What do YOU want?

Favorite quotations, etc.
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fiby41
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What do YOU want?

Post by fiby41 » Sun Nov 29, 2015 7:31 am

Image

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C40
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by C40 » Sun Nov 29, 2015 11:08 am

meh.... I want the memes to stay on reddit and facebook (/grouchy old man)
Last edited by C40 on Sun Nov 29, 2015 11:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

OldPro
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by OldPro » Sun Nov 29, 2015 11:16 am

What's that in the background? An outhouse?

I always say there is a minimum standard with which you can be comfortable. I refer to it as the 'flush toilet standard'. I can be comfortable in a cabin in the woods but I draw the line at an outhouse. The same can be said about many things. I always remember my Brother espousing minimal living and then when challenged by my wife as to what 'minimal' meant to him in regards to having a dish washing machine in his kitchen, he replied, 'but a dishwasher is a necessity!'

Why is it that we as people always want to put our values on others? Why does the text on the picture you have posted seems to infer as if what the first person wants is somehow inferior to what the second person is happy with? Yet another example of elitism and 'my way is better than your way'. Someone happy to use an outhouse is no better a person than someone who insists on having a flush toilet.

I want a (fairly) big house, a fast car, lots of money AND a cabin in the woods.

steveo73
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by steveo73 » Sun Nov 29, 2015 3:57 pm

I can relate to that meme.

Interestingly since becoming more frugal and focussing on becoming FI my wife seems to want a lifestyle more like that and I am more interested in ensuring we can retain our current city based lifestyle for life.

We have 3 kids though and although I would move into a small place in a less suburban area I just can't see it working for them.

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GandK
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by GandK » Sun Nov 29, 2015 5:04 pm

OldPro wrote:Why is it that we as people always want to put our values on others? Why does the text on the picture you have posted seems to infer as if what the first person wants is somehow inferior to what the second person is happy with? Yet another example of elitism and 'my way is better than your way'.
I suppose you're right, but generally speaking, I want a tiny cabin in the woods away from those kinds of people, too.

ffj
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by ffj » Sun Nov 29, 2015 7:57 pm

The meme is no different than all of the articles people link showcasing poor behavior. All of it is acceptable in my opinion.

OldPro
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by OldPro » Mon Nov 30, 2015 10:50 am

I agree that 'generally speaking' our society leans too much towards consumerism, etc. GandK. However,that is not the message being given.

What is a big house? A fast car? Lots of money? Who gets to define them? Usually, anything referred to as excessive is being defined by those who do not have them. They justify their lack thereof by suggesting that anyone who does have them is somehow doing something wrong.

Is a 1200 sq. ft. house a 'big house'? Is a $5,000 Mazda Miata a 'fast car'? Is an income of say $5,000-10,000 a month 'lots of money'? Is someone who has those doing something wrong? Just who are THOSE KINDS OF PEOPLE? That is the phrase that sticks in my craw and that is the point of the message being given.

The kind of people I don't want to be around are those who judge others because they have more than the person doing the judging. They are as bad as people who judge others as inferior because they have less than the person doing the judging. Anyone who refers to THOSE KINDS OF PEOPLE is someone I don't want to be around.

Did
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by Did » Wed Dec 02, 2015 9:37 am

All respect to OldPro, and others, but I could relate to this as well. Of course it could be twisted but to me it's just a statement about being sick of the consumption and impressing people you dont like treadmill and escaping to a more simplier existence closer to nature. Bring it on brother, although a decent net connection would be nice. After 8 months on the road last year, I'm cool if the toilet is in an outhouse, weather permitting. You can keep the dishwasher.

OldPro
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by OldPro » Wed Dec 02, 2015 10:58 am

I have no problem with your preferences Did. As I wrote, it is the addition of 'those kinds of people' that I find annoying. I don't think it is 'twisting' the message. It is the message.

Try leaving that last phrase out and what you say you are happy with fits perfectly. 'Some people want a big house,......... Others just want a tiny cabin in the woods.'

But as soon as you ADD, 'those kinds of people', you change the message completely. If you leave that phrase off, the message is, do you really need all those things to be happy or could you be happy with less? That would not be a judgement of you and what you need to be happy. Add the phrase and the message is, if you aren't happy with less, then somehow you are an inferior type of person. So in simple terms, if I want a flush toilet and you are happy to put up with an outhouse, somehow I am inferior etc. in some way.

Words are very powerful, hence the well known phrase, 'the pen is mightier than the sword'. Whether people realize or not the power words have over their thinking, that power exists. If you dismiss the inclusion of 'those kinds of people', as not being part of the actual message, I think you are being very naïve.

