DutchGirl's journal

[DutchGirl]

Performance review went ok. I told my boss that I want to have a 24 to 28 hour contract instead of the current 20 hour/week contract. She wrote down "wants to go up to 24 hours/week" and I corrected her and said: "No, 24 to 28". She was smiling at that and wrote down "- 28", I guess my persistence amused her.

She said that she could probably give me more hours by October and on Friday I understood why as an older colleague of mine gave us all cupcakes and announced her retirement three months from now. She work 30 or so hours per week, so now everyone else can get some of those hours... (And this colleague will enjoy some "early" retirement as she is in her 50s, so I wished her a lot of happy years of freedom* - maybe I gave away my ERE-inclinations there! ).

I didn't ask for a raise, but I'm still getting annual raises that everybody gets when they first start out. The first ten years you get a raise every year. After that, only a correction for inflation every year (if you're lucky).

The extra hours will probably be office hours and will mean I'll be working with the blood bank lab on "weird" cases: patients who received blood and then developed a lung disorder (TRALI) - the lab then has to run some tests on the blood and on the patient's blood to maybe find a reason, and, another task, blood products that didn't pass our quality tests (which may have something to do with the donor of that particular blood, so I'll have to contact some donors as well and explain to them why they should go see a doctor). For me this is interesting work, somewhere in between lab work (which I've done and liked, as long as it doesn't involve writing scientific articles/applying for funding) and talking to people about their health (which I like in general, although not always).

Tomorrow I'll be working that extra job of standing outside and asking people to become a blood donor. Promoting something is really outside of my comfort zone, but now I've done it 3 times and I must say that I'm getting a bit used to it. Yesterday and today were tropical days here, temperatures above 30 degrees celcius (86 Fahrenheit). Luckily it seems like tomorrow it will top off at 26C/79F... Still hot but manageable. Now I'm not so afraid anymore that I'll develop a heat stroke.

*As for the colleague who is retiring... We had a meeting and she announced it there to roughly fifteen of her colleagues. The first reactions were: "And you aren't going to get another job?". "You're retiring? But you aren't old enough to retire, are you?". And even: "But what are you going to do with all that free time?". Then I had enough of the negativity and I congratulated her on regaining her freedom. She always took her leave in winter and went to Portugal for four weeks straight, enjoying the sun, so I said something like: "Congratulations! I'm pretty sure you'll enjoy the freedom. You're going to enjoy your life now. I bet you're going to spend the whole winter in Portugal this year?" and then finally this colleague could tell us about her plans to enjoy her life, travel, spend the winters in Portugal indeed, spend more time on her hobbies, etc. Then my colleagues started congratulating her as well. She later came to me and told me that she liked my reaction very much. I bet!

[Hankaroundtheworld]

Great, especially liked the last part, and how you were able to congratulate your ER colleague with the right attitude and I am sure you will follow into her footsteps or even sooner !

[skintstudent]

Yesterday was the big meeting with my two supervisors. They asked me how I've been. I told them about how terrible I've felt. I was met with disbelief. They could not understand why I would feel so bad. And I could not explain it to them. They told me I was 80% there, I know that the remaining 20% is not something I want to go through. The remaining 20% is licking their heels and them pissing all over my work to make it theirs. They've done this with the 3 papers I've published so far. But I can't take any more. I'm done. I've had it.

It could be that this is because I was teased as a kid and I can't take what feels like a lot of rejections. It could be because I was raised on a farm by two people who are honest and whose words are honest, simple and true. It could be that I'm not made to be this competitive or able to stand this underdog position for long enough to become a top dog. I don't wanna be a top dog anyway.

As I said before, I don't need this diploma for my own future or for my current career. I actually like the fact that at my current career I'm considered an adult who can be trusted to do things the right way all by herself. I also like the fact that people (both colleagues and the blood donors I talk to) appreciate my work.

I guess I have become too old to be an obedient PhD student. Well, too bad.

Now I have a lot of free time on my hands. My job does take me something like 30 hours per week on average. What shall I do with the rest of my time?

