On dealing with rumors?

How to pass, fit in, eventually set an example, and ultimately lead the way.
7Wannabe5
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Joined: Fri Oct 18, 2013 9:03 am

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

Same is true for being absent-minded to the point of complete self-absorption.

Tyler9000
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Joined: Fri Jun 01, 2012 11:45 pm

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by Tyler9000 »

IMHO, rumors are a reflection of the image you're presenting to others. By studying the mirror rather than ignoring it, you can learn a lot about yourself.

If the rumors are true, then own them. Sunlight is the best disinfectant. If you're ashamed to own them, then consider why that is and whether living a lie is sustainable. And if the rumors are not true, then stop for a moment and consider what you have done to make people think that about you. A lot of that comes down to emotional intelligence. Perhaps there are some simple steps you can take to present yourself in a way less likely to incite rumors.

Basically, be yourself while remaining thoughtful of others and you'll largely immunize yourself to rumors. But live a secret life while ignoring how you affect the people around you, and things could get ugly.

Loner
Posts: 221
Joined: Wed Jan 04, 2017 2:26 pm

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by Loner »

Smile. Let is slide. Being defensive will make you look weak, which will in turn make you more of a prey. +1 to humor.

Some Epictetus: If anyone tells you that such a person speaks ill of you, don't make excuses about what is said of you, but answer: "He does not know my other faults, else he would not have mentioned only these."

As for how to manage the internal side of it, here is some more Epictetus for you:

"In general, remember that it is we who torment, we who make difficulties for ourselves – that is, our opinions do. What, for instance, does it mean to be insulted? Stand by a rock and insult it, and what have you accomplished? If someone responds to insult like a rock, what has the abuser gained with his invective? If, however, he has his victim’s weakness to exploit, then his efforts are worth his while."

TopHatFox
Posts: 2322
Joined: Thu Oct 17, 2013 10:07 pm
Location: FL; 25

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by TopHatFox »

Epictetus is really helpful, especially since his lot in life was as a slave.

Yeah, I just learned all I could and cut the people and their friends out of my life. The truth is I barely remember people from my high school, and I'll only be staying in touch with ~10 people I met while at college.

The biggest lesson seems to be more prudence with the public sphere - to let people earn the trust required for the inner part of the onion, especially since most of my identities are controversial and very easily misunderstood. It's also taught me to latch on the people that are non-judgmental/kind themselves.

BRUTE
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Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2015 5:20 pm

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by BRUTE »

most of brute's identities are also controversial.

TopHatFox
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Joined: Thu Oct 17, 2013 10:07 pm
Location: FL; 25

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by TopHatFox »

sentient computers have rights too ! :P

#<3brute

enigmaT120
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Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2015 2:14 pm
Location: Falls City, OR

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by enigmaT120 »

Do like Bonnie Raitt: "Let's give 'em something to talk about!"

mollyhendrix
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Dec 09, 2017 4:32 pm

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by mollyhendrix »

my GF and I believe in not gossiping...

how bout u guys?

:O)

Did
Posts: 693
Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2013 7:50 am

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by Did »

yeah sounds like high school to be honest. I wouldn't worry about it in the slightest.

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fiby41
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Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by fiby41 »

mollyhendrix wrote:
Sat Dec 09, 2017 6:03 pm
my GF and I believe in not gossiping...

how bout u guys?
Dear Goddess, bless us such that we may give up small talk and speak like heroes among men!

~Medha Sukta (hymn) of the Rig Veda.

Chamunda helps a person manage tale bearing ie. Rumour spreaders, fear mongerers, slanderers and the like.

Image



Matrikas represent mental qualities which are counterintuitive when obsessed over. Each Matrika (matriarch) is a form of the Divine Feminine who has conquered Her corresponding mental quality. Contemplating Her form helps deal with that corresponding mental quality.
The Upanishad wrote:With our ears may we hear what is good.
With our eyes may we behold Thy righteousness.
Tranquil in body and mind, may we who worship Thee find rest.
OM Shanti Shanti Shanti
OM . . . Hail the supreme Self!

suomalainen
Posts: 976
Joined: Sat Oct 18, 2014 12:49 pm

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by suomalainen »

@fiby what’s up with all the hindu(?) pics in your last several posts? Is that new? Not that I’ve done an exhaustive search of all your posts, but it feels kinda new.

theanimal
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Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by theanimal »

@suomalaninen- He lives in India.

suomalainen
Posts: 976
Joined: Sat Oct 18, 2014 12:49 pm

Re: On dealing with rumors?

Post by suomalainen »

@animal, no I figured he has some connection to Hinduism, but I'd never seen a post from him before with explicit references (and pictures) and I saw like 2 or 3 in the last day or so. Just curious if there was a genesis for the posts, like finding a renewed interest or just having read a new book or something like that.

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