Open relationship?

How to explain ERE, arranging family matters
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fiby41
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Re: Open relationship?

Post by fiby41 » Mon Sep 11, 2017 2:17 pm

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Societal implications of legalizing polygamy

7Wannabe5
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Re: Open relationship?

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Tue Sep 12, 2017 9:49 am

@fiby41:

I would assume this chart actually visualizes the implications of polygyny (many wives), as opposed to polygamy (many spouses gender-neutrality?) I would also imagine that a similar chart for monogamy would show less movement, and a thicker middle, but would also need sub-model of hidden black-market (clandestine affairs, prostitution, pornography, etc.) for complete accuracy? I would also suggest that a chart for open polyamory (many spouses and/or other relationships, gender-equality) would exhibit a complex, resilient, multi-dimensional web with all sorts of flows up, down and around.

Somewhere in the Quran, something is written along the lines of "There are many good or valid or acceptable reasons to pick a wife. Beauty, money, family connections or shared-faith. Shared faith is the best reason. " If both men and women are doing the picking of up to 4 different partners for 4 different reasons (maybe co-parent, long-term lover, hobby-cuddle-buddy, and next-new-thang?) the possibilities become immense!

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fiby41
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Re: Open relationship?

Post by fiby41 » Tue Sep 12, 2017 12:55 pm

fiby41 wrote:
Mon Sep 11, 2017 2:17 pm
Societal implications of legalizing polygamy
https://m.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1 ... &source=48

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fiby41
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Re: Open relationship?

Post by fiby41 » Tue Sep 12, 2017 2:13 pm

7Wannabe5 wrote:
Tue Sep 12, 2017 9:49 am
I would assume this chart actually visualizes the implications of polygyny (many wives), as opposed to polygamy (many spouses gender-neutrality?)
Polygamy only.
If dowry is the cost women pay to marry up, then women of high socioeconomic status pick mates off the top of the male dominance hierarchy.

The overarching argument is:
1 Muslims are the only group to be constitutionally allowed multiple wives
2 historic practice is used as a justification for it
3 if historic precedence is being used as a justification for modern practices (it shouldn't) then examples from Hindu history can be used to justify polygamy

Example, the Pandava brothers married Kunti in the epic Mahabharata. Swayamvar is a competitive event in which men compete for the hand of the bride-to-be in marriage. Although Arjuna had won Kunti's swayamvar and Kunti approved of him, when they went to his mother, who was in forest-exile, to seek her blessings, she was engrossed in meditation.

Arjuna: Look, I want you see...
Mom: What's there to see? I'm busy, share among yourselves as always...
Now kiss... One at a time, please.
Somewhere in the Quran, something is written along the lines of "There are many good or valid or acceptable reasons to pick a wife. Beauty, money, family connections or shared-faith
1 Muhammad's first wife was a lot older & richer than he. She died soon after (childless) survived by only Muhammad who inherited all her wealth.
2 Pedophile: Ayesha (1 of 13) was married to Muhammad at 6 who consumated (=had sex) the marriage at 9.
Shared faith is the best reason.
3 Love jihad: Marrying a nonbeliever is forbidden, unless the spouse converts first, before marriage, of course.
4 Having sex with that which your right hand posseses ie. a slave, is okay
5 Nikah: One night marriage
6 And on top of that you can have 4 wives... the possibilities become immense!

7Wannabe5
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Re: Open relationship?

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Wed Sep 13, 2017 9:16 am

@fiby41:

Trust me. I am no advocate of the practice of allowing men 4 wives and women only 1 husband, OR the practice prior to Islam of allowing men as many wives as they wanted. However, I would note that the number 4 was a limitation set by the religion, not a recommendation. Obviously, cuckoo-bananas modern sects of any religion will make use of any misinterpretation of original texts that best serve their purposes.

Anyways, Muhammads' first wife was older and wealthier, but she did not die childless. They had daughters. One of whom was the "mother" of the Shia lineage. Conversion was not always required for marriage, and Muhammad did have a son who only survived to be around 3 years old with a wife who remained Christian. Think of the possibilities for different courses of human history if that child had survived!

That said, I must admit that I was wrongly assuming that the term "hypergamy" referred to females choosing to have multiple sexual partners, not the practice of marrying up the ladder. There is also very little research into what the "natural" choices or practices of females might be over the long run in a situation in which they are granted full legal status. What I am attempting to add to the discussion is the consideration of the possibility that strict monogamy is also an example of "historic precedence being used to justify modern practice." Determining social status of an individual in modern American is a bit of conundrum, but there is some evidence that when women achieve full economic parity at a fairly high level of affluence, and are given leeway to engage in multiple relationships, they switch over to choosing additional males more on the basis of masculine beauty, just like men have always done historically. As the lyrics to the country song go:
A poor girl wants to marry
And a rich girl wants to flirt
A rich man goes to college
And a poor man goes to work

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fiby41
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Re: Open relationship?

Post by fiby41 » Mon Sep 18, 2017 1:06 am

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Explanation: punchline is statement of the Pythagoras theorem.

liberty
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Re: Open relationship?

Post by liberty » Mon Sep 18, 2017 12:33 pm

wood wrote:
Tue May 03, 2016 6:10 am
Have any of you been in a monogamous relationship and then made it open/poly? Why and how did you do it? (Cheating doesn't count as a permanent solution!)
Yes, after a few weeks of prison feeling I asked to make it "open" so that I could fuck around again.

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