Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

How to pass, fit in, eventually set an example, and ultimately lead the way.
TheFIminator
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Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by TheFIminator »

Hi all,

I am sure the parents in here will know that getting your teenage/young adult children to get their eyes off their phones and have more than a mono-syllable conversation is difficult to say the least. And talking about finance is like talking alien to them. I have had a few conversations with young family members and had some success but I dont know how much stuck really.

I am trying a few different techniques to see what works and what does not. The hope is that eventually a bit will sink in and they may sub-conscientiously move in the right financial direction.

Interested to here about your stories/experiences.

James_0011
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by James_0011 »

I wouldn’t recommend preaching to people. Who cares what they do as long as it’s not hurting you?

Maybe frugality isn’t right for them?

Than again I don’t have kids and don’t plan on having any so I don’t know what the parent mentality is like.

slowtraveler
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by slowtraveler »

Looking at my phone is what inspired me to learn. I listened to some Rich Dad Poor Dad, The Cash flow Quadrant, and other audio books on long drives to start here. I found the forum through the internet as well. Track spending on my phone via an Excel sheet. I can even invest from my phone.

EdithKeeler
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by EdithKeeler »

I think you can’t make people interested in something until they are. Personally, I think it’s a matter of putting stuff in front of people (in a non-pushy, quiet, off and on way) until something catches their interest. I know I’m a smart person, and I generally managed my money ok, but it wasn’t until I read YMOYL until things clicked. And what spurred me to read it in the first place was 1) I was starting to get frustrated with my job and 2) someone I knew who was only a bit older than me quit and started a business. Talking to him I realized that despite the fact we made the same money, he had stashed way more away. But I think for me it was just right place, right time. What got me interested is probably not going to get everyone going. If someone had just handed me a copy and said “read it” 6 or 8 months earlier I’d have said “phhhhbbt.”

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RFS
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by RFS »

When I was about 13, my Dad gave me a notebook with pages and pages about finance. Stocks, retirement accounts, everything. Teenage me couldn't have cared less. Only the sinking feeling of "holy shit, this is absolutely miserable" at my first full-time office job spurred learning about finance as a priority.

Your kids will learn finance with ease- if it makes sense in the kind of life that unfolds around them. Maybe an immediate tactic you can do is create a "Bank of theFIminator," which accrues interest at a 10% annual rate with monthly compounding. Your kids could put some of their money in there, and see that it's profitable to keep their money invested.

Campitor
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Campitor »

Present behavior with future negative consequences lack the immediate feedback loops which encourage better choices. It's easy to ignore the future when the "now" beckons with debauchery, the illusion of everlasting youth, and freedom from responsibility. You can spend a lifetime studying and never be exposed to the concepts of early retirement or frugality.

Our western society is built on the concept of creating goods and services that entice money out of our wallets 24/7/365. I learned to be frugal at a very early age because I had no choice - being 1st generation immigrants from South America guaranteed entry level at the lowest wrung of the economic ladder. But the bonus was we weren't indoctrinated with the culture of victimhood, excess, or dependency on the State. Working hard, education, saving, and moving ahead was drilled into our heads loud and often. How many of today's youth experience that? I can't blame someone for acting poorly when they never been taught that their actions are robbing their future.

You need an anti-tobacco level campaign to raise awareness on frugality and personal finance. But what media giant is going to champion that when it means loss of advertising revenue and/or future consumers? Personal finance and frugality should be taught at every school starting from 1st grade all the way through college; it should be a mandatory course.

Gilberto de Piento
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Gilberto de Piento »

Personal finance and frugality should be taught at every school starting from 1st grade all the way through college; it should be a mandatory course.
Some states require what is usually referred to as financial literacy. It doesn't go as far as I would like but schools are including it more than I think they used to. For example, see pages 17 and 18 here for Illinois: https://www.isbe.net/Documents/K-12-SS-Standards.pdf

jacob
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by jacob »

On that note ... when I stopped blogging back in 2011, there were about 5 FIRE blogs in total, in the universe.

I just learned that there are now 1500+ registered FIRE blogs :o

Ten years ago, I would have estimated that about 1/1000 had heard about FIRE (based on published books, the fraction of authors and readership). MMM now estimates that 1/50 have heard about it. This means that most people now know someone who knows something even if they're not talking about it. Personally I get a tremendous kick out of it when I talk about FIRE to someone and they ask me if I've heard about Mr Money Mustache :mrgreen: ;)

Now, it's my understanding that for most humans it matters more who says it than what is being said.

