I will attempt to summarize my situation as best I can. Any advice would be greatly appreciated...
Currently I have been living in a house that I have owned with a friend of mine for over 5 years. We bought the house when we were 25 which makes us now 30 plus in years.
To me I would say I have a problem inside a problem...
First off, at this stage in life both of us want to move on and do other things. (i.e. Get married, move to another location, etc.) All things that don't mix well with owning a house together.
Also, we are seemingly underwater on our mortgage and if we sold we could be looking at a loss in the 10s of thousands of dollars.
Renting is an option but we would also likely face negative cash flow there too as rents are just below what our mortgage payments plus taxes and insurance are.
I have wanted out for years, and this whole situation has pretty much ruined our friendship.
My friend insists on seeing this through to the bitter end and also argues that it is my responsibility to stick with him through this situation.
My friend envisions us staying here for an undetermined length of time until the house is fixed up and desirable to rent, and it makes financial sense to move.
I think for my own sanity about selling at a loss, telling him to get a new roommate, or telling him to rent the whole house out (instead of just my room).
He absolutely refuses to have any other situation then me living there because he sees me moving out as abandoning him, or not living up to my responsibility. Or something else, Im not sure. Whatever the case he wants me to stay and help him take care of things.
While I understand my responsibilities fully, I think I can manage the house from afar. My best option is to rent the house, and even if we have a negative monthly cash flow I can just make it up by living more cheaply elsewhere.
For instance I pay $700 a month now. If we had a negative monthly cash flow of $200 and I lived somewhere else for $500 a month then it would simply be a wash.
Now you might understand where I am coming from. Emotionally and Psychologically, and financially I am having trouble living in this house because I feel like I have given up some opportunities I could have had elsewhere because I am stuck here.
The worst case scenario is that my roommate will let the house slip into bankruptcy or that he would force me to still pay what I owe instead of getting another roommate to meet the costs. Both our names are on the loan. (For all of you who are thinking about similar financial partnerships I would highly recommend against it even if you think you have it all in writing.)
The problem is that we never had an exit strategy, and now my friend thinks he can make me live up to a promise that I never made. (we expected to be out of the house in 3 years, yes we were young and naive.)
So, sorry that was so long, but I could really use some unbiased third party views about this dilemma that I am in...
Do I stick around for my friend to get his finances in order so that we can exit this housing situation together? This could take years, years Im not willing to wait.
Do follow my gut and just leave, and hope my roommate doesnt turn completely irrational on me?
This is my biggest source of unhappiness in life right now.
My roommate asks me why I can be happy, we have such a good situation.
Yes, it was good as a bachelor. It was good when this was where I wanted to live.
But I dont want to live here anymore, and I am very ready for the next stage in life. I want to pursue a more ERE lifestyle, but I cant until this monkey of a house is off my back.
I thank you in advance for any thoughts, perspective, ideas, or advice you can give!