You tell me what 'those kinds of people' means/implies to you in the context of the message. I don't think you can tell me it has no meaning to you.

Did
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by Did » Wed Dec 02, 2015 11:52 am

@oldpro Yes words are important (ex legal partner here and contracts man at that) but in this context I guess I just imagined the sort of people I knew who chased the glitter and I agreed with sentiment of getting away from "those type of people." (Ie hard-core corporate context)

True to someone else it might mean something else, but I don't think is worth getting worked up about. Some people will relate to the message. Others, with different backgrounds or desires, will not. I guess it isn't for them.

If you dropped those sort of people I guess it would be less offensive to some and less effective to others, which is often the way with such things.

SimpleLife
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by SimpleLife » Wed Dec 02, 2015 12:56 pm

If I was sitting on 80 billion, considering I can't take it with me, I'd live in a Beverly Hills Clown house, drive Ferraris, have my own jet, maids, a chef, etc.

I don't REALLY care about all that stuff, and would be happy in a small house, with a reliable but used Toyota. From a reality standpoint, I'm happier working to build financial security, so that I can take it easy and not have to worry about it as much anymore.

7Wannabe5
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Thu Dec 03, 2015 7:08 am

I would prefer to live in a home that was thoughtfully designed and managed to best meet the individual human needs of its occupants. The two best books I know of that contain guidance on this matter are "A Pattern Language: Towns, Buildings, Construction (Center for Environmental Structure) and "Home Comforts: The Art and Science of Keeping House." The problem with a too large house, beyond the financial expense and natural resource drain, is that it becomes increasingly difficult to make it feel like a comfortable home, rather than like a barn, designer showcase or institution. Even if you have more than enough money to pay somebody to vacuum your never occupied 5th bedroom twice a week and you went to some trouble to choose the pattern for the bedspread, if an intelligent alien was observing your patterns, they would not record it as being part of your habitat.

Here are the reasons why the picture of the cabin in the woods is appealing. The rear wall is protected by a tall, wall like growth of trees, and the front opens into a tidy clearing. This is a basic psychological element often incorporated into garden design. The deciduous growth is clearly indicative of decent supply of water and logs. It is well-lit, well-maintained, has an appearance of warmth and a hearth has been clearly established. There are two chairs placed near the hearth, indicating that the occupancy level is not too far off around 200-300 square ft./person (cozy level.) We are not led to imagine a family of 8 occupying this domicile. We are also not led to believe that this cabin is just an empty, expensive folly on the much larger property of an absentee owner, and some servant is driving over in an ATV and lighting it up for show every evening.

I once had coffee with a recently divorced, reasonably well-off man who was occupying a very large suburban house with full-size swimming pool by himself (rule, not exception, most of the older single men I date occupy small portions of rather large houses by themselves for just a few non-sleeping hours each day.) He held the theory that owning more than one television was the cause of many divorces. This actually makes very good sense, because the television set is often the modern hearth (now replaced by other lit screens?), and once you establish two hearths that are used on a regular basis, you have effectively established two domiciles. The cabin in the picture does not have a television set as hearth, and we can readily imagine a shelf of decent books somewhere inside, and a comfortable chair or sofa.

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fiby41
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by fiby41 » Thu Dec 03, 2015 8:05 am

7Wannabe5 wrote: He held the theory that owning more than one television was the cause of many divorces.
I read that people who had the second TV screen in their bedrooms had less sex...

Damn, I should try the low info diet of FBeyer.

IlliniDave
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by IlliniDave » Thu Dec 03, 2015 8:34 am

I want a cabin in the woods that is away from concentrations of people. No judgement on lifestyle or values, just away from people. Even if they eat only plants, use composting toilets, ride a bicycle, and meditate three times a day, I don't want too many around. However, given my resources don't cover all my wants and a few neighbors are inevitable in my compromise, I'm probably a little happier with having quiet, conservation-minded, footprints/memories sorts of neighbors than the Kardashians. I am getting closer to what I really want--when looking for my little cabin I found what I consider the perfect property in that neck of the woods. I noticed recently that the asking price was lowered from $6.0M to $4.5M. So if they lower it another $4.2M or so I might consider upgrading.

Primitive is nice, but it is tough to devolve back below the running water threshold, so I agree with oldpro there.