This is why I prefer indirect strategies. I've never given the ERE book directly to family (aside from the parents ... who didn't read it)(*). Instead, try to plant seeds here and there as appropriate. It's kinda like the strategy for how you supposedly teach children that reading is good. You don't tell them to read while you're watching TV. Instead, you're always seen reading. And hopefully they'll figure reading is good ... if not by basic mimicry. And if you're lucky, 10-20% of the brats will draw the intended conclusion :P

In any case ... when/where I grew up, my parents did 100% not involve me in any part of financial planning or considerations. As a result, I both had no clue AND no interest. Being a teenager (and budding scientist), I would have had no interest anyway (I thought that "business is for losers who are not smart enough for science" :roll: ). However, later on ... if/when I changed my mind, those lessons/experiences would have be useful. So maybe also get young adults involved in the "chore" of doing budgets/plans/... because maybe some day they'll change their mind and realize that it applies to them too.

(*) One family member had a BF at some point who had actually read about me on reddit and subsequently read the ERE book. That was kinda cool.

Farm_or
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Farm_or »

For the three of my kids, two didn't seem to get any of the speeches or good examples demonstrated. Now that I think about it, it seems that none of them got it that way.. What has been a tremendous help is 4H and now FFA.

When a child has a project, and it is peer supported, and the adult messages are consistent, and it's written down, and they actually apply the hard work of (gasp) mathematics; it makes some positive effect.

I only wish that I knew that sooner, so that the other two older children could have benefitted the same. But that is how it goes with parenting? Parents don't really know what the hell they are doing with the first try.

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fiby41
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by fiby41 »

Weather an approach is appropriate for that target audience would depend on the age-range of the young adult:

THE TIBETAN VIEW OF CHILDREN'S EDUCATION
• No humiliation or corporal punishment.

• The first period is up to 5 years. The child should be treated "like a king". You can not forbid anything, just distract. If he does something dangerous, then make a frightened face and publish a frightened cry.
The child understands this language perfectly. At this time, activity, curiosity, interest in life are laid. The child is still unable to build long logical chains. For example, he broke an expensive vase. He does not understand that to buy such a vase you need to work hard, earn money. He will perceive the punishment as suppression from the position of strength. You will teach him not to beat the vase, but obey the one who is stronger. Do you want it?

• The second period is from 5 to 10. At this time, the child needs to be treated "as a slave". Set tasks before him and demand their fulfillment. You can punish for failure (but not physically). At this time, intellect is actively developing. The child must learn to predict the reaction of people to his actions, cause a positive attitude towards himself and avoid manifestation of the negative. At this time, do not be afraid to load the child with knowledge.

• The third period from 10 to 15. How to raise a child during this period? How to deal with it? As with an equal. Not on equal terms, namely "as with the equal", because you still have more experience and knowledge. Consult with him on all important issues, provide and encourage independence. Impose your will in "velvet gloves" in the process of discussion, tips, tips. If you do not like something, then focus on negative consequences, avoiding direct prohibitions. At this time, independent and independent thinking is being formed.

• The last period is from 15 years. Treat him with respect. It is too late to educate a child, and you can only reap the fruits of your labors.

What consequences can lead to non-observance of these rules?
• If you suppress a child under 5, then you will suppress his life activity, interest in life, intelligence. Accustom it thoughtlessly and habitually obey the brute force. Make of him an easy sacrifice for all kinds of scoundrels.
• If you continue to lisp after 5, the child will grow up infantile, unable to work and in general to spiritual efforts.
• If you patronize a child as a child after 10, he will grow insecure, dependent on more independent friends who can not always exert the right influence.
• If you do not respect the child after 15, he will not forgive you for it and will leave forever at the earliest opportunity.

Almost Cat
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Almost Cat »

I don't know how old they are, but I'd say that lecturing isn't the best way to approach this.

