworker went home sick, but I stayed by taking breaks every 20-30 minutes and drinking ice water so that I could keep going.
During one break, the manager came over and got in my face and said “What the hell are you doing!” Out of nowhere I said “I’m waiting for the horny fist of the proletariat to rise up and smash the greedy latter-day robber barons of profit.” Now I was no socialist, not at all, but I liked the sound of that sentence (it rolls off the tongue nicely) and I figured that my boss would not understand it, which would tick him off even more.
It worked like a stun gun. When he came to, he said “You’re fired!” and I replied “GOOD!” I punched out, changed clothes, sat in the dining room and waited. After about 20 minutes, things had degenerated into chaos. My boss saw me, came over and said “Get the hell up there!” I said, “I thought I was fired.” He replied: “Shut up! Get the hell up there now!” So I did.
@Nagerusu,
Thank you for the comment. The incident took place decades ago, when I was about 15, and I moved on shortly thereafter. The business went under some years after that. Never forgot it though, or the other lessons learned, which go to the two interesting points you raise:
1. Keeping employees or the business: Ultimately, nobody cares about the business or keeping employees if it comes at the expense of ego. The ability to abuse underlings is considered a perk more valuable than anything.
2. Asking for a raise: Asking for a raise when you have an employer over a barrel will go as follows: raise granted no matter what it is, immediately hire and train a replacement, then fire you. I heard this expressed and saw it carried out. Again, they really don't care.
Thank you for the comment. The incident took place decades ago, when I was about 15, and I moved on shortly thereafter. The business went under some years after that. Never forgot it though, or the other lessons learned, which go to the two interesting points you raise:
1. Keeping employees or the business: Ultimately, nobody cares about the business or keeping employees if it comes at the expense of ego. The ability to abuse underlings is considered a perk more valuable than anything.
2. Asking for a raise: Asking for a raise when you have an employer over a barrel will go as follows: raise granted no matter what it is, immediately hire and train a replacement, then fire you. I heard this expressed and saw it carried out. Again, they really don't care.
@Hoplite:
1. True, they like power and status more than anything. I have yet to come to a workplace where it was not so in some way or another.
2. Also true. But try looking at work as working for yourself.
Always do the following:
- Try to become good/better at what you do, so when they fire you, you have a better chance at getting another job.
- Keep a financial reserve that can last at least 6 months, so you can take your time to find that new job.
- Consider work as something you do for yourself, not for someone else. You need to pay your bills, so you exchange your qualities and time to someone who's willing to pay. Than it won't matter as much if your boss is an idiot.
This will make it easier to switch jobs when needed and you'll feel better about what you're doing.
1. True, they like power and status more than anything. I have yet to come to a workplace where it was not so in some way or another.
2. Also true. But try looking at work as working for yourself.
Always do the following:
- Try to become good/better at what you do, so when they fire you, you have a better chance at getting another job.
- Keep a financial reserve that can last at least 6 months, so you can take your time to find that new job.
- Consider work as something you do for yourself, not for someone else. You need to pay your bills, so you exchange your qualities and time to someone who's willing to pay. Than it won't matter as much if your boss is an idiot.
This will make it easier to switch jobs when needed and you'll feel better about what you're doing.