Well done on standing up to your supervisors. Quitting a PhD at this late stage is not something done easily. Yet however late it seems, supervisors seem to have a knack of dragging it on yet further. Congratualtions for having the guts to do what you think is best for you.

I'd love to quit my PhD, but I do know that it would reflect badly on me. I'm writing up too, so I can sympathise with how it feels. That 80% done is like a windows progress bar, it seems to stick near the finish. Getting a PhD won't benefit me - it has definitely cost me in the long run. However, in my circumstances, not finishing will be even worse for me. You seem to have that sorted - in employment and not wanting to follow a career where a PhD is a plus. Good luck for the future.

[DutchGirl]

Thanks...

This month my income was finally a bit higher again, € 2600 came in after working hard in June.

My expenses were quite high, too, at € 2135... However, 235 euros were travelling costs for work and I will get that money reimbursed (my paycheck will be roughly 250 euros higher next month because of that). Also I donated 600 euros to a charity as my annual contribution to them, and I will get rougly €240 of that back come tax time next year.

But anyway, savings rate therefore a measly 18%. I hope to do better again next month.

[DutchGirl]

My boyfriend was contacted to apply for a contract position in Germany, with a company he really really likes. He had to think about it for the whole weekend, and now he has sent in an e-mail stating that he wants to apply. If it all works out, work would start in January 2015. I think I can't tell anyone else just yet, so I'm telling you guys. It would be for three years and it would mean a move and learning more German (Ich spreche es ein bischen) and getting a new job there, myself, but it is an exciting idea. Quite the adventure! I'm keeping my fingers crossed here...

[m741]

Wow, that would be very cool! Good luck! Whereabouts in Germany would you relocate to?

Speaking German should be easy for you. It's just Serious Dutch .

[DutchGirl]

Speaking German should be easy for you. It's just Serious Dutch .

I've heard that people from Germany find the Dutch way of creating diminutives funny. So the English would say flower - little flower, then the Germans would say Blume - Blümchen, and the Dutch would say bloem - bloempje. Apparently the "-je" sound at the end is very funny for Germans.

We would relocate to München, in the south. Actually, he tried to get a job there now 2.5 years ago, but failed that time. So we are still very unsure about what will happen this time. They didn't even tell him last time why they didn't choose him, so it is possible that he is still not an attractive candidate for them, even though I believe he would do a marvellous job (but yeah, that's just me of course ).

We will know more by somewhere in October, which is still a few months away...

[henrik]

Don't worry, you probably won't have more trouble learning German than those growing up with Bairisch or Schwäbisch do:)

[DutchGirl]

I just got over 500 euros back from an insurance that I did no longer need. It was an insurance to cover funeral costs. When I took on this insurance, that was pretty smart of me. If I had been hit by a bus back then, my total assets would be somewhere between -100 euros and +2000 euros, depending on what day of the month it would be. In short: my parents and family would have to grieve for my departure, plus they would have to find a way to pay the funeral bills from their own money. That didn't seem like a nice situation to me, so at that point I took out an insurance which covered the funeral costs.

But over the roughly 8 years that I had this insurance, my situation changed. Right now they can bury me 10 times over if they have to, and there still will be some cash left. I also know that my family can cover the first costs from their own bank accounts and then be reimbursed; or that the funeral home will wait until the money is cleared from my bank account.
Hopefully nobody will need to pay for my funeral anyway in the next couple of decades, by the way, but if they do, they can. So... I no longer needed this insurance and thus I didn't want to pay the 110 euros/year premium anymore.

In the end, I have put in 8 x 110 euros or 880 euros, and now I got 540 euros and cents back. That money will be put to good use in my savings account. Over the last month or so, I took a lot of money out of my savings account to buy more stocks and also to invest a bit in a local wind turbine company (it's a loan, so it's like bonds), so I really need to put some money back in my boring regular savings account...

[rube]

I concur with your decision, I did something similar not too long ago!

I hope that, some time now after you made a firm decision not pursuing the PHD, you feel good about it and lost a large burden in your life.

