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The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2016 4:56 pm
by Ego
https://www.1843magazine.com/features/t ... y-of-tears

“Individuals living in more affluent, democratic, extroverted, and individualistic countries,” they wrote, “tend to report to cry more often.” Although people enduring unenviable economic circumstances might be more plagued by depression, those from richer cultures shed more tears. Australasian and American men emerged as the weepiest in the world; their Nigerian, Bulgarian and Malaysian counterparts the most dry eyed. Women in Sweden outcried those in Ghana and Nepal. The female populations of countries where gender equality was highest wept more copiously than those where it was lower. The evidence also showed – contrary to centuries of stereotyping – that the inhabitants of colder climates wept more frequently than those who lived in warmer zones. Tears, the study suggested, were not evidence of primitivism, as they had been for Darwin. They were not even good indicators of distress. Rather than being the habit of the wretched of the Earth, weeping appeared to be an indicator of privilege.

Re: The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2016 11:04 am
by enigmaT120
Well they don't do any good.

Re: The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2016 5:12 pm
by jennypenny
I think some of the misconception over whether certain cultures cry more than others comes from the lack of distinction between public vs. private tears. Some cultures are more honest and open than others. It doesn't surprise me that little public weeping was recorded in Victorian England, yet the literature from that period often portrays a bleak and stormy undercurrent.


Regarding the rest, it's probably one of two things (or both). As the author mentioned in the article, people in cultures that hover at the bottom of Maslow's Hierarchy probably can't afford the energy expenditure on outward displays of emotion. It might be a preservation mechanism. Same with cultures or people in crisis (like during the holocaust). The higher someone is on the Hierarchy, the more excess mental and physical energy they have to expend on overt feelings.

The other thing it could be is just a difference in expectations. People in poorer cultures have lower expectations, kind of like an imposed stoicism. Our current culture is the opposite. Expectations are unreasonably high. Social media increases the pressure on people to top each other's experiences, raising the bar on even the most mundane of activities. (leading to pictures of dinner and "OMG! BEST MEAL EVER!!" or "Does that look medium rare to you?!! WORSE MEAL EVER!!" )

Sorry, I'm veering OT. I've complained before about meaning inflation leading to discontentedness. It's just that when you expect to find 'meaning' in everything, you've got to keep the emotional volume dialed up to 11 all the time. It doesn't surprise me that we've gone soft emotionally as well as physically.

Re: The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2016 7:03 pm
by 7Wannabe5
Estrogen makes people more weepy. Estrogen is stored in fat. Affluent people are fatter than impoverished people.

Re: The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2016 11:22 pm
by JamesR
The only time I cry is when I watch a real tearjerker film, ideally involving some form of unrequited love and somebody has cancer.

Re: The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2016 8:12 am
by Sclass
I find myself crying about a late sibling now that I have more time in private. I've buried it since I was ten but it has found its way to the surface of my consciousness lately. I kept it confined to my dreams for many years.

Luxury has a lot to do with it. I never had the time or energy to let my mind go there in the past. Now I can let my mind wander. I hang around my mother's home and see photos and a tarnished urn of ashes. I reconnect over tea with old friends who ask why I never talk about it. The old fools start digging around in the graveyard.

It happened yesterday while I was going over some old financial documents. "Mr. SClass who is the joint holder?" Embarrassing ten minutes. At least my SO was around to rescue me. The kid helping us probably is wondering why I'm so weepy over something that happened before he was born.

Talk about luxury. If I had been doing what a good forty seven year old worker should be doing at ten on a Monday morning this would have not been happening. :P it's a good problem.

Re: The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2016 6:02 pm
by Peanut
I remember when my grandfather was in his 90s and I asked him about his family growing up. There were many brothers and sisters and one brother who died young. He teared up remembering him. I was amazed because it happened decades upon decades ago. And I'd never seen him cry before. But it affirmed for me that love is forever.

Re: The Luxury of Tears

Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2016 6:34 pm
by jacob
Americans are currently in the habit of solving most problems with either guns, therapeuts or lawyers. It's definitely a luxury.