Chad said: I understand what you are saying and agree to a certain extent, but I'm not seriously dating someone that makes significantly less than I do at this point in my life. Worked too hard and sacrificed too much to give it to someone else.
Yeah, I get where you are coming from, but I am trying to predict, not just one, but two or three possible life-cycles away for you guys. Trust me, I have interacted with many leery, bitter middle-aged recently divorced men, but I have also interacted with never married men who are now in their 50s, and even older men for whom that first (or last) bad divorce is now more than a few years down the road.
Affluent middle-aged men do take a hit both financially and emotionally when they divorce, especially if custody battles come into play, but 5 or 10 years later they are usually not just back to equilibrium financially, but actually better off than when they were married. Their ex-wives, OTOH, regardless of details of divorce settlement, are usually worse off financially, unless they have remarried.
Take the example of my current BF. Didn't marry until he was almost 40. Decides he wants a family and makes conservative pick of reasonably attractive woman with professional career. Few years later falls in love with his version of beautiful dream-woman while his previously chubby, now fat, wife is pregnant with his child. Does, I am certain, terrible job of hiding this. Chubby wife bonds with baby, turns her back to him. Scene cut for 10 years of mutual misery for good of child. Brief escape to overseas assignment, affair with young 3rd world citizen concubine. Still in love with dream-girl. Finally files for divorce. Dream girl picks other man. Heart-broken, divorced, still sleeping on sofa at best male friend's house, ex won't let him see kid. Somehow ends up as third stallion on string of very odd poly-amorous female who is willing to tolerate his sad-sack perspective in exchange for symphony tickets, because she already has one man helping her with her "purpose" and another providing her with romantic validation. Even though his ex is nicking him for the maximum child-support hit and even got 3 years of alimony, money is the least of his problems. THAT COULD BE YOU!!!
@Dragline: Interesting podcast. I have noted that I am possibly the only single/divorced mother member of this forum (except for Western Europe-style virtually-married cohabiting females, who were also exempted from study) , and even that was marginal since I think my youngest child was in her last year of college when I joined this group.
Also, I considered delaying until 64 (two 7 year skin-cycles away), but might require capital investment in boob-job.