indefinite pet sitting

How to pass, fit in, eventually set an example, and ultimately lead the way.
fuyu
Posts: 85
Joined: Sun Sep 01, 2013 2:02 pm

Re: indefinite pet sitting

Post by fuyu »

cat9 wrote:
Fri Jan 26, 2018 6:59 pm
fuyu wrote:
Fri Jan 26, 2018 6:39 pm
...
She's a really good friend usually.
And the definition of a really good friend is... ?
Hmm... hard to put into words. For me, the difference between friend and close acquaintance is would I be willing to go out of my way to visit them if they didn't live nearby and would they would do the same and that's my dividing line. When we lived in different state (about 3.5 hours apart by car), we would take turns to visit each other every other month during the weekend when it wasn't my busy season (There wasn't a busy season in any of her previous jobs during the past 6 years.)

As for the really good part, not in order of importance, she's someone I can be completely honest with, whine about stuff, and act childish around. She helps me with areas that I'm bad at and general stuff, supportive of my goals even though its weird to her (like ERE), and I usually feel happier after spending time around her. I assume it's the same for her.
Last edited by fuyu on Sat Jan 27, 2018 1:32 pm, edited 4 times in total.

halfmoon
Posts: 697
Joined: Mon Nov 07, 2016 10:19 pm

Re: indefinite pet sitting

Post by halfmoon »

In my opinion, that's a well-considered answer to a great question. I'm glad you extricated yourself from the dog-sitting (except one day per week?) without damaging a friendship you value. As an aside, it's probably good for the puppy to experience daycare socialization.

I don't know if others respond the same way, but your avatar makes me feel protective of you in the same way that 7W5's current avatar makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. Anyway, here's hoping that your puppy-poop-wiping days are over. :D

pukingRainbows
Posts: 131
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2015 5:56 pm

Re: indefinite pet sitting

Post by pukingRainbows »

fuyu wrote:
Fri Jan 26, 2018 6:39 pm
Her husband has jokingly said a few times that he would hire me as their nanny in the future ...
I hope that if that happens, you will feel comfortable enough to be honest and set boundaries whenever the friendship descends into inconsiderate and unreasonable requests.

cat9
Posts: 5
Joined: Tue Aug 01, 2017 3:44 pm

Re: indefinite pet sitting

Post by cat9 »

Though I asked the question, I didn't have an answer, and I think you gave a good one, Fuyu. In particular I'd not appreciated that this is a friendship that has lasted over a number of years and despite distance. Had it been briefer I might have been presumptuous and pointed out that you're clearly someone that many people would count themselves lucky to have you as a friend, so shake loose.

My worries are more about the puppy. It's kept in a crate? Are these veal farmers, or what? Is this normal treatment of a pet in America?

I'm not a dog person, my experience is restricted to my childhood. My parents rewarded me when I was about 11 by getting a puppy. I'd always been fond of nature and animals, so this was delightful. The puppy was bouncy, enthusiastic, utterly adorable. None of us had any experience with dogs before. It came as something of a surprise when 6 months later we found we had an uncontrollable, yappy, aggressive nightmare for a pet. I still have a small scar on my hand as a reminder.

After 2 or 3 years a local farmer shot the dog. Allegedly mistaking it for a fox. More likely it was sheep worrying, I suspect.

With hindsight, dog training classes are a MUST HAVE. Dogs treated right are just looking for a leader, the classes are for training the owners, I guess you know. I've no idea how you can plant the seed and get your friends to do this, but I really hope they go that route.

If only there were baby training classes as well. Will your friends keep their toddler in a crate until age 18? Sounds a good plan actually.

Good luck!

fuyu
Posts: 85
Joined: Sun Sep 01, 2013 2:02 pm

Re: indefinite pet sitting

Post by fuyu »

cat9 wrote:
Sun Jan 28, 2018 3:16 pm

My worries are more about the puppy. It's kept in a crate? Are these veal farmers, or what? Is this normal treatment of a pet in America?

I'm not a dog person, my experience is restricted to my childhood. My parents rewarded me when I was about 11 by getting a puppy. I'd always been fond of nature and animals, so this was delightful. The puppy was bouncy, enthusiastic, utterly adorable. None of us had any experience with dogs before. It came as something of a surprise when 6 months later we found we had an uncontrollable, yappy, aggressive nightmare for a pet. I still have a small scar on my hand as a reminder.

After 2 or 3 years a local farmer shot the dog. Allegedly mistaking it for a fox. More likely it was sheep worrying, I suspect.

With hindsight, dog training classes are a MUST HAVE. Dogs treated right are just looking for a leader, the classes are for training the owners, I guess you know. I've no idea how you can plant the seed and get your friends to do this, but I really hope they go that route.

If only there were baby training classes as well. Will your friends keep their toddler in a crate until age 18? Sounds a good plan actually.

Good luck!
Yes, best friend insists on keeping the puppy in a cage for several hours during day and when he sleeps at night. The rest of the time, the puppy is in fenced off area in the living room. I don't think so? Other friends and acquaintance allow their dogs free run of their home.

I'm sorry, that must have been hard to lose your dog like that.

They already bring the puppy to a weekly training class. Personally, I think their dog is already well-behaved. He doesn't bark, howl, try to chase after cars or pull on his leash during walks, or beg for human food. He'll sit and stay when people command him. He comes when you call his name.

Lol. I think if they stick to their plan of having a baby in the next year or so and don't plan out how they'll take care of it like the puppy, they're going to start arguing more, especially about money.
Last edited by fuyu on Sun Jan 28, 2018 4:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

jacob
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Re: indefinite pet sitting

Post by jacob »

Many doggy things have their analogy in the human world. Crates for dogs is like schooling for humans. It's good training for spending life in a cubicle or blocked into the kitchen or living room or wherever so as to get the maximum level of predictability and safety. While the owner spends their day in a cubicle, the dog does the same at home in the crate or a restricted area. Then they each get out for a few hours and a walk/drive in the evening before going to sleep. There are, of course, different level of tolerances for that, both in humans and dogs. However, keeping a dog in a crate 24/7 is like keeping a human in prison 24/7. Neither works well, but 10/5 seems to be rather universally accepted.

7Wannabe5
Posts: 9369
Joined: Fri Oct 18, 2013 9:03 am

Re: indefinite pet sitting

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

Some say being in a crate calms a puppy because it mimics the maternal den. So, it serves the same purpose as swaddling a distraught human infant to mimic the tight confines of the womb. Many pet owners, and baby-tenders, make the opposite mistake towards over-stimulation. Think about how you would feel if you were rather helpless and being cared for by a giant. How would you want him to pick you up, feed you, or entertain you? It might be okay if he just put you back in the crate sometimes, right?

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