Hi - finally pulled the trigger

[scottcoo]

I have been lurking on the ERE site for a couple years now. I check in now and then when I feel my resolve failing and I need a boost. I enjoy all the forum posts, blog entries and excellent advice.

I am making the move to "under-employment" at the end of March, and the transition is more "mentally" challenging than I thought it would. I do have my financial ducks in a row, and I have a great hobby that while somewhat expensive up front, pays for itself in the end (rehabbing deferred maintenance houses). However, in all the years of "working" towards my early retirement goal, this particular issue was not on my radar. I am concerned with the loss of the "social" connection that work provides. I work with some great people and some "not-so-great" people, so both good drama and bad. I know, some will say, that they wish that was their only challenge with their retirement plans. But regardless, it is an issue for me. Maybe it will be a non-event when I actually do make the switch. Any of you early retirees encounter that problem?

[Ego]

Congratulations!

You are wise to think about this. We've exited and reentered work-life several times now. The last few times I've become increasingly curious about the things I found challenging upon reentry. One of the most difficult challenges emerges when I suddenly have to depend upon people on a regular basis who I consider to be a pain in the ass. After a while I relearn a certain finesse that allows me to.... ah.... focus their pita characteristics in the proper direction. When I have complete control over the type of people with whom I surround myself on a regular basis, I naturally eliminate the pitas, and consequently lose this finesse.

It's surprising how this skill comes in handy.

[jacob]

It's a known problem and the solution depends.

Here's a short list of structures
1) 9--5 employment 5-6 days per week.
2) 1-2 hours sports/club a few times per week.
3) Online/social media at random times 24/7.
4) Self-employment w/o clients.
5) Self-employment w clients.
6) Entrepreneur/start-up generator.

By far the most people is some combination of 1, 2, and 3. When I left (1) in 2009, I had 2+3+4 ... and this was enough social structure for me. However, once I finished publishing my book (4), it was impossible to fill my entire time with various hobbies and being responsible for the ERE site (which mostly runs itself). It's simply very hard to find FIRE people with tons of time on their hands. However, 4 and 6 are fairly common, especially in particular places. For example, major cities will have a lot of 4 (writers, one-person businesses, ... ) and places like Silicon Valley or other tech culture hotspots will have a lot of 6.

Therefore, my suggestion is to look outside the box of 1+2 ... definitely don't expect 2 or 3 to be able to expand to fill all your time. It's only a few who are both sufficiently driven to FIRE and then being able to shift gears low enough to also be able to enjoy spending all day catching up on netflix, playing golf, or sipping cafe late for years on end.

[Did]

I'm sort of in the honeymoon phase with the misses, and we are compatible enough to enjoy just that. Having said that, I'm thinking of joining some ex-pat clubs or the like to meet some people my own age with a brain in their head. The locals in my rural Irish post ER pub tend to drunkenly talk of turnips, hurling, calving and the like in a strange dialect which while fun isn't really the same.

They to a man have never heard of garlic. Some have never used a computer or been to Dublin.

I haven't spent much time doing business style things post ER. Maybe I was more tired than the rest, or keen for adventure. I don't know why so many post FIRE people keep chasing cash - some tens of millions, doing things they would not do but for the money. I'm thinking of winding up the company I kept around for such things.

But I do wish I had more friends/social contact post ER.

[enigmaT120]

The locals in my rural Irish post ER pub tend to drunkenly talk of turnips, hurling, calving and the like in a strange dialect which while fun isn't really the same.

Wow. Where went the people who kept the embers of western civilization glowing through the dark ages?

Edit: actually, I doubt I could find better if I hung out at the local bar in Falls City. Maybe more tips on making meth, but I'm probably a better chemist than any of them already. Not that I make it!

[I(E)reland]

They went to America! More of them stayed than Did suggests though!

[Did]

It may be more a rural/city divide than an Irish thing to be fair.

[George the original one]

They went to America! More of them stayed than Did suggests though!

Why does "A Modest Proposal" suddenly come to mind?

[George the original one]

Seaside is about the same as Falls City, except we have tourists and retirees to increase the depth of bar conversation. Nobody in their right mind would admit to being a tourist to Falls City and the retirees that live there have inertia.

People closer to my early retiree age who have free time are usually flakes passing through or are as anti-social as we are. However, I think I'm beginning to see more early retirees. Certainly amongst my social group in Portland area, more of them are turning into early retirees. Seriously, of our friends we regularly see, nearly 50% have retired and only one of them is over age 54.

[enigmaT120]

Well, Portland is the place where young people go to retire.

That is one show that I wish I could watch, but don't get whatever channel it's on.

I love Swift.

[scottcoo]

It's a known problem and the solution depends.

Here's a short list of structures
1) 9--5 employment 5-6 days per week.
2) 1-2 hours sports/club a few times per week.
3) Online/social media at random times 24/7.
4) Self-employment w/o clients.
5) Self-employment w clients.
6) Entrepreneur/start-up generator.

By far the most people is some combination of 1, 2, and 3. When I left (1) in 2009, I had 2+3+4 ... and this was enough social structure for me. However, once I finished publishing my book (4), it was impossible to fill my entire time with various hobbies and being responsible for the ERE site (which mostly runs itself). It's simply very hard to find FIRE people with tons of time on their hands. However, 4 and 6 are fairly common, especially in particular places. For example, major cities will have a lot of 4 (writers, one-person businesses, ... ) and places like Silicon Valley or other tech culture hotspots will have a lot of 6.

Therefore, my suggestion is to look outside the box of 1+2 ... definitely don't expect 2 or 3 to be able to expand to fill all your time. It's only a few who are both sufficiently driven to FIRE and then being able to shift gears low enough to also be able to enjoy spending all day catching up on netflix, playing golf, or sipping cafe late for years on end.

Thanks for the feedback Jacob, I appreciate the insight. I freaked out about the impending reversal of my income stream and applied for two jobs (contractor and full-time). Subsequently a close friend performed an intervention, reminding me that my decision to "unplug" from the working world was not a decision that I could not reverse at a later time. She suggested taking 6 months to see how I "handle" retirement! This unplugging was supposed to be the easiest and most gratifying part of early retirement! I don't know what happened! "Change is never fine, they say it is, but it's not!" -- Sheldon Cooper, Big Bang Theory