High-IQ Men Less Violent

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Ego
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by Ego »

jacob wrote:
Ego wrote:For eons philosophers have discussed it in code so as to camouflage the excuses. What should we call it?
Maybe that depends on what the purpose of naming it is? ........

Perhaps the reason for speaking in code is part trying to avoid upsetting the people but perhaps also to avoid upsetting a social structure that keeps part of the people permanently at the bottom. By not having a word for the problem in the newspeak that we call English maybe we maintain class stability?
From the Dunning interview:
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-a ... act=2#play
The real sadness, for me, is that often, people are going to suffer for their mistakes. But they're never going to know it because if a person is a jerk in the office, what happens is all the parties they aren't invited to, all the wonderful social interactions, they just don't get to experience. And it's likely that they don't notice the absence of this.

So you don't know you're incompetent. You can't figure it out on your own. And the world is treating you by being silent. Well, how do you improve yourself under those conditions?

Riggerjack
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by Riggerjack »

Perhaps the reason for speaking in code is part trying to avoid upsetting the people but perhaps also to avoid upsetting a social structure that keeps part of the people permanently at the bottom. By not having a word for the problem in the newspeak that we call English maybe we maintain class stability?
But that's just it, stability at the bottom is the last thing a stable society would want. The urge to compete, to show dominance doesn't die when you think there is no economic ladder. If there is no legitimate path, then the criminal path is natural. If you can't display dominance with an upwardly mobile career, you can demonstrate physical dominance.

As I was surprised by communication etiquette in the office, I was surprised by the lack of violence in the upwardly mobile middle class.
I agree. I can't figure out how parse the truth of it from the bottomless alibis it creates. For eons philosophers have discussed it in code so as to camouflage the excuses. What should we call it?
Honestly, I look at this differently.

People who fail to acknowledge the role luck has played in their success do far less damage to the underclass than the excuses they are given.

So I'm not as offended by the self important ass, (sometimes being one myself) as I am by the guy who tries to point out that he was "born on 3rd base", and in the process reinforces the beliefs of the bottom being static.

There are real problems people need to deal with, things that make day to day life a struggle, legitimately holding people back. Being born poor shouldn't be in that category in America.

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Ego
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by Ego »

Riggerjack wrote: So I'm not as offended by the self important ass, (sometimes being one myself) as I am by the guy who tries to point out that he was "born on 3rd base", and in the process reinforces the beliefs of the bottom being static.

There are real problems people need to deal with, things that make day to day life a struggle, legitimately holding people back. Being born poor shouldn't be in that category in America.
I agree. I just don't know what to do with the fact that some people are born on third base. Lie? You make your own luck?

Truth is, I tell myself I make my own luck all the time and have said similar things here a thousand times. I lie to myself because it is a useful lie. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say that I act as if I make my own luck because it is a useful delusion.

Riggerjack
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by Riggerjack »

You do make your own luck. You just didn't make all of it.

I believe that for 90% of us, life really is fair. Some of us get fcuked. No arguments.

I'm dating myself here, but life is much like a points based RPG character generation system. The more advantages you have, the more disadvantages you have to balance that out. Then, as you gain experience, you can either shore up weaknesses, or concentrate on refining a skill or trait. We all start out with a similar number of points, and then we live our lives.

But the "born lucky"?

Someone was born with good looks, with loving, rich parents, living a happy childhood, in a stable supportive community. Skating thru the best schools, making and maintaining connections with the rich and powerful So what? Have you talked to these people? They are fcuking BORING, and usually not very happy.

There is no need to be offended by those born on 3rd base. You can admire the sacrifice of those who came before, to give them the advantage, or you can watch with amusement as they squander their lead. Envy is just the result of poor observation.

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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by jacob »

Ego wrote:
The real sadness, for me, is that often, people are going to suffer for their mistakes. But they're never going to know it because if a person is a jerk in the office, what happens is all the parties they aren't invited to, all the wonderful social interactions, they just don't get to experience. And it's likely that they don't notice the absence of this.

So you don't know you're incompetent. You can't figure it out on your own. And the world is treating you by being silent. Well, how do you improve yourself under those conditions?
This has bearing on the ridicule-strategy controversy. This here is an example where the individual/minority losses so that the majority may remain polite. However, there's also the reverse situation, the Cassandra complex, in which the group/majority losses because the individual remains polite.

7Wannabe5
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

Do you think the lower tendency towards violence is why poly-amorous men are more likely to have high IQs? My two friends who are taking me out to dinner together are extremely intelligent and polite. One studied at Cambridge and the other grew up in a household frequently visited by Sir Edmund Hillary. It is kind of amazing to me that this is possible. Like maybe there could be an end to war.

Riggerjack
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

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. Do you think the lower tendency towards violence is why poly-amorous men are more likely to have high IQs?
7w5, I don't know your group, and poly Amory is one of those things that I at one time thought could be a good thing, then observation showed me I was wrong. In the cases I've known, the circles were all aggressive, highly social women, and very passive men. I'm not saying that the men weren't masculine, but that they weren't aggressive. There wasn't a strong urge to be top dog among any of them.

In my experience, violence is most strongly tied to desire to display dominance, or as a extreme stress reaction. The poly's I've known would only be violent in the second circumstance.

I'm not saying they aren't smart, I'm saying, as I have in several posts now, that smart and violence are not opposite ends of the same scale, they are 2 entirely different scales.

