brute journal

Where are you and where are you going?
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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Sat Dec 03, 2016 2:45 am

affirmative

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Sun Jan 01, 2017 3:56 pm

2.1 years of expenses
savings rate: 1.38 (much of it an accounting error though)

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Thu Feb 02, 2017 1:04 am

2.3 years of expenses
savings rate: 1.2

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singvestor
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Re: brute journal

Post by singvestor » Thu Feb 02, 2017 2:33 am

What is the nature of the new job?

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Thu Feb 02, 2017 10:21 am

lots of typing

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cmonkey
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Re: brute journal

Post by cmonkey » Thu Feb 02, 2017 10:25 am

Savings rate of 1.2%? Brute can do better. ;)

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Gilberto de Piento
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Re: brute journal

Post by Gilberto de Piento » Thu Feb 02, 2017 5:05 pm

That's not good if percent. I'm guessing the metric is something more complex.

Campitor
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Re: brute journal

Post by Campitor » Thu Feb 02, 2017 10:27 pm

BRUTE wrote:2.3 years of expenses
savings rate: 1.2
I'm curious on how are you calculating the 1.2 percent? 2.3 yrs/25 yrs = 0.092 (9.2%). 2.3yrs/191.6666666666667yrs = 0.012 (1.2%). I'm lost. Forgive me if I'm missing something obvious. I'm basing this formula from your explanation posted on the first page of this thread where you used 25 years of expenses as your target. So what does ~191 represent if it's not years?

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Thu Feb 02, 2017 10:30 pm

technically it's not savings rate - it's accumulated assets increase over net income. simply saving 100% of post-tax money would result in a rate of 1. contributing to a 401k (with pre-tax money) allows brute to go over the 100%, hence 120% or 1.2

not to mention investment income, employer match, currency fluctuations.. it's really not a great metric, but brute's only been tracking it for a few months, and isn't even sure why he's tracking it to begin with.

Campitor
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Re: brute journal

Post by Campitor » Thu Feb 02, 2017 11:43 pm

BRUTE wrote:technically it's not savings rate - it's accumulated assets increase over net income. simply saving 100% of post-tax money would result in a rate of 1. contributing to a 401k (with pre-tax money) allows brute to go over the 100%, hence 120% or 1.2

not to mention investment income, employer match, currency fluctuations.. it's really not a great metric, but brute's only been tracking it for a few months, and isn't even sure why he's tracking it to begin with.

Thanks Brute! I was racking my skull trying to make sense of your number. I thought I was missing something obvious. My OCD can now go back to sleep. ;)

Hankaroundtheworld
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Re: brute journal

Post by Hankaroundtheworld » Mon Feb 06, 2017 11:35 am

sky wrote:The good thing about realizing that there is no meaning out there, is that you get to create your own meaning from within.
Exactly, I agree that life is meaningless (unbearable lightness of being), but the positive side of it is "you can make it as good as you want it to be - create your own meaning", you have this chance :-)

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Fri Mar 03, 2017 1:47 pm

2.6 years of expenses
savings rate: 1.04

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C40
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Re: brute journal

Post by C40 » Fri Mar 03, 2017 3:06 pm

go brute!

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Riggerjack
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Re: brute journal

Post by Riggerjack » Fri Mar 03, 2017 8:13 pm

I'm really not interested in how brute piles up money beyond his needs. (I'm not saying stop, it may have value for others.)

I am interested in how brute develops meaning/challenge in his life. Typing for The Man, seems an odd way to go about it. Maybe BEING The Man, would be a better approach?

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Fri Mar 03, 2017 9:14 pm

1.the man gives brute the feeling that he needs brute
2.the man is willing to pay much more than any other humans
3.brute is aware that typing for the man is just another distraction, but as far as distractions go, it's a pretty consistent and lucrative one
4.brute has tried being the man himself a few times, and he neither liked it, nor was he very good at it
5.brute is a VERY good typist, and even after years of typing, it's still fun a lot of the time (brute is not relying on it being fun forever)

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Riggerjack
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Re: brute journal

Post by Riggerjack » Sat Mar 04, 2017 1:47 am

4.brute has tried being the man himself a few times, and he neither liked it, nor was he very good at it
Yeah... Never again. Or at least, not until I can literally do as I choose. I've been the foreman running crews and sites, but I still answered to people, and wasn't able to fire the office pukes that needed it. I would not choose that path again.