Do they have any spending money? Have you used that as an opportunity to teach budgeting?
Are they included in budgeting for the family?
Is "investing" anywhere in your family's budget? Have you discussed your portfolio with them?
Are they earning any money? Translate prices of goods and services into hours of life.
Have you ever told them "we might buy this, but we don't really need it. If I had this same conversation when I was your age and decided not to go with the purchase but invest the money instead in A, I'd have this much right now. If I invested it in B, I'd have this much. If I invested it in C, I'd have nothing. Never put all your eggs in one basket."
Read https://www.joshuakennon.com/shares-of- ... plan-drip/, having skin in the game might also be good for getting them interested.
If they're on their phones all the time, suggest a good budgeting app, maybe. Send them links on Whatsapp.
Are you FIRE or on your way there? Have you ever discussed that with them? "Because of this and this, I no longer have to work/won't have to work in 5 years. I want to do this and this instead" That might spike someone's interest.

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GandK
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by GandK »

Our adult children are interested in saving for the future to the degree that they have a solid dream for that future. Some don't yet. A lot of our "personal finance" conversations now are about goal setting, therefore, and not about money.

As far as how we dealt with personal finance in the home, we had three main financial rules for our kids:

1. We will care for all basic needs, but in order to receive money from us, you have to do age-appropriate work (no allowance or handouts).
2. While under our roof and under 18, you will donate at least 10% of all gross money earned to charity, and will save/invest a chunk of the remainder for your future.
3. Money spent and invested must be tracked responsibly in order to receive more money (a budget, no bounced checks, etc.). They tend to do this on their phone once they have one, so might not help with putting it down...

The kids were also very aware of our own saving, giving and spending habits. We talk openly in the home about our household budget amounts, our investment strategies and which charities to support.

This has worked extremely well. Although most of our grown kids have made occasional bad decisions regarding how much to save or what to invest in, they're doing both. Not one is financially incapable or floundering. Once they figure out where they're going in life, they will know what to do to get themselves there.

What we did wrong in retrospect: taxes and insurance. We did not model filing taxes for our kids, or talk enough about taxes or insurance in general. I think all of them have been shell-shocked about those costs and procedures. More to the point, we've walked two through tax and insurance problems after the fact, after ignorance-based mistakes were made. Ugh.

prognastat
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by prognastat »

I think the best things you can do is model the right behaviour(and don't make it seem like a huge chore or they definitely won't be interested) and be supportive if they show any interest, but don't force it.

On top of that teaching them some of the lessons in supportive not punishing ways. I think making allowance vary based on chores/school performance etc is good in both motivating them to learn those good behaviours without direct punishment and also teach them that money is something you earn in exchange for work. The other thing is I would "pay interest" on money they have saved. If they choose to save money rather than spend it add interest at the end of each month on top of their regular allowance. This will hopefully teach them that money saved leads to more money reinforcing that delaying gratification leads to extra reward. Let them control their own money though at first in cash and once they get a little older by setting up their own bank account with a debit card. You controlling their money is unlikely going to lead to them continuing the behaviour once you are no longer in control.

Farm_or
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Farm_or »

The "shock" of taxes and insurance kind of cracks me up. As a responsible parent, you can get real lonely for a long time trying to teach responsible behavior.

It's not until the experience of existence that a lot of those lessons become apparent. That is the moment you have been waiting so long for! "My dad is not a heartless dictator? He was trying to prepare me for this! That's love."

BWND
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by BWND »

Tell them you'll withhold their inheritance unless they can show the executor of the will that they've saved on average at least 50% of their income from 18 until your death?

cmonkey
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by cmonkey »

Unless someone shows anything more than fleeting/basic interest in a subject I am familiar with, I have nothing to teach and generally just keep my mouth shut. They can figure it out for themselves!

Finn
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Finn »

Kids that age don’t yet have the experience of what working life really is.

So the things that inspire many of us, don’t generally resonate with them.

Most kids under 28 years ”go by the book” – what they consider to be normal/deemed prudent. Their primary focus in life is on finding their place in society, not being an outcast.

If kids would see ER as normal, nearly all would pursue it.

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fiby41
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by fiby41 »

Not putting my phone down was responsible for me starting to think about personal finance.

Hobbes
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Hobbes »

Well, I'm youngish (27), and for me it took a few days in the trenches (intense software job) a few years back to realize that having the option to retire very early would be a good thing. That, and watching Alone in the Wilderness :D

Jin+Guice
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Re: Getting young adults to put their phones down and start thinking about personal finance

Post by Jin+Guice »

Did y'all create this thread title specifically to piss me off?

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