[anomie]

I love reading your posts and if i may intrude on your journal and comment ---

but 18% savings puts you on track for working for another 40 years ....

and death insurance makes absolutely no sense to me; I hope you don't have any other 'insurances' that you of your culture feel compelled to pay .... clutch that dollar (or euro) close!!! you spent your life energy to get it...




keep on rockin'!

[DutchGirl]

but 18% savings puts you on track for working for another 40 years ....

It was disappointing indeed. But I'm not planning to keep it this low, either! I just calculated that the average for this year has been 39%. Still nothing amazing, but much better.

As for insurances, I think I now have the ones that are useful.

keep on rockin'!

Will do

[Hankaroundtheworld]

I just got over 500 euros back from an insurance that I did no longer need. It was an insurance to cover funeral costs. When I took on this insurance, that was pretty smart of me. If I had been hit by a bus back then, my total assets would be somewhere between -100 euros and +2000 euros, depending on what day of the month it would be. In short: my parents and family would have to grieve for my departure, plus they would have to find a way to pay the funeral bills from their own money. That didn't seem like a nice situation to me, so at that point I took out an insurance which covered the funeral costs.

But over the roughly 8 years that I had this insurance, my situation changed. Right now they can bury me 10 times over if they have to, and there still will be some cash left. I also know that my family can cover the first costs from their own bank accounts and then be reimbursed; or that the funeral home will wait until the money is cleared from my bank account.
Hopefully nobody will need to pay for my funeral anyway in the next couple of decades, by the way, but if they do, they can. So... I no longer needed this insurance and thus I didn't want to pay the 110 euros/year premium anymore.

In the end, I have put in 8 x 110 euros or 880 euros, and now I got 540 euros and cents back. That money will be put to good use in my savings account. Over the last month or so, I took a lot of money out of my savings account to buy more stocks and also to invest a bit in a local wind turbine company (it's a loan, so it's like bonds), so I really need to put some money back in my boring regular savings account...

I agree with this! It is an example how silly insurances can be, especially in the Netherlands, people want to insure them for everything that potentially could happen in life, but with some common sense and some savings, you can kill these insurances. Personally, I have had no unemployment insurance when traveling around the world, also no insurance for furniture, etc..basically, only medical insurance really makes sense.

[DutchGirl]

Expenses this month were 1590, (posttax) salary was 3160. There you go: a savings rate of 50% !!! (More if you count the 500+ that I got back from the insurance, but I won't).

My income was high due to working a lot of hours in July. The amount of hours in August has been lower again, so I expect a lower income in September, but still OK.

[rube]

Nice done! Do you also calculate your average savings % for this year or the last 12 months?

[DutchGirl]

Yes, I can do that... In the last twelve months the average was 42%...

[rube]

That is impressive! Are you working actively to get it higher, or is this about you are okay with and expect to keep it at this level?

[DutchGirl]

It's nice, isn't it?

I am trying to save more. I aim to get more income, but last month, when it was so busy, I saw some side-effects that I didn't like (sleeping problems, eating too much, being sad/nervous/annoyed too often). So I know there's a limit to how much I can increase my income. I also aim to lower my expenses, but there are some that I won't give up, even though I could. The charitable donations, for example, are staying. I have other expenses that I am trying to reduce, though, such as those for transport (take the bike more often), gifts (stop giving large gifts, people will love me none the less, I hope), and chocolate.

[DutchGirl]

So the good news is that I'm not dying. Four weeks ago now, the gynaecologist looked at my insides and said: hmm, perhaps that is cancer. I'll do a swab and I'll discuss the results with you next week. (A PAP-smear by the way). Three weeks ago, the smear came back inconclusive (PAP 0), so I had to have biopsies instead. That didn't hurt too much, but the worried look of the gyno haunted me for two weeks. Last week I heard that everything was OK: the two biopsies didn't show anything other than cervical ectropion; and cervical ectropion is not cancer.

Pfew!!

I was going to post about this before I knew the results - when I was driving myself crazy with thoughts of "Well, this is it. No early retirement for you. No seeing your nieces and nephew grow up for you." But I spared you my thoughts. Now I can relax again. Hello, life, it's me. How about another 30-40 years?

[C40]

YAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!