IlliniDave
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by IlliniDave » Thu Dec 03, 2015 8:56 am

7Wannabe5 wrote: Here are the reasons why the picture of the cabin in the woods is appealing. The rear wall is protected by a tall, wall like growth of trees, and the front opens into a tidy clearing. This is a basic psychological element often incorporated into garden design. The deciduous growth is clearly indicative of decent supply of water and logs. It is well-lit, well-maintained, has an appearance of warmth and a hearth has been clearly established. There are two chairs placed near the hearth, indicating that the occupancy level is not too far off around 200-300 square ft./person (cozy level.) We are not led to imagine a family of 8 occupying this domicile. We are also not led to believe that this cabin is just an empty, expensive folly on the much larger property of an absentee owner, and some servant is driving over in an ATV and lighting it up for show every evening.
A provocative take as always! :)

What I like about the place is that there are no visible neighbors. What I didn't like was that it looked like it might be just a bunkhouse. It appears to have electric power (though the lights could be gas), but being open-sided with only the small freestanding fireplace, it doesn't look very snug (I'm predisposed to cool/cold climates over warm/hot). It's possible the building in the "back" is a cookhouse/shower house (little "compounds" can be kind of neat and aren't unheard of). But it struck me as something that was not meant for continual housekeeping. It has the look of something akin to a guest cabin on a larger property to me, rather than a domicile, which is somewhat contrary to the meme. I'd guess the photo was appropriated for the reasons you mention (which of course I was largely oblivious to), and the meme thrown on there independently as though Thoreau would stroll out at any moment along with one of the characters from Wild Alaska.

Did
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by Did » Thu Dec 03, 2015 9:27 am

Ah Thoreau. I always knew he was a mummies boy (he returned home so she could do all his washing for him during his 2 year sojourn), but I was shocked to hear he died a virgin.

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Riggerjack
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by Riggerjack » Thu Dec 03, 2015 9:53 am

The "those kinds of people" is the part of this that makes the message effective. It is supposed to be divisive. The whole thing is set up to appeal to your feelings, using all of 7w5's methods above.
Now, as someone who actually lives in the woods, I saw it, and smiled, but when looking a second time, I have to think that is a miserable shack.

Like most of the tiny house movement, it is about building a space to look good, not be comfortable. A ll the walls are glass. Too hot, and too cold. When those trees fall, the glass isn't protection, it's an additional hazard.

The walls are glass, where would you dress?

Eh. Appealing visual, with an appealing message, but I expect it is a vacant vacation cabin of an absentee landlord.

7Wannabe5
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Thu Dec 03, 2015 10:30 am

@IlliniDave:

Of course, you are right about the open sides not likely being truly warmth retaining. However, the over-lighting of the interior is a well-known "trick" for giving an impression of "cozy" and "welcoming" and "bounty within." It's like the belladonna dilated pupils of house porn. It made millions for this "artist."

https://thomaskinkade.com/art/christmas-cottage/

In the model of the Enneagram, which is not unlike the model of MBTI, in addition to classification as a certain personality type, people are classified as being more or less social vs. security vs. sexual in their orientation/motivation. IOW, the extent to which that individual is seeking tribe, solitude or dyad. The cottage image above is mostly a feminine invitation to the dyad, but, as you noted, there are also elements of privacy and solitude/security. It's interesting how the meme/message is more overtly aimed at the solitude-seeker, but the image is obviously quite overtly cuddle-dyad-oriented once analyzed. It's like a fantasy of having Ideal Mommy all to yourself.

@Did: All hopeless romantics never or rarely get laid. Jane Austen too.
Last edited by 7Wannabe5 on Thu Dec 03, 2015 10:32 am, edited 1 time in total.

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fiby41
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by fiby41 » Thu Dec 03, 2015 10:32 am

Here's another image of 'cabin in the woods'.

https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/O0T5f ... 69-h848-rw

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C40
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by C40 » Thu Dec 03, 2015 11:46 am

Did wrote:Ah Thoreau. I always knew he was a mummies boy (he returned home so she could do all his washing for him during his 2 year sojourn), but I was shocked to hear he died a virgin.
IMO, you're not sucking the marrow out of life if you haven't ever even gotten your face on a vulva or two

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jennypenny
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by jennypenny » Thu Dec 03, 2015 12:28 pm

@C40--I bet you're the most popular 'coach' in your company. ;)

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GandK
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by GandK » Thu Dec 03, 2015 12:45 pm

7Wannabe5 wrote:@Did: All hopeless romantics never or rarely get laid.
I beg to differ. :D :D :D

7Wannabe5
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by 7Wannabe5 » Thu Dec 03, 2015 1:17 pm

@GandK:

Maybe it's just hopeless romantics who dine primarily on beans that don't get laid.

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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by jacob » Thu Dec 03, 2015 3:17 pm

There's a pill for that! :lol:
http://www.beanogas.com/

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jennypenny
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Re: What do YOU want?

Post by jennypenny » Thu Dec 03, 2015 3:44 pm

For a group that's often accused of living lives that are too austere, we spend an awful lot of time talking about food, booze, and sex. :lol:

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