7Wannabe5
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by 7Wannabe5 »

Riggerjack said: 7w5, I don't know your group, and poly Amory is one of those things that I at one time thought could be a good thing, then observation showed me I was wrong. In the cases I've known, the circles were all aggressive, highly social women, and very passive men. I'm not saying that the men weren't masculine, but that they weren't aggressive. There wasn't a strong urge to be top dog among any of them.
Now I am wondering if I am an aggressive, highly social woman? (little bit, little bit)-lol. I think the word "passive", or at least the connotations associated with it, isn't quite right. The theoretically most highly-developed type on the Enneagram is the Type 9 ,also known as "the peace-maker." This type of person is not passive in the like-a-still-pond sense, but actually rather assertive about "making peace." Every other type on the Enneagram is supposed to become more like the Type 9 as individual functioning improves. I think there is some inborn temperament, some early familial influences, and some cultural influences that come to bear. I basically agree with what you are saying, but another way I might describe it is that some men are absolutely devoted to "rule of law" while others are more or less still practicing "rule of the jungle." This is a critical divide in my mind because my father was "rule of law" (Fred MacMurray) and my mother (Elizabeth Taylor) was "rule of the jungle." It has also been my observation that the son of a very powerful man will often become this Peacemaker/Rule-of-Law type. My grandfather was an old-school autocrat who argued two cases in the Supreme Court and my lover's father was a commander during WWII and the CEO of a major corporation (OTOH, the dominant male on my mother's side of the family was my Polish-heritage great-uncle who was a big, burly, booming-voiced retired City of Detroit police office, frequently found drinking a beer in my grandmother's kitchen, engaged in yelling match because he was trying to run her life since she had divorced her second husband because he wouldn't let her play the ponies with her own money.) So, my affluent, peace-maker lover reminds me of Dear Old Dad who banned his 4 daughters from watching "The Three Stooges" because he did not want us hitting each other over the head, but otherwise was very progressive in terms of allowing us a great deal of independence. I had no clue that maybe I could not do whatever I wanted to do as a child, and I still rather doubt it. My lover raised 7 children, only two biologically his, who were very challenging. It was touch-and-go for a while, but I would say that it was largely due to his influence that his 30-something year old adopted son now chooses to jump off of cliffs in a wing-suit as outlet for aggressive tendencies rather than engage in criminal activities. My lover also assertively heads a charity involved with issues of social justice. I believe he is the sort of person who would insist on rule of law and mercy even in relationship to the murderer of one of his children. I am likely more aggressive than that.
I'm not saying they aren't smart, I'm saying, as I have in several posts now, that smart and violence are not opposite ends of the same scale, they are 2 entirely different scales.
I have also dated quite a few intelligent men who grew up in rough circumstances and made their own way out. I think it would be nearly impossible to grow up in a totally "Law of the Jungle" environment, such as the Detroit Projects in the 60s/70s, and not retain some of that into adulthood. However, it has also been my observation that these men usually regard themselves as being not very aggressive because of their experiences with extremely aggressive individuals. For instance, I once had a man tell me "I would never hit a woman.",with no inkling that even the fact that he felt the need to assure me of this was something that would never even cross the mind of a man raised in different circumstances. So, I agree with you that they are two different scales, but not completely. I think the most intelligent boy in a rough neighborhood will likely be relatively one of the least aggressive, and consequent to both these factors, the most likely to hoist himself up into a less rough environment. For instance, I dated a man who made his way up and out by "being treated like a piece of meat" by the University of Alabama football program of the 1970s, and he told me that beyond his physique and physical intelligence, he was particularly valued for being "coach-able" (with roll of eyes), which is obviously the same sort of back-handed compliment as "articulate." One of the men I am currently dating is more of this type, but half-a-generation and half-a-step out into the middle-class suburbs removed (like I borrowed a boyfriend from Gabrielle Union), and he purposefully, for "f*ck you" reasons, retains an Ebonics accent,although he has dual degrees in 16th Century literature and Finance earned with his 1980s football scholarship,and his own mother speaks with a soft, sophisticated, sort of debutante Southern drawl. I am very fond of him, and I appreciate the fact that he is only amused by my aggressive tendencies, but he is far too bossy for me to consider as possible domestic partner.

Anyways, I think the most in your face/space dangerous men are those who have aggressive tendencies because they are less intelligent and they were raised in "Law of the Jungle" environments, and they are currently thwarted or stressed or suffering from some low-self-esteem, like Mike Tyson. OTOH, the men I dislike the most and judge to be most capable of harm are those I judge to be of relatively low intelligence/high privilege, like Donald Trump or George Bush. However, I am not reflexively anti-Republican. If Henry Kissinger was even 10 years younger, I would let him buy me dinner, and I used to have a bit of a thing for George Will (that bow-tie is just screaming "set me free, monkey-girl") before he became so thick-headed-recalcitrant on climate change.

Riggerjack
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Re: High-IQ Men Less Violent

Post by Riggerjack »

Anyways, I think the most in your face/space dangerous men are those who have aggressive tendencies because they are less intelligent and they were raised in "Law of the Jungle" environments, and they are currently thwarted or stressed or suffering from some low-self-esteem,
In a "law of the jungle " environment, being in your face/space is not unintelligent. It is simply another form of communication. We rarely change the traits that have success. Although, by our age, an intelligent man should rarely find himself "thwarted or stressed or suffering from some low-self-esteem,".

Perhaps at this point, we are simply arguing around each other's views...

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