However, part of the retirement plan involves businesses. There are things I want to make, that are not made now. There are organizations that I want to build. Building the resources to start those companies, on my terms, is why I'm still working.

I hope you find the thing/organization/art/people you WANT to create. That is where distraction becomes meaningful. In your desire.

Good luck.

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FBeyer
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Re: brute journal

Post by FBeyer » Sat Mar 04, 2017 2:17 am

BRUTE wrote:1.the man gives brute the feeling that he needs brute
2.the man is willing to pay much more than any other humans
3.brute is aware that typing for the man is just another distraction, but as far as distractions go, it's a pretty consistent and lucrative one
4.brute has tried being the man himself a few times, and he neither liked it, nor was he very good at it
5.brute is a VERY good typist, and even after years of typing, it's still fun a lot of the time (brute is not relying on it being fun forever)
Why are you pursuing FI?
I don't care what you're running from, I want to know what it is you're moving towards. What do you want to be remembered for?
Your Cynicism and apparent need to feel needed by others clash greatly in my head and I'm really wondering how your personal form of nihilism meshes with becoming financially independent.

You don't want to travel anymore. You don't want to start a company. You exhibit a strange duality towards other people[1]. Do you just want to fuck some skanky doll that you can't stand having a conversation with all day, browse 4chan in the afternoon and eat all evening for the rest of your days?

There are so many whys that don't make sense to me. Yet anyway.


[1] You mention having plenty of friends, but you almost always mention that in the grand scheme of the universe nothing matters. Are you certain you're applying your Cynicism in a constuctive manner?

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Sat Mar 04, 2017 9:31 am

let brute answer this in reverse, because he's learning about this himself as he goes. it's more of a discovery process.
FBeyer wrote: You don't want to travel anymore. You don't want to start a company. You exhibit a strange duality towards other people[1]. Do you just want to fuck some skanky doll that you can't stand having a conversation with all day, browse 4chan in the afternoon and eat all evening for the rest of your days?
brute used to think that is all he wanted - travel, fuck skanky dolls, browse 4chan and eat all evening. then he took some FU money and did it, only to find out that it stopped being fun very quickly. travel actually lasted much longer thank skanky dolls did.

brute might travel and fuck some more skanky dolls in the future if he feels like it again. it's not that he's decided these things aren't fun, but they're not enough to do all day every day, or give life meaning. (in brute's mind, meaning == sufficient distraction == fun to do all day, every day).
FBeyer wrote: Why are you pursuing FI?
I don't care what you're running from, I want to know what it is you're moving towards. What do you want to be remembered for?
brute is hoping to know it when he sees it, running past. incidentally, brute doesn't feel like killing himself (which humans sometimes assume upon learning of his cynicism). thus he's probably going to be here for a while. individuals change, and most of the things they want to do take money. so FI is likely a good use of time if brute ever finds meaning, and just as useless as everything else if he doesn't. brute also enjoys watching numbers grow.
FBeyer wrote: Your Cynicism and apparent need to feel needed by others clash greatly in my head and I'm really wondering how your personal form of nihilism meshes with becoming financially independent.
You mention having plenty of friends, but you almost always mention that in the grand scheme of the universe nothing matters.
for brute, Nihilism isn't an ideology (=nothing should matter), it is a realization. thus there is no real clash or paradox - just like there exist chickens and eggs that apparently never heard of the chicken-egg-paradox.
in the end, brute is run mostly by low-level, unconscious functions, like most individuals. the intellectual philosophy he comes up with is likely more of a pattern that matches his incidental unconscious preferences, rather than a strategic vision. again, like most individuals.

in the grand scheme of things (=universe), quite obviously, nothing matters. especially nothing that humans can do. even if humans nuke the entire planet and leave no trace of it, which is probably beyond their reach, it would hardly matter. nobody would remember. the other planets would keep flying around. the solar system would continue soaring through the milky way or however that works. in terms of entropy changed that day in the universe, the change would hardly be detectable.

