Struggling a bit with ERE

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Rachel
Posts: 7
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2011 4:52 pm

Post by Rachel »

Hello there, this is my first post. I early retired extreme at 37 about a year ago. I live in the UK. I think that I have FIRED but I suppose that remains to be seen re inflation etc. It is great to find a group of like minded souls to hopefully bounce ideas off.
Anyway I am struggling a bit with ERE. In order to FIRE I had to change a lot of things. I sold my house, moved 300 miles to a place with a MUCH cheaper cost of living and of course gave up my job. But I find myself feeling isolated and I suppose I am fumbling around for a bit for an outlet. Now I have hobbies which I enjoyed with relish when I first gave up the grind, but now the spark has gone. I think if you do something often enough it becomes repetitive.
I worry sometimes about my emotional health because I would love to find like minded individuals locally, or even people the same age to interact with but that just isnt here. I suppose most people my age are busy paying off mortgages, raising kids and working the grind, none of which I am interested in. I thought about doing some travelling but I think travelling in itself has diminishing returns I the thought of spending a truck load of money travelling scares me.
I thought about getting a p/t job of sorts, some sort of jo job but unemployment is so high here any sort of unskilled work is in high demand.
I dont really have any regrets about leaving the grind, I could not stand to sit in an office cage any longer, although I do wish sometimes I had saved a bit more money.
Currently paying £450.00 in rent, but I dont want to pay rent in perpetuity, really should buy something but it has to be in a low cost of living area, its difficult to find something like this in the UK with the cost of land being so high.
Is anyone else experiencing similar issues?


jacob
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Post by jacob »

See viewtopic.php?t=1222
I sometimes think about the value of designating a specific city for everybody to move to in order to have more people locally (within biking distance of course ;) ) with the same mindset.
Similar to how the http://freestateproject.org/ was done.
All we need to do is to designate such cities (after some long pro/con arguments).


Maus
Posts: 505
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 10:43 pm

Post by Maus »

@Rachel

You hit on a real issue that faces single EREistas. If you don't have a likeminded SO or live in an area where a handful of EREistas live, you might be in for a bit of loneliness. If you're a strong "I" that might not matter much; but if your a strong "E" (as I am), it presents a challenge.
I am not yet unjobbed, but I do have frequent three and four-day weekends. One thing I've noticed is that my friends who have no interest in ERE are rarely available on any day but Saturday or Sunday to do anything that doesn't involve an event, typically with its associated fee. I recognize that this places the onus on me to find opportunites, either volunteering or taking classes or such, to meet other unjobbed people.
One of the challenges of moving to an area with a low cost of living is that many of the residents found there are living paycheck to paycheck and are hyper-dependent on their jobs. There isn't going to be much opportunity for socialization and shared values.
I think that @Jacob is right in suggesting that the only real solution to forming tight communities of EREistas is to choose a few moderate to large cities and enourage people to relocate there. Theoretically, the pioneers would be predominately more self-reliant "I" types and the follower-ons would be the "E" types, who need the assurance of a critical mass of folks -- especially if they don't want to burn out any one individual introvert through overexposure.


dragoncar
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Joined: Fri Oct 29, 2010 7:17 pm

Post by dragoncar »

Preferably, the city is large enough to provide an abundance of free/cheap used items offcast from the non-ERE. In other words, we don't want to overwhelm the free/cheap stuff market of a small town.


jacob
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Post by jacob »

@dragoncar - I think to a large extent, we'd provide each other with free/cheap stuff. I don't think this would be a problem. I freecycle about as much out (when I no longer have any use for it) as I take in.


jacob
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Post by jacob »

I started a new thread on deciding on ERE City
viewtopic.php?t=1299


mikeBOS
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Post by mikeBOS »

I don't have many ERE friends. But I do have lots of poor friends and friends who are students.
Just because I'm approaching FI doesn't mean I can't be friends with someone who probably never will. We have different values. But we still laugh at the same jokes.
I also have friends who have days other than Saturday and Sunday off. They're happy to have someone to hang out with too, since most their friends work m-f.
I've also always had inter-generational friendships. That helps too. My friends vary from around 20 years old to 80+ years old, with a pretty even distribution of every range in between.


Marlene
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Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2011 10:01 pm

Post by Marlene »

Umm, this is also my first post, so please bear with me if this is a too late post -
@Rachel - what about e.g. Couchsurfing? To me that´s quite a nice way to travel without lots of costs and meeting new and open people mostly with quite interesting stories. I´m not here to advertise this, it´s just that I found it very helpful and fun while attending courses in Zurich.


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