already sick of the grind

[FrugalFred]

I'm around 30 years old and having been working a standard office job for the past several years. I put on a happy face, both for colleagues and family... but inside I'm MISERABLE. And to think there's people at my job who've been doing it for 10, 20, or even 30+ years.

Despite a mediocre salary, I've managed to save up $160K so far. My parents have been kind enough to let me live with them rent free, so my only real expenses are car-related. And occasionally, maybe once a month, I'll visit an escort.

My parents have said they'd help me buy a place of my own if I got a girlfriend or something, but I'm not sure what "help" means and am too tactful to ask. We live in an expensive city, and I don't want to be enslaved to a massive mortgage.

As it stands, I'll need roughly $500K to ERE. Assuming no lifestyle change, it'll take at least another decade for me to reach that amount. I'm not sure if I have it in me. It's Sunday now and just thinking about what awaits me for the next 5 days makes my blood run cold. This isn't a life.

[BRUTE]

hi! brute welcomes FrugalFred.

the living-with-parents situation sounds somewhat temporary, as in even if FI, the parents would likely at one point expect FrugalFred to move out. but a good savings tool until then.

are there other areas where savings can be improved? for example, is the car necessary?

the other side of the equation: improving income. when FrugalFred describes his salary as mediocre, is that even for this type of position? has he looked around for job offers? maybe jumping ship could increase salary.

[chenda]

For your present mood: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8huwaKtqwzo

Maybe you should consider a career break ? You could ERE in a cheaper country indefinitely on your current net work. Or go part time, start some low pressure side business.

[Sclass]

Hey, congratulations. You've taken the first step. Wouldn't it be sad if you were so resigned to working forever that you didn't look up and around for an exit. You're on the right track.

Wow, I used to hate Sunday night.

[thrifty++]

Look on the bright side:
- you have a shitload of money already
- you have a job which sounds boring rather than stressful which is a better place on the spectrum in my view
- you have an awesome position to have no living costs living with your parents
- your parents sound very supportive.

That is an AWESOME set of circumstances

If your job is boring and low salary then you should have time and energy to focus on generating side hustle business and income stream opportunities - opportunities are endless.

[sky]

Hang in there and keep saving. Try to find some activity that gets you some fresh air and movement, and look for something that you are interested in that you can focus on. Ideally these activities should be things that cost nothing.

Be careful of personal relationships that are based on money transactions, there is always a level of deception involved.

[fiby41]

My parents have said they'd help me buy a place of my own if I got a girlfriend or something, but I'm not sure what "help" means and am too tactful to ask. We live in an expensive city, and I don't want to be enslaved to a massive mortgage.

Live with them forever, like I do. They'll keep me/I'll stay until I'm 34, which is when my father retires and we'll have to empty these quarters, assuming he doesn't apply for/get 1-2 year extension.

This is an expensive city too and no apartment in the city+suburban municipality, excluding the post-suburbs and satellite city, comes below roughly thrice my FI requirement/target.

And occasionally, maybe once a month, I'll visit an escort.

Tell me more. Even dance bars are heavily regulated here.

[heyhey]

My parents have said they'd help me buy a place of my own if I got a girlfriend or something, but I'm not sure what "help" means and am too tactful to ask.

I'm intrigued by the "or something". Or a boyfriend? Or a cat?

Welcome to the forum

ETA: Just read your other post. Sorry, you probably didn't want silly comments about this right now.

[JamesR]

How about moving/changing your lifestyle dramatically? You could retire on $160K as is if you challenge your assumptions on what you need to live life.

[Cornerman]

First off , welcome !

As others already mentioned , explore the possibilities for a change of scenery, and job. There are loads of people willing to brainstorm about it. Create a mood board of stuff that makes you happy, let any thought end upon the board and then make changes and additions to it over a period of time.

You'll be suprised of the outcome.

[ShriekingFeralHatred]

blah