these statements are not very controversial, brute thinks. what's controversial is brute thinking about them. but if it's controversial to think about somewhat uncontroversial things, doesn't that mean that humans simply don't WANT to think about them? either because they're trivially true, or they want to distract themselves from them.

so brute's conclusion is that the way in which he is defective is his lack of attachment to his own life, or the life of the human species, in the abstract. he finds nothing morbid in talking about the heat death of the universe, and of every life form in it, including all humans who'll ever live. this just does not faze brute emotionally. this does not mean that brute doesn't get fazed emotionally in regards to humans, ever. just that he seems to have more emotional distance in some intellectual pursuits.

edit:
FBeyer wrote: Are you certain you're applying your Cynicism in a constructive manner?
brute is certain that without a goal or meaning, there can be no constructive measure to any activity. brute is somewhat hedging his bets by pursuing FI, but not too much, so he can say "Carpe Diem" and check out any time, but potentially fund some meaningful behavior in the future, should he find it.

other than that, what would FBeyer consider a constructive application of Cynicism?

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FBeyer
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Re: brute journal

Post by FBeyer » Sat Mar 04, 2017 1:18 pm

BRUTE wrote:let brute answer this in reverse, because he's learning about this himself as he goes. it's more of a discovery process.
...
other than that, what would FBeyer consider a constructive application of Cynicism?
Cognitively too dysfunctional to make sense of actual thought-out responses. Will return when brain works. Expect time lag. Not due to disinterest.

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Eureka
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Re: brute journal

Post by Eureka » Sat Mar 04, 2017 1:37 pm

@brute
Your mood resembles me of Melancholia, a movie by Lars von Trier where a huge planet, Melancholia, engulfs Planet Earth and every single trace of life and anything else that has ever occurred here is gone and lost forever.

Clearly making all we do, think and plan absolutely meaningless.

The opening scenes envision the last minutes of Earth and, as far as I recall, is the most beautiful movie prelude I have ever seen.

https://youtu.be/1JEYnjKxf4A

(If you are looking for a practical application, making a movie like this one is)

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Sat Mar 04, 2017 2:42 pm

brute tried to watch that movie, but like most Von Trier movies, aborted due to acute boredom. but Danish films/TV do have a nice sort of melancholy to them, when brute has watched them. for example, brute really liked the mood of The Bridge (Bruggen? something like that), and some other Kim Bodnia and Mads Mikkelsen movies. seems Nicolas Refn is a director more to brute's taste, hasn't he also made Drive? great sense of melancholy in that one, too.

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chenda
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Re: brute journal

Post by chenda » Sat Mar 04, 2017 3:02 pm

Mikebos (who sadly no longer posts) wrote a good blog post on nilism:

'I suppose my beliefs could be summed up most easily by calling it existential nihilism. The worldview of choice among angst-ridden teens. Though I manage to hold such views while simultaneously whistling a happy tune.'

http://lackingambition.com/?p=1416

Scandi dramas are pretty awesome.

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BRUTE
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Re: brute journal

Post by BRUTE » Sat Mar 04, 2017 3:51 pm

chenda wrote:I manage to hold [existential nihilist] views while simultaneously whistling a happy tune.
the true sign of a master nihilist

scriptbunny
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Re: brute journal

Post by scriptbunny » Sat Mar 04, 2017 3:59 pm

Clearly a nihilist, but is brute in crisis? We have established pretty well that brute doesn't seem to feel life in general and his life in particular have meaning. But, I think the question not yet answered and still ambiguous is this: Does brute want to feel like his life has meaning?

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Riggerjack
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Re: brute journal

Post by Riggerjack » Sat Mar 04, 2017 4:10 pm

Adam carrolla is shallow, and too fond of fart jokes, but he did a fine job of defining the difference between fun, and satisfying.
travel, fuck skanky dolls, browse 4chan and eat all evening
Is fun. But it isn't satisfying. It is the cookies and chips of life, nice, but nothing to live on.
The satisfying things I have done were most certainly not fun. But they are the things that make me feel good about me and my life.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FOR-F5we31k

INTJs find extremes easy, and natural. I have spent the last 15 years introducing an unnatural moderation to my life. I am better for it.

I recommend you try adding something unpleasant, but satisfying to your life.

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